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Lord Fellatio Nelson

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Everything posted by Lord Fellatio Nelson

  1. Lord Fellatio Nelson

    Boxing Clever?

    A terrible end to a life for sure but, I do have to broach the subject. Does the term "Brain dead" really apply to Boxers? Just wondering.
  2. Lord Fellatio Nelson

    Things To Do While Waiting For Death... 2007

    Anybody listen Beckys call to the Demolition company, which was played on Radio 2 this morning? Brilliant!
  3. Lord Fellatio Nelson

    Ideas and possibilities for 2008

    So, when didnt he?
  4. Lord Fellatio Nelson

    Room 101

    I detest the name Timothy. It conjures up this skinny, wiry little runt AKA " Mr Muscle" with oversize speccies hanging grimly onto sticky out ears. Lard Bazaar, it was indeed a brave thing to do to admit to being a pillock. Im sure your bravery will have the total respect of this forum.
  5. Lord Fellatio Nelson

    Cyril Smith

    Sir, Your heart is as big as his waistline was.
  6. Lord Fellatio Nelson

    Cyril Smith

    Christ, Id forgotten about him, thought he was already dead He does prove, however, that all this keep fit and eat healthy ethos that our nanny Government is forcing down our throats is utter Horse poo when you see the Ex man mountain get to the age of 79. Hope the old fella pulls through. I like him.
  7. Lord Fellatio Nelson

    Ideas and possibilities for 2008

    On another thread Godot mentioned the name of Stanley Baxter. Ive done a search and cant find his name on here. As he is now 81 years old, does anybody have any information as to how he is bearing up? Can the old boy still get his stockings on? Has he enough hair to Blue rinse?
  8. Lord Fellatio Nelson

    Irate Visitors Rage Here, If You Must.

    Everybody in your family is insane, and now statistically somebody in your family should be Chinese. That's insane. I think the statistics are more insane then your family. I'm a believer to many superstitions. Like when the Chinese people bring the baby home they take a fork out of the drawer and drop it on the floor. If it sounds like 'ching a ling ling lang' ching ling is his name. He'll grow up to be Mr.Ching Ling. If what you say is correct, regarding insanity and somebody being Chinese.... Were you an Orphan BS?
  9. Lord Fellatio Nelson

    Interesting Ways To Die...

    Does anybody know if any men have died from exhaustion after having been forced into becoming a "Filling" to a Lesbian sandwich? If no such documented cases exist, I would like to throw my hat into the ring.
  10. Lord Fellatio Nelson

    Nervous Breakdowns- Who's Had One And How??

    I believe she did. She is also known for knocking back the sauce. So, was she so manically depressed that she turned to the bottle for solace or was she just a piss artist who became depressed because she couldnt control it?
  11. Lord Fellatio Nelson

    Jacques Brel's Imitation Jelly Jewellery

    Am I missing something here? Actually, I read that several times and did not understand what it all meant. For some reason, later on, I thought it may be something to do with a record that is at No 1 in the charts, and has been forever,I was right. Considering the fact that I believe that music died in 1984, this crappy tune does not grate on me at all because I havent actually heard it. Its good being old (ish)
  12. Lord Fellatio Nelson

    You Have Comparison

    I think you mean " Your not singing, your not singing, your not singing anymore, your not singing anymore ..." If you havent already registered ( as somebody else ) get off your arse and join.
  13. Lord Fellatio Nelson

    Guests, A Deathlist Enhancement, Or Detriment?

    Ok, so what member is going to own up to posting this? What a coincidence, perfect timing and all that. My money is on Harry
  14. Lord Fellatio Nelson

    Room 101

    Probably the most insipid, gut wrenching, vomit inducing bag of fly encrusted faeces of an advertising campaign on the TV at the moment has to be from Kelloggs. Quite why they believe an extremly false scenario of a Mother and Daughter sticking their earholes into a bowl of their crud to listen for the Pop..no the Crackle...no,no the Snap is going to reinforce their sales is beyond me. The Ad with Daddy and daughters making Maracas is probably worse WTF do they think we are? Dont they realise that we are a different animal to the Americans? That we are cynical, dont go in for schmaltz and all that hugging crap? Everbody should boycott their shite. Just tell everbody that the cereals have got things in them that can cause gender changes in their kids. Get onto the streets and spread the word.
  15. Lord Fellatio Nelson

    Where Have All The Ranters Gone?

    If only they would! Come on all you nutcases out there come on in and curse us, give us your bile and all that hell and damnation bollocks
  16. Lord Fellatio Nelson

    Harry Potter

    And how do you know that reading a Potter book does not release the necessary endomorphines giving you a pleasure not too disimilar to receiving a very long, slow and erotic massage from Kelly Brook?
  17. Lord Fellatio Nelson

    Things To Do While Waiting For Death... 2007

    You know what, piss taking asides, I really dont know what to do about you. You really are not of this Earth are you fella? So now you have Monoclinic as a hairy arsed man from Belgium and, me ( if im not Gay ) as a " Blonde Bombshell" woman, a Nurse and a blackmailer ( I dont do things by halves do I!) Holy f**k! Get help son.
  18. Lord Fellatio Nelson

    Ideas and possibilities for 2008

    On a sideways move from The Cowboy Id be very tempted to wager the possibility that Amy Winehouse is a "choked to death on her own vomit" candidate. Painfully thin, almost certainly alcohol and drug dependent, she isnt looking to clever and I would actually have her ahead of Pete Doherty in the race to the casket.
  19. Lord Fellatio Nelson

    Things To Do While Waiting For Death... 2007

    Receive PMs like the following and spend the rest of eternity thinking " What the f**k were they on?" "So let me crack down to the bottom line here. **** ******* the member who you've claimed to know nothing about has revealed that you are the blond bomb shell nurse that takes care of him day in and day out and who works long hard hours. You were threatening him with dangerous consequences at the expense of breaking his universal silence. My question for you is are you the lover of **.*******? "
  20. Lord Fellatio Nelson

    Golf: The 19th Hole

    Probably the funniest thing ive read so far ( with the exception of the ramblings of BS ) is the article at the back of the Sun ( yes Im a working class thick bastard) in which Gary Player suggests that the drugs problem in sport has now surfaced in Golf. He believes that at least 10 top class pros are on something (Mogadon?) illegal. Performance enhancing drugs and Golf? Is it April Fools? WTFs it all about? 'Topic merged with existing Golf topic'. Lady G.
  21. Lord Fellatio Nelson

    Chris Langham

    Personally I would cut his bollocks off and feed them to him IF he is actually guilty. Equally guilty is the girls ,feckless moron of a "mother" ( in the loosest tems possible) who allowed such a "close friendship" unsupervised. FFS the man is a pig ugly 57 year old, would YOU allow your daughter to spend time with him alone? In any case, dont get too excited, whatever the result, he aint departing from this Earth in a hurry.
  22. Lord Fellatio Nelson

    Death List Convention

    September could be good for me. PS: You are no chump.
  23. Lord Fellatio Nelson

    Renowned Mountaineers, Feeling Peaky?

    Considering he is ever so firmly strapped onto a piece of Elastic that is considerably thicker than your brain (difficult to believe I know) the wearing of a helmet is not quite the necessity that it normally would be. I cant believe that anybody on here would be suffering from the "sour grapes" syndrome. Anybody that takes it that seriously needs help.
  24. Lord Fellatio Nelson

    Drunk? Bored?? Psychopath???

    Im not keen on sandwiches anyway. How about Cod and Chips?
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