The 6th Crowdsource Deathlist (2021 edition)

[The Old Crem 3,602]

On 30/09/2021 at 16:56, msc said:

I have no issues taking back the Crowdsourced List (its remarkably little time in the year overall) as I slide out of the DDP hosting, but after 2 years of the DDP I am not up to hosting the Deathlist Cup. But surely someone else will step in if its as popular as folk claim.

I would volunteer to help run something but my health is still pretty rough so I am not able to commit. If it improves then I will reconsider. 

[Grim Up North 3,725]

On 30/09/2021 at 16:47, Joey Russ said:

Hello, I am well aware that this has not really been updated at all during the year. Over the last 6 months or so my overall motivation for keeping up with dead pooling has declined a lot. This is why I’m announcing today that I am retiring from hosting any dead pools barring the yearly Advent Avalanche. Now I won’t be retiring from dead pooling all together but I am probably taking a much more limited approach for the time being. I am sorry this hasn’t been taken care of, but hopefully someone can step up to the plate in hosting both this and the Deathlist cup as they really are amazing pools in general, and I don’t want either of them to die out because of a lack of a host. 

 

Hi Joey - I'm pleased to hear you are not as motivated for dead pooling as you were and hope you have found other things to fill your time that bring joy to your life without the requirement for someone to die.

 

Best wishes, GUN. 

[Spade_Cooley 9,525]

I mean, I could run the Cup if nobody else can...

[msc 18,448]

I'd like to thank Joey for running the Crowdsourced list for 3 years for everyone on the forum, and wish him well. I'll be updating the obits for the rest of the year and be the person getting all those random weather men on your lists in December.

 

Anyhow, a bit of catching up (and I'll be recycling bits of the DDP obits for obvious reasons)...

 

NO TIME FOR DAI

 

4/50

 

 

 

10th February 2021

 

Former Welsh international footballer Dai Davies has died in hospice care aged 72. The former Everton and Swansea goalkeeper played 52 times for his homeland between 1975 and 1982. At Wrexham, he helped win the third division title. His autobiography was translated as Never Say Dai in English. He commentated, taught PE, and owned a bookstore. He was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer last summer, and his hospice status led to a debut on The Crowdsourced List in 2021. Attempts to say he had No Time To Dai proved fruitless, as it turns out, and he provides the Crowdsourced List with its 4th hit in 41 days of the year. Will this prove to be a bountiful year for the list? Time will tell! (Ahem)

[msc 18,448]

MENEM MENEM (DO DO DO DO)

 

5/50

 

 

 

14th February 2021

 

Former Argentine President  Carlos Menem, has died aged 90 to give The Crowdsourced Deathlist another success. In recent years he had suffered heart problems, lung problems, liver problems, stroke problems, crocodile problems, and a co-ordinated suicide attack on his home by a passing asteroid. Former political prisoner Carlos Menem was elected as a centrist who promised little (much like Clinton), but who struggled with the financial realities of the job (also like Clinton). Like Bill Clinton, his enemies suggested even more nefarious wrong doing, and like Clinton, he had an affair with Linda Tri… I’ve taken this analogy too far. It is arguable that Menem is actually one of the better Argentine Presidents in living memory. But when that includes Videla and Galtieri, you have to think: poor fuckers. His time in office was known for Menemism politics (really not helping that Muppets meme, guys) in which privatisation was key in trying to save an economy unstable after the Falklands War. Menem increased the number of Supreme Court Judges (just an idea, Joe), re-established diplomatic ties with the US and UK, made peace with Chile, and instituted widespread welfare reforms. He was also a gun smuggler, covered up at least one journalist’s murder, and had his own personal zoo while President. Menem was charged with holding illegal funds in a Swiss bank account. However the courts agreed that the money was just resting in his account. He was still being chased up for the whole weapons/murder thing when he decided that death gave you immunity from jail time. He was the 5th success for the Crowdsourced Deathlist with Februarly only halfway done. 

[msc 18,448]

RUSH IN LIMBO

 

6/50

 

 

17th February 2021

 

American loudmouth radio host Rush Limbaugh has died of lung cancer, on the same day that Mount Etna erupted. Experts warned of the toxic danger to human life, and also about the volcano. Limbaugh used his radio show to promote Republican concerns. He was a big believer in American exceptionalism, flag wrapped patriotism, and believed that the welfare state trained a person to hate America. He was not a fan of gays, and used to run segments mocking AIDS deaths by name. He felt the US was too lenient on drugs, and disagreed with the existence of climate change. He also didn’t like green energy, feminism, the existence of Barack Obama, or liberalism. He did however believe in George W Bush, torture, bombing Iraq, NAFTA, birtherism, tariffs, calling teenage girls sluts, and that gorillas could disprove the theory of evolution.

 

We've reached out to gorillas for comment here. They can't be arsed with politics and would rather paint and goof about. 

 

Rush LImbaugh once said we should all thank him for being a chain smoker. Fair enough, cheers for the 6th hit, mate...

[msc 18,448]

THERE'S NOTHING WRONG WITH THIS PICK EXCEPT HE'S DEAD!!!

 

7/50

 

 

13th March 2021

 

The great sports commentator Murray Walker has sadly died at the great age of 97. A tank commander in World War Two, Walker took to a career in advertising before he was known as a broadcaster. The classic “Opal fruits made to make your mouth water” was one of his, after they turned down the other option of “Opal fruits, made to make you puke”.  Enthusiastic for all things motorsport, Murray debuted on radio commentary for the BBC in 1949, but stuck to his day job until retirement age. In 1978 he became the full time voice of Formula One race on British TV. He was so enthusiastic for the sport that it rubbed off on the viewer, with his quips and one-liners becoming as legendary as the drivers themselves. Everyone has their favourite, but here’s a few of the best:

 

“I’ll stop my startwatch!”

“The car in front is absolutely unique except for the one behind which is identical!”

“With half the race gone, there is half the race still to go!”

“There’s nothing wrong with the car, except its on fire.”

“His hopes, which were nil before, are absolutely zero now!”

“The status quo could well be as it was before!”

 

Murray Walker loved Formula One and Formula One loved Murray Walker. He was good friends with the late Graham Hill, and followed Hill’s son Damon’s career with great interest. In 1996, Damon Hill followed in his fathers footsteps, winning the Formula 1 Championship on the final day, and Walker’s emotional commentary became as part a moment of the iconic sporting moment: “He took the lead! He stayed there! And Damon Hill exits the chicane and WINS the Japanese Grand Prix, and I’ve got to stop, because I’ve got a lump in my throat…”

 

It wasn’t just the great moments Walker was there for. In the aftermath of the Ayrton Senna tragedy, viewers and the BBC turned to Walker to find the right words to guide them through the horrific loss. He formed a popular double act on commentary with James Hunt. He followed Formula 1 from BBC to ITV to Sky. He won lifetime achievement awards from the RTS and BAFTA. In 2013, aged 90, he came down with cancer, and squashed it faster than Vader squashed Inoki in Japan. He continued to write his articles on the sport until the bitter end. It gives us no joy to accept the great Murray Walker as the 7th Crowdsourced hit of 2021. 

[msc 18,448]

WE CAN'T SEE CLEARY NOW THE WRITERS GONE

 

8/50

 

 

25th March 2021

 

Children’s author Beverly Cleary has died aged 104. In her childhood she had struggled to read and viewed the books her schools lumped on her as not having any people she knew in real life in them. In the 1950s, she set about writing stories about the sorts of worlds 1950s kids would recognise as their own. She wrote about Henry Huggins and his dog Ribsy, and spun off into a successful series about his neighbour, Ramona. She published her last book in 1999. Clearly revolutionised children's novels in the US, turning them from the staid old Victoriana into the normal kid next door has adventures plots you can recognise all over American media nowadays. In this way she set the path for everything in her wake from Cubs at Play to Stranger Things.  Modern greats like RL Stine and Judy Blume called Cleary their inspiration. So it is perhaps a bit ironic that the children's librarian once pointed to the Ramona books as a suitable friendly alternative to the Goosebumps series. If you live long enough, everything subversive and new becomes an accepted part of the old tradition.  Look forward to Twilight being recommended instead of that new rubbish by school teachers in 50 years time. Beverly Cleary was the 8th success for the 2021 Crowdsourced list.

[msc 18,448]

DEATH LIST? TRY A HEARING AIDE

 

9/50

 

 

9th April 2021

 

Prince Philip  has died after a long period of failing health. You might have heard of him. Philip was born part of the Greek royal family, in a period so stable his grandfather had just been assassinated and his family were about to be overthrown. When he was one year old he was banished from Greece, narrowly avoiding death, thus starting as he meant to go on. By 1939, despite a number of personal losses (including his sister and niece in a plane crash), he joined the Royal Navy, and swiftly moved up the ranks as an adept officer. As midshipman, he was on the front line protecting convoys from u-boat attack. He was involved in the Battle of Crete, and took control of a battleship during a crucial battle in the Mediterranean. He remained involved in a number of Naval battles during the war, and was present when the Japanese surrendered in 1945. His Navy career was such that eventual promotion to First Lord of the Admiralty seemed on the cards, but with war over, Philip preferred to chase his teenage sweetheart instead. He married Princess Elizabeth (you may have heard of her) in 1947.

In 1952 Philip found himself consort to the Queen. By this time he was already father to Charles (a relationship which struggled) and Anne (who is her own father). He took up the promotion of various charities, and created the Duke of Edinburgh Awards, which schools still try and force kids to go on. Aware that the patronage of the Duke of Edinburgh could “speed up red tape”, he promptly gave it to over 800 organisations and things. He was also famously protective of his grandchildren and was regarded as a rock of support during the various tragedies and losses in recent royal history.

But you want the gaffes, right? Prince Philip couldn’t go ten minutes without saying something to annoy someone. He became famous in later life for a long serious of quips and fluffs which ranged from the genuinely funny (“how do you keep the natives off the booze?” to a Scottish driving instructor), to those the recipients claim they found funny (claiming a blinded IRA bomb victim must be blind with the tie he was wearing), to the badly timed to the somewhat frankly dodgy (the slitty eyes remark in China, for example). The latter of course led to his casual racist reputation. Which is a shame, to be frank, as calling Prince Andrew's home “a tarts bedroom” was legit funny.  Many of his online critics about the more racist comments tended to refer to him as Phil the Greek, which is an odd bit of hypocrisy.

Now he's dead, we can point out that Philip used to be notorious for allegedly having a thing with Zsa Zsa Gabor. In the weeks leading up to Philip’s death, there was a lot of handwringing about Philip’s reactions to Prince Harry’s recent flounce to America. Knowing Prince Philip, we can only assume his reaction was: “An actress, eh? Go on, my son!”

He was the 9th Crowdsourced success of 2021, having been on all the previous editions of the list.

[msc 18,448]

DEAD ACTORS SOCIETY

 

10/50

 

 

11th May 2021

 

Actor Norman Lloyd's career started with Orson Welles at the Mercury Theatre in the 1930s, before he transferred to playing villains for Alfred Hitchcock in films such as Saboteur, in which he fell off the top of the Statue of Liberty. Despite that setback, he also appeared in Spellbound and would later become producer of Alfred Hitchcock Presents, the TV anthology series which helped inspire The Twilight Zone and Tales of the Unexpected. The latter of which he also helped produce. At the same time he starred opposite Charlie Chaplin in  Limelight. He refused to testify before the McCarthy Witchhunt trials at the time, which led to a spell on the blacklist. Into his 70s he appeared on all your favourite US TV shows: Star Trek, Murder She Wrote, and he had main roles in St Elsewhere and forgotten 90s SF series Seven Days. He also appeared in Dead Poets Society, for which he only agreed to audition for after beating the director at tennis!  A keen Sci-Fi fan, he financed Journey to the Unknown and brought his directorial eye to Columbo. His last film was Trainwreck, after which he retired. If we had to work with Amy Schumer, we’d retire too.

[msc 18,448]

INDIAN SUMMER ENDS FOR DILIP

 

11/50

 

 

 

7th July 2021

 

Bollywood legend and icon Dilip Kumar had died aged 98. The most successful actor in Bollywood history, he was a proponent of method acting and won 8 awards. His roles went from romance to comedy to serious crime drama. He had a seven year relationship with his co-star Madhubala, until he was forced to testify against her father in the Naya Daur court case. Kumar had been in poor health for years, suffering from cancer and many other ailments, and was a frequent visitor to the ICU in recent times. He is the 11th success for the 2021 Crowdsourced Deathlist, much to the shock of forum regular Drol. 

[msc 18,448]

DER BOMBER DAS BOOTED!

12/50

 

 

15th August 2021

 

Gerd Muller, one of the most successful strikers in football history, has died after a long battle with dementia aged 75. Gerd Muller played 15 years for Bayern Munich, during which time he scored over 400 goals and won four Bundesliga titles, 3 European Cups and 1 Cup Winners Cup. He was top scorer in the German top flight 7 seasons and won the Ballon d’or in 1970.  As a German international, his stats were insane, 68 goals in 62 games, and he was a crucial part of the 1970 and 1974 German World Cup sides. In fact, Muller scored the winning goal in the 1974 World Cup final. Gerd Muller also won the 1972 Euros. Muller remains one of the greatest goalscorers ever to play football, a man who retired from international football aged 28, who was still knocking in dozens in Florida aged 37 and semi-retired. Even today, genuine legends like Lionel Messi and Cristiano Ronaldo have had to play considerably more matches than Muller did to surpass his records. Der Bomber was the 12th success for the 2012 Crowdsourced List.

[msc 18,448]

WHOLE LOTTA HISTORY

 

13/50

 

 

5th September 2021

 

One-fifth of pop music behemoths Girls Aloud, Sarah Harding has died aged only 39 after a publicised battle with Stage IV cancer. Harding worked as a BT phone operator and a Pizza Hut waitress before successfully auditioning for Popstars: The Rivals, a Pete Waterman bid to find a new manufactured pop success for the new century. From hundreds of applicants, they would create a boy band and a girl band of 5 members each, and they’d fight for the crown.  The final decision was that of the listening public, who decided which final song they preferred: Sound of the Underground by Girls Aloud, or Sacred Trust by One True Voice, the boyband. I wont keep you in suspense here, as you’ve never heard of One True Voice if you weren’t born in the UK, whereas Sound of the Underground is regarded as a proper modern pop classic. Girls Aloud absolutely trounced the boys, not only selling over 100, 000 more singles, but having a 4 week run at the top of the charts, and gaining the Christmas number one for 2002. And once they won the publics affection, they weren’t to lose it in the next decade, with four UK number one hits and TWENTY ONE UK top 10 singles. There was a simple reason for their success – they were bloody good. Songs like Biology, No Good Advice and Love Machine are simple and catchy, and well sung. They were the band every rock fan in the UK thought they were a secret fan of. The band even those disparaging of manufactured pop would discount as “obviously we don’t mean Girls Aloud”.

 

Sarah Harding was an important part of the group, her soaring voice holding the anchor in the songs. Off stage she was inspired by the Gallagher brothers and tried to present herself as a rebel, but when the band split up, she suffered from addiction demons. Publicised run ins with the law followed. Preferring acting, she spent most of the last decade working out what she wanted to do with her life – she acted, she wrote songs, she learned gymnastics, and became increasingly more in demand for TV appearances for her madcap but witty commentary. Harding had gone teetotal and agreed to a 20th anniversary comeback with Girls Aloud for 2022, when suddenly she was diagnosed with late stage cancer.

 

Recent documentary evidence has come to light to tell us that before she became part of one of the most successful pop acts of the 21st Century, she worked briefly as a palaeontologist on Isla Sorna, just off the coast of Costa Rica. Despite the bands success, no interviewer was ever allowed to ask her about the infamous San Diego incident in 1997, when a large predator escaped off a cargo ship and caused a number of fatalities. Indeed when we asked Dr Ian Malcolm for comment he just shrugged and said “Can’t Speak French!”

 

So if interviews didn’t bring that up, you can imagine they didn’t touch on her family association with 90s Prime Minister Francis Urquhart either.

 

Sarah Harding was the 13th hit for The Crowdsourced Deathlist in 2021.

[msc 18,448]

SAINT AND GRIEVE-SIE

 

14/50

 

 

19th September 2021

 

Jimmy Greaves, the highly popular former English international footballer and broadcaster, has died aged 81 after years of poor health. A teenage sensation, Greaves debuted for Chelsea aged 17 and had scored 124 league goals by the time he was 20! One of the few players to have played for both Chelsea and Tottenham Hotspur, his time at Spurs saw him score another 220 league goals, where he also won the Cup Winners Cup and two FA Cups. His time in London (he also played for West Ham) sandwich a short run at AC Milan, which Greaves later called a failure, but a scoring failure for Jimmy Greaves was only scoring 9 goals in 10 games… For England he scored 44 goals, and appeared in 2 World Cups, though his biggest disappointment was being dropped for the World Cup final in 1966 in favour of Roger Hunt. The disappointment reflected in his international career, as Alf Ramsay felt he had better options up front than England’s greatest ever goal machine, and Jimmy Greaves had no interest in being a bit part player.

By the end of his career he struggled with alcoholism (regularly downing 20 pints of lager a day) and dropped out of the game, but by the early 1970s, recognising the path he was on, he actively sought help for the addiction, even spending time in a psychiatric hospital to deal with it. In 1980 he told his friends, including 1966 World Cup winner Gordon Banks, that he was going teetotal for good, and he incredibly achieved this, remaining sober for the last 41 years of his life. 

Sober and back in football, Greaves was picked up by ITV as a pundit for their coverage of the 1982 World Cup. It was there, and through frequent appearances on the weekly World of Sport, that he became good friends with Ian St John, the Liverpool striker who was also a goal machine of the 1960s. The two sparked off well on TV, combining serious commentary with the ability to make each collapse in hysterics of laughter on live TV, and this combination made them huge fan favourites. They had their own football discussion show Saint and Greavsie, which ran for 7 years, and pioneered the more laidback, friendly manner of morning sports discussion which is now widespread. The show was cancelled, amid fury, in 1992 after ITV went in a huff about losing live football to Sky, but the pair remained the best of friends, and Saint kept close tabs on Greaves health, even as the Saint himself was suffering with terminal cancer.

Greaves was the 14th success of the year. As Oscar Wilde no doubt said, to lose one of Saint and Greaves in a year may be regarded as a misfortune, to lose both looks like carelessness. 

 

 

 

And that's us back up to date, I think.

[An Fear Beag 1,535]

On 11/10/2021 at 09:36, Spade_Cooley said:

I mean, I could run the Cup if nobody else can...

 

Considering that the format of the cup puts the host at a considerable disadvantage, I think I can speak for most players when I say it would be a wonderful idea for you to run it Spade. 

 

I don't suppose Banana and Gcreptile fancy co-hosting it with you?

[The Old Crem 3,602]

On 11/10/2021 at 16:40, msc said:

SAINT AND GRIEVE-SIE

 

14/50

 

 

19th September 2021

 

Jimmy Greaves, the highly popular former English international footballer and broadcaster, has died aged 81 after years of poor health. A teenage sensation, Greaves debuted for Chelsea aged 17 and had scored 124 league goals by the time he was 20! One of the few players to have played for both Chelsea and Tottenham Hotspur, his time at Spurs saw him score another 220 league goals, where he also won the Cup Winners Cup and two FA Cups. His time in London (he also played for West Ham) sandwich a short run at AC Milan, which Greaves later called a failure, but a scoring failure for Jimmy Greaves was only scoring 9 goals in 10 games… For England he scored 44 goals, and appeared in 2 World Cups, though his biggest disappointment was being dropped for the World Cup final in 1966 in favour of Roger Hunt. The disappointment reflected in his international career, as Alf Ramsay felt he had better options up front than England’s greatest ever goal machine, and Jimmy Greaves had no interest in being a bit part player.

By the end of his career he struggled with alcoholism (regularly downing 20 pints of lager a day) and dropped out of the game, but by the early 1970s, recognising the path he was on, he actively sought help for the addiction, even spending time in a psychiatric hospital to deal with it. In 1980 he told his friends, including 1966 World Cup winner Gordon Banks, that he was going teetotal for good, and he incredibly achieved this, remaining sober for the last 41 years of his life. 

Sober and back in football, Greaves was picked up by ITV as a pundit for their coverage of the 1982 World Cup. It was there, and through frequent appearances on the weekly World of Sport, that he became good friends with Ian St John, the Liverpool striker who was also a goal machine of the 1960s. The two sparked off well on TV, combining serious commentary with the ability to make each collapse in hysterics of laughter on live TV, and this combination made them huge fan favourites. They had their own football discussion show Saint and Greavsie, which ran for 7 years, and pioneered the more laidback, friendly manner of morning sports discussion which is now widespread. The show was cancelled, amid fury, in 1992 after ITV went in a huff about losing live football to Sky, but the pair remained the best of friends, and Saint kept close tabs on Greaves health, even as the Saint himself was suffering with terminal cancer.

Greaves was the 14th success of the year. As Oscar Wilde no doubt said, to lose one of Saint and Greaves in a year may be regarded as a misfortune, to lose both looks like carelessness. 

 

 

 

And that's us back up to date, I think.

Slightly pendanic but surely it was Hurst v Greaves for the final 1966 place. All of Hunt’s obituaries said he was never in danger of being dropped. Barry Davies said the same in the Greaves documentary shown on ITV as a tribute.

[msc 18,448]

38 minutes ago, The Old Crem said:

Slightly pendanic but surely it was Hurst v Greaves for the final 1966 place. All of Hunt’s obituaries said he was never in danger of being dropped. Barry Davies said the same in the Greaves documentary shown on ITV as a tribute.

 

Yeah, Hunt was the first choice - it was between Hurst and Greaves for the second spot up front. Mea culpa.

[msc 18,448]

EAST FOR EDEN

 

15/50

 

 

15th November 2021

 

Former spouse of the Prime Minister, Clarissa Eden, has died aged 101 to give The Crowdsourced Deathlist another success. The niece of Winston Churchill (dunno if you've heard of him), Clarissa spent her teenage years in Paris and London society, surrounded by the likes of Josephine Baker and future spies Burgess and MacLean. She studied at Oxford and helped decode German ciphers during WW2. Post-war, she worked as the fashion reviewer for Vogue and as a film assistant for Alexander Korda. However it was her work during the war where she became close to the then Foreign Secretary, Sir Anthony Eden, considered one of the most able politicians at the time. Eden divorced his wife and married the Bohemian girl in 1952, in a wedding which was both attended by Liz Taylor and publicly popular. (Who knew you could divorce you wife, move in with someone a quarter of a century younger than you, and become Prime Minister? Wouldn't happen these days!) She gave charm and appeal to the somewhat bookish Eden, and was to prove crucial for the rest of his life. In 1955, he finally got the job nearly everyone in Westminster felt he deserved - that of Prime Minister. Unfortunately, this was not the Anthony Eden of 1945 or 1935, it was the Anthony Eden who had just undergone life saving surgery and was now given vast quantities of a new wonder drug painkiller. Yes, he spent the rest of the 50s stoned off his tits on Benzedrine. Clarissa Eden looked after her husband during his ill health, and protected him from much Tory party criticism but was unable to stop the self-inflicted disaster that was the Suez Crisis overcoming both of them. Sir Anthony died in 1977 after a long period of ill heath, and Clarissa explains it all in a tell very little memoir. She did however authorise several biographies which focused less on the drug addled Egypt invasion and more on the peace treaties and world wars, helping to rehabilitate her husbands reputation as a statesman (if not as Prime Minister). Clarissa Eden, who remained popular with politicians and their spouses who called on her advice until recently, was remarkably longlived. Not only did she outlive her husband, and 5 of her successors as Prime Minsterial spouses. She also outlived her autobiography editor, as the biographer Cate Haste, with whom From Churchill to Eden was written, died of cancer in April. 

 

[The Old Crem 3,602]

14 minutes ago, msc said:

EAST FOR EDEN

 

15/50

 

 

15th November 2021

 

Former spouse of the Prime Minister, Clarissa Eden, has died aged 101 to give The Crowdsourced Deathlist another success. The niece of Winston Churchill (dunno if you've heard of him), Clarissa spent her teenage years in Paris and London society, surrounded by the likes of Josephine Baker and future spies Burgess and MacLean. She studied at Oxford and helped decode German ciphers during WW2. Post-war, she worked as the fashion reviewer for Vogue and as a film assistant for Alexander Korda. However it was her work during the war where she became close to the then Foreign Secretary, Sir Anthony Eden, considered one of the most able politicians at the time. Eden divorced his wife and married the Bohemian girl in 1952, in a wedding which was both attended by Liz Taylor and publicly popular. (Who knew you could divorce you wife, move in with someone a quarter of a century younger than you, and become Prime Minister? Wouldn't happen these days!) She gave charm and appeal to the somewhat bookish Eden, and was to prove crucial for the rest of his life. In 1955, he finally got the job nearly everyone in Westminster felt he deserved - that of Prime Minister. Unfortunately, this was not the Anthony Eden of 1945 or 1935, it was the Anthony Eden who had just undergone life saving surgery and was now given vast quantities of a new wonder drug painkiller. Yes, he spent the rest of the 50s stoned off his tits on Benzedrine. Clarissa Eden looked after her husband during his ill health, and protected him from much Tory party criticism but was unable to stop the self-inflicted disaster that was the Suez Crisis overcoming both of them. Sir Anthony died in 1977 after a long period of ill heath, and Clarissa explains it all in a tell very little memoir. She did however authorise several biographies which focused less on the drug addled Egypt invasion and more on the peace treaties and world wars, helping to rehabilitate her husbands reputation as a statesman (if not as Prime Minister). Clarissa Eden, who remained popular with politicians and their spouses who called on her advice until recently, was remarkably longlived. Not only did she outlive her husband, and 5 of her successors as Prime Minsterial spouses. She also outlived her autobiography editor, as the biographer Cate Haste, with whom From Churchill to Eden was written, died of cancer in April. 

 

Blimey you were quick. 

[msc 18,448]

NO MORE WALK ABOUT

 

16/50

 

 

29th November 2021

 

Aboriginal Australian actor David Gulpilil has died after a long battle with lung cancer to give a 16th success to the 2021 Crowdsourced Deathlist. Gulpilil made his breakthrough as a 16 year old actor in the film Walkabout, often played by teachers to quieten classrooms near the holidays. This success led to films like The Last Wave and Crocodile Dundee, in which he played Neville. In 2002, he appeared in Rabbit-Proof Fence, providing for a new generation another film often played by teachers to quieten classrooms near the holidays. In recent years personal demons (introduced by the filmmakers on WalkAbout) threatened to dominate the papers more than his acting, and he was put on trial in 2006 after allegedly threatening a landlord with a machete. His defence, that of course he had a machete on his body for carving digeridoos, actually worked. He later spent a year in jail after a domestic assault trial. His lengthy illness was well documented, hence his strong showing on the Crowdsourced list.

 

 

[msc 18,448]

BOB DOLE DOESN'T NEED THIS!

 

17/50

 

 

5th December 2021

 

(the rest is by @Death Impends)

 

Bob Dole has died at the age of 98, after many months of suffering from lung cancer. Bob Dole had an interesting and storied life that Bob Dole was proud of. Bob Dole served Bob Dole’s country in WWII, but almost died from gunfire on the battlefield and largely lost usage of Bob Dole’s arms. Bob Dole didn’t like that. Bob Dole had to carry a pen around just so people knew not to shake Bob Dole’s hand. But the war also made Bob Dole a hero. It got Bob Dole some neat shiny medals. Bob Dole should’ve died then, but Bob Dole persevered, and Bob Dole’s life of service was just beginning.

 

Entering politics as a Republican, Bob Dole would serve America and Bob Dole’s home state of Kansas for decades more, first as a representative and more prominently as a senator, where Bob Dole started off as a firebrand conservative and ended as a somewhat-more-conciliatory Majority Leader. Gerald Ford picked Bob Dole as his running mate in 1976. Jerry was a truly great man. He loved falling down almost as much as Bob Dole loved saying Bob Dole. But Jimmy Carter won. Bob Dole didn’t like that.

 

But Bob Dole didn’t give up easy. If Bob Dole couldn’t be vice president, then by golly, Bob Dole was going to be president. Come 1996, Bob Dole was in for a rude awakening. Folks, if you thought Democrats had a monopoly on uninspiring losing presidential campaigns, Bob Dole would like to have a word with you. Bob Dole learned that Bob Dole was a sacrificial lamb against Bill Clinton. Not even adapting Sam & Dave’s classic hit into “I’m a Dole Man” could save Bob Dole. Bill Clinton crushed Bob Dole. Bob Dole didn’t like that.

 

Bob Dole meandered in the wilderness for a few years after Bob Dole’s political career ended. Bob Dole needed a new passion to give Bob Dole’s life purpose again. Bob Dole got just that. The male impotency crisis took America by storm, but no politician wanted to take it on. It was Bob Dole’s time to shine again as a SPAM spokesman. Golly, it was the bravest thing Bob Dole did since WWII. Then Bob Dole got abducted by aliens. Bob Dole didn’t like that.

 

Bob Dole spent Bob Dole’s final years looking like a corpse, getting up from Bob Dole’s wheelchair to salute other elderly politicians Bob Dole somehow outlived, and being cited by the public as a “good ol’ days” bygone figure of US politics. Bob Dole supported Trump, but Bob Dole also admitted Trump lost last year, so Bob Dole hopes this convinces you that Bob Dole was moderate for a Republican. Bob Dole then got lung cancer this February. Bob Dole really didn’t like that. But Bob Dole was a fighter until the end (or maybe all the SPAM kept Bob Dole going) and lived until December, and in a final act of service, Bob Dole died in early December rather than on the 27th or something to make msc's task for 2022 more bearable. By contributing the 17th success to The Crowdsourced Deathlist, Bob Dole might finally know what it’s like to be part of a winning team… Bob Dole likes this!

[Death Impends 7,975]

On 31/12/2020 at 18:50, Joey Russ said:

Well, there’s 10 minutes left to go, and as such it is time to reveal the drops, DQs, and Near Misses: 

Drops: Harry Reid, Lata Mangeshkar, Desmond Tutu

 

Lata Mangeshkar needs her watch her step for the next couple days

[Joey Russ 7,227]

1 minute ago, Death Impends said:

 

Lata Mangeshkar needs her watch her step for the next couple days

See? Turns out even the forum has stupid drops of their own.  

[The Old Crem 3,602]

Betty White the final hit here.