Lord Fellatio Nelson

I really should have trained to be a Therapist. Im sure I could have brought my own kind of expertise to the Profession. I do, occassionally, allow myself the fantasy that I am offering therapy to some poor tortured soul. I see myself in a magnificent office, with my hands wrapped around said souls neck, shaking them violently as I tell them "Pull youself together, you f*****g Idiot!" Id find that a highly pleasurable way ( Im too old and ugly to be a Gigolo) of making some serious money. I took the wrong fork in the road, didnt I.

Cant be anything to do with us, it says the typical audience is "more educated". That cant be right.

The word is Heffy is impotent, unsuprising really when you consider he has spent over half a century surrounded by half naked bimbos who would shag him for a photoshoot ( think WAG wanabee 1968). Consequently, is it any wonder that, at the ripe old age of 82, there aint much left for him to get a stiffy to? I would guess that a surrogate Sperm donor ( or a set of jump leads, to jump start his gonads off of a young fit male) may be the only way, short of immaculate conception, he will be called Daddy again.

See, you really couldnt make it up.

I was so hoping that somebody had borrowed a clucking great JCB to dig one mother of a hole to bury, what has to be, the shitiest thread on DL. Alas it was not to be.

Take a look at this link Handy, http://www.bob-block-scriptwriter.co.uk/. It still seems to be under construction, however, it gives you a pretty good idea that he is getting on in years. Rentaghost was one of my all time favourite kids shows, It still makes me giggle now...then again im just a big kid.

He will probably end up as McCain's VP candidate. Given the fact that McCain is 71, Romney might be the one cashing in his chips half way through a McCain presidency... Then again - maybe not. You mean as in "McCain Oven Chips?"

Spot on. Oh my God! Somebody agrees with BS. I now know for certain that the World truly is f*****g bonkers.

Im giving up bugger all. It seems that most things that are bad for you are highly enjoyable, yes they may kill you in the process ( ask Michael Hutchence/Jimi Hendrix ) but do we all want to live to be 100, miserable, bored and souless? Sod that.

I find it very odd that Ted Kennedy switching sides ( I believe he actually endorsed Bill Clintons campaign ) should give Obamas campaign the boost it has. Lets be honest here, Ted Kennedy is not and never has been JFK has he. JFK was a Political giant, his indescretions forgiven because he was, well, JFK. Ted Kennedy, had he not been a Kennedy, would have been a no mark. His impact as a Politician has never been bigger than his surname, a man who was never bought to book over Chappaquiddick, thanks to his surname, etc, etc. TBH, I think Clinton and Obama are too smary by half, yet, I think the next President will be one of these two.

Handy, what that would have meant, possibly, is that things may not have been as shitty, Gordon Brown wouldnt have been Chancellor who wouldnt have been Prime Minister, something he is utter shite at. Gordon Browns facial tic is peeing me off big time too. Aye me too. You'd agree that John Smith's death was significant though. Also 25 years since Karen Carpenter's death and people still care, well I do anyway. The death of John Smith, for better or worse, reshaped the Political landscape of this Country ( my view only ) so, yes, his death was highly significant. Karen Carpenters death was the ultimate "tragic waste of a life". My younger years were spent listening to the Carpenters and Dusty Springfield, my mum was a huge fan. Karen Carpenters death was terrible, I can remember hearing it on the Radio after a night out on the sauce. Yes I care. I also used to get rocked to sleep to the LPs of one Dionne Warwick. Me Mums got style

Ive missed all this, how utterly enthralling!

I have just Googled Rachel Aziani. My oh my, she is a big girl, isnt she!! I bet shes got a bigger milk round than the Co op.

Im not too hopeful that the astrophysicists would be able to provide an answer. The Pioneer 10 space probe, launched in 1972, is, apparently slowing down as it reaches the furthest corners of our Solar system, nobody understands why, however, it may mean a comprehensive rewrite of the laws of Physics. The timescales we work to appear not to work in outer space. PS: If somebody out there can correct me, I believe that the Voyger probe, launched later ( 1973?) has actually travelled further than Pioneer 10, I assume its travelled another route?

Handy, what that would have meant, possibly, is that things may not have been as shitty, Gordon Brown wouldnt have been Chancellor who wouldnt have been Prime Minister, something he is utter shite at. Gordon Browns facial tic is peeing me off big time too.

I saw bits and pieces of that Documentary, so, so sad. He will certainly be gone by the end of the year.

If we assume that the Russians, in those early days, were merely figuring out the mechanics of Space flight, would it be fair to suggest that the first living being, from this planet to be thrust out beyond our solar system was actually the Dog Laika, gawd bless er. A most upsetting end for a pioneering Pup.

I think SC has been worrying too many Sheep, he clearly is not as razor sharp as he used to be. I do not, however, see any reason for Stephen Hawking not to have a collection of Nike trainers. He can afford them and he has two feet. The fact that he no longer uses said feet is completely irrelevant. Because he can no longer walk doesnt mean that he doesnt wear trousers, does it.

Poor show, quoting one's self, but although, unfortunately, the game didn't go quite like the video, there was a few similarities. Both Tottenham Hotspur teams (on video and at Old Trafford) had a player sent off, and both Manchester United teams scored from a penalty. I also fully approve with the lack of prejudice shown by both the Manchester United teams in playing two what appear to be pre-op transsexuals. If you're good, you're good. Dave, dear fellow, you have class!

Unlike you and the majority of registered pillocks on this site, I do not believe I am my said screen name which I dare say you will have put many hours of thought into, what with having no life, girlfriend etc - hence the obsession with death. Go get some fresh air you pasty faced limp wristed geek ha ha! A devastating put-down that suggests the spirit of Beadle will never die. Save your breath dude - you will need it to blow up your date - You are a precociously repulsive fiend and a repugnant, orgasm faking practitioner of bestiality - in my correct and humble opinion..... It intrigues me that whenever random pond-life interject their thoughts on this site their derogatory remarks always gravitate towards a lack of love-action which must be afflicting their antagonists. It is always possible that they are quite wrong, and that their fixation with such interactivity merely reflects their own lack of success in this department. Spaeak fopr yourself, hjt... If I had 20p for every time i've come too quickly in ansheep... (sh*t, i''l regret this in the morniong) .....and there was me thinking you were just a Goat shagger.

Im not too sure how anybody within the Acting business cannot be, deep down, a teensy weensy bit conceited. Here was a chap, already burdened with the moniker "Heath Ledger" FFS, who jobs his way across Aussie land, knocking on doors trying to get the big break ( whats wrong with fringe Theatre if all you want to do is act) and ends up in Sodom and Gomorrah ( LA and New York to you and me) clearly unable to handle all that fame and fortune he so obviously craved to start with. A bit OTT for me, he wasnt that good, just young.

R Dean Taylor is the main man!

CP, I dont doubt what you say, yes you cannot please all of the people all of the time. The point I was alluding to, tongue somewhat in cheek, was that, despite many good solid suggestions for the 2008 DL, the usual tired old fossils have been wheeled out. Phantom, as you know, a few names were bandied about last year, people quite a bit younger and somewhat closer to their maker than they ought to be. A suicidal Britney, Amy "Crackhouse" Winehouse, Lindsey unstable Lohan were just three names that COULD have been thrown into the melting pot. It wouldnt have hurt, it would have covered all bases and made the whole point of DL, perhaps more relevent, a sort of social commentary, if you like. So far, we aint even out of January and two picks already, two very old, tired men. The thing is, its all a bit safe, DL, and, God im no expert on the subject, seems to be a little bit stuck in the 80s. With a cosmopolitan patronage should come a more cosmopolitan DL, a tad more youthful, a tad more relevent to the younger DL'er. Think of it as a kind of loss leader, like the supermarkets have, some names to get new blood through the door of Deathlist 2008. Just my opinion.

Im going for Mimi von Scrotumscratcher. 98 years old, kidneys fecked, heart on its last legs, would be an inspired DL pick for 2009!!

Kudos to Deathlist?! You mean, well done to DL for picking an 87 year old Bastard whos actually been dead for the last year or so anyway? Kudos? No Bone Idle? Yes