maryportfuncity 10,673 Posted December 4, 2010 Reet, so we're preparing the ground for a full-on sprint to the Deathrace title and an attempt on the world record of victory in 35 days. Whaddya mean you were planning to get round to it? Ten teams, including two 'Dirty Dozen' line ups made the start. Teams Bt – Bert Trautmann ch – Captain Chorizo ds – Deadsox dd – Devon Death Trip lb – Lard Bazaar mp – MPFC pp – Paul the Postie’s Soon to be Toasties ra – Rotten Ali ti – Time wt – Windsor the Troll Scoreboard Devon Death Trip - 2017 MPFC - 1998 Bert Trautmann - 1301 Deadsox - 1291 Windsor the Troll - 681 Paul the Postie - 665 Captain Chorizo - 363 Rotten Ali - 304 Please Captain Mainwaring sir, I'd like to volunteer to gift the winning points to one brave deathlister! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
maryportfuncity 10,673 Posted December 4, 2010 And you will know us by the trail of dead 2 Jan: Anne Francis - cc - 363pts 4 Jan: Mick Karn – dd, ds* - 361 9 Jan: Tom Lubbock – dd, mp* - 356 15 Jan: Nat Lofthouse – dd, mp - 350 18 Jan: Sargent Shriver – wt - 347 26 Jan: Charlie Louvin - dd - 339 31: Eunice Sanborn – mp, pp, wt - 334 4 Feb: Neil Young – bt*, pp - 331 4 Feb: John Higgins Snr – bt, dd - 331 27 Feb: Frankie Buckles – bt, mp - 308 2 Mar: Ruby Muhammad - ra - 304 12 Mar: Margaret Fish – mp - 294 17 Mar: Ferlin Husky - ds - 289 26 Mar: Diana Wynne Jones – dd, ds - 280 Could this grave be an omen...FEARNE Cotton to snuff it in 2011? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
maryportfuncity 10,673 Posted December 4, 2010 Masterlist King Abdullah Bin Abdulaziz – cc Colette Adams - dd Jose Alencar – dd, ra*, wt Lauren Bacall - cc John Bardon – ti Pope Benedict – pp Chuck Berry - cc Ronnie Biggs – bt, ra, wt Tony Book – ti Stefano Borgonovo - cc Walter Breuning – wt Katie Brickell – ds Dora Bryan – ds, ti Frankie Buckles – bt, mp Sid Caesar - pp David Cameron – pp Elliott Carter – ra Dick Cheney – mp Claude Choules – mp, ra David Crosby - lb Kathryn Crosby – wt Liz Dawn - cc Doris Day – lb John Demjanjuk – pp, wt Leila Denmark - ra Pete Doherty – lb Sara Douglass - dd Basil D'Oliveira – ti Fats Domino - cc Kirk Douglas – bt Michael Douglas – ds, mp Clive Dunn – wt Charles Durning - cc Robert Edwards – mp Harlan Elison – mp, wt Archbishop Faustino Sainz Muñoz - dd Margaret Fish – mp Danny Fiszman - dd Alex Forbes – cc Bryan Forbes - cc Emile Ford – ti Anne Francis - cc Aretha Franklin – dd, ds, mp, pp, wt Dennis Frederiksen – ds, mp Annette Funicello – ds Zsa Zsa Gabor – cc, ds, lb, mp, pp, ra, wt* Paul Gascoigne – pp John Glenn – ti Elvis Gordon - dd Eydie Gorme - ds Billy Graham – bt, cc Sir Eldon Wylie Griffiths - Sports Minister, Heath Government – ti* Gerald Harper – ti Olivia De Havilland – cc Brian Haw - dd Stephen Hawking – wt Liam Hayes (Irish Footballer) - ds Johannes Heesters – bt, cc John Higgins Snr – bt, dd Christopher Hitchins – bt, dd, mp, pp Delores Hope – ra, wt Geoffrey Hughes – lb, mp, pp*, wt Ferlin Husky - ds Katherine Jackson - lb Chris Jefferies - lb Kim Jong Il – bt, lb Mick Karn – dd, ds* Lee Kerslake – mp Ayatollah Ali Khameini - ds Mansoor Ali Khan – ti Rosie Kilburn - ds Robbie Knievel - pp Artie Lange – lb Carla Laemmle – lb Francoise Larribe (French al Qaeda hostage) - ds Nat Lofthouse – dd, mp Charlie Louvin - dd Tom Lubbock – dd, mp* Penny Marshall – ds, mp, pp Paul Mason - pp Francis Matthews – ti Dr Ann McPherson – dd* Al Megrahi – cc*, dd, ds, lb, wt Sheila Mercier - ti Dom Mintoff – ds, wt Eleanor Mondale – lb, wt Patrick Moore – bt Cliff Morgan – pp Oswald Morris – cc Ruby Muhammad - ra Pete Murray - ti Asil Nadir – ti Anthony Nicklinson – lb* Oscar Niemeyer – bt Brian O’Connor - dd Peter O'Sullevan - pp Peter O'Toole – cc, lb, ti I M Pei – ti Jim Perrin – pp Lester Piggott - pp Nosher Powell – ti Steve Prescott – mp Nancy Reagan – lb Guy Roxburghe - ds Eunice Sanborn – mp, pp, wt Yitzak Shamir - ra Ariel Sharon - ra Sargent Shriver – wt Rev Fred Shuttlesworth - ra Dudley Simpson – ti Lianne Smith – mp Norman Spinrad - dd Alfredo Di Stéfano - cc Eric Sykes – lb Jim Stynes - dd Margaret Thatcher – cc, ds, lb, pp, ra, ti Bert Trautmann – mp Dick van Dyke – bt, wt Anna Wing – lb, pp, wi Sir Nicholas Winton – wt Norrie Woodhall – lb Peter Wyngarde - Jason King – ti Diana Wynne Jones – dd, ds Jimmy Young – pp, ti Neil Young – bt*, pp Franz...he made the Deathliszt in 1886! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
maryportfuncity 10,673 Posted December 4, 2010 DEATHRACE 2011: THE RULES 1 – The object of the Deathrace is to be the first contestant to reach 2011 points. 2 – To enter the Deathrace a contestant must have A: A valid and current DDP team or a Deathrace Dirty Dozen team. B: Status as a member of the Deathlist (i.e. be at least a Pointless Ranter and at most Brain Dead) Or…..successfully argue a case to MPFC for entry without the above. 3 – Entries are open until midnight on 31 December. A team will be deemed to have entered when they post a full DDP team and the name of their DDP team on the Deathrace thread on the Deathlist. Or A special ‘Deathrace Dirty Dozen’ (DDD) line-up concocted specifically for the Deathrace comprising 12 members conspicuous as ‘low hanging fruit’ of the variety beloved of dead poolers. Including one of the Dirty Dozen nominated as a joker and a suitable grimly funny team name for the DDD 4 – Players score points every time a team member dies and accrues an obit (see point 9). The score for each death amounts to 1 point for every complete calendar day of 2011 remaining after the death of said team member. So, a death on January 1st scores 364 points, a death on January 2nd scores 363 points etc. 5 – Jokers score double the normal points in point 4 above. 6 – The winner is the first player to reach or exceed 2011 points. 7 – In the event that a single death pushes more than one player beyond the victory score the winner will be deemed to be the player with the highest overall score. 8 – In the event that a single death pushes more than one player beyond the victory score and a tie remains between the winners, a sudden death play-off will ensue between all potential winners. 8a – The sudden death play off involves all possible winners waiting until one player scores another death of a team member. Said player will then be declared the winner. The sudden death play off will continue until a single clear winner emerges. 9 - For the purposes of the Deathrace the same rules about eligibility of team members apply as apply in the DDP, which is obvious anyway cos we’ve been using those rules from the start of the Deathrace competitions. 10 – ‘Obit’ in the context of the Deathrace means any report from a reliable news source in English. In this context the following are admissable: ‘Newspaper obits, national newspaper reports, local newspaper reports, coverage in trade journals or similar specialist publications. In all cases evidence online from these sources is sufficient to count for an ‘obit’ for scoring purposes. In the event of a debate about a ‘reliable news source’ MPFC’s decision is final. But he is very reasonable and quite likely to award points to the lowest hanging fruit. 11 – To qualify for points all team members must be alive on January 1st 2011 or qualify for the Raymond Hewlett Memorial Exemption (RHME) 11a – In honour of everyone’s favourite Maddie-implicated paedo-scum the Deathrace operates a policy of awarding 365 points to any candidate widely believed to be alive on 1 January and subsequently discovered to have been deceased when the pool opened. To qualify for such a bonus said candidate must be reported dead in the year of the competition. In the event that an obit counting news report adhering to Deathrace qualification for points is subsequently discovered to have been published before the commencement of the Deathrace all points for the candidate are voided. 11b – In the event of disputes over rule 11a MPFC’s decision is final, but may be appealed by anyone attending a DLCon and supplying MPFC with foaming ale whilst appealing. The decision won’t be changed but MPFC will greatly enjoy the free beer. 12 – If any team is found to have used Deathlist editing options to subtly change the line up of their squad instant disqualification without appeal will follow and MPFC will not be held responsible for any abuse heaped upon said cheat by other posters. 13 – The winner will receive a prize as follows: A: Should the winner attend the next DLCon MPFC will personally offer a single measure of an alcoholic drink of choice (beer/wine or spirit) along with much back patting and hearty congratulations. B: If A is not possible MPFC will offer an item from his extensive collection of duplicate Carlisle United merchandise kindly donated by relatives who forget he already owns said books, scarves or pork pie hat. C: If option B proves unattractive MPFC may be suggestible, via PMs, to offer summat more suitable. Other General Stuff 1 – After the closing date MPFC will post a masterlist of entries. 2 – The masterlist will be updated at least every ten days and a scoreboard will appear until such time as a winner is declared. 3 – On declaration of a winner MPFC will seek to get the thread closed and offer hearty thanks to DL admins for their tolerance. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bert Trautmann 58 Posted December 5, 2010 Would I be able to enter a team with some different names to my DDP team, or would the 20 names have to be identical? Just because there'll be a few younger names on my DDP, but there's no age advantage in the Deathrace so I'd probably replace them with your Heester or Niemeyer types if that was allowed. EDIT: Ignore me I just re-read number three...tempting to go with a specific Deathrace team just to avoid people nicking my DDP ideas Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
maryportfuncity 10,673 Posted December 28, 2010 Hmmm, a slow trickle...two teams entered so far. PMs, Facebook messages etc will all do. Hoping to put the masterlist up for end of business 1st Jan, or the following day at the latest. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Rotten Ali 600 Posted December 31, 2010 <---- My dirty dozen team has been submitted. Jose Alencar Ronnie Biggs Elliot Carter Claude Choules Leila Denmark Zsa Zsa Gabor Dolores Hope Ruby Muhammad Ariel Sharon Yitzhak Shamir Rev Fred Shuttlesworth Margaret Thatcher Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
maryportfuncity 10,673 Posted January 1, 2011 Reet, we're up and running. Listed below are the ten teams who entered, so if I made any mistakes the evidence will be in this post to correct them. Two dirty dozens, eight 'normal' teams and some interesting picking. Let's beat the 35 day record, or summat. Rotten Ali Jose Alencar Ronnie Biggs Elliot Carter Claude Choules Leila Denmark Zsa Zsa Gabor Dolores Hope Ruby Muhammad Ariel Sharon Yitzhak Shamir Rev Fred Shuttlesworth Margaret Thatcher DDT – LIVING END 1) Dr Ann McPherson - Joker 2) Abdelbaset Al-megrahi 3) Archbishop Faustino Sainz Muñoz 4) Norman Spinrad 5) Tom Lubbock 6) Sara Douglass 7) Colette Adams 8) Charlie Louvin 9) Danny Fiszman 10) John Higgins Snr 11) Mick Karn 12) Jim Stynes 13) Brian Haw 14) Christopher Hitchens 15) Jose Alencar 16) Diana Wynne Jones 17) Brian O'Connor 18) Aretha Franklin 19) Elvis Gordon 20) Nat Lofthouse Sub: Natty Brooker Capt Chorizo Adelbaset al-Megrahi Liz Dawn ***If my joker dies before Dec 31 my alt Joker Chuck Berry Johannes Heesters Stefano Borgonovo Margaret Thatcher Oswald Morris Billy Graham Anne Francis Olivia DeHavilland Alfredo Di Stéfano Charles Durning Fats Domino Alex Forbes-Ex Arsenal/Scotland Footballer Bryan Forbes -Film Director King Rat Peter O'Toole King Abdullah Bin Abdulaziz Lauren Bacall Zsa Zsa Gabor Sid Caesar Deadsox 1. Mick Karn (Joker) 2. Michael Douglas 3. Zsa Zsa Gabor 4. Abdelbaset al Megrahi 5. Penny Marshall 6. Annette Funicello 7. Eydie Gorme 8. Katie Brickell 9. Guy Roxburghe 10. Dom Mintoff 11. Francoise Larribe (French al Qaeda hostage) 12. Dennis Frederiksen 13. Diana Wynne Jones 14. Ayatollah Ali Khameini 15. Dora Bryan 16. Liam Hayes (Irish Footballer) 17. Aretha Franklin 18. Ferlin Husky 19. Margaret Thatcher 20. Rosie Kilburn Sub #1 Kristin Hallenga Sub #2 Charlie Louvin Sub #3 Ronnie Biggs Bert Trautmann 1. Neil Young (Joker) (Former Manchester City footballer, not the singer) 2. Christopher Hitchens 3. Johannes Heesters 4. Oscar Niemeyer 5. Billy Graham 6. Patrick Moore 7. Kirk Douglas 8. Frank Buckles 9. John Higgins Snr. 10. Dick Van Dyke 11. Ronnie Biggs 12. Kim Jong-Il Sub: Jerry Lewis Time 1 Sir Eldon Wylie Griffiths - Sports Minister, Heath Government 2 John Bardon - EastEnder 3 Asil Nadir - Fugitive 4 Sheila Mercier - Emmerdaler 5 Gerald Harper - Adam Adamant (Dies) 6 Dudley Simpson - Composer (Dr Who etc) 7 Peter Wyngarde - Jason King 8 Margaret Thatcher - Spawn of Satan 9 Peter O'Toole - Actor 10 Emile Ford - Singer, with the Checkmates 11 Pete Murray - DJ 12 Tony Book - Footballer, Manchester City Manager 13 Mansoor Ali Khan - Indian Cricket Captain, 9th Nawab of Pataudi 14 Dora Bryan - Actress 15 I M Pei - Architect 16 John Glenn - Astronaut 17 Nosher Powell - Hardman/Stuntman 18 Jimmy Young - DJ 19 Basil D'Oliveira - Cricketer 20 Francis Matthews - Captain Scarlet Sub1 'Ginger' McCain - Racehorse Trainer Sub2 Peter O'Sullevan - Racing Commentator Sub3 Lord 'Dickie' Attenbrough - Film Luvvie This is my 'regular' DDP team; it probably stands a better chance of scoring more hits than my theme team (though if 2010 is anything to go by. MPFC Tom Lubbock – terminally ill journalist (JOKER) Lianne Smith – Infanticidal and suicidal Frankie Buckles Christopher Hitchins Dick Cheney Nat Lofthouse Claude Choules Eunice Sanborn – World’s oldest Geoffrey Hughes – Actor (Eddie Yates) Steve Prescott – Rugby Union star – terminally ill Margaret Fish – UK’s oldest Penny Marshall – Director of Big Lee Kerslake – Drummer, Uriah Heep Bert Trautmann Dennis Frederiksen – terminally ill Toto singer. Robert Edwards: Nobel Laureate Michael Douglas Harlan Ellison Zsa Zsa Gabor Aretha Franklin Subs bench Billy Graham Paul the Postie etc Geoffrey Hughes * Paul Mason Paul Gascoigne Robbie Knievel Penny Marshall John Demjanjuk David Cameron Zsa Zsa Gabor Christopher Hitchens Jim Perrin Neil Young – Man City legend Peter O'Sullevan Aretha Franklin Cliff Morgan Lester Piggott Margaret Thatcher Jimmy Young Anna Wing Pope Benedict Eunice Sandborn Subs bench Dennis Healy Lardy Anthony Nicklinson (suffers from Locked-In Syndrome, from Melksham, Wiltshire, wants to be assisted to die) Zsa Zsa Gabor Abdelbaset al Megrahi Eric Sykes Geoffrey Hughes (actor) Kim Jong-il Aretha Franklin Margaret Thatcher David Crosby Peter O'Toole Artie Lange Nancy Reagan Doris Day Pete Doherty Chris Jefferies (arrested on suspicion of the murder of Joanna Yeates in Bristol) Carla Laemmle Anna Wing Norrie Woodhall Eleanor Mondale Katherine Jackson Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bert Trautmann 58 Posted January 1, 2011 Gutted! I was hoping Neil Young was going to slip by everyone and be a unique pick on the DDP, damn you Paul the Postie (and probably several others)! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
maryportfuncity 10,673 Posted January 1, 2011 Paul's team were a couple of weeks ahead of the other entries, so you might still get the result you want from Neil "Nelly" Young, since I reckon he's probably a better joker than their pick of Geoffrey "Eddie Yeates" Hughes. Elsewhere some VERY interesting picks, Lardy's last-minute appropriation of the prime suspect in the Joanna Yeates murder might prove to be an inspired choice. I've high hopes for Lianne Smith and I notice I'm not alone in seeing potential in Tom Lubbock. TBH I had to compile the last minute entries whilst slightly hung over this morning, so I didn't take time to check out the background on some of the names I don't recognise. I'm assuming everyone picked is still alive and - therefore - the subs benches will remain fully stocked, if anyone knows different, please post it here. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
maryportfuncity 10,673 Posted January 3, 2011 An early lead for Captain Chorizo, 363 points ahead of everyone else at the moment. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Windsor 2,235 Posted January 4, 2011 My team seems to be missing from the above list: Teamname: Windsor the Troll 1. Zsa Zsa Gabor (Joker) 2. Dom Mintoff 3. Sir Nicholas Winton 4. Eunice Sanborn 5. Walter Breuning 6. Dick van Dyke 7. Harlan Elison 8. Eleanor Mondale 9. Al Megrahi 10. Aretha Franklin 11. Geoffrey Hughes 12. Kathryn Cosby 13. Clive Dunn 14. Stephen Hawking 15. Sargent Shriver 16. Ronnie Biggs 17. John Demjanjuk 18. Delores Hope 19. Jose Alencar 20. Anna Wing Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
The Unknown Man 592 Posted January 4, 2011 My team seems to be missing from the above list: Teamname: Windsor the Troll 1. Zsa Zsa Gabor (Joker) 2. Dom Mintoff 3. Sir Nicholas Winton 4. Eunice Sanborn 5. Walter Breuning 6. Dick van Dyke 7. Harlan Elison 8. Eleanor Mondale 9. Al Megrahi 10. Aretha Franklin 11. Geoffrey Hughes 12. Kathryn Cosby 13. Clive Dunn 14. Stephen Hawking 15. Sargent Shriver 16. Ronnie Biggs 17. John Demjanjuk 18. Delores Hope 19. Jose Alencar 20. Anna Wing Yeah, mine too. The End of the World as we Know it Abdelbaset Al-Megrahi Ronnie Biggs Fidel Castro Michael Douglas Aretha Franklin (Joker) Annette Funicello Zsa Zsa Gabor Ruth Bader Ginsburg Rev. Billy Graham Christopher Hitchens Geoffrey Hughes Etta James Barbara Kent Penny Marshall Isabel Peron Helmut Schmidt Yitzhak Shamir Ariel Sharon Elizabeth Taylor Margaret Thatcher Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bert Trautmann 58 Posted January 4, 2011 Looks like no-one got Mr. Rafferty Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
maryportfuncity 10,673 Posted January 4, 2011 Aye, a big miss. I'm kicking myself because - as you'll see on his thread - I had him fingered as a surefire faller. Be sure to score well on the DDP, mind. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
maryportfuncity 10,673 Posted January 10, 2011 We rang top TV host Derek Batey to provide expert analysis on the current scores, he said: "It looks like a stormer after last-year's fiasco. Ten days gone and three teams already over a third of the way to a winning total, two jokers cashed. I shall speak to my agent immediately about hosting a TV version." Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
maryportfuncity 10,673 Posted January 27, 2011 Dr Ann McPherson says: After 26 days it looks like DDT is performing a Devon Death Sprint, he's got more points in less than four weeks than anyone managed in the whole of last year. Obviously, I'm honoured to be his joker and very conscious that I could gift him the points for a winning score today. But, the sheer excitement and tension of this pulsating dead pool...kind of...makes me want to hang on a little longer. Scoreboard Devon Death Trip - 1406 MPFC - 1062 Deadsox - 722 Captain Chorizo - 363 Windsor the Troll - 347 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
maryportfuncity 10,673 Posted February 4, 2011 Scoreboard Devon Death Trip - 1737 MPFC - 1396 Bert Trautmann - 993 Deadsox - 722 Windsor the Troll - 681 Paul the Postie - 665 Captain Chorizo - 363 Trautmann celebrates with impressionable youngsters having netted 993 points in one day for the double whammy of Neil Young and John Higgins Snr. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bert Trautmann 58 Posted February 4, 2011 Scoreboard Devon Death Trip - 1737 MPFC - 1396 Bert Trautmann - 993 Deadsox - 722 Windsor the Troll - 681 Paul the Postie - 665 Captain Chorizo - 363 Trautmann celebrates with impressionable youngsters having netted 993 points in one day for the double whammy of Neil Young and John Higgins Snr. Bert would be proud! I think I'm unlikely to catch up with DDT though, especially given I picked a Deathrace Dirty Dozen and only have 10 left, I'm relying on Mr. Buckles to pop off soon... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
time 8,655 Posted February 4, 2011 Meanwhile, I'm using the deathrace as a dry run for Spade's inverse deadpool, in which, I believe, I'm joint leader. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Spade_Cooley 9,601 Posted February 4, 2011 You've made a strong start, for sure. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
maryportfuncity 10,673 Posted February 28, 2011 Trautmann: I got Buckles too...I tell you kids, I can take this Deathrace. Kids: Shut up and show us yer cock you old fool! Scoreboard Devon Death Trip - 1737 MPFC - 1704 Bert Trautmann - 1301 Deadsox - 722 Windsor the Troll - 681 Paul the Postie - 665 Captain Chorizo - 363 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
maryportfuncity 10,673 Posted March 26, 2011 Result!! News of DDT's victory spreads quickly in the local community. Diana Wynn Jones seals it for DDT after a close and determined race. The winner will be now be contacted and discussions on a suitable prize will ensue. The final standings in full: Devon Death Trip - 2017 MPFC - 1998 Bert Trautmann - 1301 Deadsox - 1291 Windsor the Troll - 681 Paul the Postie - 665 Captain Chorizo - 363 Rotten Ali - 304 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
maryportfuncity 10,673 Posted March 27, 2011 What a man that DDT is. In place of a prize he requested a donation to the Adam Stransfield Foundation. Duly done and dusted. A good cause, and a truly selfless gesture from our esteemed Deathrace champion. Business may well be resumed with Deathrace 2012 in nine months time. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
