Room 101

[Canadian Paul 93]

I went to a fish restaurant in Messina, Sicily a few years ago. The meals that ended up on the table were incredibly fresh, I saw an eel skinned alive and thrown in to the frying pan, still writhing. On the same night I saw the chef pick a live octopus out of a fish tank, chop off two of it's legs for his fish soup and then put it back in the tank for the next time it was needed. The food was delicious.

 

I feel that with all this animal welfare shite circulating, fish get a raw deal.

 

I was watching a television programme called 'Trawlermen' (don't know if it local television or what) and it showed the fish being gutted whilst still alive. Nothing is said. sh*t happens. Imagine if someone skinned a rabbit alive? At least they get killed first.

Also - lobsters. Thrown into a pan of boiling water. Some people do take a compasionate viewpoint with lobsters. Instead of throwing them into the boiling water, they shove them in the freezer for a couple of hours and then throw them into boiling water - alive.

Even rod fishing is a bit brutal. I can remember the few days I was encouraged to go fishing on the pier/rockside. First, the poor fish gets a hook stuck in its mouth and is dragged out of the water by that hook. Were that not enough torture, I was always encouraged to 'stun' the fish by battering it off the head. I'd take the line and swing the fish to the wall/ground so that the impact would stun it. I don't think many were still alive when they were thrown back.

 

Perhaps I could be the founding member of the RSPCF?

 

I thought fish couldn't feel pain, as they didn't have the propoer neural receptors, which is why they continue to lash about even when caught on a fisherman's hook. I'm pulling this from memory (I'd be too lazy to check Wikipedia even if it were working for me at the moment), but I believe that's why the Animal Rights activists only oppose fishing and gutting et. al on principle of not killing animals rather than actively seeking to stop the practices. Bigger fish to fry, so to speak, if the fish don't feel the pain.

 

I'm not sure about lobsters and octopi though.

[Madame Defarge 21]

I don't know about lobsters either. The other day a man was buying a dozen live lobsters in the fish section

and the last one was a big brawny one, probably the alpha male of his group. He put up a mighty struggle.

I was standing on line to buy flounder but when I got it home and was frying it up all I could think about was that poor lobster. I know, it doesn't make sense.

[Slave to the Grave 22]

E-cards

[Windsor 2,143]

Surely you would feel your guts getting scooped out?

Mind you, being suffocated in a net can't be too much fun either.

 

I'm going to gut a dolphin. That's a fish.

[Monoclinic 39]

Surely you would feel your guts getting scooped out?

Mind you, being suffocated in a net can't be too much fun either.

 

I'm going to gut a dolphin. That's a fish.

 

I thought it was a mammal albeit an aquatic one!

 

I think the jury is out on whether fish have feelings or not. Typical biologists.

[Windsor 2,143]

Surely you would feel your guts getting scooped out?

Mind you, being suffocated in a net can't be too much fun either.

 

I'm going to gut a dolphin. That's a fish.

 

I thought it was a mammal albeit an aquatic one!

 

I think the jury is out on whether fish have feelings or not. Typical biologists.

 

It has fins, a tail and swims in the ocean. Therefore, it is a fish.

Just like Whales.

[Tempus Fugit 212]

.

[Madame Defarge 21]

Just don't catch more than you can eat.

[honez 79]

I'm going to gut a dolphin. That's a fish.

I thought it was a mammal albeit an aquatic one!

It has fins, a tail and swims in the ocean. Therefore, it is a fish.

Just like Whales.

I think you'll find Wales is a country, not a fish.

Jellyfish on the other hand, don't have fins or a tail and are quite obviously fish.

They are also one of the main ingredients in pork pies. Probably.

And, as this is the internet and will be soon Googlefied, it's got to be true.

[Death Watch Beatle 40]

I'm going to gut a dolphin. That's a fish.

I thought it was a mammal albeit an aquatic one!

It has fins, a tail and swims in the ocean. Therefore, it is a fish.

Just like Whales.

I think you'll find Wales is a country, not a fish.

Jellyfish on the other hand, don't have fins or a tail and are quite obviously fish.

They are also one of the main ingredients in pork pies. Probably.

And, as this is the internet and will be soon Googlefied, it's got to be true.

 

Or is Wales a Principality?

 

DWB

[Monoclinic 39]

Where does the humble squid fit into the fish, banana, sheep republic conundrum. After all squids are a subject I am quite endeared to?

[To die for 3]

Where does the humble squid fit into the fish, banana, sheep republic conundrum. After all squids are a subject I am quite endeared to?

I'm going mad....I was sure I just read "sheep republic condom"

[Windsor 2,143]

Someome ought to reopen the what-is-and-what-is-not-a-fish debate.

Jellyfish should be renamed - jelly creatures, or something.

[Guest Floundering]

Someome ought to reopen the what-is-and-what-is-not-a-fish debate.

Jellyfish should be renamed - jelly creatures, or something.

 

A silverfish is not a fish. It's an insect. And it was also a 1980s/90s band. As was Jellyfish.

[Anubis the Jackal 76]

Pike and Tina Tuna? Bob Marlin and the Whalers? Grilled Scotch-Herring?

 

 

 

I've played this game before.

[harrymcnallysblueandwhitearmy 1,464]

Pike and Tina Tuna? Bob Marlin and the Whalers? Grilled Scotch-Herring?

 

 

 

I've played this game before.

 

We sure have, o Lord of the Masterbags. I think it may have all started with Gene Shark's 1974 lost classic No Blubber...

[Captain Oates 21]

Council Tax

[Yogi Bear 0]

Magpies

 

I was happily chewing a bone in my front garden this afternoon when 2 of the buggers decided to land on the grass and spend the next couple of hours watching me closely, they walked circles round me checking I was still eating, then I went into my domain for my dinner, they decided to help themselves, fortunately I eat quickly and was back out in time to chase them off before they ate too much, still it was my snack and I don't appreciate the cheeky gits helping themselves . Perhaps you lot could persuade the powers that be to outlaw Magpies??

[Lord Fellatio Nelson 6,132]

Due to an old wives tale told to me in childhood, I still salute the bastards every time I see them.

The chances of outlawing Magpies is as good as trying to knit fog.

Sorry.

[Monoclinic 39]

Due to an old wives tale told to me in childhood, I still salute the bastards every time I see them.

The chances of outlawing Magpies is as good as trying to knit fog.

Sorry.

 

Like this perchance?

 

Good morning* Mr Magpie, How's your wife?

 

*adjust accordingly of course.

[Lord Fellatio Nelson 6,132]

Nope, just a "Good Morning Sir" usually suffices.

How can you possibly expect me to sex an overgrown pigeon from a distance

[Banshees Scream 107]

Nope, just a "Good Morning Sir" usually suffices.

How can you possibly expect me to sex an overgrown pigeon from a distance

 

Go in the bushes.

[honez 79]

How can you possibly expect me to sex an overgrown pigeon from a distance

Orally and rapidly, Fellatio. There's a good man.

[Lord Fellatio Nelson 6,132]

How can you possibly expect me to sex an overgrown pigeon from a distance

Orally and rapidly, Fellatio. There's a good man.

 

It may well be standard practice "Down Under" to sex a Dingo by fellating its danglies but we dont sex birds orally here matey!!

Having said that, if you were to go and work on a Turkey farm here, you may well be required to extract the "LoveJuice" from Mr Turkey to artificially inseminate Mrs Turkey.

The fine line between when to suck and when not to is apparently something you learn to do very , very quickly.....................

Regards

LFN

[Windsor 2,143]

I'm thinking about putting my big mouth into room 101.

 

Yes, I'm afraid I've done it again. I've said too much to the wrong people.

 

It all started on Saturday evening at work. My usual workmate had a day off so I was working with another employee. We both loathe each other basically because I hate his entire family who used to dominate my work (until the dynasty fell). Anyway, we were speaking and it emerged that he was cooking supper for himself and a female companion (he is 16 and more and I was pretty sure it was dinner with a faghag of his). Anyway, he did not give the name of his companion and he said I would probably know who it was.

 

So I guessed, and was right. He thought that I liked this person, but I utterly detest her. So I went into rant mode telling him that she was a whore and a hypocrite amongst other things. I have reason to say these things for many reasons:

 

1: She is only 14 and puts herself around a bit.

2: She is part of the God squad and is, as I mentioned earlier, a complete whore.

3: Her mother is my sub-boss in charge of the domestic and kitchen sides of the firm. The entire domestic side had hours cut back a year ago which have never been restored. In the mean time, her mother has created a new shift for her daughter which allows her to work after school.

 

For all thse reasons - I hate her with a passion.

 

Anyway, so I said all this to him raging on as normal.

 

Tonight I find out that they are now an item. Therefore, everything that I said to him has most definately moved on to her and most probably her mother, my sub-boss. All in all, this means that I have 3 of my superiors against me:

 

1: The 16 year old boys mother who works in the office.

2: The whore's mother who runs all thing domestic, including cover.

3: The head cook who is married to my cousin who we don't talk to.

 

All in all, it may be a good idea for me to rethink my employment at that particular firm. If I do end up going, I will be going with a bang. I will not take any unfair treatment lying down (much to the whore's disappointment).