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Content Count
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Days Won
77
Everything posted by Lord Fellatio Nelson
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There are so many jokes lurking in there that one scarcely knows where to begin. Oh you know EXACTLY where to begin Toastie!!
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Yes it's knit-pick night. Nowhere in that obit (I read it twice) does it suggest that Suzanne was an actress, on the contrary ('she shunned the limelight'h Ahh but Wiki (http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Suzanne_Farrington) does mention she was a 'British actress', but lists nothing beyond that. The only on screen appearance mentioned was Vivian holding her up to a camera as an infant. Wiki goes on to say Suzanne studied in hopes of being an actress, but those dreams would go unfulfilled (she appeared on what in essence was a school play) and later unwanted. I suspect you wrote that Wiki entry as well as the post herein, and lay claim to Suzanne Farrington as an actress (Brit or otherwise). SC That'd be 'nit-pick' . If you are insulting him its 'nit-prick'
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Those "one make" car forums. Full of people that know loads of stuff but when you post up something for help/advice nobody knows fuck all. Im rebuilding the drivers seat of my 87 Mercedes and im now stuffed because the tilt adjust/headrest adjustment knob ( that's KNOB not a cock Lardy) doesn't seem to want to come off. Do I prise it off? Do I break it while doing so? Is there a hidden screw somewhere? I post for advice yesterday afternoon and over 200 views and absolutely fuck all advice forthcoming. Bollocks!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Ok, anybody know how to remove it? No? C**ts!
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Irate Visitors Rage Here, If You Must.
Lord Fellatio Nelson replied to The Yeti's topic in DeathList Forum
Tell you what, I will buy the round of drinks if you can use that edit button to edit yourself off of the fucking forum. -
Nice to see that you are still on the go too.
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Any chance you can just fuck off?
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Fuck me, you will shag anything!!!!
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I see, favouritism eh? Well let me tell you RA I got Louis Jourdan on the nose one week before he was on't telly in Octopussy. Did I get any extra points for that bit of skill? No. I demand a recount!!
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242 posts and a fair percentage are fucking whinges. Shut the fuck up, the forum has been this way for years, or fuck off. Nobody is forcing you to remain.
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But you do get all the best jobs and better pay.... ...oh wait. At least you get into clubs for free on a Friday night whereas us blokes have to pay. On average women live a few years longer than geezers. I don't know how much fun those years are, living with faulty plumbing. regards, Hein I can't remember the last time I went into a club - it was probably about 3 years ago. It was full of pissed-up, middle-aged, mutton-dressed-as-spam slags looking to get fingered in the park on the way home......oh wait..... Fingered? You are in Wiltshire Lardy, that's going to be 14 fingers and retro Casio digital special going elbows in there. Anyway, while we are on the "oh woe is me coz I is a wimmin" bollocks, a woman at work has just given birth to her second child. Now how long has she got off for that then? How about ELEVEN MONTHS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Fuck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Come back and complain when you've squeezed a watermelon out of your jap's eye and had someone chewing on your nipples for six months straight, and have had no proper sleep for the last four months of your pregnancy because you're the size of a fucking airship and can't turn over in bed without help from the local fire brigade, and then no sleep for the next three years because your lazy ass twat of a husband pretends to be asleep every time the baby screams, and then the one and only time he DOES get up in the night to take the baby downstairs to feed her, he comes and wakes you up to tell you PRINCESS DIANA HAS FUCKING DIED. That's given me the right fucking 'orn!!!
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But you do get all the best jobs and better pay.... ...oh wait. At least you get into clubs for free on a Friday night whereas us blokes have to pay. On average women live a few years longer than geezers. I don't know how much fun those years are, living with faulty plumbing. regards, Hein I can't remember the last time I went into a club - it was probably about 3 years ago. It was full of pissed-up, middle-aged, mutton-dressed-as-spam slags looking to get fingered in the park on the way home......oh wait..... Fingered? You are in Wiltshire Lardy, that's going to be 14 fingers and retro Casio digital special going elbows in there. Anyway, while we are on the "oh woe is me coz I is a wimmin" bollocks, a woman at work has just given birth to her second child. Now how long has she got off for that then? How about ELEVEN MONTHS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Fuck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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How unfair!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 7 measley points for managing to get my first hit from the bottom of my list TWO years on the trot!!!! That's a unique skill R.A, I would have expected an additional bonus for managing to do that!!!
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I had him. R.A, points please!
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Hadn't noticed that I'd changed to become edgier, I'll ask the missus for a reality check once her handcuffs are off and her gag is out. Before your time we used to have Monkey awards for the best posts, threads and the like, I don't recall we ever rated edginess or identified a forum leader in that dept. It's not been used in nearly five years. Indeed, and I wasn't suggesting we revive it. Wouldn't be a bad thing if we did. That used to be an enjoyable read once a year.
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Hadn't noticed that I'd changed to become edgier, I'll ask the missus for a reality check once her handcuffs are off and her gag is out. Before your time we used to have Monkey awards for the best posts, threads and the like, I don't recall we ever rated edginess or identified a forum leader in that dept. No I don't suppose ya did. Well, I'm not the one who brought the word into the consciousness here. And besides I wasn't after awards anyway... we all know winning Best Picture Oscar doesnt necessarily make a movie the best of that year does it. That's true, however it does virtually guarantee that the movie makes a shitload of money as being awarded the Best Picture tends to be an endorsement to pack in the audiences. To this end somebody nominating you as forum cunt of the year may well be the ringing endorsement that you most deserve.
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One of the very few times he has gone down and not headed mouth first towards a cock.
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DDP Team Name Rejects
Lord Fellatio Nelson replied to Deathray's topic in DeathList extra-curricular
Alcock and Brown - Well hung black Porno actors who are also historic aviation fans who die on the job or summat. -
Docter Docter!
Lord Fellatio Nelson replied to Banshees Scream's topic in DeathList extra-curricular
How come you're 'not willing to pick' people like her but you are willing to slag them off for "wasting" an incredibly relatively tiny amount of government money........? I don't see the connection. And anyway I can't see why it would cost £40,000 to nudge staff into introducing themselves. Surely an email would do the job. It's been a while since I regularly frequented hospitals, but staff used to wear name badges. Don't they do that any more? I find that as long as you know someone's name, there's no need for elaborate introductions - it just follows naturally. I was listening to Jeremy Vine this lunch time when this was one of the subjects of discussion. One lady spoke of having a Doctor come in and put his hand up her to check on her cervix, she was pregnant. She was duty bound to ask him if he actually worked in the fuggin Hospital!!! So, yeah, an introduction would have been good in that case. Hey, mebee I can pop up the road to my local Hospital, put on a white coat and fondle a few pairs of puppies. "Are you a Doctor"? "No luv, Ive come to fix the Hospital phone lines but while Im here........" -
Docter Docter!
Lord Fellatio Nelson replied to Banshees Scream's topic in DeathList extra-curricular
How come you're 'not willing to pick' people like her but you are willing to slag them off for "wasting" an incredibly relatively tiny amount of government money........? The Government doesn't have any money, its OUR fucking money. -
DDP Team Name Rejects
Lord Fellatio Nelson replied to Deathray's topic in DeathList extra-curricular
Lost for Words - a team of former countdown and scrabble champions That's the Spirit. Twat. -
DDP Team Name Rejects
Lord Fellatio Nelson replied to Deathray's topic in DeathList extra-curricular
Im truly lost for words -
DDP Team Name Rejects
Lord Fellatio Nelson replied to Deathray's topic in DeathList extra-curricular
This is a joke, right?? -
Even his name sounds like a crime. Lol, no it doesn't. Stig is the Swedish word for trail/path. Berg means mountain. Dunno the meaning of the -ling ending, but this is just an ordinary name here. Nothing weird about it, Toast. Yes but it sounds like burgling, a crime HERE!!!!! As for the lost opportunity of calling him Terd, perhaps we wont go there, eh? Mwahahaha!
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Go back one fackin page and read it!! Lol sorry, I used the search function and the last post there was from 2006 or something. But I must have confused it with the date the thread was created. Don't say sorry, im not a mod or DrZ or owt. Should have just told me to fuck off.
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Go back one fackin page and read it!!