Lord Fellatio Nelson

Not sure who to go for, so I will follow the DL committee by being original, incisive, challenging and sporting.......and go pick another half dead Octogenarian

Well she clearly stated previously that they tried to make her go to rehab and she said "No, No, No". She is quite clearly a two faced ( and the 1st face is ugly enough) liar with the willpower of a nympho at an orgy ( says me craving for a ciggy) What with all this publicity, has she a new album out soon?

Yes I know its a bit late in the day to respond to the very kind Birthday wishes, however, I would just like to say a big thank you for your kind greetings. Just had my Broadband wired up at the Exchange yesterday ( well I did it myself, or it would have been Thursday ) and got the old computer fired up today. It has to be said, after being without the net for what seems like forever, Id rather loose a testicle than my Internet connection. Its good to be back. Regards A happy LFN.

I wish you all health, wealth and happiness. I am very glad to get this year over and done with. It has been difficult and stressful. A house move later this week will see the end of all the shite and, I hope, the true beginning of a new year for the FN household. To those I met this year, I had a great time and you were all far too nice!!! To those I have yet to meet, hope to see some of you in 2008 on another DL p*ss up. Best wishes everbody From the ( quite nice really) LFN

You and "offensive" just dont go together. You are a lovely fella. Take the b'stards to the cleaners Best wishes LFN.

Leg off, for me please, just like my christmas goose! Her stump is maybe quite sensitive; an additional zone of erogenous pleasure? I think the plastic leg would be quite unromantic, I like my women "au naturelle", as they say in Japan. Plus, it may enable new and exciting positions to be tried. Sideways is a popular position in Europe, maybe not so for British people who don't like sex so much as us. Also, it make it difficult for Heather to run away if I am not pleasing her. I think British "News"papers are horrible to her. If Paul Macartney is stupid enough not to sign the pre-nuptuel agreement which Heather offered him, it is his fault for being, as my flatmate tell me, "a surprisingly naive, craggy-faced scouse C-word whose luck and money should have run out years ago." I think Heather Mills is a beautiful, kind-hearted woman, and I was surprised to see her ever talking to a wizened, cash-obsessed old shitbag like "Macca". 1: Heather Mills is a one legged, money grabbing slag. 2: I wouldnt slip the hampton of BS up her, let alone my own. 3: Change your Flatmate. You need their opinion like an Orgy needs syphilis. 4: Britain died years ago. We are either English, Scottish, Sheep shaggers or Irish. Therefore, as a collective, we enjoy sex just as much as any other national....and we are pretty damn good at it too. 5: If you believe that the hag is "beautiful" then you have let your mask slip. You are David Blunkett, arent you.

Before we can discuss this, you need to attend our panel discussion on search engines. Oh, I dont think it would hurt to discuss this now, Im sure the mods will do what they do to get this merged up to the previous discussion. He is fat, has been dining off of one brilliant album for 29/30 years and he is to fitness what Adolf was to race relations. I think he will be around for a while yet tho. By the way welcome Besty.

Then again, it could be a case of "We are paying you to work, not to twat about on a f*****g computer all day surfing shite." This is a sentiment shared by a whole plethora of UK companies, the bastards that they are.

Why? Is there something you're not telling us? eeerm ......He is playing Alderman Fitzwarren in Dick Whittington this year? Will that suffice? He is also getting on a tad Getting on a bit? He's only 63 I guess you must be around that age too then. Now that wasnt the greatest move you will ever make As for a "Where are they now?" quest, I can save you much time and effort. They are either: a) Dead or z) Appearing at their local Soup kitchen ( assuming that Stannah have finally managed to procure the talents of Mr "Police Stop!" Alistair Stewart) Hope this helps Yours LFN

Why? Is there something you're not telling us? OK, how about *Frazer Hines (born 22 September 1944, Horsforth, Leeds, Yorkshire) is a British actor best known for his roles as Jamie McCrimmon in the BBC science fiction television series Doctor Who, and Joe Sugden in Emmerdale. At the age of eight, after studying acting at the Corona Stage Academy, he made his acting debut. He was thirteen when he appeared in Charlie Chaplin's A King in New York (1957) and by the age of fifteen, he had appeared in six films. In 1960 he appeared in the eight-part serial The Young Jacobites. His television roles included Jan in The Silver Sword (1957-8), Tim Birch in Emergency Ward 10 (1963-4), and Roger Wain in Coronation Street (1965). In Doctor Who he played the part of Jamie McCrimmon, a companion of the Second Doctor, from 1966 to 1969 as well as reappearing in The Five Doctors (1983) and The Two Doctors (1985). Though much of his work on Doctor Who has been lost, he appeared in more episodes than any other actor, save for those playing the first four Doctors. In terms of screen-time, he is easily the longest-serving co-star, although Nicholas Courtney appeared regularly over a greater number of years. This phenomenon is due to the fact that during the 1960s, the show had a much higher episode count than in the 1970s and 1980s. After his three-year stint as Jamie in Doctor Who he resumed the life of a jobbing actor until 1972, when he was cast in the soap opera Emmerdale Farm as Joe Sugden — a role he played until 1994. In between making episodes of Emmerdale, as it was renamed in the 1980's, he has continued a career in the theatre and made occasional appearances in other TV shows Nothing much else to discuss then * taken from wiki Thats the problem with Wiki, all those words when all it needed was four. He is a twat.

Have to agree with you LG, Monoclinic is a superb writer and its a pleasure to read her posts. Havent thought too much about the rest of the catagories, I lack the mental capacity to multi task, so Lady FN tells me.... I have got as far as "Avatar of the Year", however, and my choice has to be The Pooka and his very good Jason King impersonation. It seems that time,fashion and a small matter of a Gross indecency conviction after playing "Hunt the sausage" in Gloucester Bus station in 1975 has done little to dent the coolness of Jason King/Peter Wyngarde.

Fellatio Nelson you have clearly been under the wrong influences. Being twenty five, it's improbable that you are going to meet the standards most deadpoolers play for. It's that simple. I can see from your view point but this is more of a game that is based around production, rather then just a list filled with young reality TV stars who don't wear seat belts and who check into rehab routinely so they can get on page 2 in the big magazine. If that is how you would play it, that's a different game. I have nothing against that game, but the so called comparison 'in so many words' that you just made is like comparing 'chess and checkers' for example. That may well be all true BS. Look at it this way, what would be the more skillful pick, Britney Spears or Ernest Borgnine? One is living life recklessly, the other is very old indeed. Had the hard drinking Lee Marvin been alive now and about 65 would he be a candidate? Probably. Why, not because of his age but because his liver would, sooner rather than later give out. Its not about comparing Chess with checkers its about picking people who you think will snuff it within the year. Age isnt THE issue, lifestyle, medical history and sheer recklessness are equally important. In view of the above, I see no reason why age is a primary reason for a pick. Thats all.

Is that the "Have your say, and they will completely ignore you" rule change idea? I suppose its a bit naughty of me to comment, I dont really play, BUT its pretty obvious that picking old fossils or dead certs, excuse the pun, is hardly "sporting." Go for more 20 somethings!

I don't have a TV but I happened to be in front of a set last December 31st and saw a New Year interview with the Archbish in which he talked about his cancer having returned, albeit in a non-aggressive manner - hence my inclusion of him in one of my lists for this year. If that is a recent picture of him in the article quoted above, he has certainly lost some weight since the beginning of the year. An article in this weeks Spectator magazine describes Archibishop Tutu as "gravely ill", without elaborating further. I think he's going to kick Peter O'Toole out of 20th place on my DDP team. Cant you find more of a total barsteward to add to your list? The Bish is far too nice to be considered. A great man.

None offered HCW, although, I believe, his Grandfather was Scottish. Just thought, it bloody would be with a surname of Carson!

Not too sure about Rats milk but I know id rather drink rats p*ss than get stuck in a lift with that old trollop. Since when did anybody with a brain cell think that a bunch of lentil eating beardies ( and thats just the women ) fronted by one of the most despised human beings since Pol Pot could possibly influence us into trapping rats, milking them ( how the f**k do you milk a rat?) and pouring the contents onto your Rice Krispies? The woman is insane, barmy, mental, moronic and very rich.

Yeah, as a matter of fact I do. But then when I get out to the office and someone comes in chuckling because they've just ordered some slabs of sizzling Scots sod slicers, raising money for Leukemia, I think 'I'll post that on the DL.' I can honestly say that I have NEVER seen pubic hair that thick before. No wonder they dont need to wear anything under their kilts.

Do you get out often MPFC?

Two stupid bloody goals!!!! Thats all that kept you from drinking the bars of Austria and Switzerland dry. A financial catastrophe for those two nations. No Ginger wigs, Kilts, gurning into cameras, no Rab C Nesbitt impersonators. No nothing. Instead we MAY ( dependant on result) have the pleasure of seeing England supporters belting out " Eng-er-land" while honking up everywhere, spending vast sums on the local Toms and picking fights with all and sundry. Never mind.

For somebody who was doing nobody any harm behind closed and locked doors, he got a pretty rough deal I find. Not quite true NAP. The bicycle is currently undergoing counseling.

Oh, just thought. Was this chap Straight, Gay or Bicyclexual?

At least it wasnt a Goat.

I saw him on the TV, just before I left for work. Good God!!! He has lost 10 stone ( mostly off of his face, by the look of it) and if it wasnt for the beard and the 1970s Footballers haircut, you would not believe it was him. Fair play to the fella.

Aside from Churchill, as a Wartime Prime Minister, have we ever had a decent Post War PM? Jimmy Carter may well have been a nice guy but a poorish President but look who we had at the time. James "Crisis, what crisis?" Callaghan. I rest my case.

I would very much like the Scots to make it, I think they can. This is not a sentiment that is generally reciprocated! As for the wild celebrations, should your valiant soldiers pull off the once unthinkable, would this be an excuse for you, LG and the Bear to lose another week, what with all that booze you will both consume?