msc

A fair question and I can't think of a more obvious candidate. He's - just - older than Willie Nelson (who knows a thing or two about smoking weed - and also has an improbable hold on life and health). In the party/alcoholic haze stakes I can't think of anyone in Tony Booth's league who's alive and older. Don King? There's also Lord Snowden, Robert Wagner, Peter Wyngarde all still about. As is, allegedly, albeit for an entirely different type of hellraising than the one intended, Mad Mike Hoare. Which surprised me to find out.

He also managed to survive having Tony Blair as his son in law for 30 plus years. I think he'll be in the Drop Forty and Deathlist next year, but making it is the big ask as you say.

I assume you're a jags supporter? Yes, for my sins.

Aye, that plan is also a pisser for many supporters who live well away from their hometown team and rely on away games as the best chance to see them. Speaking of which, on behalf of all Carlisle supporters in and around London can I wish Plymouth Argyll every success on 30 March and hope they hammer AFC Wimbledon and condemn them to hosting Carlisle United again next season I'm sure Carlisle wouldn't mind getting rid of the round trip to Plymouth in itself either.

Also, the German teams got four CL spots on merit, the Italians lost a spot because they turned their nose up at the Europa League. Now they're taking that seriously (but had bad draws this year), and the English tend to turn their noses up at it, so wouldn't surprise me to see Serie A nab the Premier League's 4th spot. That'll be fun, for all the panic it causes in Manchester/Chelsea/etc. Brendan Rodgers is new Celtic manager? I wonder if he can keep up his fine tradition of never winning anything.

The teams don't all play each other four times - that would be 44 games which the poor overworked players would complain about. What happens is that the teams play each other three times (12 teams, 33 games) then the league splits in half. The top six play each other once more for a total of 38 games, while the same happens in the bottom six. This can and does lead to abnormalities where the team in seventh place at the end of the season has more points than the one in sixth place, but they don't adjust the placings to take care of this. It's unlikely but not impossible that the team in sixth place might have fewer points than all six of the teams below them, which would raise an interesting question on who gets relegated... Aye, 18-20 away games a season. It's meant to be 19, but they're never very exact from memory. There was the option for Thistle to finish with more points than 6th place this season, but we went to sleep after losing the County game. I'm of the view that if the teams want a 38 game season, they can have a 20 team league, but that's just me.

Current or retired, so they should be ok.

Look how small the Scottish top flight is. Imagine having to play Dundee or Kilmarnock four times a season, I'd rather be forced to chat with Zsa Zsa Gabor's husband.

Marco Russ, Frankfurt captain, failed a drug test. Doctors test reveal he failed it due to advanced cancer of some sort, though which sort is as yet unconfirmed. One to watch.

I wouldn't, I suspect you might, and you've worked within the industry so know how these things can go. In other words, sitting on the fence. They could have at least called you the Inzaghi or Del Piero of modern deadpooling, though that would make DDT the Roberto Baggio of deadpooling and most of the rest of us Matterazzi and Claudio Gentile, and this analogy is running away from me.

Thistle used to play in Partick (hence the name) before moving to Firhill in Maryhill in 1909. There was a fan vote on changing the name of the club to Maryhill Thistle, but thankfully it was decided overwhelmingly to keep the original name. It's really just down the road though. Google claims its a 3 mile difference, so I suspect Google isn't very sober. Their old ground Meadowside was by the mouth of the Kelvin at the Clyde, opposite where the Riverside Museum is now situated, and a recurring urban legend is that they employed a young lad in a boat, because free kicks had a habit of going directly into the river, and the club couldn't afford extra balls.

As did I, I'm stilling taking credit. I was going to pick your man, to the point of thinking I had, but I swapped him out for another old person with an interesting name. There was another of the categories I assumed would be a piece of piss for getting obscure answers, only for me to find myself looking over Wiki and muttering "What do you mean, most of them died in the last few years? Those inconsiderate sods!"

I just used Google. I know fuck all about cricket.

Half way through swearing I checked my team and found it wasn't actually me.

I think they might stay up. The Southampton/Swansea style teams tend to click in the top league. Feel free to quote and laugh next April when they have about 2 points. I think they won't. I'm thinking pure economics here. Their capacity is under 12,000, I.e. it's less than three quarters of what Carlisle United can squeeze in. In fact, Carlisle's one season in the top flight might get cited as a reality check for Bournemouth. I wouldn't be surprised if they progress the way we did, a brief honeymoon with unlikely wins and admiring comments from critics (we were top after three games!) followed by a steady slide into trouble as everyone susses how to defeat the limited number of tactical master plans at Bournemouth's disposal and injured key players mean skilfully challenged reserves are fielded with the daunting task of marking the likes of Wayne Rooney. I'd love to see them pull off a Bradford City and go wild with celebration on the last day because they finished one above relegation, but I don't think it will happen. I think, in Eddie Howe, they've got an outstanding manager. This alone won't guarantee survival of course, but it's a significant plus. Also, take into account some of the dross that's floating round the lower half of the premier table but not getting relegated this season - I think Bournemouth will easily hold their own with the likes of Sunderland, Hull, Palace, etc. I believe Carlisle started off in Div 1 with a 2-0 away win against Chelsea.Wonder if AFCB can emulate that. (Yes they did.) Carlisle went top by beating - in order - Chelsea, Middlesborough and Spurs in the first three games. Complete league table and results are here: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/1974%E2%80%9375_Football_League_First_Division Which will make it clear that - on the basis of that season - we have a 100% league record against Everton. Rant over! I'd love Bournemouth to survive and prosper, even if that is limited to lording it over the likes of Sunderland. Though when they beat Carlisle a few seasons back I stupidly told a smug steward we'd see them in a couple of seasons! Been thinking of quoting this for a while (with a mischievous smile rather than malicious intent, you understand), but didn't want to jinx the team. Marvellous season for Bournemouth, confounding many of the pundits. Amusingly, nearly everything MPFC mentioned above actually happened, and yet they still managed to win enough games.

Now, old chap, I know getting out of exams is a time honoured tradition, but that's a tad overkill! On a serious note, ouch.

What about the feet of the BBC?

They took "let's do the timewarp again" literally.

He is, and I've no idea. Funny fact - often MPs who seem horrid can be spoken of as really nice people. I know someone who keeps telling me Jeremy Hunt is actually a nice chap when you get to know him, for example. The ones I've met were always unfailingly polite. The nearly entirely sole exception to this rule is Nicholas Soames, as absolutely everyone I know who has met him in a professional capacity says he's a Grade A twat.

Next year, Russia will win as they will literally have the tanks parked on the doorstep for security.

The EU referendum is less/more fun for Scots (depending on your point of view) as its basically a re-run of the entire Indy Ref, complete with the exact same points being made. Hilariously in some cases, some of these people (Gove for example) are trying to defend their EU stance against the very statements they made about Scotland in 2014.

David "The Ghost" Winnick has looked hideous on recent appearances in Today in Parliament. I still think he'll do well to reach dissolution in four years. There's still the possibility of the Heathrow terminal pushing through, which should cause the resignation of Zac Goldsmith, unless he is a complete charlatan of course, which is always possible. The Alan Mak controversy appears to have died down, but the Marie Rimmer one could well explode at some point in the future. Otherwise, a curious thing: not only have all four by-elections this parliament been on the Labour side so far, but twelve of the last thirteen by-elections due to death have been Labour too. You need to go all the way back to 2006 and Eric Forth to find one.

Picked the wrong bloody horse to win the Mayoral last year.

Yes.

I've read her book. It came out a decade ago, but the memoirs themselves end right when Sir Anthony died, as if she did nothing of note in the last 40 odd years. True story.