DevonDeathTrip

Lord Attenborough is still in hospital recovering from the fall that he suffered last year. His agent says he's "doing fine"...

Spanish cyclist David Cañada, 33, is suffering from melanoma.

You didn't wager your new tractor perchance? No, but I could probably go and buy a new combine harvester with my winnings.

Weymouth FC were forced to field their youth team at the weekend, having lost all of of their other players after not paying their wages. They were beaten 9-0 at home by Rushden and Diamonds. I'm not proud of it, but I placed a very, very large wager on them losing the match (I won't say how much, because Mrs DDT reads DL sometimes) at 13-8. Looks like I wasn't the only one http://www.bournemouthecho.co.uk/news/4146...team_walks_out/

Michael Jackson "Feels The End Is Near"

Play the new generation of urine-stream-controlled video games. Not to be confused with the Wii

UK obit for Harry Hill, from The Sun.

Wrestling legend Verne Gagne, 82, now suffers from Alzheimer's disease and is living in a nursing home. He is currently in the news as he is suspected to have killed his 97 year old room mate, a fellow Alzheimer's sufferer, by throwing him to the floor...

Another day, another dead bassist - Kelly Groucutt of the Electric Light Orchestra , has died aged 63.

Steve Dullaghan, bassist and songwriter with eighties indie band The Primitives, has died. They had a hit with "Crash" which made it to number five in the charts.

The Guardian think that Gerry Rafferty is "living in hiding in the south of England, being cared for by a friend" http://www.guardian.co.uk/music/2009/feb/1...ferty-in-hiding

Auditors. I have just spent two long, long days being audited by some tw@t who I'm sure wants me out of a job, demanding to see paperwork I've never completed or binned and cynically questioning just about everything I've done or haven't done over the last twelve months. My conscience is clear, but he was the sort of man who'd give a saint a guilt complex. I'm certain he would have been genuinely happy if he'd unearthed something that would have got me fired. I'm not a violent man, but if another auditor walked in right now, I'd rip his f@cking head off. Thanks for listening. I'm going to relax now with some intoxicating substances. The bastard drove me to it.

Sir Bernard Ashley, co-founder of the fashion firm named after his wife Laura Ashley, has died aged 82.

Rabbi Lionel Blue, 79, was on Radio 4's "Thought For The Day" slot this morning. He was bemoaning his poor health and said he's been in and out of hospital recently, he went on to wonder if he would reach his eightieth birthday and enjoy the extra 25p a week this would give him on his state pension.

Tempus Fugit. No doubt about. Can't see it myself. I'm sure Raskolnikov is new and if I were him, I'd be slightly freaked out by all of this nonsense.

Amy Winehouse is in hospital again.

Update on her cancer chances here.

Of course he'll get an obit, because I left him off my team thinking that he wouldn't. Just like I left Sir Dai off my team thinking that he wouldn't die. I just think he'll die this year, he was only diagnosed nine months ago and bladder cancer takes quite a while to kick in. It's much nearer to prostate than pancreas on the "good to bad cancer scale for deadpoolers" He'll probably drop dead tomorrow now I've said that.

Jack Cover, the scientist who invented the Taser stun gun and, er, the electric toothbrush, has died at the age of 88.

Emilio Massera, 83, who was prominent leader of Argentina's 1976-1983 military junta, has been hospitalised with heart problems. By an odd co-incidence, last week he was deemed healthy enough to face extradition for the alleged kidnapping, torture and disappearance of three Italians during the dictatorship.

I say bring back caves and burn the CERN When we reap the downside of nanotechnology and nuclear weapons, as one day we surely will, the human race will tire of all this progress and The Great Simplification will dawn. When that day comes, Mono and her learned friends will be burned at the stake to save the rest of us from spagettification, or something even worse.

A horse for our kingdom? I predict that chavs will do something horrible to the giant stallion, or someone will fall off it and die.

Michael Jackson has an antibiotic resistant flesh eating superbug, allegedly

Update on Dunne's health.

Former New York Mets baseball star Roberto Alomar is suffering from full blown AIDS according to his ex girlfriend, who is suing him for having unprotected sex with her.