Things To Do While Waiting For Death... 2007

[Tempus Fugit 214]

Pleasing, but slightly disturbing.

[themaninblack 2,112]

Pleasing, but slightly disturbing.

 

 

He's Back!!!

[Banshees Scream 110]

Pleasing, but slightly disturbing.

 

It's good to see you back Tempus Fugit.

[Canadian Paul 97]

Pleasing, but slightly disturbing.

 

 

He's Back!!!

 

Shhhhh.... you'll scare him off again!

[Canadian Paul 97]

Go Beyond Grandpa. And for the daring, go even further beyond Grandpa with Beyond Grandpa II.

[maryportfuncity 10,647]

Take stupid pictures of animals dressed up in human clothing.

[harrymcnallysblueandwhitearmy 1,689]

Since there doesn't appear to be one entitled Art Critics Wanking Alongside Statues of Christ While Being Filmed by Ridiculously-Moustachioed Surrealists, I guess this would be as good a thread as any in which to point out a potentially interesting documentary on Channel 4 tomorrow night.

[maryportfuncity 10,647]

Since there doesn't appear to be one entitled Art Critics Wanking Alongside Statues of Christ While Being Filmed by Ridiculously-Moustachioed Surrealists, I guess this would be as good a thread as any in which to point out a potentially interesting documentary on Channel 4 tomorrow night.

 

 

Read summat about this in the paper today, we've only got Sewell's word for it mind, he suggests the camera had no film and that Dali got his rocks off this way.

[harrymcnallysblueandwhitearmy 1,689]

Since there doesn't appear to be one entitled Art Critics Wanking Alongside Statues of Christ While Being Filmed by Ridiculously-Moustachioed Surrealists, I guess this would be as good a thread as any in which to point out a potentially interesting documentary on Channel 4 tomorrow night.

 

 

Read summat about this in the paper today, we've only got Sewell's word for it mind, he suggests the camera had no film and that Dali got his rocks off this way.

 

Yes, exactly what it says in the article for which I provided a link.

[To die for 3]

Get a tattoo.

Just scroll down.........

[DevonDeathTrip 2,358]

Patrick Knight is due to be executed on June 26th. To help him pass the time, he would like as many jokes as possible emailed to him. A friend has set up a myspace page for him here

[harrymcnallysblueandwhitearmy 1,689]

Patrick Knight is due to be executed on June 26th. To help him pass the time, he would like as many jokes as possible emailed to him. A friend has set up a myspace page for him here

 

This'll make him die laughing:

 

Three women are about to be executed. One's a brunette, one's a redhead, and one's a blonde.

The guard brings the brunette forward and the executioner asks if she has any last requests. She says no and the executioner shouts, "Ready!...Aim!! ..."

 

Suddenly the brunette yells, "EARTHQUAKE!!!" Everyone is startled and looks around. She escapes.

 

The guard brings the redhead forward and the executioner asks if she has any last requests. She say no and the executioner shouts, "Ready! ... Aim!!..."

 

Suddenly the redhead yells, "TORNADO!!!" Everyone is startled and looks around. She escapes.

 

By now the blonde has it all figured out. The guard brings her forward and the executioner asks if she has any last requests. She says no and the executioner shouts, Ready! ... Aim!! ..."

 

...and the blonde yells, "FIRE!!!"

 

or even...

 

Once upon a time there lived three men: a doctor, a chemist, and an engineer. For some reason all three offended the king and were sentenced to die on the same day.

 

The day of the execution arrived, and the doctor was led up to the guillotine.

 

As he strapped the doctor to the guillotine, the executioner asked, "Head up or head down?"

 

"Head up," said the doctor.

 

"Blindfold or no blindfold?"

 

"No blindfold."

 

So the executioner raised the axe, and z-z-z-z-ing! Down came the blade--and stopped barely an inch above the doctor's neck. Well, the law stated that if an execution didn't succeed the first time the prisoner had to be released, so the doctor was set free.

 

Then the chemist was led up to the guillotine.

 

"Head up or head down?" said the executioner.

 

"Head up."

 

"Blindfold or no blindfold?"

 

"No blindfold."

 

So the executioner raised his axe, and z-z-z-z-ing! Down came the blade--and stopped an inch above the chemist's neck. Well, the law stated that if the execution didn't succeed the first time the prisoner had to be released, so the chemist was set free.

 

Finally the engineer was led up to the guillotine.

 

"Head up or head down?"

 

"Head up."

 

"Blindfold or no blindfold?"

 

"No blindfold."

 

So the executioner raised his axe, but before he could cut the rope, the engineer yelled out:

 

"WAIT! I see what the problem is!".

 

And last but not least...

 

Q: What was Saddam's last word?

A: Shiiiite

[CarolAnn 926]

I'm sure that will entertain the five people (including Knight) scheduled for execution in Texas this month. It will be interesting to see if the woman gets the needle.

[Banshees Scream 110]

Get A Life

[maryportfuncity 10,647]

a sport utterly lacking in charisma and - basically - a combination of eccentricity, mild athleticism and and impracticality. Britain, of course, leads the world in it.

 

Oh aye, and other things to do whilst waiting, overtake Tempus and take second place in the all time posting list. Something Banshees will achieve with one more post.

[Guest Baker Filecake]

Plan your Prison Survival Strategy, in case you should ever receive a custodial sentence.

[Monoclinic 39]

Plan your Prison Survival Strategy, in case you should ever receive a custodial sentence.

 

...creamy white ass churned into butter.

 

I've not heard that euphamism before!

 

I think he needs to devise a how to survive the mental asylum guide for when he imminently gets sectioned. Or alternatively try living a little instead of fantasizing about being marooned in the mountains with some South American war lord eying up his creamy gringo ass.

[Guest The Late Herbert Kornfeld]

Plan your Prison Survival Strategy, in case you should ever receive a custodial sentence.

 

...creamy white ass churned into butter.

 

I've not heard that euphamism before!

 

I think he needs to devise a how to survive the mental asylum guide for when he imminently gets sectioned. Or alternatively try living a little instead of fantasizing about being marooned in the mountains with some South American war lord eying up his creamy gringo ass.

 

Can there still be people out there who don't know what the Onion is?

[maryportfuncity 10,647]

Bohemian Rhapsody! How many seconds of this sh*t can you stand before you turn it off?

[Monoclinic 39]

Plan your Prison Survival Strategy, in case you should ever receive a custodial sentence.

 

...creamy white ass churned into butter.

 

I've not heard that euphamism before!

 

I think he needs to devise a how to survive the mental asylum guide for when he imminently gets sectioned. Or alternatively try living a little instead of fantasizing about being marooned in the mountains with some South American war lord eying up his creamy gringo ass.

 

Can there still be people out there who don't know what the Onion is?

 

Obviously me! I didn't even look at the address, even if I had done I have never heard of the onion.

Is it some kind of Private Eye vs National Enquirer then? Should I be looking up the word gullible to see if it has been taken out of the dictionary? Sorry. Though I shall file the quote about churning creamy asses for future reference.

[CarolAnn 926]

The Onion is satire.

[Lady Die 63]

Eat frogs

[maryportfuncity 10,647]

Squat.

[Lady Die 63]

Discuss roads zzzzzzzzzzzzzz

[Godot 149]