VSBfromH 74 Posted July 2, 2007 I'm really pissed off!!! Someones just crashed into my car in one of them new Skodas,there is jam, chocolate, jelly and sponge everywhere!!! Nice one your Lordship. I got it anyway! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
maryportfuncity 10,642 Posted July 2, 2007 Nah, still struggling with that one, could someone - like - give me a clue? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Guest Posted July 2, 2007 here you go, mpfc http://youtube.com/watch?v=uwswkJZEdS4 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Guest_heaven can wait_* Posted July 2, 2007 The authorities have named the terrorist that was on fire today, He's called singe maheed Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lord Fellatio Nelson 6,218 Posted July 2, 2007 ..............................and the other one was called Madjeep Bhoma............... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
maryportfuncity 10,642 Posted July 3, 2007 What's the difference between a Scotsman and Halibut? A scotsman can't smoke at Glasgow Airport. Loads more where that came from here. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
maryportfuncity 10,642 Posted July 4, 2007 Nurses in Glasgow have said that the Halibut Jeep driver has started speaking,phrases like ' wee timorous curious beastie ' and 'a mans a man fer aw that'. He's in the serious Burns unit. Reet, I'm laying off the Glasgow terroritst jokes for........ooh.........a whole day! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Guest Posted July 4, 2007 Nurses in Glasgow have said that the Halibut Jeep driver has started speaking,phrases like ' wee timorous curious beastie ' and 'a mans a man fer aw that'. He's in the serious Burns unit. Reet, I'm laying off the Glasgow terroritst jokes for........ooh.........a whole day! ??? I don't get it like? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Windsor 2,233 Posted July 4, 2007 Nurses in Glasgow have said that the Halibut Jeep driver has started speaking,phrases like ' wee timorous curious beastie ' and 'a mans a man fer aw that'. He's in the serious Burns unit. Reet, I'm laying off the Glasgow terroritst jokes for........ooh.........a whole day! ??? I don't get it like? Burns the poet. Surprisingly popular with us Scots. I say 'surprisingly' because he was a tax collector (was he not?). Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Windsor 2,233 Posted July 5, 2007 I may be about a month too late with this, but did anyone notice the name of the winner of Britain's got talent? Paul Potts? Do you suppose his parents were fans of the brutal dictator Pol Pot? Almost as unfortunate as Mr. K. D. Fiddler... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Anubis the Jackal 77 Posted July 5, 2007 See his winning performance Sort of. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Real Madron 6 Posted July 5, 2007 i'm really pissed off. someone has crashed into my house in one of those new Skodas.. there's f*****g jam and sponge everywhere! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Windsor 2,233 Posted July 5, 2007 I'm sure that you are all sick fed up listening to me banging on about my work, but something extremely funny happened to day. I wasn't there sadly, but it sounds too funny. There is one particular girl who isn't too bright. She left school quite early without much in the way of qualifications. She is, quite frankly, a stereotypical blonde. Anyway, it came to break time and she was going to the shop which is just up the road. So before she went, she asked if anyone wanted anything. The head cook said yes, he did want something. He said he needed something for supper time. He told her he wanted a fallopian tube. He also told her that they didn't sell them in the front - they would be in the store. So he told her that she would have to ask for one at the counter. She actually did it. She walked into a shop, went to the counter, and asked if they had any fallopian tubes! Poor girl. She came back pretty pissed off. Christ knows what she thought it was. The disturbing thing is that I'm not joking. I've got to work with her tomorrow... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Advantage Windsor... Posted July 6, 2007 The disturbing thing is that I'm not joking. I've got to work with her tomorrow... Tell her you want to show her how we make babies... and that yes, men's thingies *are* usually shaped like that. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Windsor 2,233 Posted July 6, 2007 The disturbing thing is that I'm not joking. I've got to work with her tomorrow... Tell her you want to show her how we make babies... and that yes, men's thingies *are* usually shaped like that. Athough she is naive with regard to what a fallopian tube is, she knows all about what her other bits do. On another occassion, when her then work mate was sating that she would never do anal because it would hurt, she piped up to say "Its not all that bad actually". She has been taken advantage of several times by men old enough to be her father. She is a country lass you see. If you have a car, you are a millionaire to her. It's a shame really. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Anubis the Jackal 77 Posted July 6, 2007 Excellent, I'll be driving up next Thursday then. She has been taken advantage of several times by men old enough to be her father. She is a country lass you see. If you have a car, you are a millionaire to her. It's a shame really. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Josco 49 Posted July 6, 2007 Could I have a lift please? Excellent, I'll be driving up next Thursday then. She has been taken advantage of several times by men old enough to be her father. She is a country lass you see. If you have a car, you are a millionaire to her. It's a shame really. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Windsor 2,233 Posted July 6, 2007 If any ladies are interested, she rather randomly exclaimed she was bi-sexual today. I'm pretty sure she must have to odd glass of wine before coming to work.... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lard Bazaar 3,799 Posted July 7, 2007 The disturbing thing is that I'm not joking. I've got to work with her tomorrow... Tell her you want to show her how we make babies... and that yes, men's thingies *are* usually shaped like that. Athough she is naive with regard to what a fallopian tube is, she knows all about what her other bits do. On another occassion, when her then work mate was sating that she would never do anal because it would hurt, she piped up to say "Its not all that bad actually". She has been taken advantage of several times by men old enough to be her father. She is a country lass you see. If you have a car, you are a millionaire to her. It's a shame really. Ah, I see my mother has got a job at your place then. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Banshees Scream 110 Posted July 7, 2007 Respect your elders or lie and say they are dead. I'm sure your mother loves you and I'm sure she would not love this. Ah, I see my mother has got a job at your place then. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lard Bazaar 3,799 Posted July 7, 2007 Respect your elders or lie and say they are dead. I'm sure your mother loves you and I'm sure she would not love this. Ah, I see my mother has got a job at your place then. OK, she's dead. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Windsor 2,233 Posted July 7, 2007 Respect your elders or lie and say they are dead. I'm sure your mother loves you and I'm sure she would not love this. Ah, I see my mother has got a job at your place then. OK, she's dead. Deepest sympathies... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
honez 79 Posted July 8, 2007 On another occassion, when her then work mate was sating that she would never do anal because it would hurt, she piped up to say "Its not all that bad actually". Ah, I see my mother has got a job at your place then. Maybe Josco should get Anubis to drop him off at your place on the way? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Banshees Scream 110 Posted July 8, 2007 With talk like this lists will be running long. I don't know about me, but nobody said Anubis owned a limousine. Maybe Josco should get Anubis to drop him off at your place on the way? On another occassion, when her then work mate was sating that she would never do anal because it would hurt, she piped up to say "Its not all that bad actually" Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Phantom 2,533 Posted July 10, 2007 Ruby Wax reportedly told her interior designer to decorate one of the rooms to match her hair, so he gave her yellow walls and a brown carpet Share this post Link to post Share on other sites