Dead Ariel Sharon

[Phantom 2,533]

In addition to the machines keeping him alive, Sharon has undergone three brain operations, abdominal surgery, three minor surgical procedures...

...two turtle doves and a partridge in a pear tree.

 

It's about time this score was chalked up methinks

 

would be good if the family would just accept that there is no chance, then at least we can make space for someone else for next year

[maryportfuncity 10,647]

Blindingly obvious he's existing, not living. Can't we arrange a belated entry for one of his family - or someone in that medical team - for the CPDP?

[Banshees Scream 110]

would be good if the family would just accept that there is no chance, then at least we can make space for someone else for next year

 

Talking reality they say the odds of him recovering are like 10% or at least I think that I've read that somewhere. I feel it's time the family realizes the party is over and they should let this man pass into the afterlife. The guy practically died like a year and a half ago. I guess they will just wait it out and let time take it's toll on the situation.

[Guest Brain Dead Is 4eva]

Talking reality they say the odds of him recovering are like 10% or at least I think that I've read that somewhere...

 

Where did you read that? The Fortean Times?

[dave 0]

Under Israeli law they cant turn the life support machine off otherwise his sons would have given the green light to collect the old guys will money ages ago

[maryportfuncity 10,647]

Under Israeli law they cant turn the life support machine off otherwise his sons would have given the green light to collect the old guys will money ages ago

 

 

Yeah, but if this was the NHS some dipshit cleaner would probably unplug his life support by accident to plug in that big round thing that waxes the floor. Tragic and all, but - all in all - just an accident.

[halleluyahjohntudor 5]

Talking reality they say the odds of him recovering are like 10% or at least I think that I've read that somewhere...

 

Where did you read that? The Fortean Times?

 

Well worth a punt eh, BS?

[DevonDeathTrip 2,358]

I think Ariel Sharon should be ashamed of his carbon footprint. All those machines plugged in non stop for 18 months must have used a fair bit of electricity.

 

It's a disgrace. I think the hospital should have a power cut.

 

[Banshees Scream 110]

I think Ariel Sharon should be ashamed of his carbon footprint. All those machines plugged in non stop for 18 months must have used a fair bit of electricity.

 

It's a disgrace. I think the hospital should have a power cut.

 

 

Devon brother, hand me the scissors

 

I mean the family pays for this sh*t. They should stop being selfish.

 

This is f****n nuts! Imagine if this guy lives like another five years?

 

I almost want to protest :lol:

 

[honez 79]

I bet his family have got him pegged as their Joker for the 2008 DDP and they're just waiting for the new year.

Bastards.

[Guest σ=J\E]

Devon brother, hand me the scissors

 

I have some nice shiny metal scissors I can lend you.

[Banshees Scream 110]

[Canadian Paul 97]

 

I think you may have misunderstood this circumcision thing BS...

[Banshees Scream 110]

No you wouldn't get electrocuted. Not if you do it right. A Snip here

 

A snip there

 

Snip

 

Snip

 

Snip

 

And the electric bill drops 50%

[halleluyahjohntudor 5]

No you wouldn't get electrocuted. Not if you do it right. A Snip here

 

A snip there

 

Snip

 

Snip

 

Snip

 

And the electric bill drops 50%

 

What about the carbon footprint from your private limo, BS?

 

Not to mention the environmental cost of your home computer....

 

Snip, snip snip

[Dave to the Grave 11]

Some discussion on when is dead, dead.

[Star Crossed 33]

Some discussion on when is dead, dead.

Cheers for posting that, DttG. An interesting debate. I feel, however, that Professor Kellehear and Dr Richard Nicholson may be over-complicating things a tad...

 

Professor Kellehear said there was little apparent difference to the untrained observer between a person who was brain dead, and somebody who was asleep.

That would be why we have doctors. The major difference, imho, would be that brain-dead people can never be woken up. I suggest the time-honoured "Wake up and pass the biscuits" test, as used by countless stoned students throughout the ages, to determine whether someone is actually dead or just dead to the world:-

 

1) Make everyone a cup of tea.

2) Place a packet of biscuits on a table next to the patient (Ariel Sharon, for example and to stay roughly on-topic).

3) Ask the patient to pass you the biscuits. "Ariel, could you pass me the biscuits, dude..."

4) Repeat stage 2, only slightly louder. "ARIEL. Get with the programme, man, pass me a biscuit please."

5) Repeat stage 2, more forcefully: "ARIEL! DUDE! WAKE UP and pass the biscuits, maaan..."

6) Throw something (probably a cigarette lighter) at the patient's forehead.

7) If there is still no response, and you have to get the biscuits yourself, Ariel is, I'm sorry to say, dead.

 

He said the situation was further complicated by the fact that one in 1,000 people who are brain dead survive when life-support machines are switched off.

Ok, fair enough, there's a 1/1000 chance of them being able to wake up and pass the biscuits, apparently, so...

 

8) Switch off any life support machines which happen to be attached to the patient. If the patient still appears to be breathing;

9) Repeat stages 5 and 6. If there is still no chance of the biscuits being passed, proceed to stage 10.

10) Harvest his organs.

 

I would argue that these should be social decisions. To better inform these decisions, we need a closer look at the social implications of brain death.

I would argue that the decision should be solely a medical one, to stop people needlessly keeping corpses alive for reasons which are purely social.

 

There has never been a really serious national debate about whether this is socially acceptable, or just medical pragmatism. I suspect it does create real problems for an awful lot of relatives when they are asked if organs can be removed when the patient's heart is still beating.

There has never been a "serious national debate", Richard, because most of the nation are not trained medical practitioners. I suspect it would create real problems if everyone were allowed to keep dead relatives "alive" on "life-support" machines, just so they could go and visit them every so often. It conjurs up visions of huge warehouses full of brain-dead but "alive" people, sort of like a "living" cemetery, being visited by relatives and friends. If someone's spouse, for example, were to be declared brain dead, maybe the living partner, still finding their loved one attractive, could have the odd "conjugal visit" now and then; I would imagine, however, that this may be rather awkward for the other relatives in the ward.

 

In conclusion, if

x) There is no meaningful electrical activity in the brain, and

y) They can't wake up and pass the f*****g biscuits, they're dead. Accept it.

 

I had more to say on this subject, and was going to draw a flow chart to simplify the test process for you, but I have some work to do. Not much, but some.

[halleluyahjohntudor 5]

Wouldn't the SC test be a little unfair on patients lying in biscuit-free rooms? Or, more seriously, what if the patient had just woken up and devoured every available biscuit. His/her failure to comply with the request could surely not be taken as a token of cranial inactivity?

[CarolAnn 926]

Wouldn't the SC test be a little unfair on patients lying in biscuit-free rooms? Or, more seriously, what if the patient had just woken up and devoured every available biscuit. His/her failure to comply with the request could surely not be taken as a token of cranial inactivity?

 

If we didn't get an answer to the US equivalent of the biscuit test we usually dressed the poor unfortunately in some embarassing attire, staged him/her in an embarassing situation and took embarassing pictures which were then shared liberally and generally posted in the Student Union.

[Banshees Scream 110]

I just thought of the most essential headline for Ariel once his deal goes down.

 

UNPLUGGED!

[Guest Patrick Lal]

I just thought of the most essential headline for Ariel once his deal goes down.

 

UNPLUGGED!

kinda cruel with the UNPLUGGED THINGY.....

[Lord Fellatio Nelson 6,218]

I just thought of the most essential headline for Ariel once his deal goes down.

 

UNPLUGGED!

 

...or even "makes your whites whiter".

Which is as hysterically funny as your sublime gem BS.

[Real Madron 6]

Wouldn't the SC test be a little unfair on patients lying in biscuit-free rooms? Or, more seriously, what if the patient had just woken up and devoured every available biscuit. His/her failure to comply with the request could surely not be taken as a token of cranial inactivity?

 

If we didn't get an answer to the US equivalent of the biscuit test we usually dressed the poor unfortunately in some embarassing attire, staged him/her in an embarassing situation and took embarassing pictures which were then shared liberally and generally posted in the Student Union.

slightly off topic but has anyone seen the Justice Vs Simian video?

 

Award winning video showing various drunk/sleepy people waking up to find their friends have obviously done the biscuit test.

[dave 0]

Halloween (next month) is the 666th day that Ariel Sharon will be in his coma-(assuming he mnakes it that far)-what an appropriate day to die for him.Last halloween we lost one of his fellow mass murderers PW Botha so who knows we might get lucky again

[Guest me again]

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