Lord Fellatio Nelson

Ive gotta say, im in utter awe of this fella. Frostbite, amputations, surviving in temperatures way below the entrance to a Nuns fanny, his toupe has seen the lot and AFAIK he has never left it stranded anywhere. How faithful a companion is that, eh?

Dear Mary It appears that the football Gods have decided to pit the might of Carlisle Utd against the lowly Tottenham Hotspurs FC in the two bob cup. May I suggest you get the Champers out, make sure its nicely chilled, and have a bit fat fook off cigar to chomp on. Judging by our performance today ( I was there unfortunately) you are going to smash the fuck out of us. Yours LFN

Wasn't he an American game show host? If we are talking about the same fella, he was british born ( IIRC his mother was American) and was the Ex husband of Diana Dors and, yes, he was a game show host. Thanks TM for the link, there are a few names that suprised me, well, not so much suprised more of a case of " Oh really?" I actually started the thread while considering whether serial killers and/or premeditated murderers are atheists. Im separating the Religious fanatics with their skewed vision of Earth and the after life from those that have murdered without remorse. Im curious to know if any in depth study has been done on this. I know Scientists have, allegedly, identified parts of the brain that are different between said murderers and the rest of us but does that mean they also have no belief or faith in the afterlife? Is their certainty of no punishment or visit to hell part of their make up in taking life without any remorse or feeling? Just wondering, like.

You make some fair, if not suprising observations Hein. I suspect,If you took your stance on the the age related issue to its extreme, precious few of us would actually "get it" with the "Hitler was a bit of a bastard" fraternity. How could I, a middle aged man, begin to understand the absolute evil of a man and his regime if I wasnt there at the time? I dont think being an adult at the time of the Moors murderers has much to do with the revulsion and hatred of the people who were pivotal to it all. I have grown up, acutely aware of the evil twosome and, consequently, understand just how and why they are riviled by our Country/society. They are the embodiment of evil, tangible evidence ( if you want to see it that way) that the Devil exists, Child snatchers could live in your street and that people, ordinary looking people, God, WOMEN as well as men, are quite capable of extreme evil, even if they look like ordinary people and do jobs like Secretarys ( Hindleys job) Postmen or whatever. THAT is the salient point Hein, these people were ordinary people who did unspeakable things to innocent children for their own sexual gratification. At their trial the prosecution played recordings that Hindley and Brady made, recordings of their torture of one of their victims, Lesley Anne Downey, recordings that are still too harrowing to ever be fully released. Just what did they get out of taping a childs screams, begging for her mummy while being sadistically tortured? We know that everbody involved in that trial was deeply affected by it. Those two didnt just destroy the lives of their victims and families they probably destroyed, to a lesser degree, an age of innocence that this country had, evil wasnt just for wars, it was on our own doorsteps too. Brady? I understand peoples wishes for great harm to come to him, although from a personal perspective, I dont believe in the death penalty because people like Brady would have escaped justice long ago. As it is, he has had to spend the last 46 years in a prison cell playing cat and mouse with his captors ( us) and its been a game he could never possibly win, even if he did know where Keith Bennetts body is , which he doesnt. Anyway, thats one response to your post, I dont know if everybody else would agree with my points but, perhaps, if you are not British, you cannot really understand the whole thrust of how our society thinks towards Ian Brady. Life after death is a moot point. You either believe or you dont, I do. The debate, however, is fuggin pointless coz I cant prove that it does and you cant prove that it doesnt!! Regards LFN

That's really sad that she passed away without being able to find her son's remains and give him a proper burial. I hope she comes back to haunt Brady to the end of his days. That may be all irrelevant now. If you want to believe that the end of our lives are not the end but just one door closing and another opening, her boy was there to meet her when she passed over or summat. Nearly 50 years of living the torture she lived, death is a blessed relief, she is with her son again.

Aye, there is. We are fucking clever. Regards LFN.

Impressive, very impressive!! You can be the forums answer to James Burke.

Oh my, that brings back memories of my first visit to Amsterdam ..... no one warned me .... all my lovely shoes were ruined, the heels skinned on the cobbles. No wonder they wear clogs Only the heels skinned? Well If you came back from Hamsterdam without your knees and elbows skinned, Id suggest you didnt have a very good time at all!!!!

I love a bit of Glen Campbell, he even did a song about me job! Ok, ok, its about an Electricity engineer not a telephone one but.......

Thats made me chuckle! Fear not fella, Im hung like a chinese hamster anyway, If im to get beyond the magic 3 inches id need to hang an Elephant off the end of it and hope it was stretchable or summat. Yours "lowering the tone again" LFN

Im gutted! Sid WAS modern televised Darts. For a time, long ago, I had dreamed that, perhaps, Sid and MPFC were one and the same, alas, Mary was a sound fella in his own right and not Super Sid. Enjoy some of Sids work. “Bristow reasons . . . Bristow quickens ... Aaah, Bristow.” “Jockey Wilson . . . What an athlete.” “That was like throwing three pickled onions into a thimble!” “He's about as predictable as a Wasp on speed” “Look at the man go, its like trying to stop a waterbuffalo with a pea-shooter” “The atmosphere is so tense, if Elvis walked in with a portion of chips, you could hear the vinegar sizzle on them” “Big Cliff Lazarenko's idea of exercise is sitting in a room with the windows open taking the lid off something cool and fizzy.” “It's like trying to pin down a kangaroo on a trampoline” “Well as giraffes say, you don't get no leaves unless you stick your neck out” “His eyes are bulging like the belly of a hungry chaffinch” “That's the greatest comeback since Lazarus.” “It's the nearest thing to public execution this side of Saudi Arabia.” “His physiognomy is that of a weeping Madonna.” “He's as cool as a prized marrow!” “Under that heart of stone beat muscles of pure flint.”[/indent] “He looks about as happy as a penguin in a microwave.” “The pendulum swinging back and forth like a metronome” “His face is sagging with tension.” “The fans now, with their eyes pierced on the dart board.” “He's been burning the midnight oil at both ends.” “That's like giving Dracula the keys to the blood bank” “As they say at the DHSS, we're getting the full benefit here.” “He is as slick as minestrone soup” “There hasn't been this much excitement since the Romans fed the Christians to the Lions.” “The players are under so much duress, it's like duressic park out there!” “This lad has more checkouts than Tescos.” “John Lowe is striding out like Alexander the Great conquering the Persians” “When I see Steve Davis I see two letters... C S... Cue Sorceror” “By the time of the final on Sunday he should be fit to burst!” “There's only one word for that - magic darts!” “Keith Deller's not just an underdog, he's an underpuppy!” “I don't know what he's had for breakfast but Taylor knocked the Snap, Crackle and Pop outta Bristow” “Even Hypotenuse would have trouble working out these angles” “Steve Beaton - The adonis of darts, what poise, what elegance - a true roman gladiator with plenty of hair wax.” “If you're round your auntie's tonight, tell her to stop making the cookie's and come thru to the living room and watch these two amazing athletes beat the proverbial house out of each other” “When Alexander of Macedonia was 33, he cried salt tears because there were no more worlds to conquer..... Bristow's only 27.” “Eat your heart out Harold Pinter, we've got drama with a capital D in Essex.” “If we'd had Phil Taylor at Hastings against the Normans, they'd have gone home.” “He's playing out of his pie crust.” “They won't just have to play outta their skin to beat Phil Taylor. They'll have to play outta their essence!” “Darts players are probably a lot fitter than most footballers in overall body strength.” “There's no one quicker than these two tungsten tossers... ” “Look at him as he takes his stance, like he has been sculptured, whereas Bobby George is like the Hunchback of Notre Dame.” “He's playing like Robin Hood in the Nottingham super league” “Phil Taylor's got the consistency of a planet ... and he's in a darts orbit!” “The atmosphere is a cross between the Munich Beer Festival and the Coliseum when the Christians were on the menu.” “Jockey Wilson, he comes from the valleys and he's chuffing like a choo-choo train!” “He's like D'Artagnan at the scissor factory.” “Steve Beaton, he's not Adonis, he's THE donis”

You are all heart, arent you! EDIT: Hey, CA, we have a virtual identical post count! Does this mean we are a bit compatible or summat? Can we share bodily fluids and, mebbee, lay back to, contentedly, puff on a ciggy afterwards? Just wondering, like.... Can you reach? I can reach a loooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooong way, baby!!!!

You are all heart, arent you! EDIT: Hey, CA, we have a virtual identical post count! Does this mean we are a bit compatible or summat? Can we share bodily fluids and, mebbee, lay back to, contentedly, puff on a ciggy afterwards? Just wondering, like....

There was a documentary on the other night ( BBC 3, I think?) about the Special Olympics. Seeing that was something beautiful, youngsters/adults untarnished by the hype and bullshit of The Olympics which lost its integrity long ago ( see the other documentary on the same channel about Ben Johnson) and has now, seemingly, royally fucked over the Paralympics.

I had to read that twice before i got it.....

Facing charges but out on bail. The Judge has stated that it is utterly pointless confiscating his passport as he is so rich he could leave the country if he wanted to anyway.

If only 9 turn up can I have the last one? Why? Do you need another tube of Anusol then?

See? Im not quite as stupid as i fucking look, am I.

What?!? You are one of the most inoffensive people I have ever met!! Unfortunately the definition of being an internet troll has become somewhat blurred over the last year and it is entirely possible that DDTs arse dropped out of his underpants at the faintest possiblility that the irate poster condeming the thread COULD have decided to take somesort of legal redress. That could have left him, and others wide open and fucked the whole concept of the forum for ever. Well thats how I read his letter of apology. Its a shame really, the forum has, generally, decended into something it never wanted to be ( a pile of old wank) and DDTs post and the whole subject matter pertaining to it was way to complex ( obviously) for people to discuss on here as they once would have. Well there you are fella, the forum has preferred to throw the baby out and keep the afterbirth and when you log in, you can see tangible evidence of the consequences. Stop beating yourself up, you have nothing to beat yourself up for!

No. Didn't think so. Then again, it's surely an odds-on certainty that along with setting an all-time attendance record for Scots Division Three the new club's colllision with - say - East Stirlingshire might set a margin of victory record for the same league. Bring it on, or summat. Aye, its possible. Realistically, there is a fair old Protestant gene pool of talent in those parts who would not wish to play for anybody but Rangers. Irrespective of what division they are in or whether they have to sell their players and play their matches on the back streets of Glasgow, I suspect, that they will still be a big enough draw for the talented individuals who can see the long game as opposed to short term pain, or summat. Mebbee there will be a cricket score in one of those games, it may be worth putting a bet on, when everything is sorted, stating that Rangers will score more than 10 goals in a game next season. I could 'appen.

Ok, 5 out the 12 had highest attendance when OF not the visitors last year. But I would temper that as being slightly scewed as a lot of season ticket holders at places like Motherwell and St. Mirren don't go to the OF games because of the atmosphere, but they count as being there for the figures. With regards to their millions of fans, lol, they support an extinct entity. Nothing wrong with that, I used to know a couple of people that described themselves as Meadowbank fans, years after they died. What is it so far? 300 Season ticket renewals ? (and that when the newco took the dd's without asking). This is not like Leeds who retained their history. Leeds did not Liquidate. Newco doesn't even own Ibrox ffs, hived off to Sevco (Scotland) I think. It looks like Green is aiming for a sell off if he can outmanouvre BDO (liquidators). Can't be ersed digging up the names but 2 of his backers are into residential property development, 1 specifically for Saudis. Ibrox is listed, but so was Highbury and it incorporated the listed parts into the flats. And remember, all this is through virtually no punishments so far, a fine that died in the liquidation, and a 10 point penalty that didn't matter. 4 years without European football will finish of the new company and thats only if Green doesn't manage his asset strip. And double contracts etc etc etc will be the icing on the cake over the coming months. Fair play to you for reasoning it all out, unlike that cock knocker. What you say has merit but, im not too sure, the full implications of a Rangerless club in Scottish Football is completely appreciated The analogy of Meadowbank Supporters is a bit like making the comparison between the UFF and the Womens Institute. This isnt just about a football club, is it. Im fairly sure that should the demise of Manchester Utd ever occour, apart from a few suicides in Hong Kong and Kuala Lumpur, football would carry on regardless, irrespective of the tribal aspect to the game. Im not convinced that the same thing will apply North of the border, the rivalry and sheer hatred runs way deeper than anything seen in England, and id venture, Europe. Yes, the club as it was, does not exist, but their supporters still do and they will be seriously fucked off if the club doesnt relaunch. Im guessing that Skys legal team are now busily looking through their contract with the SFA for any kind of loop hole which will see them make a dignified, even if only partial, exit from their contract. Maybe nobody, other than Rangers supporters, gives a fuck if the club lives or dies, i know i dont because its demise wont affect the English Premiership. Thing is, even if you are just a Football supporter, you have to empathise with Rangers supporters and ask yourself if all the other league clubs are really doing themselves any favours by pulling away the clubs fingers, one by one, till it no longer hangs on the cliff edge but falls into oblivion. Personally, i think thats bollocks. Just my opinion, like.

No.

Their club has ceased to exist so your point is irrelevant, whether they decide to support the new club (0 titles, no history, no league to play in, quite possibly soon to have no stadium and 6 senior players) is up to them. Regards the crowds, most teams in the SPL have bigger gates when the OF aren't involved. You are, indeed quite right, Rangers are dead, they have ceased to exist, they are no more and their millions of supporters around the globe have vanished into the ether or summat. I shall bow to your greater knowledge and consider it a lesson learned. Just to push the point home, id appreciate it if you could direct me to the data that states that most teams have bigger gates when the OF are not involved. Id like to print that off and roger myself up the arse with it coz it will serve me right. Oh, one more thing. If you could do me a favour and PLEASE, PLEASE campaign for Scottish Independence? Many thanks.

What a pile of bollocks!!! Do you truly think that the Scottish Premiership is going to thrive without them? Have you actually bothered to look up the attendances of the other clubs in the Premiership? Absolutely, gut wrenchingly piss poor. You take Rangers out of the equation and the attendances will take a big downward turn which means less money pouring in to the very clubs that dont want them back. So, well done, you now have a One team League ( which was bad enough) where you had two and you have now royally fucked up the arse any chance that the revenue you get for televising that joke of a league will keep pouring in, helping to perpetrate the myth that Scottish football is actually woth a wank. Rangers? They would be better off applying to the English Football league and working their way up, that way, they dont need Scottish Football but, by christ , Scottish football would need them. On a social point, exactly what will tens of, if not hundreds of thousands of hardened Rangers supporters do if their club actually ceases to exist? Thought of that one? Social unrest perhaps? This is all far far bigger than football. Think about it. HA HA HA Sky deal is still on with no The Huns The other teams re negotiate the TV money. More money for the other teams with no The Huns Dundee (hopefully) get promoted. My team Dundee United make more money from a Dundee derby than The Huns dragging there zombie corpses from weegieland The zombie huns deserve everything they get FUCK THEM AND THERE SCUMMY SUPPORT Fuck, you really are as stupid as I thought you were. Never mind. Your a blue bigot then :-) Dinna greet Actually, im a "Lillywhite" Essex boy. The only bigotry being shown is from you. .

What a pile of bollocks!!! Do you truly think that the Scottish Premiership is going to thrive without them? Have you actually bothered to look up the attendances of the other clubs in the Premiership? Absolutely, gut wrenchingly piss poor. You take Rangers out of the equation and the attendances will take a big downward turn which means less money pouring in to the very clubs that dont want them back. So, well done, you now have a One team League ( which was bad enough) where you had two and you have now royally fucked up the arse any chance that the revenue you get for televising that joke of a league will keep pouring in, helping to perpetrate the myth that Scottish football is actually woth a wank. Rangers? They would be better off applying to the English Football league and working their way up, that way, they dont need Scottish Football but, by christ , Scottish football would need them. On a social point, exactly what will tens of, if not hundreds of thousands of hardened Rangers supporters do if their club actually ceases to exist? Thought of that one? Social unrest perhaps? This is all far far bigger than football. Think about it. HA HA HA Sky deal is still on with no The Huns The other teams re negotiate the TV money. More money for the other teams with no The Huns Dundee (hopefully) get promoted. My team Dundee United make more money from a Dundee derby than The Huns dragging there zombie corpses from weegieland The zombie huns deserve everything they get FUCK THEM AND THERE SCUMMY SUPPORT Fuck, you really are as stupid as I thought you were. Never mind.