TQR 14,350 Posted August 19, 2022 Ryan Giggs is the new Crap Poet Laureate, with his love poems dedicated to Kate Greville off of his court case. Item 1: Now, I do not have ovaries. But if I did, they’d have cringed and dried up. Item 2: “L is for legs” ”L is for legs” damn nearly finished me off 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Grim Up North 3,716 Posted August 19, 2022 15 minutes ago, TQR said: Ryan Giggs is the new Crap Poet Laureate, with his love poems dedicated to Kate Greville off of his court case. Item 1: Now, I do not have ovaries. But if I did, they’d have cringed and dried up. Item 2: “L is for legs” ”L is for legs” damn nearly finished me off I'm very tempted to post a true shocker I wrote to Mrs GUN around 30 years ago when we'd just got married. However I will retain my dignity. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TQR 14,350 Posted September 6, 2022 This is a poem which is by no means crap, but from the genius that is Brian Bilston: A bollard. A thimble. A beef gravy granule. A bilge pump. A plectrum. A Pokémon annual. A doorknob. A chaffinch. A half-eaten carrot. A footbath. A clothes peg. A wine stain. John Parrot. A ceramic spoon holder. A fruit Polo mint. A discarded tissue. A puddle. Some lint. A used toner cartridge. Some musical socks. A build up of silt. A stuffed startled fox. A plimsoll. A wingnut. A set of false teeth. A novelty wall clock with the face of Prue Leith. A beetle. A drumlin. A short piece of string. A packet of Wotsits. A plant pot. Most things. That was a poem entitled An Incomplete List of Things More Capable of Running the Country than the new Prime Minister. 1 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bibliogryphon 9,494 Posted September 6, 2022 24 minutes ago, TQR said: This is a poem which is by no means crap, but from the genius that is Brian Bilston: A bollard. A thimble. A beef gravy granule. A bilge pump. A plectrum. A Pokémon annual. A doorknob. A chaffinch. A half-eaten carrot. A footbath. A clothes peg. A wine stain. John Parrot. A ceramic spoon holder. A fruit Polo mint. A discarded tissue. A puddle. Some lint. A used toner cartridge. Some musical socks. A build up of silt. A stuffed startled fox. A plimsoll. A wingnut. A set of false teeth. A novelty wall clock with the face of Prue Leith. A beetle. A drumlin. A short piece of string. A packet of Wotsits. A plant pot. Most things. That was a poem entitled An Incomplete List of Things More Capable of Running the Country than the new Prime Minister. I was also tempted to post this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Grim Up North 3,716 Posted September 6, 2022 56 minutes ago, TQR said: This is a poem which is by no means crap, but from the genius that is Brian Bilston: A bollard. A thimble. A beef gravy granule. A bilge pump. A plectrum. A Pokémon annual. A doorknob. A chaffinch. A half-eaten carrot. A footbath. A clothes peg. A wine stain. John Parrot. A ceramic spoon holder. A fruit Polo mint. A discarded tissue. A puddle. Some lint. A used toner cartridge. Some musical socks. A build up of silt. A stuffed startled fox. A plimsoll. A wingnut. A set of false teeth. A novelty wall clock with the face of Prue Leith. A beetle. A drumlin. A short piece of string. A packet of Wotsits. A plant pot. Most things. That was a poem entitled An Incomplete List of Things More Capable of Running the Country than the new Prime Minister. Rishi Sunak must feel REALLY shit reading that 1 6 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
time 8,548 Posted September 9, 2022 If I see that mawkish poem on social media any more I may not be responsible for my actions (same goes for pictures of Phil waiting halfway up the stairs). 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Summer in Transylvania 2,130 Posted September 11, 2022 Remember remember, Eleven September, Aircraft, Buildings and BOOM! Skyscrapers fell, Bush, Jr. did tell The nation bin Laden was doomed. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TQR 14,350 Posted May 16, 2023 Another bit of Brian Bilston brilliance: ”Sometimes the power of a homophone will come out of nowhere and just hit you - like being struck by a ten-tonne truck,” articulated Laurie. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TQR 14,350 Posted July 17, 2023 Not everyone will get this one. 3 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TQR 14,350 Posted March 15 Lovely Facebook poem on 30p Lee: Spoiler It's an acrostic Update: 30p really appreciated it 1 4 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites