maryportfuncity

I'm thinking she'll be a Deathrace DNS, loads of us compiling masterlists are going to be striking her off once she's gathered a load of support

Carlisle, second bottom of the whole league, current manager has a win percentage of 11.1% so what we need is a new sporting director: https://www.carlisleunited.co.uk/news/rob-clarkson-appointed-sporting-director?fbclid=IwY2xjawGQpWZleHRuA2FlbQIxMAABHRi_i5qkkrS3FYz9w27a-ahxPnARm9Cz86o04MmJpv4ZHdO_ldGMDCkVlg_aem_VhtpDf9YhYexzS_iKWbCCA You just watch us fly now!!!!!

12 years ago today, Maidstone's enterprising fancy dress store sold out of Jimmy Savile costumes which were popular as partygoers went about their Halloween revels! https://www.kentonline.co.uk/kent/news/savile-costume-is-sell-out-for-h-a59134/

It's not obligatory - it's also time for Slade to start climbing the charts, but it's not like we have to stream that song if we don't like it!

Tasteful, hope the makers are paying up and our lads get a few coppers to maintain them in their dotage!

Deathrace Form Guide #4 Jim Sillars Outed elsewhere hereabouts as an oldster who now doesn't recall what he's on about, and obitable on the back of a lifetime of politics. 87-year-old Jim was a notable no show for the funeral of Alex Salmond, will he show up for any Deathrace managers before we've declared a winner?

Appreciate that, spreadsheet underway!

Wow! The go-to for sports stars is often hte BBC SPOTY page, which lists LOADS of people who don't get mentioned in the show

Deathrace Form Guide #1 Jimmy Carter Yer man has form alright, consistent form defying the best predictions concerning the date of his demise. He hung on to see 100 years old, a first for any former US president and is - apparently - hanging on to vote for Harris, and likely to wake up and see if it helped (Georgia is a key swing state) to bring about another Democrat president. Such tenacity is admirable and may just allow him to hang on for Christmas, and New Year. But another big question facing humanity is where the local stray flying insects will go once Carter's unfit to be wheeled around with his gob open. Popular beyond all reason with dead poolers, enjoying higher poll ratings with us than his political career ever saw. A fitting form guide first place for 2025, then!

What's that Nads, they've forgotten you already, anything to put you back in the public eye will do? Even four rungs down the Deathrace pecking order from last year's MCing position? You do get there's no money to managing the rules, right? I mean, obviously, every once in a while we'll get a brew on and throw in some chocolate biscuits. But bring your own mug (once he's stopped promoting his new autobiography!) Deathrace 2025 - Those Rules in Full: 1 - The object of the Deathrace is to be the first contestant to reach 2025 points. 2 - To enter the Deathrace a contestant must have: i: a team of twenty topplers and a minimum of two subs ("topplers" must be at least 18 years old on 1 Jan 2025; but are otherwise unrestricted). ii: Deathlist membership (i.e. be at least a pointless ranter and at most a dedicated Cumbrian corpse hound, or summat) 2a: A player may enter as many team members facing execution as s/he wants but said picks will only count for deathrace points if they die by means other than state execution - murder, suicide, ill health etc. 3 - Entries close promptly at midnight on 30 December 2024 and entry can be made either by sending a team of twenty to MPFC via PM hereabouts and/or by posting a team of twenty on the Deathrace 2025 thread. 3a: Once a team has entered in the manner described above the line-up can’t be changed for any other reason than the death of a team member before the start of the competition. In the event of a team being short of members because of more deaths than available subs MPFC will negotiate last minute changes with the team manager. 4 - Players score points every time a team member dies and accrues an obit (see point 9 below) and the score for each death is calculated as one point for each complete calendar day remaining in 2025 after the death of the team member; so a death on 1 January earns 364 pts, a death on 2 January earns 363 pts etc. 5 - Each team must nominate one member as a joker and the joker scores double points on death. Any team submitted without a clearly nominated joker will be allotted said joker on the basis of the name at the top of the team sheet being so designated. 6 - The winner is the first player to reach or exceed 2025 pts. 7 - In the event that a death or deaths on a specific day push more than one player beyond a winning score the player with the highest overall score will be deemed to be the winner. 8 - In the event that two or more players tie for victory a Deathrace play off will ensue with all potential winners continuing to compete until such time as one potential winner scores more points than any other potential winner (such points continuing to be accrued as per the scoring system described in point 4 above). 9 - An "obit" in the context of the Deathrace is any news report in English from a reliable source. Such sources include - but are not limited to - UK national press, UK national broadcast organisations, foreign press and broadcast organisations with an English language thread to their communication, trade press in English, local news organisations reporting in English and coverage in specialist online sites, such as those monitoring the well-being of super-centenarians. Where dispute arises over the qualifying nature of a news source for obit purposes MPFC's decision is final. But he wants fast and furious competition and is generally very amenable to low hanging dead pool fruit of all varieties. 10 - To qualify for entry purposes team members must be alive at 00-01 hrs on 1 January 2025 or qualify for the Raymond Hewlitt Memorial Exemption (RHME) (see point 11). 11 - In honour of everybody's favourite Maddie-implicated paedo scum a candidate widely believed to be alive on 1 January and subsequently proven to have died previously will be awarded 365 points in the event that a Deathrace qualifying obit subsequently appears for said candidate. In the event that a Deathrace qualifying obit for the candidate is subsequently proven to have existed prior to commencement of the Deathrace all points will be voided. RHME points are only available during competition and in the event that a winner has been declared before discovery of a qualifyiing RHME candidate no revision of the final result will occur. Similarly, if some lucky candidate is awarded RHME points and these points are still in play at the time a winner is declared the points will not subsequently be voided and may - therefore - count towards a championship. All disputes relating to RHME will be resolved by the astute judgement of MPFC and there is no appeals procedure (though all sides of opionion are warmly invited to liven up the Deathrace thread by venting their fury). 11a - Similarly to pt 11 above, if an obited death occurs during play of the Deathrace and is missed despite MPFC's best efforts to stay in touch and/or the spirited efforts of Deathrace participants, and said death is missed in totting up points, after which a winner is declared, then this death will not count for competition purposes. The same is true in the case of a known death gathering a late obit and therefore allowing some other competitor to be declared a winner. Traditionally a period of around a day is allowed after a proven winning score has been attained before formal declaration of a winner to allow for the contingencies covered by rule 11a. All disputes relating to rule 11a will be resolved by the astute judgement of MPFC and there is no appeals procedure (though all sides of opionion are warmly invited to liven up the Deathrace thread by venting their fury). 12 - In the event that Deathlist editing options or other online trickery is discovered to have been employed in the editing of teams, those duly fingered for such cheating will be removed from the Deathrace and banned for life from subsequent entry into Deathraces. 13 - The prize will be awarded as follows: i: Should the winner agree to attend a DLCon with MPFC a double measure of alcholic drinks (pints, wine or spirits) will be supplied by MPFC along with much hearty congratulations and back-slapping. ii: A carefully chosen and appropriate prize will be posted to the winner (such as the DVD copy of the original Deathrace movie supplied to the 2009 champion). iii: MPFC will make a charitable donation to a cause of the winner's choice (as has been the case with all but one winnings of the Deathrace). This course of action is highly encouraged and is known to show dead poolers as something other than the sicko scum many ranters believe us to be. AND FINALLY... A masterlist of entries will be posted after the closing date. MPFC will undertake to update the scoreboard at least once every seven days - typically much more frequently than that. On completion of Deathrace activities the thread will get lively for a short while as losing contestants and spectators offer well-deserved congratulations to the skillful and highly talented new champion, after which time it is expected that the cooling corpse of the thread will be allowed to gently sink into oblivion. In summary: It's fast, it's furious it's f***in' good fun. Teams of 20 topplers posted on this thread or PM'd to MPFC will be collected into a masterlist to provide a carnival of carnage, the counting of which goes live in the first second of 2025. Points aplenty pour into the scoreboard until someone snags the stupendous total of 2025, at which point the event that used to be the fastest deadpool in common useage (until MPFC started something faster!) slams on the brakes and the lucky winner is duly given metaphorical back-slaps and allowed to claim a prize worth about a tenner (though tradition thus far dictates this turns into a charitable donation)*. Closing date for entries is midnight on 30 December 2024.

The tonnage of talent, the mass of imminent mortality, the deluge of the due to decease, the plethora of potential pushing daisies it'll be.... The Masterlist!

This'll be the list of the lost, then. Currently presided (heh heh) over by someone who lost in 1980, two people are vying for the honour of replacing him on 6 November! And, let's have a look at the old scoreboard!

Just a guess, this thread went quiet the second the potential posters realised pub beer is going down in price!

Nurse, NURSE!!!!!

He's smiling, not sure he'd agree

Could swear THIS is Donny, if it is I'd say it's a change of career direction that does feel significant

Bit subtle for Sickipedia so I thought I'd redeploy it here: A word of advice: If you run a cat shelter, never let Schroedinger adopt one.

At 37, so in Nigel Mansell territory regarding his age as a winning "rookie," then.

More or less, though lately some who feel strong Puerto Rican identity seem to be having second thoughts!

An absolute legend who could ooze sexuality and aloof humour effortlessly. Oh aye, and...biased as fuck because I love the movie but I think she's superb as the put upon Ronnie Neary in Close Encounters of the Third Kind

So, just checking for dead pooling purposes - Joanne Arnold (94 in April) is the first surviving playmate (i.e. all those ahead of her appearance in May 1954 are dead), right? Was tempted to say she's the first one you could still legally "play" with, but thought better of it! https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Joanne_Arnold

Impressive - two promotions off Conference South, just looking at Google Earth on that even the Maidstone supporters' coach would likely be setting off around 6am to allow for pub time.

Labour had just over 52% in July, Reform second on just over 18% - totally agree, if it gets anywhere close to a Reform gain that'd be a story. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Runcorn_and_Helsby_(UK_Parliament_constituency)

Vale Park 1962, according to the caption it had on FB!