Great Uncle Bulgaria

I was only 8 myself so even less chance (and too young to be interested), nevertheless only 18 months away from meeting Sally Carr in hotpants up close and developing my first celebrity crush....

50 years ago would have agreed wholeheartedly. Um..Jimmy Greaves please

Torch - Soft Cell Song for Adam - Kiki Dee Understanding - Judie Tzuke

Darrell Clarke a hit for me, leaving Walsall to go to Port Vale, scene of my last hit, confirmation from wiki below. At the time of his departure in December 2018, he was the fourth-longest serving manager in the EFL. He was appointed manager at Walsall in May 2019 and left the club in February 2021 to manage League Two rivals Port Vale.

Yes. But only 2 or 3 times, surprising as I've lived in the same county (as Henley) for the last 26 years. Pleasant enough. Lots of art shops. But you knew that already.

Greavesie

Bernard Cribbins and Mike Batt obviously. Andy Scott (last surviving member of long-time fave band the Sweet) Any adolescent/teenage heart-throb (in approximate chronological order Sally Carr, Sally Geeson, ONJ, Kate Bush, Jan Francis, Felicity Kendal, Nastassja Kinski). Thereafter celebrity crushes are generally younger than me and therefore much more likely to mourn my death than me theirs. Cliff Richard - my sister was much into him growing up, he was always on the telly in the early-mid 70s when I was an adolescent and my first love was heavily into him and used to play I'm nearly Famous - the one with Devil Woman and Miss You Nights - a lot (this wasn't the reason we split). Obviously the last 40 years' musical output is regrettable but he was a part of my growing up.

I have some Cup points riding on it for this month so probably March 1st.

The growth of supposedly 'vox pop' stories on BBC (and probably other sites) that are nothing but 'Influencers' and minor media types promoting themselves. Influencer: 'Why I stopped working with Klarna'? This is a prime example on BBC today. May be an age thing, but I don't 'get' the whole influencer thing at all. Why would someone (say) book a hotel just because someone else (usually a moderately attractive if over made up woman with suspiciously perfect teeth) has managed to blag herself a freebie stay there in exchange for writing a 5* review about it on some social media site? If Douglas Adams was writing about the 'useless third of the population' today (see 'Hitch-hiker's guide to the Galaxy' for the uninitiated) he'd have 'Influencers' at the top of the list.

Nor me. My first thought was that she was a porn star (a cutie who enjoys the art of er.. fellatio) who had wandered on to the wrong list. Other than that I agree with Biblio re Kate Bush.

Mike Batt is 72 today. As well as all the wombling classics he also wrote this... ► 3:51 Art Garfunkel - Bright Eyes - YouTube

I had one of those too once. My affinity for the Wombles long outlasted my desire to go on political demonstrations though.

Thanks. Very timely - as I was intending to post tomorrow, 6/2 is Mike Batt's birthday. I too have a Wombles badge (a green 'Keep on Wombling' one, as you ask). Until recently I also had a Tobermory one from the 70s (not sure why, he was never my favourite and I'm not remotely practical/good at repairing stuff), but don't recall seeing it in the drawer for a couple of years....

Not sure if it's the answer you're after, but Temma Harbour by Mary Hopkin does satisfy all five of your criteria. Sweet folk tune, but I'm not sure there's a whole lot of coconut trees and bamboo in Tasmania. Yes, very good you win.

50 year old top 10 hit - a cover version by a welsh act singing about part of Australia