Dear Abby...

[themaninblack 2,112]

Dear Abby (who ever you are),

 

I feel like this thread should be in the DeathList extra-curricular,

 

What should I do?

Ask your friendly moderator.

 

Regards,

Hein

 

 

Welcome back!

[Lord Fellatio Nelson 6,218]

Dear Abby

 

At university our Philosophy lecturer informed us rather pompously that the only real human taboos involved sex and death. He soon changed his mind when I crept up as his back was turned and took a sh*t on his chair. Do you have any bright ideas of what I say in my forthcoming appeal against exclusion?

Firstly, I think you would have been better trying push his stool in.

Secondly, you should get him to qualify whether he meant the taboos were sex and death (that is sex leading to death D. Caradine-style), or sex and death (necrophiliac-style), or sex and death (coitus followed by an indeterminate time frame, followed by expiration). Each of these would lead to very different philosophical debates.

Also, sex could refer to gender, so again, depending on the level of pomposity, you could debate this at length, especially how the word sex immediately leads to Freudian interpretations, not gender.

 

You could also enter into an equally vacuous, yet completely valid discourse on the definition of death. In some cultures, this is brain death (Mr Sharon is therefore dead), physician-declared (or Belgian PM-declared) death, one-year MIA declared death, etc.

 

Any of the above may deflect the philosophical argument tangentially far enough to absolve you of said turd placement and the ultimate philosophical underpinnings inherent in the act of juxtaposing the supposedly taboo social memes of sex, death, and now, public excreta.

Honez

Can you translate that into English for me?

[honez 79]

Dear Abby

 

At university our Philosophy lecturer informed us rather pompously that the only real human taboos involved sex and death. He soon changed his mind when I crept up as his back was turned and took a sh*t on his chair. Do you have any bright ideas of what I say in my forthcoming appeal against exclusion?

Firstly, I think you would have been better trying push his stool in.

Secondly, you should get him to qualify whether he meant the taboos were sex and death (that is sex leading to death D. Caradine-style), or sex and death (necrophiliac-style), or sex and death (coitus followed by an indeterminate time frame, followed by expiration). Each of these would lead to very different philosophical debates.

Also, sex could refer to gender, so again, depending on the level of pomposity, you could debate this at length, especially how the word sex immediately leads to Freudian interpretations, not gender.

 

You could also enter into an equally vacuous, yet completely valid discourse on the definition of death. In some cultures, this is brain death (Mr Sharon is therefore dead), physician-declared (or Belgian PM-declared) death, one-year MIA declared death, etc.

 

Any of the above may deflect the philosophical argument tangentially far enough to absolve you of said turd placement and the ultimate philosophical underpinnings inherent in the act of juxtaposing the supposedly taboo social memes of sex, death, and now, public excreta.

Honez

Can you translate that into English for me?

Which part? I thought it might have been a bit erudite, but straightforward enough nonetheless.

[Guest Verschränkung]

Dear Abby

 

At university our Philosophy lecturer informed us rather pompously that the only real human taboos involved sex and death. He soon changed his mind when I crept up as his back was turned and took a sh*t on his chair. Do you have any bright ideas of what I say in my forthcoming appeal against exclusion?

Firstly, I think you would have been better trying push his stool in.

Secondly, you should get him to qualify whether he meant the taboos were sex and death (that is sex leading to death D. Caradine-style), or sex and death (necrophiliac-style), or sex and death (coitus followed by an indeterminate time frame, followed by expiration). Each of these would lead to very different philosophical debates.

Also, sex could refer to gender, so again, depending on the level of pomposity, you could debate this at length, especially how the word sex immediately leads to Freudian interpretations, not gender.

 

You could also enter into an equally vacuous, yet completely valid discourse on the definition of death. In some cultures, this is brain death (Mr Sharon is therefore dead), physician-declared (or Belgian PM-declared) death, one-year MIA declared death, etc.

 

Any of the above may deflect the philosophical argument tangentially far enough to absolve you of said turd placement and the ultimate philosophical underpinnings inherent in the act of juxtaposing the supposedly taboo social memes of sex, death, and now, public excreta.

Honez

Can you translate that into English for me?

Which part? I thought it might have been a bit erudite, but straightforward enough nonetheless.

 

I came (or perhaps I didn't come), I shat (or perhaps I didn't sh*t), I croaked (or perhaps I didn't croak).

 

It's all a bit Schrödinger's Cat.

[Lord Fellatio Nelson 6,218]

Dear Abby

 

At university our Philosophy lecturer informed us rather pompously that the only real human taboos involved sex and death. He soon changed his mind when I crept up as his back was turned and took a sh*t on his chair. Do you have any bright ideas of what I say in my forthcoming appeal against exclusion?

Firstly, I think you would have been better trying push his stool in.

Secondly, you should get him to qualify whether he meant the taboos were sex and death (that is sex leading to death D. Caradine-style), or sex and death (necrophiliac-style), or sex and death (coitus followed by an indeterminate time frame, followed by expiration). Each of these would lead to very different philosophical debates.

Also, sex could refer to gender, so again, depending on the level of pomposity, you could debate this at length, especially how the word sex immediately leads to Freudian interpretations, not gender.

 

You could also enter into an equally vacuous, yet completely valid discourse on the definition of death. In some cultures, this is brain death (Mr Sharon is therefore dead), physician-declared (or Belgian PM-declared) death, one-year MIA declared death, etc.

 

Any of the above may deflect the philosophical argument tangentially far enough to absolve you of said turd placement and the ultimate philosophical underpinnings inherent in the act of juxtaposing the supposedly taboo social memes of sex, death, and now, public excreta.

Honez

Can you translate that into English for me?

Which part? I thought it might have been a bit erudite, but straightforward enough nonetheless.

 

I came (or perhaps I didn't come), I shat (or perhaps I didn't sh*t), I croaked (or perhaps I didn't croak).

 

It's all a bit Schrödinger's Cat.

Schrodingers cat?

I only know the Cat in the Hat..........

[Godot 149]

Well there's this cat in Copenhagen that belongs to a bloke called Schrodinger and he sticks it in a box. Now as long as it's in the box it doesn't matter whether it's alive or dead. It could be both, but since Shrodinger can't see it and couldn't give a monkey's one way or the other, he leaves it where it is. Then there's some mathematics stuff or physics stuff that says the cat could be alive or dead or maybe both (I don't understand this). Anyway it's debatable and apparently some people spend a lot of time and effort debating this. It must be dead by now. There is no sex or defecation involved so the comparison is somewhat specious.

[Lord Fellatio Nelson 6,218]

Well there's this cat in Copenhagen that belongs to a bloke called Schrodinger and he sticks it in a box. Now as long as it's in the box it doesn't matter whether it's alive or dead. It could be both, but since Shrodinger can't see it and couldn't give a monkey's one way or the other, he leaves it where it is. Then there's some mathematics stuff or physics stuff that says the cat could be alive or dead or maybe both (I don't understand this). Anyway it's debatable and apparently some people spend a lot of time and effort debating this. It must be dead by now. There is no sex or defecation involved so the comparison is somewhat specious.

Ah!!!

I see it all now.

Its bollocks then.

[Monoclinic 39]

Well there's this cat in Copenhagen that belongs to a bloke called Schrodinger and he sticks it in a box. Now as long as it's in the box it doesn't matter whether it's alive or dead. It could be both, but since Shrodinger can't see it and couldn't give a monkey's one way or the other, he leaves it where it is. Then there's some mathematics stuff or physics stuff that says the cat could be alive or dead or maybe both (I don't understand this). Anyway it's debatable and apparently some people spend a lot of time and effort debating this. It must be dead by now. There is no sex or defecation involved so the comparison is somewhat specious.

 

If you can't see in the box how do you know if you haven't got a scatty cat?

 

Nine out of ten cats prefer scat.

[Lard Bazaar 3,799]

Is this an appropriate time to make a joke about my pussy?

[Star Crossed 33]

Is this an appropriate time to make a joke about my pussy?

No. No one cares about your pussy. Or your vomit, your drunkenness, your ex-husband, your aching shitcunt, whatever. Why don't you f u ck off to a forum where people actually value your "contributions", you f ucking parasite? You're worse than iain for wasting space on threads.

 

Dear Abby,

Why are so many crass, talentless human excrement posting so regularly on this site? Is it symptomatic of societal decay in general? Yes, I thought so. Should we burn them all in power stations to light the homes of the righteous? Yes, I thought you'd agree.

 

Edit: I spent much of my working day today trying to drum sense into imbeciles like you; the sort of untermensch who can't really fend for themselves in the real world so hide their shame through over-indulgence in fags, booze, food, pathetic one-line comments on internet forums and general sloth. Why the F U C K should I have to come to (what used to be) a relatively droll and well-populated forum and have to trawl through sh*t posted by the same class of barely-human scum I spent all day wiping from the soles of my shoes?

[CarolAnn 926]

Because, deep down, you missed me.

 

EDIT: Well, damn, this was an answer to a post that vanished into the haze. Never freaking mind, then, because I really don't think LB missed me.

 

EDIT x2: S*hit, it's back. I gotta get more sleep. Anyway, SC, there's my answer. Take it or leave it. I'm confused.

[Lord Fellatio Nelson 6,218]

Is this an appropriate time to make a joke about my pussy?

No. No one cares about your pussy. Or your vomit, your drunkenness, your ex-husband, your aching shitcunt, whatever. Why don't you f u ck off to a forum where people actually value your "contributions", you f ucking parasite? You're worse than iain for wasting space on threads.

 

Dear Abby,

Why are so many crass, talentless human excrement posting so regularly on this site? Is it symptomatic of societal decay in general? Yes, I thought so. Should we burn them all in power stations to light the homes of the righteous? Yes, I thought you'd agree.

 

Edit: I spent much of my working day today trying to drum sense into imbeciles like you; the sort of untermensch who can't really fend for themselves in the real world so hide their shame through over-indulgence in fags, booze, food, pathetic one-line comments on internet forums and general sloth. Why the F U C K should I have to come to (what used to be) a relatively droll and well-populated forum and have to trawl through sh*t posted by the same class of barely-human scum I spent all day wiping from the soles of my shoes?

 

Why should you indeed.

What a sanctimonious prick you are.

[Guest Guest_Star Crossed_*]

Thanks to Notapotato, the most dickless excuse for a Moderator I've ever had the misfortune to encounter, I'm incapable of a decent retort to the above. I can't post as myself now because, as well as the 10% warning NAP gave me, he also suspended my posting rights. Dickless. And utterly contemptible.

 

"Sorry, your posting rights have been temporarily suspended. The suspension is due to end on Sep 23 2009, 10:04 PM."

 

Just as I've always suspected, this is more proof that NAP has never had the best interests of this site in mind; his only purpose seems to be to let as many of the illiterate, worthless, happy-slapping hoi-polloi post here as often as their fat fingers can type. I'd tell him that in a PM, but it seems he's blocked those, too. Pathetic. Your fellow Mods know what I mean, NAP. They all know.

[honez 79]

Thanks to Notapotato, the most dickless excuse for a Moderator I've ever had the misfortune to encounter, I'm incapable of a decent retort to the above. I can't post as myself now because, as well as the 10% warning NAP gave me, he also suspended my posting rights. Dickless. And utterly contemptible.

 

"Sorry, your posting rights have been temporarily suspended. The suspension is due to end on Sep 23 2009, 10:04 PM."

 

Just as I've always suspected, this is more proof that NAP has never had the best interests of this site in mind; his only purpose seems to be to let as many of the illiterate, worthless, happy-slapping hoi-polloi post here as often as their fat fingers can type. I'd tell him that in a PM, but it seems he's blocked those, too. Pathetic. Your fellow Mods know what I mean, NAP. They all know.

SC, I don't agree with most of what you said in your post, but I think you should be able to say what you think, and certainly get right of reply.

Suspending your posting rights to 23 Sep isn't that long, so I suspect !Pot was giving you a cooling off period, Steve McQueen-style.

When you are allowed to post again, I hope you've used the period to compose your responses and get your point across eloquently, passionately and with the verve that you've shown in the past.

I really hope you don't vent your spleen in an undignified rant about all and sundry. That won't help anyone's cause.

If you've got a genuine grievance with !Pot or Lardy, then by all means get it on, but do it with razor wit, barbs, style and venom. It's much more satisfying than ranting, IMHO.

[Star Crossed 33]

SC, I don't agree with most of what you said in your post, but I think you should be able to say what you think, and certainly get right of reply. Suspending your posting rights to 23 Sep isn't that long, so I suspect !Pot was giving you a cooling off period, Steve McQueen-style.

It would seem that someone has overridden Leutnant NAP's kuhler-befehl. And rescinded the warning.

 

When you are allowed to post again, I hope you've used the period to compose your responses and get your point across eloquently, passionately and with the verve that you've shown in the past.

Firstly, it wasn't a response, it was an attack. An attack on LB and his ilk, and on NAP. That said, is there any point, honez? Are eloquence, passion and verve really qualities which you feel still have a place at DL? The moderative standards of late (the last 2 years) certainly suggest otherwise. Why doesn't everyone just burp and fart their way through membership of this forum? Why don't we all crack out 5000 posts and be pleased with our übertwuntdom? Forgive my cynicism.

 

I really hope you don't vent your spleen in an undignified rant about all and sundry. That won't help anyone's cause. If you've got a genuine grievance with !Pot or Lardy, then by all means get it on, but do it with razor wit, barbs, style and venom. It's much more satisfying than ranting, IMHO.

No, far from ranting about all and sundry, honez, I'll be very specific... I strongly believe that DL has been progressively dumbed-down over the last 2 years by a succession of posters who do not deserve to have membership of this forum. This has been exacerbated, indeed actively supported, by an almost comical lack of Mod intervention.

 

As regards the requirement for razor wit, barbs and venom, would you sit down and explain to a dog that the reason he's going into kennels is that you've been roped into some work junket in a far-away land which he'll never see, to which you'll travel in a huge man-made object that can fly in the sky like a bird, carrying hundreds of humans thousands of miles; a country in which his species is firmly on the menu? No. Would you sit down and explain to the dog why biting your leg is a bad thing to do and that he should really consider a more measured response next time? No. Why? Because dogs don't understand human language, certainly not implication or connotation. Sure, a conditioned, Pavlovian response to certain words, but no actual understanding of what's being said (ok, CA, i'm sure Cockers are the exception). That's why I use primitive language occasionally; because, as when we must admonish an unruly dog (who can't appreciate razor wit, barbs or venom), sometimes we have to just use our more base, more primitive, more simple means to get the message across.

 

Yours was a very fair response honez, good Moderation, but let's not kid ourselves that I'm in some tiny minority of intellectual-fascist loonies. I'm definitely not alone in my feelings but I am, as I have been for some time now, the only one who's willing to poke my head over the parapet and fire a flare to illuminate what's on many, many members' minds. If that's the part I have to play occassionally to make this point, fair enough.

 

Until the day I'm banned, I'll probably be occasionally, publicly, making the unwelcome feel as unwelcome as they deserve to feel. Let's face it, we're all considered worthless scum somewhere. There must be forums better than this, more erudite, more witty, where they'd look down on the likes of me and think "talentless, pathetic cretins... off with their heads!" but this forum is/was about my level; it feels right for me in many respects and I hate seeing it slide down the slippery slope to twitterdom. I'll never be thought of as a conservative but, in respect of my feelings toward DL, I'm a Neo-Con. I'm Dick Cheney. On crack. With a bottle of baby oil, a bag of marshmallows and a shotgun.

[Windsor 2,233]

How old are you again?

 

...and this may sound rich coming from me, but get a grip.

[Lard Bazaar 3,799]

Barely human scum? I've obviously gone up in the world

[Lord Fellatio Nelson 6,218]

I dont neccessarily think it was right to stop SC posting, on the contrary, when somebody is digging a hole, take away their spade and give them a shovel.

Since when has any member had the right to decide whether another member has the intellect, acumen, wit or character to be allowed to post on here?

WTF is next? Ethnic cleansing? Marching gays to the gas chambers?

Not everybody is a wordsmith, University educated or sharp, infact this forum wouldnt work if everybody was.

Im not pretending that I havent attempted to shoot people down, I have a great dislike for arrogance, pomposity and the delusional. I dont think I have ever attacked anybody on here with the sheer nastiness and venom SC did.

All that was missing from that tirade was a knife and something to garrote LB with.

There are people using this forum who see themselves as slightly higher up the food chain than the rest, why should anybody disappoint them with the truth?

It was no better here two years ago than it is now, it wasnt better in the 1960s and not everybody pulled together during the war.

Its all a big f'ucking myth perpetrated by people who have great difficulty living in the present, well tough luck, the past has gone and its the big here and now.

If SC doesnt like the way the forum has "dumbed down" why doesnt he f'uck off and create his own?

Are we not all a bunch of parasites? We didnt put the work in to create this forum, we didnt have the ideas or nous to get it up and running but, by christ, we come here on a regular basis to feed.

To use the dog analogy, if you are feeding off of one and dont particulary like the taste of the blood, go find another dog.

Worthless scum?

Yes SC, you probably are.

[Godot 149]

This reminds me of the scene in Reservoir Dogs where each member of the gang is pointing their gun at another's head, then all pull the trigger at once. As a partial observer I find it highly entertaining and worthy of the Patrick Moore thread. After reprising his role as bad boy of the DL I hope that SC doesn't go off in a huff again ("and you can f'uck off too Godot"). I, for one, enjoy Lardy's self-deprecating contributions and find her wit as sharp as anything I read here. There has to be room for people talking about last night's supper (even if it ends up in the gutter) as much as exchanges on the state of the cosmos. It takes all sorts and you find them here.

 

I also agree with SC (and I know that LFN does too on this point) that the threads have been diluted by too many shi't posters, but Lardy isn't one of them. Worst of all, however, is the apathy that has overtaken the place. At least this latest outburst is counter to that trend. I was going to stop at 3,000 posts but forgot. Shi't I'm glad now.

 

PS. I also don't like censorship. All the same I'm glad that twat Toky whatsisname (way back) got banned after he called me a fudge packer. I thought he was talking about fudge at first until the penny dropped.

[Tuber Mirum 125]

Just as I've always suspected, this is more proof that NAP has never had the best interests of this site in mind; his only purpose seems to be to let as many of the illiterate, worthless, happy-slapping hoi-polloi post here as often as their fat fingers can type.

 

As you can possibly imagine StarCrossed, my perception of the best interests of this site includes protecting its valued members' feelings against the pompous vitriol of the severely deluded.

 

Your kind of imperious behaviour is truly damaging to Deathlist as opposed to any de-intellectualising taking place according to your (and only your) diseased fancying.

 

If this site isn't what your perversely arrogant imagination would like it to be or feels it might once have been then feel free to go away and never come back. If it were up to me you would be banned immediately.

[Lard Bazaar 3,799]

I'm just pissed off that shitcunt got through the swear filter, I have to put an apostrophe in f'uck.

[maryportfuncity 10,646]

I'm just pissed off that shitcunt got through the swear filter, I have to put an apostrophe in f'uck.

 

Lardy, I'm struggling to recognise anything of the luvverly person I met at DLCON II from SC's rant above. My cash will supply you with a generous measure of white wine upon our next meeting in an attempt to help you recover from the personal attack.

 

SC mate, we haven't always seen eye to eye, and I'm the kind of bleeding heart liberal who'd still defend your right to post, but you're way off the mark on this one, end of.

[Body Snatcher 44 107]

Dear Abby.

 

Not wanting to drag myself into this heated debate - I feel the need to express my intentions for wishing to partake in the various discussions of this sight.

 

Star Crossed mentions that "...I strongly believe that DL has been progressively dumbed-down over the last 2 years by a succession of posters who do not deserve to have membership of this forum. This has been exacerbated, indeed actively supported, by an almost comical lack of Mod intervention." Naturally I fall into this category having joined at the beginning of this year.

 

However I do not intend to be a fly-by-night contributor who leaves when the novelty wheres off, rather stick it out for the long haul and contribute when I feel necessary, if that includes playing the part of whipping boy then so be it - honestly I don't care (bring it on).

 

I always check my spelling, a technique I use when I write, because if I don't it retards my prose. Grammar is still sometimes an issue though!

 

I originally sought to celebrate the lives of the colorful characters which the world has produced who are no-longer with us. Yet I have since been drawn into other discussions that have sparked my interest as well as have fun in the process.

 

I have fallen victim to the Mod interventions - If everyone remembers that short lived forum Chubby Chaser.

 

Regards.

Body Snatcher 44.

 

P.S. If you ever find yourselves in Australia come and visit, I'll take you surfing.

[Lord Fellatio Nelson 6,218]

Dear Abby.

 

Not wanting to drag myself into this heated debate - I feel the need to express my intentions for wishing to partake in the various discussions of this sight.

 

Star Crossed mentions that "...I strongly believe that DL has been progressively dumbed-down over the last 2 years by a succession of posters who do not deserve to have membership of this forum. This has been exacerbated, indeed actively supported, by an almost comical lack of Mod intervention." Naturally I fall into this category having joined at the beginning of this year.

 

However I do not intend to be a fly-by-night contributor who leaves when the novelty wheres off, rather stick it out for the long haul and contribute when I feel necessary, if that includes playing the part of whipping boy then so be it - honestly I don't care (bring it on).

 

I always check my spelling, a technique I use when I write, because if I don't it retards my prose. Grammar is still sometimes an issue though!

 

I originally sought to celebrate the lives of the colorful characters which the world has produced who are no-longer with us. Yet I have since been drawn into other discussions that have sparked my interest as well as have fun in the process.

 

I have fallen victim to the Mod interventions - If everyone remembers that short lived forum Chubby Chaser.

 

Regards.

Body Snatcher 44.

 

P.S. If you ever find yourselves in Australia come and visit, I'll take you surfing.

I dont see what the problem is?

Why are you already making apologies when you have no need to?

If people dont like what you post they either wont respond or will have a whinge ( us poms are good at whinging) and you will be most welcome to hit back.

Yes, some of the posts from members has been dire and, to an extent, it does make the forum look more sh*te than it actually is but, hey, thats the richness and diversity of life.

Honez is likely to have kittens at your spelling but Im sure that he will view the content and constuction of what you post as a priority over spelling, which is how it should be really.

Who wants to read a grammatically perfect and spelling mistake free post when it doesnt actually say anything?

Im thinking about installing an "Analometer" in this Church of the crass, purely to ensure that no Cockspanners, Ruffians or the socially inadequate can get in.

That, Im sure, will please the one few....

[Body Snatcher 44 107]

Dear Abby.

 

Not wanting to drag myself into this heated debate - I feel the need to express my intentions for wishing to partake in the various discussions of this sight.

 

Star Crossed mentions that "...I strongly believe that DL has been progressively dumbed-down over the last 2 years by a succession of posters who do not deserve to have membership of this forum. This has been exacerbated, indeed actively supported, by an almost comical lack of Mod intervention." Naturally I fall into this category having joined at the beginning of this year.

 

However I do not intend to be a fly-by-night contributor who leaves when the novelty wheres off, rather stick it out for the long haul and contribute when I feel necessary, if that includes playing the part of whipping boy then so be it - honestly I don't care (bring it on).

 

I always check my spelling, a technique I use when I write, because if I don't it retards my prose. Grammar is still sometimes an issue though!

 

I originally sought to celebrate the lives of the colorful characters which the world has produced who are no-longer with us. Yet I have since been drawn into other discussions that have sparked my interest as well as have fun in the process.

 

I have fallen victim to the Mod interventions - If everyone remembers that short lived forum Chubby Chaser.

 

Regards.

Body Snatcher 44.

 

P.S. If you ever find yourselves in Australia come and visit, I'll take you surfing.

I dont see what the problem is?

Why are you already making apologies when you have no need to?

If people dont like what you post they either wont respond or will have a whinge ( us poms are good at whinging) and you will be most welcome to hit back.

Yes, some of the posts from members has been dire and, to an extent, it does make the forum look more sh*te than it actually is but, hey, thats the richness and diversity of life.

Honez is likely to have kittens at your spelling but Im sure that he will view the content and constuction of what you post as a priority over spelling, which is how it should be really.

Who wants to read a grammatically perfect and spelling mistake free post when it doesnt actually say anything?

Im thinking about installing an "Analometer" in this Church of the crass, purely to ensure that no Cockspanners, Ruffians or the socially inadequate can get in.

That, Im sure, will please the one few....

 

It wasn't so much an apology as it was an attempt to distance myself from the likes of Bob Bloblah (or whatever his name is) and the other galahs, who couldn't organize a fart in a baked bean factory and who seem a constant nuisance to you guys. My point is I want to annoy you with WHAT I'm saying not how I'm saying it. - I would never apologize for what I do and write on the internet, no matter how controversial.

 

Also I'm fully a-Where of the spelling mistake in my previous post.