What are you doing to kill the boredom.

[Lord Fellatio Nelson 6,218]

2 hours ago, Bentrovato said:

Any ideas out there on cheap buy as you see degrees. By the end of this there will be thousands upon thousands of people who will need help. Now how do I get a fast track Gillian McKeith type online degree so I can counsel all these people through their problems. The main will be marriage/relationship counselling and the rest will be PTSD going by the usual UK standards of their ability to cope with anything. Any ideas? This is not a cynical ploy. This is a way of helping people get back into normal life and keeping the social and economic structure of the country going. There is also a fortune in no interest overdrafts to be made out there.  They must use them to keep the banks, and our  future, going.

Gillian McKeith is a charlatan with a fetish for digging through shite with the end of her pencil.

I don't think she is a shining example of fast track 'buy as you see' degrees.

A cheap degree is no degree.

[Bentrovato 1,087]

40 minutes ago, Lord Fellatio Nelson said:

Gillian McKeith is a charlatan with a fetish for digging through shite with the end of her pencil.

I don't think she is a shining example of fast track 'buy as you see' degrees.

A cheap degree is no degree.

That is the entire point. I was taking the piss. God help me. Trying to put some black humour into all of this obviously has not worked. Time to go back to winding up the local members of the Church of Latter Day Saints. Or the Jehovahs. Whichever I can find first. 

[Lord Fellatio Nelson 6,218]

Just now, Bentrovato said:

That is the entire point. I was taking the piss. God help me. Trying to put some black humour into all of this obviously has not worked. Time to go back to winding up the local members of the Church of Latter Day Saints. Or the Jehovahs. Whichever I can find first. 

It's ok, as you were.

I have an excuse, not a big excuse but I do have one.

[Bentrovato 1,087]

7 minutes ago, Lord Fellatio Nelson said:

It's ok, as you were.

I have an excuse, not a big excuse but I do have one.

Get on with it then. I have six more series of the X Files to watch and the works of Colette to read. 

[Toast 16,130]

5 hours ago, Bentrovato said:

Any ideas out there on cheap buy as you see degrees. By the end of this there will be thousands upon thousands of people who will need help. Now how do I get a fast track Gillian McKeith type online degree so I can counsel all these people through their problems. The main will be marriage/relationship counselling and the rest will be PTSD going by the usual UK standards of their ability to cope with anything. Any ideas? This is not a cynical ploy. This is a way of helping people get back into normal life and keeping the social and economic structure of the country going. There is also a fortune in no interest overdrafts to be made out there.  They must use them to keep the banks, and our  future, going.

 

I thought everybody had a degree these days.

[Deathray 2,940]

4 minutes ago, Toast said:

 

I thought everybody had a degree these days.

 

Not everybody does... Toast.....

 

At least mines not in wiping my arse like yours...

[Toast 16,130]

19 minutes ago, Deathray said:

 

Not everybody does... Toast.....

At least mines not in wiping my arse like yours...

 

Funny you should say that. 

When I was at university (proper university, before they renamed all the polys and tech colleges as universities) there was a famous piece of graffiti in the toilets in the library cafeteria.  Next to the bog roll, someone had written

"Sociology Degrees - Please Take One"

[Deathray 2,940]

1 minute ago, Toast said:

 

Funny you should say that. 

When I was at university (proper university, before they renamed all the polys and tech colleges as universities) there was a famous piece of graffiti in the toilets in the library cafeteria.  Next to the bog roll, someone had written

"Sociology Degrees - Please Take One"

 

All that tells me is your so old you could fit a morris minor up your fanny....

[Toast 16,130]

1 minute ago, Deathray said:

All that tells me is your so old you could fit a morris minor up your fanny....

 

Morris Minors were very sought after in those days.

[Lord Fellatio Nelson 6,218]

47 minutes ago, Toast said:

 

Morris Minors were very sought after in those days.

They still are Toastie.

[Boudicca 702]

I said that the British actually ran away at Dunkirk and got rakes of outraged responses from Londoners who are supposed to be working from home earning six figures. 

 

Was only joking but seriously, nine paragraph Facebook comments? TLDR. GTF. Deleted it in the end and called one to calm him the fuck down. Easy for me but..

 

...it is getting to folk I think.

 

**I also have 128 voicemails now. Possibly related.

 

[Bentrovato 1,087]

Right. Next money making idea. Is there a list out there of second homes which cannot be used in the current crisis. Because if we can get to them they can be stripped of anything valuable and the police have other things to do than check on some rich fucks country play place. 

[Lord Fellatio Nelson 6,218]

1 minute ago, Bentrovato said:

Right. Next money making idea. Is there a list out there of second homes which cannot be used in the current crisis. Because if we can get to them they can be stripped of anything valuable and the police have other things to do than check on some rich fucks country play place. 

The boredom is really taking hold now, isn't it.

[Bentrovato 1,087]

5 minutes ago, Lord Fellatio Nelson said:

The boredom is really taking hold now, isn't it.

During the Blitz crime went up 57%. Now I think it is up to all of us to regain that Blitz spirit and surpass it. For Queen and country etc. 

 

[Lord Fellatio Nelson 6,218]

Just now, Bentrovato said:

During the Blitz crime went up 57%. Now I think it is up to all of us to regain that Blitz spirit and surpass it. For Queen and country etc. 

 

Yeah but we are not allowed out.

Maybe I could vandalise the house and threaten the neighbours with a meat cleaver?

[Bentrovato 1,087]

4 minutes ago, Lord Fellatio Nelson said:

Yeah but we are not allowed out.

Maybe I could vandalise the house and threaten the neighbours with a meat cleaver?

Oh I understand. They have a lockdown on burglars all year round. Guess what. It does not work. They seem to go out. And burgle houses. Is this too complicated. I apologise for speaking in gaeilge.

[Lord Fellatio Nelson 6,218]

21 minutes ago, Bentrovato said:

Oh I understand. They have a lockdown on burglars all year round. Guess what. It does not work. They seem to go out. And burgle houses. Is this too complicated. I apologise for speaking in gaeilge.

I'm not a burglar.

[Youth in Asia 1,086]

Watching Return to Eden. A fantastic Aussie serial from the early 1980s that I remember watching back then.

[Boudicca 702]

I used to have the books. It was a tremendous series!

Kudos, YiA. 

 

Can I come over to yours, I don't own a television.

[Lord Fellatio Nelson 6,218]

15 minutes ago, Youth in Asia said:

Watching Return to Eden. A fantastic Aussie serial from the early 1980s that I remember watching back then.

Is that the one where a woman was attacked by a croc and has a big scar on her face?

I preferred Sons and Daughters and The Sullivans, which starred the Australian Queen of TV and Theatre Lorraine Bayly.

She is deffo obitable and will be due an Aussie state funeral, or summat.

[Lard Bazaar 3,799]

5 hours ago, Lord Fellatio Nelson said:

Yeah but we are not allowed out.

Maybe I could vandalise the house and threaten the neighbours with a meat cleaver?

My best mate’s dad chased a boy her sister was going out with all the way down College Road with a meat cleaver. 

[Bibliogryphon 9,570]

2 hours ago, Lord Fellatio Nelson said:

Is that the one where a woman was attacked by a croc and has a big scar on her face?

I preferred Sons and Daughters and The Sullivans, which starred the Australian Queen of TV and Theatre Lorraine Bayly.

She is deffo obitable and will be due an Aussie state funeral, or summat.

I think there is quite and overlap of cast between Sons & Daughters and Return to Eden iirc

[Boudicca 702]

My Dad is currently on his FOURTH polis warning / escort home.

 

That's how he's doing the shielding. Getting lifted. No virus is going in the way of Mr. Bou Snr and his need to buy The Daily Mail as and when.

 

I hope they throw away the key and I am delighted this is a crime now.

 

 

[Toast 16,130]

I've been literally shovelling shit.  The need has arisen to enrich the soil in our small veg patch.  Across the road there are allotments, and there is a large juicy pile of well-rotted horse manure deposited for the use of allotment holders, of whom I am not one.  So whenever the coast is clear I've been scooting over with barrow and shovel.  About four more excursions should suffice, I think.  Still, plenty more where it came from. 

[Deathray 2,940]

Winding up gullible fuckers on internet forums mostly!

 

Oh wait is life supposed to have changed due to this whole Covid thing?