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Dr Hackenslash

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Everything posted by Dr Hackenslash

  1. Dr Hackenslash

    Richard O'Sullivan

    Carlisle, or as they are better known, Gretna's second XI. Bring back Jimmy Glass, I say. He was responsible for the greatest sporting moment ever.
  2. Dr Hackenslash

    Charles Kennedy

    Mark Oaten, on the other hand, should be on suicide watch. Hope he pays his rent...
  3. Dr Hackenslash

    Sven-Göran Eriksson

    Total Bull. Hitler ordered the tanks to stop because he misunderstood the German tank attrition figures - these included damaged tanks, but Hitler took the figures to mean destroyed tanks. And anyway his friend fat-herman assured him he could bomb the British army out of existence. The backbone stuff is pretty much what Hitler said in Mein Kampf. In fact, he wrote much more about allying with England than fighting her. He always thought it would be logical for Germany and Britain to join forces and destroy France once and for all. Which sounds as good now as it did then
  4. Dr Hackenslash

    Ibrahim Rugova

    YES!!!! Oh the fun of eastern European surmanes. like my frield Pullin Manobov
  5. Dr Hackenslash

    Charles Kennedy

    Methinks no. As he is shortly to not be lib-dem leader, and will probably have a minor role in their shadow-cabinet the pressure will be off him. Even if he does keep drinking he could still last many years (I refer you to the recent case of George Best). I'm imagine there's already a Charles Kennedy topic buried in the Deathlist vaults - mod's please merge. George Best was only 59! Hardly an example of longevity. The problem for Charlie is that now he is out of front-line politics he can hit the bottle as much as he wants, and no-one will care.
  6. Dr Hackenslash

    Charles Kennedy

    Charles Kennedy. Former Lib Dem leader and alcoholic/dipsomania/p*sshead, depending on your personal taste. Given that Chatshow Charlie has been on the bottle for a few years, although he's only in is early/mid 40s, will the Grim Reaper carry him off early? Methinks yes.
  7. Dr Hackenslash

    Sven-Göran Eriksson

    While that's true to a point... Charles Kennedy was an alcoholic who turned up to events pissed off his face, although the media kept it quiet. Then again, Sven is a bit of a sex-aholic, so they are a bit similar
  8. Dr Hackenslash

    Interesting Ways To Die...

    Go for it. AND THE WINNER IS.... Japan Times-April 16, 1997 "The government must crack down on this disgusting craze of 'Pumping'", a spokesman for the Nakhon Ratchasima hospital told reporters. "If this perversion catches on, it will destroy the cream of Thailand's manhood." He was speaking after the remains of 13 year-old Charnchai Puanmuangpak had been rushed into the hospital's emergency room. "Most 'Pumpers' use a standard bicycle pump," he explained, "inserting the nozzle far up their rectum, giving themselves a rush of air, creating a momentary high. This act is a sin against God." It appears that the young Charnchai took it further still. He started using a two-cylinder foot pump, but even that wasn't exciting enough for him, so he boasted to friends that he was going to try the compressed air hose at a nearby gasoline station. They dared him to do it, so, under cover of darkness, he snuck in. Not realizing how powerful the machine was, he inserted the tube deep into his rectum, and placed a coin in the slot. As a result, he died virtually instantly, leaving passers-by still in shock. One woman thought she was watching a twilight fireworks display, and started clapping. "We still haven't located all of him", say the police authorities. "When that quantity of air interacted with the gas in his system, he nearly exploded. It was like an atom bomb went off or something." "Pumping is the devil's pastime, and we must all say no to Satan," Ratchasima concluded. "Inflate your tires by all means, but then hide your bicycle pump where it cannot tempt you." Darwin Awards
  9. Dr Hackenslash

    Saddam Hussein

    This is turning into one of the most corrupt trials of all time. I fully supported the invasion of Iraq, and still do, but this is simply not a fair trial. Then again, would anyoneone in the world be able to trial Saddam without prejudice?
  10. Dr Hackenslash

    Celebs Who've Died On The Job

    He might not be famous, but here's a guy who died while poking a horse. Horse Sex Death
  11. Dr Hackenslash

    Mary Tyler Moore

    She's the one on the right, by the way.
  12. Dr Hackenslash

    Mary Tyler Moore

    wow, she's 70 in December, doesn't look bad for it either. Not a bad actress in her day, and rather attractive. I remember seeing her first film. I think she was attractive. And since she's married to a plastic surgeon she really shouldn't look her age. Ooh. She is a bit ropey, look for yourself
  13. Dr Hackenslash

    Drunk? Bored?? Psychopath???

    Three Aliens ruined my sex-life for good. They shoved a probe up my arse. Or were you refering to asylum seekers? Aren't they the ones that get probed up the arse at the airport? No wonder they don't want to go home Yes, I am in fact the Official Gimp for Eastern Europeans.
  14. Dr Hackenslash

    Mary Tyler Moore

    wow, she's 70 in December, doesn't look bad for it either. Not a bad actress in her day, and rather attractive. I remember seeing her first film.
  15. Dr Hackenslash

    Drunk? Bored?? Psychopath???

    Three Aliens ruined my sex-life for good. They shoved a probe up my arse.
  16. Dr Hackenslash

    Drunk? Bored?? Psychopath???

    Then again, she's got the shortest haircut of all these days, if you think of it. Right to the bone.
  17. Dr Hackenslash

    Drunk? Bored?? Psychopath???

    The lady's not for turning... Oh really. I'd take to 10 going-down-on Street any day. Her daughter's not bad, either, but the less said about the son the better.
  18. Dr Hackenslash

    Drunk? Bored?? Psychopath???

    Should the question be: would you rather shag Diana now, or before Aug 31 1997? I'm off to Althorp with a shovel.
  19. Dr Hackenslash

    Drunk? Bored?? Psychopath???

    Yes I think that would be best for everyone. (Monarchists 1, Republicans 0) This is my latenight bar - And i'm getting bored. Let's knock of politics and discuss something more entertaining. Like women. Ok then, who would you rather shag, Maggie Thatcher or the Queen?
  20. Dr Hackenslash

    Princess Diana

    The word 'Taxi' is what proves this to false. No, it is actually true. It was when she was doing her PR work before the official engagement, so couldn't use royal transport. I do remember the pics, I was working for a *respectable* national newspaper at the time.
  21. Dr Hackenslash

    Princess Diana

    She did have nice tits. And could the French paparazzi who scraped them off the tunnel please bring them back.
  22. Dr Hackenslash

    Princess Diana

    Zara Phillips isn't bad. But that's not the point.
  23. Dr Hackenslash

    Sven-Göran Eriksson

    Apparently, at the Nuremberg Trials, one of the senior Nazis was heard to comment: "Which Hess, our Hess or your Hess, who is sitting there." But the whole incident is odd, to say the least. A lot of the aristos were in favour of making a pact. It's ironic that Winston Churchill, one of the great defenders of the British Empire, decided to give up everything rather than surrender. Of course, Hitler's real enemy was Bolshevism - and he could have wiped out the British Army in Dunkerque if he wanted to, but he felt the future of the world needed a strong backbone - and that backbone was the British Empire.
  24. Dr Hackenslash

    Princess Diana

    Oooh! I didn't care about that tart much until she died. The firm endorsement of the British public after her death made me positively hate her. regards, Hein Exactly. What would make people queue for hours to put a bunch of flowers on the floor for someone they never knew, but thought they did because of the hours they sat in front of the television, while other people were working. The whole Diana stuff made me lose faith with the British psyche, or lack of it at the moment. The way I see it - stupid people have more kids than clever people. Stupid parents generally have stupid kids. Ergo, soon the whole country will be stupid. Even the damn Conservative Party has decided to ditch its roots and join the bleeding-heart liberal club just to win votes. This country has lost it.
  25. Dr Hackenslash

    Drunk? Bored?? Psychopath???

    Well, the only way this can be prevented is if you put down the bottle, wise up, and get a job. Indeed. You moan about the TV license, what about the outrageous amount of tax working people have to pay to keep the unemployed watching daytime TV. The Government should change the system so people can only claim unemployment benefit for five years in total, and three years in a row. That'll put Trisha and Jeremy Kyle out of business.
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