Death Impends

You read that right. 30 years of the DDP. A mighty milestone few could've envisioned when it was a local 90s affair that had its own trophy. 2024, despite an overall hits tally on track to break the record, felt fairly arid on the headliner and competitive fronts, perhaps portending a mighty 2025 enema. Whatever happens, @time, @Banana and I are once again here to guide you through it... Dear Jimmy - either die in the next week, or go all the way to- wait, I wrote this before... THE RULES are near exactly what they were last time, with the only edits done being updating all instances of 2023/2024 to 2024/2025, and changing The Times' URL from .co.uk to .com. IMPORTANT REMINDER: The spreadsheet method of entry that began in 2021 remains in service. The 2025 spreadsheet, identical to the 2024 one in all but filename, can be found here. It is heavily recommended to use the spreadsheet as means of entry to reduce Banana's workload as much as possible. If you are absolutely unable to work with the Excel spreadsheet, still make sure to recheck GUN's DDP entry guide thread from 2020 to make the formatting of your email as smooth as possible.

1/18/2025 58 Bobby Vee - The Night Has A Thousand Eyes 54 Carole King - It Might As Well Rain Until September 39 Roy Orbison - Blue Bayou/Mean Woman Blues 33 Brian Hyland - Sealed With A Kiss -6 30 Susan Maughan - Bobby’s Girl +4 24 Buddy Holly - Brown Eyed Handsome Man 20 Tommy Roe - Sheila 12 Sandy Nelson - Let There Be Drums

Glad to see Tsuji and Dr. NakaMats weren't missed.

Barry De Vorzon

Can't wait to see all of your reactions when you find out Maude Apatow made 150 teams

Law is there. Plowright isn't.

So, yes, our limp noodle of a deadpooling year known as 2024 finally encroaches to a close, and it's time to look forward with another go around at the ol' HPDP. Surely Carter, Chomsky, and Ruth langsford mother all can't have another year in their tanks? I've already submitted all my teams for deadpools with a Jan 1 start date so will be good to look at PMs ASAP. Rules Points are scored according to the following highly complex scoring system: Competitors are awarded points according to the order in which their candidates die. The starting positions are as follows: Candidate 1: 50 points Candidate 2: 45 points Candidate 3: 40 points Candidate 4: 35 points Candidate 5: 30 points Candidate 6: 25 points Candidate 7: 20 points Candidate 8: 15 points Candidate 9: 10 points Candidate 10: 5 points When the first candidate dies, points will be awarded as above, and the remaining potential scores will slide up or down one position. If candidate 1 dies first, the team gets 50 points and the points below all increase by 5, so candidate 2 will get 50 points if he or she is the next to go. If a celebrity departs further down the list before the ones above are gone, the scores above are reduced by 5, causing the highest remaining score on the list to disappear. Those below will increase by 5 as before. This will often cause two celebrities to have the same number of points next to their names, but the order in which they die will still influence subsequent scores. Additionally, the player is allowed up to two substitutes. The substitutes will still count as part of the player's team, but use a fully different scoring system: 25 points if one substitute dies, 50 if the second substitute dies. Bonuses do not apply to substitute hits - this likewise means that subs will not take away a name's unique bonus if only one team has said name in their main ten. If a name on the player's team dies before the pool opens, they will not receive points for the death (barring a minuscule consolation point or two). They will be allowed to put a new name on their main team, either from the subs bench or a new name entirely. If a sub is promoted, they are entitled to name a new sub. Note that premature deaths are the only circumstances in which changes to a team are allowed. Otherwise, teams will be entered as originally submitted. If Ryan Buell announces hospice care after you've submitted, tough luck. I'm doing you a favor with that one, after all. As the host receives an email copy of any PMed teams as originally submitted, each email will be cross-checked before a team is entered - discrete edits to your PMed team will not sneak by! If a celebrity has unambiguously died within the deadpooling year, but a specific date of death is not provided, the latest plausible date of death will be used. This follows the precedent set by Leah Bracknell, who was a popular hit in 2019, but for many months her date of death was never elaborated beyond being in September. By the time her exact date of death was known, the 2019 HPDP was long-concluded and it would not have changed the winner anyway. I ultimately treated her as the last September hit, and any future hits in that vein will have a similar logic applied. Note that if details later emerge giving a person a specific date of death before the year's game is concluded, the scores will be adjusted accordingly. The Bonus System: Candidate not picked by any other competitor +2 Candidate under 18 years old -2 25th or less in line to the throne of Belgium, The Netherlands, Sweden or Denmark +2 Been on Celebrity Squares (or Hollywood Squares) +3 Death of candidate in spite of extremely high improbability or unlikeliness of same. +5 US Baseball or Basketball player -3 Former or present UK Prime Minister +3 Drummer +2 Former or present US president +3 Guilty (in Notapotato's opinion) of crimes against humanity +3 (with Notapotato rarely appearing, host Death Impends will use her own judgement for such cases) Both of the above +6 Has played in a pantomime +2 Has performed Morris dancing +3 Found dead in a Swimming Pool +3 Died in a farming or gardening accident +2 Death worthy of a Darwin Award +2 Murder, Suicide, Lightning +2 Dies on Notapotato's birthday (16th of May) +2 Death by Fire +2 Death by Water +2 Death by Bongo +6 The bonus is calculated according to the following simple formula: Bonus x (score gained from death divided by 5) Multiple bonuses multiply so a bonus of 3 and a bonus of 2 give together a bonus of 6. This makes negative bonuses extremely unattractive. So a bonus of 2 on a score of 40 gives you 2*(40/5)=16 Additionally, there will be a bonus of 50 points for coming in in 13th place in the Hartlepool Deadlypool. Unless there are only 13 or fewer entries. then there won't be. Nothing could be simpler. Oh yes, and there's an extra bonus of unspecified size payable on the first hit of the team which has the most interesting and unusual selection of celebrities. The host also reserves the right to reward further, minuscule bonuses to teams - often less than a point! 1. Dead means dead. No longer living: A bit like William Holden who having just been fished out of Gloria Swanson's swimming pool, died drunk and impoverished a mere 31 years later. Eligible for a death certificate. (A Munchkin is optional but may get a bonus) 2. For the purpose of the game a "celebrity" is someone well-enough known to get their death mentioned in one of the news sources host Death Impends deems qualifying for this pool: Anything that qualifies for the Derby Dead Pool The New York Times The Washington Post The Scotsman Canadian Broadcasting Corporation The Australian The Sydney Morning Herald Stuff.co.nz Le Monde Le Figaro Der Spiegel Die Zeit El Pais El Mundo Corriere della Sera la Repubblica 3. Only human beings may be submitted as candidates. Animals may take part in the dead pool, but may be ridiculed for doing so, and may not get any points. Unless they are cats with a long history of doing dead pools. Team names which sound like an animal such as "Donkey from Hell" or "Dead as a Parrot" are allowed, I suppose, but may be ridiculed. 3a. Strictly only one team per participant. The submission of teams in the name of domestic animals in an attempt to circumvent this rule is doomed to failure. And ridicule. 4. If a participant dies during the competition, unlike in some dead pools, they don't win the competition automatically. They may, however, get awarded a few extra points by way of consolation. And next year, a bonus will be named after you, perhaps. If you do die during the course of 2025, do drop us a line and let us know where you went wrong so others can avoid making the same mistake. 4a. For legal reasons, we are unable to actively encourage participants to murder or otherwise accelerate the deaths of their chosen celebrities. There is however no penalty in the Hartlepool Deadlypool for doing so. Your Procurator Fiscal or local alternative may see this differently though, so we recommend asking beforehand. 5. Anyone selecting the following types of names will be summarily ridiculed and very likely penalised in an arbitrary and unpleasant way should their candidates actually die or be killed: Famous For Being Ill names. The penalty incurred will be decided upon a name dying and obiting, and is dependent on the host's opinion of the degree of a name's FFBI-ness. A very select few, like Kate Granger to use a past example, I feel have transcended their illness to become a legitimate pick, and will receive no penalty. Those known for longevity are also not considered FFBI and will receive full points. Names who are proactive with their illness, but of a lower profile than the Granger types, will receive a moderate-to-severe penalty. If a name is "famous" solely for reasons such as an "inspiring" deathbed marriage or being in a coma, they will receive no points or perhaps even negative points! Fringes of Fame names are similarly subject to a penalty. I will likewise judge these names on a case by case basis upon death. If a name has some claim to fame independent of their relationship, I will likely be lenient - think Rayya Elias, whose news coverage in her final years was largely about Liz Gilbert's partnership with her, but was a published author in her own right. I will also be lenient with fringey names who have received a reasonable amount of media coverage prior to ill health - for instance, Roberta McCain was only noteworthy as John McCain's mother, but was a familiar media presence during his 2008 presidential campaign and had a standalone Wikipedia page since 2007. But if a Hollywood star makes a tearful post to Instagram about how their sister is terminally ill? If the sister never got much media attention pre-cancer, don't expect to gain a lot should she become a hit. Anyone under sentence of death or highly likely to be sentenced to death at the start of the year, unless they die by means other than execution Anyone missing in action at the time of entry submission, unless said MIA name is discovered to be alive, and dies later in the year 5a. And you won't be getting the extra bonus points for original and unusual picks if you don't come up with something a bit more original or unusual. 6. The deadline is 23:59 GMT on December 31. However, unlike most dead pools, teams may still be submitted post deadline - with the catch that any teams submitted January 1st and beyond are limited to 9 picks (plus two substitutes), and the highest-ranked name on your team starts with a value of 45 points. In fairness to those who entered in a timely manner, I will also forbid late entrants from including any currently unique names on their main team. Names that are entirely unpicked, only on subs benches, or on multiple main teams are fair game for inclusion. Because the subs bench has no impact on a pick's uniqueness, any name is fair game for inclusion on a late team's subs bench. 7. Though only deaths occurring up to December 31, 2025 are able to count as hits, the 2025 HPDP will officially close 23:59 GMT on January 7, 2026, to allow some breathing room for late-year deaths that might take a few days to accrue a proper obit.

Alright, we now have volunteers+committee assigned to all 900+ of the new names. Thanks so much to those who offered, and no further assistance is needed. Credit will be given to those who helped when the DDP 2025 is launched. ETA this is specifically in reference to the biographies, photos will be some point after the game is launched.

Kind of like an inverse of Obama, whose first term portrait was stoic and serious while his second term was grinning. That new Trump portrait has him doing the DreamWorks face.

1/17/2025 52 Bobby Vee - The Night Has A Thousand Eyes 48 Carole King - It Might As Well Rain Until September +2 37 Brian Hyland - Sealed With A Kiss 37 Roy Orbison - Blue Bayou/Mean Woman Blues 32 Susan Maughan - Bobby’s Girl +2 28 Buddy Holly - Brown Eyed Handsome Man 23 Sandy Nelson - Let There Be Drums 20 Tommy Roe - Sheila 07 Billy Fury - Like I’ve Never Been Gone -6 06 Brenda Lee - Speak To Me Pretty

Bloody glad I'm restraining myself to a paragraph max per name now.

Bit of an omen, Bluuue Vellllvet was playing on the radio this morning... This definitely feels a Bowie-esque tone setter for the year.

He's one of those names I first learned of from Futurama. Two DDP teams btw.

Congrats, Reptile!

1/15/2025 42 Bobby Vee - The Night Has A Thousand Eyes 34 Carole King - It Might As Well Rain Until September +2 32 Roy Orbison - Blue Bayou/Mean Woman Blues +1 31 Brian Hyland - Sealed With A Kiss 31 Susan Maughan - Bobby’s Girl +1 28 Buddy Holly - Brown-Eyed Handsome Man 24 Billy Fury - Like I’ve Never Been Gone 22 Sandy Nelson - Let There Be Drums 20 Brenda Lee - Speak To Me Pretty 20 Eden Kane - Forget Me Not 19 Tommy Roe - Sheila -6 17 Joe Brown & The Bruvvers - That’s What Love Will Do 10 Maureen Evans - Hello Muddah, Hello Faddah Like I Do -2 04 Steve Lawrence & Eydie Gorme - I Want To Stay Here -4

One of the few living behind-the-scenes 70s Columbo contributors. Spielberg and composer Dick DeBenedictis still remain off the top of my head.

Is this the first time that two members of the same band are DeathList hits? I think it is but I feel like there's an obvious example escaping me. Sinatra and Dean Martin come closest but the Rat Pack wasn't a band per se. Kind of funny if so, you'd assume it'd end up being a massive group like the Stones or something, whereas the Nolans were moreso good at playing to the media.

Nolan is the third most popular pick.

Lovell

Both hits being on the previous list backs up the expectation this year will see a backlog clean out after last year's massive logjam.

I tend not to drop names here, even if I get bored with them. So she's still a hit for me here, but not anywhere else.

Only death by chocolate and GrimThought were in the mood for picking Linda Nolan. Well done. Thread closed.

Unpicked for 2025.

1/14/2025 40 Bobby Vee - The Night Has A Thousand Eyes 30 Roy Orbison - Blue Bayou/Mean Woman Blues 30 Brian Hyland - Sealed With A Kiss 30 Carole King - It Might As Well Rain Until September +2 29 Susan Maughan - Bobby’s Girl +2 24 Brenda Lee - Speak To Me Pretty 22 Buddy Holly - Brown-Eyed Handsome Man 21 Tommy Roe - Sheila 20 Sandy Nelson - Let There Be Drums 20 Eden Kane - Forget Me Not 20 Maureen Evans - Like I Do 20 Joe Brown & The Bruvvers - That’s What Love Will Do 20 Billy Fury - Like I’ve Never Been Gone 20 Steve Lawrence & Eydie Gorme - I Want To Stay Here 12 Freddie & The Dreamers - You Were Made For Me -1 00 Freddie & The Dreamers - If You Gotta Make A Fool Of Somebody -5

He's a unique hit in the 2025 DDP.