Lord Fellatio Nelson

Need you say more? Of course you do! Was it the French Tickler or the 10inch Black Mamba?

Ladies and Gents, you know what? I think we have a candidate to take on the mantle of one (departed) Ivor "Oh look a thistle" Cutler. I feel that BS will fill the void left by said person as they are, clearly, very similar. There is a clear need for another self absorbed "eccentric" who writes utter shite and plays to a particular audience who believe that they are ( nudge, nudge, wink, wink, ITK.....) leaving the rest of us ignorant fools blind to this " Poet of the people." Well if its ok with you, I shall retain the visual capabilities of Stevie Wonder when it comes to reading the "Works" of one Banshees Scream. Thank You. PS: BS, its f*****...."G" PPS: BS, Pathos. It isnt somebody who plays wing back for Olympiacos...

I happen to believe, for my sins. Is their proof? Well bugger all is going to land on the Whitehouse lawn and declare "We come in peace" and IF its all true will anybody tell us? Will they f**k! So much has been written, reported, so much has been debunked and the debunkers have been debunked...which has then been debunked Personally, I stick to the principles of one Timothy Good and prefer to read of strange goings on ( or I used to before I got bored) on places like the PPrune website, a forum for professional pilots. Some of that made very interesting reading. Hard evidence? Well there is no hard evidence for the existence of God but I still believe in God. If you view God as a genial old beardy in a toga it seems somewhat Bertie Bo**ocks. If, however, your interpretation of the Almighty is a power/energy that is greater than mankind then it doesnt seem so bloody daft, does it?

Ford Capri axles. Utter bastards

There is no possibility that he can be human.

6/10 and every one was a guess, obviously my collection of '80's albums is slightly different from whoever set the quiz! Respect LG. 1/10 and I guessed that one. I'm sooooooo not there. I'm not losing it. I never had it! That makes me feel better. I got two and one was a guess 8. Worse still, hardly any of them were guesses 5 guesses out of 10. Next I will correctly guess next weeks lottery numbers PS: Nice to see you back on form BS, every forum needs its little corner of boll*cks and you are certainly boll*cks.

I think ATJ needs a pat on the back for not letting that gem disappear up its own fundament. I cant believe that thread was locked, since when has ANYBODY took any notice of BS?

I read this, then read it again, then again. Quality, sheer quality.

Okay, here's the spiel. I'm going through a rough period right now. I just lost my job. The boss commended me for my great performance and said that I've been a valuable contributor, but said that the company's had financial problems and they had to let me go b/c there's not enough in the budget to sustain extra help. He told me to pack my bags up and clean my desk by 11 am on the SAME DAY. I asked for a one month reprieve, but he told me to get out by 12 PM (he did grant me an extra hour). It f$%^ing sucks for me right now and I'm feeling low. I cheered for eliot Spitzer's downfall and I'm cheering for this country to fall into depression so they know what I'm going through right now. I sent my resumes to literally dozens of employers. I have a Master's degree, have sufficient work and computer experience, but nobody even wants to look at my resume. So yeah, I'm miserable at the moment. Thank you very much. Maybe that's why I'm looking forward to seeing another famous celebrity die or to witness the downfall of somebody famous like Spitzer. Schauenfreude is all I'm feeling right now. So you just left your job without a wimper. You should have kicked your boss in the b*llocks on your way out. PS: Sh*t posting is sh*t posting, no excuses here matey.

And why was it "crap" Mary? By all means bring all the circumstantial evidence to the table which proves beyond all reasonable doubt that it was bollocks.

Is he still alive then?

Craig Revel Horwood: 6 Arlene Phillips: 8 Len Goodman: 7 Bruno Tonioli: I'd give him 1 "I said bowl him some GOOGLIES........"

You are right Mary, he is the subject of this thread. The problem is the thread, for now, has run its natural course, you really cannot flog a dead horse. Mugabe is no more likely to die ( a bullet through the head excepted ) than any other fit (ish) octogenarian in the public eye. It could actually be said that his longevity will be greatly assisted by his vast wealth, diet and general standard of living, all the things that scum sucker has stolen from "his" people. This thread will only go the way of the Fidel one, "is he or isnt he, will he or wont he" which was as boring as f**k. Let it go man!

Monoclinic, before I was going to counter the description of the so called 'Rewards' .. I received and your post right here allows me to to speak my mind all the way. Restraint is none. Thank you for this. Now the most offensive term that I have been accused of is being a racist. In my life I've had black friends, and to tell you truth I support Obama for the next president of the United States. I believe on the highest level all people are equal. Illegal Immigration is a serious problem and it will only grow with the years to come. Fact. If for some reason you find my attitude racist towards them illegally invading my country: Then guess what? You are either politically misinformed or you have an IQ of 49. The problem is the people on this forum are irrationally sensative towards humor which either focuses on 'a race or state of being. I mean who are the people posting here? Do you all attend the 6 AM mass at the local Christian church? Really! What the f**k is going on here? Not that religion is a crime but due to the fact that people here are so sensative they are being led to false interpretations. Moni .. there is a difference between humor and a person who is dedicated to discrimination. That is exactly my point and believe it or not the people here cannot handle any humor which relates in that category. That is my style and I do it out of fun, not out of hate. What your saying is wrong and I'm making it my business to tell you. Now before I say anymore I realize how 'Off - Topic' (And unreasonably long this is) and maryportfuncity is absolutely right but this is a subject that needs to be discussed because to be perfectly honest it's been long overdue. People are getting the wrong message and it f****n aggravates me. Anyway I have no problem listening to what other people have to say. A good listener is also an open minded person. There is but one thing you said that made sense to me Monoclinic. One thing. I like myself. I believe in myself and you all should too. What is life if you wake up everyday and look in the mirror and say 'I hate myself and I hate who I am? What is life then? That's not healthy. If that's the case you need to find either a heavy dose of Prozac or Heroin - it's up to you. I've had hard times but I lived through it. I get better everyday ... like a fine wine. So basically to sum all this up: We need to change our standards and how we look at things in this place. Because if you don't: You are only deluding yourself. Hear me. You Sir are bringing the DL into disrepute. How dare you hijack such an important thread cultivated, meticulously I might add, by MPFC. Utterly disgraceful! PS: You talk bo**ocks too.

Hey BS, Two words You Twat.

Id like to say how touched I am, but I wont. Actually, im pretty amazed that our elite panel didnt consider it their duty to bestow a special " Going beyond the call of duty, how comes you havent slit your wrists" award to Mr Screams Therapist. It seems that not even the full might of the New York trick cyclist community can do anything to stop BS from being a complete fuckwitt.

YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

In advance of Sunday, K.O 3pm, "COME ON YOU SPURS!!!!!" Yours Yid Army

Smart to sign on as a guest....makes it more difficult for us to find you.... You can bet Allah's boots on it. I wasn't that guest poster but hey, I'll say it loud and proud; I love hearing about crashed USAF hardware. I hope as many of their warplanes crash as possible. It may reduce the appalling number of civilian casualties (sorry, "collateral damage") inflicted by them and their "smart bombs". Both pilots of this B-2 crash survived ejection, so all that was really lost was a $1.2bn evil instrument of death-delivery. I'd like to see it posted on youtube. Don't kid yourselves, despite overwhelming supporting propaganda, that the USAF are helping to deliver long-term peace and secure the "freedom" the world craves. All the USA is doing with its warplanes these days is clumsily scattering the fertile seeds of a multi-generational war that benefits nobody except shareholders in the companies that make the weapons. It pains me to see motivated, well-trained, professional service-people who could be deployed to do so much good in the world, being used as instruments of death and destruction in the name of a misguided administration with vested interests in the perpetuation of war. How do you like them apples? p.s. Back on-topic... this spy-satellite shooting-down incident; laughable, man!! For the first time, I find myself agreeing with raving crackpot, dangerously-paranoid-and-self-interested Russian dictator Vladimir "Pooty-Poot" Putin, in his assessment that this has more to do with testing missile defence and "star wars" systems than it does saving the people of the world from hydrazine toxicity. "Hydrazine Schmydrazine", as my New York counterpart might put it. Considering the number of satellites that use hydrazine, and the number that have previously come to earth pissing this stuff all over the place, and the number that will continue to do so in future, the only logical conclusion is US military self-interest. The administration is so used to lying, it can't even tell the truth when everyone else can see it as plain as day. Reminds me of the UK government. And it's all connected, see... this, the military-industrial complex, the oil industry, the grassy knoll, Majestic 12, Ingo Swann, the Illuminati, Area 51, Black Helicopters, Whitewater, Bluewater, Watergate, Lightwater Valley, Billy-Ray Cyrus, Walmart, the NTSB, Phillip Morris and the KKK, Skull & Bones, and don't get me started on the blah blah blah rant rant rant... That was almost a good post, almost.

Ladies and Gentleman, I give you the one and only Erica Roe! Not so much Fifteen Minutes of fame, more like 40 Inches of fame. Always good for a trip down Mammary Lane is our Erica.

I think this is another form of mass hysteria. Too many, all within a close range of ages and many had never previously shown any inclination to take their own life. Unless the cycle is broken there will be more.

Lets not forget that our loyal Monarchy ( only here to serve us, gawd bless em) did employ, for many years, a total bastard of a spy. Who was that LFN? "Sir" Anthony Blunt. Ok he was only looking after the Paintings and the like but you can see where I was going In view of this, I would suggest Winnys assertion that, because Phil da Greek was "on our side" during the War and he couldnt possibly have been a Nazi too, does look a bit Billy Bo**ocks in the cold light of day. They are all at it. PS: Godot, I think I need a bit of artistic licence on this one!

....and exactly how would the Sultan of Brunei have known any money was missing, does he actually read his bank statements? Pure theatre today. I do like Al fayed, I know i shouldnt but I do. He is probably 90% right, well Phil the Greek is a racist, and Im sure the Royal family would have loved the boys to have had a Halibut stepfather....... Lets not forget that our loyal Monarchy ( only here to serve us, gawd bless em) did employ, for many years, a total bastard of a spy. Which proves that all things are possible, and with our Royal Family, probable.

Joey Dunlop??? Benny Hill? I do hope the question marks next to Benny Hill are a "Waddya mean, Benny Hill is a significant death!" as opposed to "Whos Benny Hill?"

The problem is, generally speaking, Cricket is sh*t. Nobody gives a stuff about it until we all get to hear that we are doing so brilliantly that we may actually win something. It goes into the same pot as Rugby Union, we all take to the streets when we win something, up until then we dont care. Englands latest disaster hasnt even made page twenty something, most of us dont even know we are on tour and, consequently, we care not. Im afraid the English like big round balls, which is why our Football Terraces are pretty healthy in terms of bodies and our Cricket grounds resemble morgues without the ambiance. Well done anyway