Death Watch Beatle 40 Posted September 15, 2005 Follow this link to the Salford City Council website: http://www.salford.gov.uk/living/bmd/death...ive-coffins.htm Here those very kind people at the Civic Centre give you instructions on how to build your own coffin, or perhaps you would like to consider one of their suggested alternatives. Bamboo coffin anyone? DWB Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lady Die 63 Posted September 15, 2005 "Instructions to make your own coffin The coffin should be made, using exact measurements for the deceased person" I think they need to supply more info here. Exactly what measurements are needed? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
DevonDeathTrip 2,294 Posted September 15, 2005 Follow this link to the Salford City Council website Will you get 5 cents if I do? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Death Watch Beatle 40 Posted September 15, 2005 Yep, they've promised me as much gold as I can eat. DWB Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Harvester Of Souls 40 Posted September 15, 2005 I've contacted this council. I've ordered some of their branded refuse bags. When my time comes I'm going to be wrapped in said bags and then dumped in a canal of my choosing. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Death Watch Beatle 40 Posted September 15, 2005 Does it come with bricks or do you have to supply your own? DWB Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Harvester Of Souls 40 Posted September 15, 2005 Does it come with bricks or do you have to supply your own? DWB It didn't say in the pamphlet. I was thinking of a light concrete mix around the feet? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Mr Magoo Posted September 15, 2005 No explosive object to be placed in the DIY coffin, ie. coconuts? Suicide bombers take note, you wont get away with it twice! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lady Grendel 138 Posted September 20, 2005 No explosive object to be placed in the DIY coffin, ie. coconuts? Suicide bombers take note, you wont get away with it twice! I would love to know how they found out about coconuts being explosive!!! There must be a good story in there somewhere (and why would you want to be buried with a coconut???!!!) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Mr Magoo Posted September 21, 2005 It's all to do with build up of gas as they decay, I know the feeling Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
VileBody 11 Posted September 21, 2005 It's all to do with build up of gas as they decay, I know the feeling I think it's about them exploding inside crematoria....apparently the Germans discovered the problem during the little-reported liquidation of the Polynesian Ghetto in Budapest in November 1943 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Anubis the Jackal 76 Posted September 21, 2005 (and why would you want to be buried with a coconut???!!!) I now want to be buried inside a giant coconut, or entombed in one and pushed out to sea to drift the currents and tides. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
VileBody 11 Posted September 21, 2005 It's all to do with build up of gas as they decay, I know the feeling I think it's about them exploding inside crematoria....apparently the Germans discovered the problem during the little-reported liquidation of the Polynesian Ghetto in Budapest in November 1943 According to recent research by the Tuno'vuatu Holocaust Centre in Fiji, approximately two Polynesians (one clutching a bag of coconuts) were rounded up in wide sweeps of the city in what later passed into infamy as the "The Night of the Palm Leaves". The victims were herded into a small Volkswagen and driven off never to be heard of again. The only clue to their fate lies in a copy of an invoice uncovered in 1996 in the archives of Raus, Schnell & Achtung Gmbh, a supplier of bespoke interior brickwork, plumbing and ornamental garden features in the Munich area. The firm saw a marked increase in profits in the middle years of the war apparently due to an upsurge in Government work in the locality following the construction of a number of "refugee facilities". The "invoice" is a barely discernible handwriitten note: "Hptn K, To clearing obstruction and re-rendering d'mgd area ins'd of No3 "Pottery Kiln" (!) [sic]. RM 350. NB D'mg caused by explsn in the "kiln" and blckg to drain by pieces of fibrous shell. Suggest review gdlines for opr'tion with mnfctur" The authenticity and significance of the so-called "Munich Death-invoice" has, of course, been widely questioned since its discovery. In particular, Huamasuatu, the militant protest group which has accused Fiji of repression of the Tongan minority in the region, describes it as further evidence of the "Big Lie". The group claims that in fact only one Polynesian was the victim of Nazi oppression when he was "given a funny look" by an Waffen SS tank commander outside Warsaw in the spring of 1944. They also point to the difficulty of obtaining fresh coconuts in occupied Hungary in 1943. Tony Blair has condemned the group's comments and given their leader a knighthood. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Anubis the Jackal 76 Posted September 21, 2005 It's all to do with build up of gas as they decay, I know the feeling I think it's about them exploding inside crematoria....apparently the Germans discovered the problem during the little-reported liquidation of the Polynesian Ghetto in Budapest in November 1943 Which of course leads to Pastor Niemoller's often mis-translated quote... First they came for the Papua New Guineansand I did not speak out because I was not a Papua New Guinean. Then they came for the Bora Borans and I did not speak out because I was not a Bora Boran. Then they came for the Cook Islanders and I did not speak out because I was not a Cook Islanders. Then they came for me and there was no one left to speak out for me. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
VileBody 11 Posted September 21, 2005 Absolutely - BTW I love your new "title".... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Anubis the Jackal 76 Posted September 21, 2005 Absolutely - BTW I love your new "title".... A badge I will wear with pride. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Magere Hein 1,397 Posted September 21, 2005 Absolutely - BTW I love your new "title".... A badge I will wear with pride. I see you've made some extra space on your avatar for that badge. regards, Hein Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Star Crossed 33 Posted September 21, 2005 Apologies if this is duplication of anyone's effort but Anubis, is your new Avatar a reference to the people of Hartlepool and their previous naval injustices? They all look alike to me Edited by me to remove needless quote. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Slave to the Grave 22 Posted October 14, 2005 How about freeze drying and grinding to dust? , an environmentally friendly alternative to cremation apparently. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest UderLord Posted October 14, 2005 Ok what is your prefered method of disposal of your own earthly remains ? I need to be cremated then scattered in Weymouth bay by 24 lap danceres singing "Smack your bitch up". Should we start a new thread or just go for a poll ? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Harvester Of Souls 40 Posted October 14, 2005 Ok what is your prefered method of disposal of your own earthly remains ? I need to be cremated then scattered in Weymouth bay by 24 lap danceres singing "Smack your bitch up". Should we start a new thread or just go for a poll ? As I said above. Bin liners, concrete around the ankles and then dumped in the nearest canal. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Harvester Of Souls 40 Posted October 14, 2005 Have some consideration, some poor sods have to dredge those canals. Not a very nice surprise for them, bringing up your bloated corpse. I've already considered them. A DL bhoy as a marker. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
