TAFKAG

Andy Parle of irritating Scousers Space has suffered a mysterious road-crossing death.

He's in favour of ... um ... er ...

The Notre Dame bells, Quasi? I'll go for Clive Dunn.

The Motherwell Curse continues with the death of Paul McGrillen.

Strewth! There's an unholy courtroom squabble going on over the Australian national anthem.

Claude Choules is the only surviving veteran to have seen active service. Surely that qualifies him as the only real veteran of the war. I know that there are official guidelines and whatnot, but if they didn't do anything...should they be counted? I think that Patch was the last veteran in the real sense of the word given that he actually fought in the trenches. Choules, for example, explained his war as boring. Coudn't agree more. It's good that the BBC and Sky are reporting him as the last veteran. Although Choules did put his life at risk, but not to the extent that Patch did. John Babcock will be the last out of the three though. His health is amazing for his age whereas Buckles and Choules look like garden vegetables ready to boil in the soup..... The BBC catches up with the DL. BBC1 is showing The Last Tommy on 9th August. As well as Harry and Claude, it features Arthur Halestrap, William 'Sandy' Young and Bill Stone.

Here's a poem I wrote to mark the occasion of Henry's and Harry's funerals: Last Post In all my dreams, before my helpless sight, He plunges at me, guttering, choking, drowning. If poetry could tell it backwards, true, begin that moment shrapnel scythed you to the stinking mud… but you get up, amazed, watch bled bad blood run upwards from the slime into its wounds; see lines and lines of British boys rewind back to their trenches, kiss the photographs from home- mothers, sweethearts, sisters, younger brothers not entering the story now to die and die and die. Dulce- No- Decorum- No- Pro patria mori. You walk away. You walk away; drop your gun (fixed bayonet) like all your mates do too- Harry, Tommy, Wilfred, Edward, Bert- and light a cigarette. There's coffee in the square, warm French bread and all those thousands dead are shaking dried mud from their hair and queuing up for home. Freshly alive, a lad plays Tipperary to the crowd, released from History; the glistening, healthy horses fit for heroes, kings. You lean against a wall, your several million lives still possible and crammed with love, work, children, talent, English beer, good food. You see the poet tuck away his pocket-book and smile. If poetry could truly tell it backwards, then it would. Oh all right, Carol Ann Duffy wrote it.

He'd like to record with Phil Spector, but Phil's running scared, the big baby. Chained melody?

As has his successor Sybil.

George Bernard Shaw: "William Morris and I preached the gospel of Labour together on many occasions. Many respectable persons thought we deserved hanging. I am proud to hang in a hall dedicated to him."

So am I right in thinking the podium positions are to be filled by Babcock, Choules and Buckles, with the latter a marginal favourite for gold? I've just read the whole thread, fascinating stuff and quite an education.

Former welterweight and light middleweight world champion Vernon 'the Viper' Forrest shot dead in a botched robbery.

Felipe Massa almost suffered the same fate in today's GP qualifying. And Renault seem to have been more careless than a Kwik Fit fitter. Inanimate objects are fighting back this month.

...You are obviously young(ish) English, poorly educated and a c*nt. And don't forget: Illiterate and a cockjockey. This reminds me of the much lamented Vilebody's arguement for private education, succinctly put foward in the Pete Doherty thread. I think the whole thread would suffice.

Why can't a journalist just take two seconds to do even a quick search for some of the junk they print? Among older surviving male winners of an Olympic medal are Joaquim Fiuza of Portugal, Godfrey Rampling of England (and father of Charlotte Rampling), Marcel Cosmat of France, Gustav Lantschner of Austria, Attilio Pavesi of Italy, Emile Allais of France, Britton Chance of the U.S.A., Sandor Tarics of Hungary, Leo Pinto of India, Joseph Galibardy of India, Bill Roycroft of Australia, Herbert Morris of the U.S.A. and Hans Schnitger of the Netherlands. These are just the ones that I know about. Many of these people are fairly famous in the sports world, and some even had articles written about them last year about their being alive. Two bit journalism here. So to answer your question VSBfromH, neither in the world nor the UK. Sunk.

But played no part in the creation of Roger the Cabin Boy, Seaman Staines and Master Bates? I'm afraid not. They were created in our fevered collective imagination.

Captain Pugwash creator John Ryan has walked the plank. Also drew Mary, Mungo & Midge and Sir Prancelot.

Oi grandad, what did I tellst thou about transgressing my seventh and tenth commandments?

Peace Prize-winning South Korean ex-president Kim Dae-jung was apparently at death's door recently, but seems to be pulling through. Either way, he's certainly not going to da...nnnggggh...must...resist...terrible...pun...

All I could find was this interview with his daughter Anoushka from two weeks ago.

Adam 'MCA' Yauch of the Beastie Boys is to have a cancerous tumour removed from his salivary gland. Licensed to be ill.

A dash too much snow. Somebody had to say it.

Broadcaster Donald MacCormick, a recognisable face from British television in the 80s and 90s, has died of a heart attack at 70. Probably best known for presenting Newsnight and filling in for Robin Day on Question Time.

Former world champion Arturo Gatti found dead in his hotel room while on a second honeymoon. Foul play suspected, wife may be in the frame.