Toast 16,141 Posted January 26, 2021 2 hours ago, maryportfuncity said: £1 is way too much though ..... should be something like 6d. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
maryportfuncity 10,647 Posted January 31, 2021 YouTube just offered me Spike Milligan's Pakistani Daleks. Very much of its time, you'd likely get a knock on the door for submitting this as a script in 2021 - 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Dead Wait 1,146 Posted February 2, 2021 What’s the opposite of isolate? yousoearly 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lord Fellatio Nelson 6,218 Posted February 16, 2021 What has 2 wings and an arrow? A Chinese telephone. "Wing, wing." "Arrow?" 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
maryportfuncity 10,647 Posted February 17, 2021 On 16/02/2021 at 19:43, Lord Fellatio Nelson said: What has 2 wings and an arrow? A Chinese telephone. "Wing, wing." "Arrow?" Aw fuckin' hell!! And similar dad-joke vein I said to my hairdresser, "Make me look sexy." So she started drinking. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Paul Bearer 6,102 Posted February 18, 2021 8 hours ago, maryportfuncity said: Aw fuckin' hell!! And similar dad-joke vein I said to my hairdresser, "Make me look sexy." So she started drinking. Is aid the same thing to mine. She switched the lights off. 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RIP Wee Jum 1,559 Posted February 19, 2021 How much does a hipster weigh ? An instagram 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lord Fellatio Nelson 6,218 Posted February 19, 2021 My hands were shaking so much when I performed my first circumcision, that I got the sack. 1 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lord Fellatio Nelson 6,218 Posted February 19, 2021 Got an e-mail saying 'Knock, Knock.' It was a Jehovah's witness working from home. 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lord Fellatio Nelson 6,218 Posted February 19, 2021 A man on the London underground taught his dog how to play the trumpet. He went from Barking to Tooting in just over an hour. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lord Fellatio Nelson 6,218 Posted February 19, 2021 Finally compromised and allowed my pet on the bed. It was restless for a few minutes then the goldfish finally settled down. 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lord Fellatio Nelson 6,218 Posted February 19, 2021 Wife's best friend asked me how I was going to make my wife go weak at the knees for valentine's? I said I'd hide her arthritis tablets Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TQR 14,398 Posted February 27, 2021 6 minutes ago, En Passant said: 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
En Passant 3,741 Posted February 27, 2021 Ah well, I'm getting old. 13 hours is 12 hours longer than I need to completely forget something. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lord Fellatio Nelson 6,218 Posted February 28, 2021 What has 4 legs and says 'boo' ? A cow with a cold Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lord Fellatio Nelson 6,218 Posted February 28, 2021 had my first cage fight yesterday. The chicken didn't know what hit it. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
maryportfuncity 10,647 Posted March 7, 2021 The obscurest vinyl page on FB is one of my favourite finds lately (fake covers for the recordings of sound-hound's wet dreams) I'm assuming one or two hereabouts will share my joy that someone crafts delights like this: 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
maryportfuncity 10,647 Posted March 12, 2021 As a sufferer of narcolepsy... 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites