dead Robbie Coltrane

[sidburyman 15]

Perhaps a good candidate for impending bucket-kicking is that overweight Scottish thespian Mr Robbie Coltrane. Robbie has always looked rather unhealthy, but in recent years his colour has been a little grey. I believe he's also a smoker who's had a lifetimes worth of lack of exercise and overindulgence. Add that to the dangerous middle age stage in his life and surely you get an an outside chance for pegging out next year? Comments anyone?.....

[Grim Reaper 186]

Interesting thinking but Robbie Coltrane really has to be a long shot - hes only 53 and no reports of actual ill health that I am aware of.

 

The following link: http://www.show.scot.nhs.uk/scottishhealth...y/sh802-27.html suggests Coltrane's health profile isnt that out of the ordinary.

 

Any other thoughts?

[Guest Guest_sidburyman]

Well, I said I thought Robbie was an outside chance. He's definately one to watch though. Those Scots are just queuing up to die in droves. What about Sean Connery from an overdose of cash?

[Guest Robbie Coltrane]

I am very unhappy that you think I am going to die soon, I only smoke around 75 cigarettes a day and eat twice my body weight in food, although I am partial to a wee 6 - 12 bottles of scotch and brandy oh and vodka and diet coke a week. So as you see I have diet coke to be on the healthy side, because there is too much sugar in normal coke.

[Josco 49]

Robbie

 

Is that really you? You look less imposing than I imagined, accents different too.

[Teddy 21]

With the references to cigarettes and whiskey, I think it may be Charles Kennedy in disguise

[weatherman90 7]

Robbie, Would it be possible for you to let us know when you arent feeling so good, then we could stick you on real quick.

[Tuber Mirum 125]

I hate to cast aspersions on the authenticity of our two other Scottish posters, but most Scottish people I know don't call whisky "scotch" and they don't spell it "whiskey".

 

Perhaps if we could just sneak a wee peek under your kilts, to be sure.....

[The Four Horsemen 26]

You can tell the difference between Scotsmen and other Men by looking under their kilts? I'm worried!

[Anubis the Jackal 77]

Of course! with Scotsmen, there's nothing worn under the kilt.

 

Hwagh Hwagh Hwagh.

 

(Carry On Up The Khyber I believe)

[Tuber Mirum 125]

Indeed, Private Widdle! And if you take a look, you can tell a true McDonald by his Quarter Pounder.

[Guest Guest_IXION]

scottish people are allowed to practice transvestism

[Captain Oates 21]

Of course! with Scotsmen, there's nothing worn under the kilt.

 

Hwagh Hwagh Hwagh.

 

(Carry On Up The Khyber I believe)

No, Madam, I assure you everything is in perfect working order.

[Anubis the Jackal 77]

scottish people are allowed to practice transvestism

they practise it, but they never quite get it right.

[Typhoid Harry 23]

Of course! with Scotsmen, there's nothing much to look at under the kilt.

 

Hwagh Hwagh Hwagh.

 

(Carry On Up The Khyber I believe)

Why, Anubis, how cheeky of you.

[Teddy 21]

I hate to cast aspersions on the authenticity of our two other Scottish posters, but most Scottish people I know don't call whisky "scotch" and they don't spell it "whiskey".

 

Perhaps if we could just sneak a wee peek under your kilts, to be sure.....

I could aways have edited my post - but I will hold up my hands and blame my poor typing. I don't know where that 'e' came from - must be something to do with my Irish grand-parents

 

Anyway, can't stay long. The snows are starting to melt, and I must hunt some haggis for next week.

[Paul Bearer 6,101]

Anyway, can't stay long. The snows are starting to melt, and I must hunt some haggis for next week.

 

Bag me one when you release yourself from the snow & ice....... around about a half pounder if you can. I know the hunting season is almost over but if you can't trap one, it wont really matter too much.

[The Yeti 14]

So what's a baby haggis called ?

Or a flock of haggis ?

 

PS Cooking Tips

Hunting Tips

[Tuber Mirum 125]

The truth is worse still:

 

Take a sheep's pluck (i.e. lights, liver and heart), and clean thoroughly. Make cuts in the liver and heart to let out the blood, and parboil the whole, letting the windpipe hang over the side of the pot to allow blood &c., to escape from the lungs. Boil for half an hour. Mince finely together the heart, half of the liver, and part of the lights, after trimming away the skins and black-looking parts. Add a pound of minced beef suet, the other half of the liver grated, three or four large onions, peeled, scalded, and minced, and mix well. Add a large breakfast-cupfull of oatmeal, toasted to a light brown colour, with a mixed seasoning of black pepper, salt and cayenne pepper, and mix the whole well together.

 

Take a sheep's stomach, wash thoroughly in cold water, plunge into boiling water, and scrape it clean. Stuff the stomach with the minced meat, after adding to it half a pint of the liquor in which the pluck was boiled, or good beef gravy. Do not fill the bag more than three-quarters full to allow for swelling of the contents; add a little vinegar or the juice of a lemon; press out the air, and sew up the bag; and boil slowly for about three hours. Prick the bag with a darning-needle when it first swells to prevent bursting. If the bag is thin, tie it in a cloth. Place a plate in the bottom of the pot to prevent the bag from sticking to the pot. Serve hot.

 

 

(From Herbert Jenkins' "Apply Within About Everything" (1932) (Lifted directly from Mrs. Beeteon))

 

 

Anyone know where I can get a darning needle?

 

Next week we will learn how to make doner.

[Mortician 2]

Next week we will learn how to make doner.

Fly to India

Find elephant

Cut off its foot

Stick on spike

Gently warm until rotten

Wait for pubs to close

[Tuber Mirum 125]

This seems as good a place as any to wish all those of the haggis-eating persuasion a pleasant evening and an easy time of it in the morning.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

His folks a' deid an' awa' lang syne-

In case his memory we should tyne,

Whistle this tune tae keep ye in min'

At the muckin' o' Geordie's byre-

[Anubis the Jackal 77]

This seems as good a place as any to wish all those of the haggis-eating persuasion a pleasant evening and an easy time of it in the morning.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

His folks a' deid an' awa' lang syne-

In case his memory we should tyne,

Whistle this tune tae keep ye in min'

At the muckin' o' Geordie's byre-

Fair fa' your honest, sonsie face,

 

Great chieftain o' the puddin-race!

 

Aboon them a' ye tak your place,

 

Painch, tripe, or thairm:

 

Weel are ye wordy of a grace worthy

 

As lang's my arm.

 

 

Care to translate notapotato?

[Typhoid Harry 23]

Drunk driving test in Scotland?

[Tuber Mirum 125]

Fair fa' your honest, sonsie face,

 

Great chieftain o' the puddin-race!

 

Aboon them a' ye tak your place,

 

Painch, tripe, or thairm:

 

Weel are ye wordy of a grace worthy

 

As lang's my arm.

 

 

Care to translate notapotato?

Which bits don't you understand. Seems plain enough to me.

 

Except the word "worthy" at the end of the second last line, which shouldn't be there.

And (I think, can't check at the moment) the last two words should be "ma airm"

 

That's probably why you had trouble understanding it.

[Guest rubeus_hp]

Are anyone of you a big fan of robbie?¿?¿?¿ you mustn't say that things of the best scottish actor in the world. I have to say that he is too fat and he smokes too, but i think he can't read this comments, but i give him most of my supports, waiting he live many years from this moment, as a big fan of his person i am.

 

nearly his birthday 30th march: 55

 

congratulations champion!!!!

 

bye from spain!!!!

 

George

 

Edited March 14, 2005 by honez