Richard Hammond

[football_fan 42]

I KNEW THE WORLD CONTAINED PLENTY OF TOTAL WEIRDO TWATS, BUT THIS SITE IS BEYOND ANY LEVEL OF STUPIDITY I COULD EVER IMAGINE! BUNCH OF LONELY FRIENDLESS IDIOTS! GET A F*****g HOBBY!

 

Lets see you fare according to the RFC 616 award

1. [0] The post states that the members of DeathList.net are sick.
   
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The DLRI of this post is (7/25)*100 = 28. Must try harder.

 

PS to Mat: The Internet is a very vast place. There is no need to get yourself worked up over a website that you knowingly and willingly clicked on. You must have seen the words deathlist.net, so I would assume that you are intelligent enough to know what to expect. Obviously this one captivated you enough to not just read through a thread, but to also post a response. If you don't like it, just click the little arrow on the top left hand corner of the screen. Good riddance!

[One shot Paddy 1,206]

He is able to walk and may be moved to a general medical ward shortly

[Vinegar Tits 606]

Well, if nothing else, it's attracted a few more drive-by ranters to the place, something that had been distinctly lacking of late.

 

As for the land speed record, doesn't it only officially count if it's been properly recorded? The Hamster apparently did 315mph on a test run before but that won't count as it wasn't the actual attempt.

 

As for his injuries, 'brain injury' is somewhat different to 'brain damage' - you can call a slight bump to the head a 'brain injury' for example. Any actual damage will be assessed in the weeks and months to come, though by what has already been reported it sounds like he's been very lucky indeed.

 

Fantastic article by Sir Jezza C here by the way, well worth a read.

[Vinegar Tits 606]

And why would I want Brian May and Roger Taylor dead exactly? Are they terrosists, murderers, kidnappers? No. They are musicians.

I do wish they'd stop raping the legacy of Queen though. John Deacon has the right idea in my opinion.

[M.Lawrenson 11]

As for his injuries, 'brain injury' is somewhat different to 'brain damage' - you can call a slight bump to the head a 'brain injury' for example. Any actual damage will be assessed in the weeks and months to come, though by what has already been reported it sounds like he's been very lucky indeed.

 

'Brain damage' is the sort of injury that Phineas Gage received. If want to know about luck, he's the man...

[maryportfuncity 10,646]

Re speed records, however fast he was going there were no official timekeepers there. Records count when they're achieved within the rules. So - for example - there's little doubt that if Donald Campbell had finished his fatal run in Bluebird in 1967 he'd have broken the world water speed record and taken it over 300 mph. He averaged just under 300 on the first run but was estimated to have been doing close to 330 when the boat somsersaulted, I don't know if the thought of his record, or one of the turbine blades were the last thing to go through his mind. Either way, he crashed short of the end of his measured mile and was credited wi' nowt.

[Tempus Fugit 214]

Where's a Moderator when you need one.

 

Copious blank posts now deleted - DWB

[TLC 9]

You lot are sick f**ks and need to get proper lives than placing bets and commenting on people and when you want them to die.

 

this was an accident - and all you lot can think about is hoping he will die, or wishing it was another presenter-

 

 

 

All i wana say is you lot are complete cocks and are a disgrace to society.

 

Get a F*****g life and stop pissing about on your shitty little forum.

 

TOSSERS THE LOT OF YOU

 

I love these guys.

 

If the site is so "little" and "shitty" why did you bother to waste your precious time to read any of it. And even more post something!

 

At least the site pressed a enough buttons on you sir/madam to stimulate a response. Great!!!

 

 

I KNEW THE WORLD CONTAINED PLENTY OF TOTAL WEIRDO TWATS, BUT THIS SITE IS BEYOND ANY LEVEL OF STUPIDITY I COULD EVER IMAGINE! BUNCH OF LONELY FRIENDLESS IDIOTS! GET A F*****g HOBBY!

MY hobby is this site, what shall I do?

[honez 79]

MY hobby is this site, what shall I do?

I think our esteemed ranter is suggesting that your hobby is debase, whereas theirs--seeking out fora they haven't read but they think they'll disagree with, post rants without merit, wit or intelligence, and sneak back in later to continue these non-sensical rants with anyone that bothered to notice their vaccuous posts--well, I'm sure that's what our poster thinks is the sort of fine and upstanding pastime that put the Great in Britain and made The Empire the magnificent beast it was.

So, TLC, do your duty; search out those fora and try out this wholesome new hobby instead of your sordid old one. I suggest you might like to start on the BBC's Top Gear site.

[maryportfuncity 10,646]

Top Gear may go if our man can't get his chops together or if those nasty safety conscious fascists tighten up the rules, or summat.

[Saint Peter 14]

You lot are sick f**ks and need to get proper lives than placing bets and commenting on people and when you want them to die.

 

this was an accident - and all you lot can think about is hoping he will die, or wishing it was another presenter-

 

 

 

All i wana say is you lot are complete cocks and are a disgrace to society.

 

Get a F*****g life and stop pissing about on your shitty little forum.

 

TOSSERS THE LOT OF YOU

 

I love these guys.

 

If the site is so "little" and "shitty" why did you bother to waste your precious time to read any of it. And even more post something!

 

At least the site pressed a enough buttons on you sir/madam to stimulate a response. Great!!!

 

 

I KNEW THE WORLD CONTAINED PLENTY OF TOTAL WEIRDO TWATS, BUT THIS SITE IS BEYOND ANY LEVEL OF STUPIDITY I COULD EVER IMAGINE! BUNCH OF LONELY FRIENDLESS IDIOTS! GET A F*****g HOBBY!

 

You're right I need a hobby... However upsetting people such as you gives me such a laugh I have no time for a hobby.

 

So here's the question... What hobby would take 5 minutes a day? That's all the time have free

[Bijou in Queen's Crown 2]

And why would I want Brian May and Roger Taylor dead exactly? Are they terrosists, murderers, kidnappers? No. They are musicians.

I do wish they'd stop raping the legacy of Queen though. John Deacon has the right idea in my opinion.

 

 

Well if you did your research properly, Brian and Roger tecnically began Queen. Then Freddie came and John joined last.

[DevonDeathTrip 2,358]

And why would I want Brian May and Roger Taylor dead exactly? Are they terrosists, murderers, kidnappers? No. They are musicians.

I do wish they'd stop raping the legacy of Queen though. John Deacon has the right idea in my opinion.

 

 

Well if you did your research properly, Brian and Roger tecnically began Queen. Then Freddie came and John joined last.

 

If you has conducted your investigations properly, you'd know Brian and Roger were in a group called Smile. It wasn't until Freddie came along that the band name of Queen was first suggested.

I think Vinegar Tits has a fair point of view, shared by many. Don't these two men have enough money in the bank to prevent them from going back on the road with a karaoke version of Queen?

 

What did happen to John Deacon anyway, not a murmer since the early 1990s? He hasn't got some degenerative disease we don't know about has he ?

[maryportfuncity 10,646]

Re the John joining last; Over the years I've crossed paths work wise with a guy who makes films and used to make kitchens until an accident left him unable to do so. Years ago the same man was a bass player and auditioned for Queen before Freddie arrived. He left it a day or two, turned it over in his mind and rang them turning down the job.

 

But he's doing all right, his girlfriend brings him a cup of tea in bed every morning, screams 'Tosser' and throws it in his face.

[Star Crossed 33]

So here's the question... What hobby would take 5 minutes a day? That's all the time (I?) have free

Does masturbation count as a hobby?

 

I mean, it's not really one that you could show off to your friends, or join a club for, (although I'm sure there must be online forums where you can discuss it) but it'll fill 5 minutes of your day quite nicely.

 

p.s. this Hammond nonsense is almost as irritating as the ubiquity of his "cheeky chirpy chappy" voice. He'll be driving Lamborghinis again by next week, you mark my words; there's nothing wrong with him, unfortunately. Stick an elastoplast on the drama queen and send him home, ffs. Or shove him in a tank full of angry stingrays, whichever is the easier.

Imagine if he'd died; hoards of middle-class mourners creating a Sunday-morning memorial tailback on the M25 in their reasonably-priced saloons, BMWs, Subaru Imprezas, MPVs and Chelsea tractors; it would make Steve Irwin's death look like the ignominious demise of some nameless, forgotten vagrant in a squalid squat on the outskirts of a big, windy, northern city.

[maryportfuncity 10,646]

Writing Haiku, 17 syllable poems. Links well to the last suggestion since many people disposed to haiku get labelled tossers.

[Star Crossed 33]

Writing Haiku, 17 syllable poems. Links well to the last suggestion since many people disposed to haiku get labelled tossers.

Here is a Haiku

To discuss masturbation

Masturbation's fun

[TLC 9]

Writing Haiku, 17 syllable poems. Links well to the last suggestion since many people disposed to haiku get labelled tossers.

Here is a Haiku

To discuss masturbation

Masturbation's fun

That's not bad SC

Though this one is much better

But I would say that

[Star Crossed 33]

Writing Haiku, 17 syllable poems. Links well to the last suggestion since many people disposed to haiku get labelled tossers.

Here is a Haiku

To discuss masturbation

Masturbation's fun

That's not bad SC

Though this one is much better

But I would say that

What do you know, eh?

Your Haiku stinks of dog-doo!

Mine was the shiznit.

[Magere Hein 1,400]

Writing Haiku, 17 syllable poems. Links well to the last suggestion since many people disposed to haiku get labelled tossers.

Here is a Haiku

To discuss masturbation

Masturbation's fun

That's not bad SC

Though this one is much better

But I would say that

What do you know, eh?

Your Haiku stinks of dog-doo!

Mine was the shiznit.

Haiku's for tossers

Just like the cherry blossom

In the market square

 

regards,

Hein

[Guest Guest]

Writing Haiku, 17 syllable poems. Links well to the last suggestion since many people disposed to haiku get labelled tossers.

Here is a Haiku

To discuss masturbation

Masturbation's fun

That's not bad SC

Though this one is much better

But I would say that

What do you know, eh?

Your Haiku stinks of dog-doo!

Mine was the shiznit.

Haiku's for tossers

Just like the cherry blossom

In the market square

 

regards,

Hein

 

Misplaced Childhood, Hein?

[Clive's NOT Dunn 7]

Writing Haiku, 17 syllable poems. Links well to the last suggestion since many people disposed to haiku get labelled tossers.

Here is a Haiku

To discuss masturbation

Masturbation's fun

That's not bad SC

Though this one is much better

But I would say that

What do you know, eh?

Your Haiku stinks of dog-doo!

Mine was the shiznit.

Haiku's for tossers

Just like the cherry blossom

In the market square

 

regards,

Hein

 

Misplaced Childhood, Hein?

 

Try again as me!

 

Misplaced Childhood, Hein?

 

I've been away, rumours of death greatly exaggerated and all that.

[Magere Hein 1,400]

Writing Haiku, 17 syllable poems. Links well to the last suggestion since many people disposed to haiku get labelled tossers.

Here is a Haiku

To discuss masturbation

Masturbation's fun

That's not bad SC

Though this one is much better

But I would say that

What do you know, eh?

Your Haiku stinks of dog-doo!

Mine was the shiznit.

Haiku's for tossers

Just like the cherry blossom

In the market square

Misplaced Childhood, Hein?

Several.

 

regards,

Hein

[Clive's NOT Dunn 7]

Writing Haiku, 17 syllable poems. Links well to the last suggestion since many people disposed to haiku get labelled tossers.

Here is a Haiku

To discuss masturbation

Masturbation's fun

That's not bad SC

Though this one is much better

But I would say that

What do you know, eh?

Your Haiku stinks of dog-doo!

Mine was the shiznit.

Haiku's for tossers

Just like the cherry blossom

In the market square

Misplaced Childhood, Hein?

Several.

 

regards,

Hein

 

Marillions in fact.

[Alphonsin 1]

He's just been moved to a hospital nearer to his family. He was transferred by helicopter.

Helicopter?

Remind me, where did his family ask concerned fans to send money to before he came round...?

He's going to save a lot of money on minicabs in coming years.