maryportfuncity 10,684 Posted November 9, 2015 It's fast, it's furious it's f***in' good fun. Teams of 20 topplers posted on this thread or PM'd to MPFC will be collected into a masterlist to provide a carnival of carnage, the counting of which goes live in the first second of 2016. Points aplenty pour into the scoreboard until someone snags the stupendous total of 2016, at which point the fastest deadpool in common useage slams on the brakes and the lucky winner is duly given metaphorical back-slaps and allowed to claim a prize worth about a tenner (though tradition thus far dictates this turns into a charitable donation). Closing date for entries is midnight on 30 December 2015. Gazza: Toppler tease or scorer with ease in 2016? Deathrace teams: Bibliogriphon – bg Book - bk Captain Chorizo - cc Caskets Understand No Titles II - cu The Dead Cow – dc Deadsox - ds Death Impends – di Deathisallaround - da Devon Death Trip - dd G C Reptile – gr Gooseberry Crumble – gc JiroemonKimura – jk Lard Bazaar – lb Maryportfuncity – mp Morbidkid – mb MSC – ms Not Sir Peter Maxwell Davies – np Pistol Knight – pk Rad Guy – rg Rotten Ali - ra Sean of the Dead – sd Sir Creep – sc Switch - sw The Unknown Man – um Tick Tock – tt Toast - to Uschi - us YoungWillz – yw Youwantricewiththat - yr And let's have a look at the old scoreboard: Devon Death Trip - 2080 Sir Creep - 1776 Switch - 1755 Death Impends - 1751 MSC - 1684 Jiroemonkimura - 1402 Deadsox - 1396 Tick Tock - 1044 Toast - 1020 Dead Cow - 1015 GC Reptile - 707 pts Deathisall... - 692 MaryportFC - 673 Rad Guy - 673 Youwantrice... - 362 Book - 352 Captain Chorizo - 352 C.U.N.T. - 352 Rotten Ali - 352 Sean of the Dead - 352 Unknown Man - 352 Uschi - 352 YoungWillz - 348 Pistol Knight - 348 Bibliogyphon - 347 Lardy - 332 Hall of Fame: Raskolnikov - 2009 Champion: No champion 2010 DDT - 2011 Champion Spade Cooley - 2012 Champion DDT - 2013 Champion Death Impends - 2014 Champion MSC - 2015 Champion 3 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
maryportfuncity 10,684 Posted November 9, 2015 And you will know us by the trail of dead: Jimmy Carter; won one big race in 1976, where will he finish up in the list of the lost? 1st Jan: A B Bardhan - gr - 365 pts 2nd Jan: Michel Delpech – di - 364 4th Jan: Robert Stigwood – yr - 362 4th Jan: Aden Hailu - dd - 362 6th Jan: Hassan Asif – sc* 360 6th Jan: Alfredo "Chocolate" Armenteros – di, dd* - 360 6th Jan: Pat Harrington jr. – di, ds, jk, sc - 360 9th Jan: Jānis Vaišļa – sw - 357 12th Jan: Andrew Smith – ms, sc, sw - 354 14th Jan: Rene Angelil – bk, cc, cu, da, dc, dd, ds*, jk, mp, ms, ra, rg, sd, sw*, to, tt*, um, us - 352 18th Jan: Glen Frey – yw - 348 18th Jan: Yasutaro Koide – jk, pk - 348 19th Jan: Sheila Sim – bg, to - 347 22nd Jan: Shankar Ghosh – dc - 344 24th Jan: John Jay Hooker – gr, jk, sc - 342 24th Jan: G. Monty Brinson – di - 342 26th Jan: Abe Vigoda – da, sw, tt - 340 Feb 3rd: Mark Farren – ds, lb, ms - 332 Feb 10th: Phil Gartside – dd, di, ms 325 Feb 14th: Eric Lubbock – dc, dd, mp, ms, rg, to - 321 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
maryportfuncity 10,684 Posted November 9, 2015 This post reserved for the masterlist; presided over - as in the two previous years - by the cheerful and healthy looking form of toppler-tease Valerie Harper. Tony Adamowicz – di*, gr, sc Kareem Abdul Jabber – yr Caroline Aherne – lb, yr* Lassie Lou Ahern – us Ilse Aichinger - gr Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi – dc, dd Jean Alexander – bg, cu Muhammad Ali – bk, lb, tt, um, yw Mother Angelica - ds Rene Angelil – bk, cc, cu, da, dc, dd, ds*, jk, mp, ms, ra, rg, sd, sw*, to, tt*, um, us Fiona Apple – np Alfredo "Chocolate" Armenteros – di, dd* Sir Edward Ashmore – lb Hassan Asif – sc* Ed Asner – pk Diana Athill – lb, us John "Totalbiscuit" Bain – cc, ds Gordon Banks – np A B Bardhan - gr Alice Barker - gr Paul Barrerre – cc Geoffrey Bayldon – gr, to Daisy Berkowitz – dc, rg, tt, us Ivy Bethune – gc Lilliane Bettancourt – bg Rodney Bewes – to J. Todd Billings - ds Honour Blackman – pk Lionel Blair – gc Anthony Booth – cu*, gc, lb, mb, np, rg, sd, sw Jim Bowen – da Boy George - np Bhumibol Adulyadej – ds, gc, jk, mb, rg, sd, sw, to, tt, um Ian Brady – mb, yw Asa Briggs – np G. Monty Brinson – di Tom Brokaw - yw Josh Brookes – lb* Bonnie Brown – di, dd, ms, um June Brown – cu Daniel Buechlein - gr George HW Bush – da, lb, rg, tt Prince Buster – to Glen Campbell – jk, mp, um, us, yw Brian Cant – bg Pierre Cardin – bk, cu Lord Carrington – da, gc Jimmy Carter – mb*, pk, ra, sc, to, tt, yw David Cassidy – lb Fidel Castro – bk, tt, um, us Věra Čáslavská - dd Marge Champion – yw Carol Channing – mb, ra Jacques Chirac – gc Tommy Chong – um, yr Errol Christie - dd Bill Cosby – yr Paul Cox – cc Martin Crowe – bg, bk, cc, cu, dc, dd, di, jk, mb, mp, ms, ra, rg, sc, sd, sw, to, tt, um, us*,yw Johan Cruyff – yw Tam Dalyell – pk Howard Davies Jr. – cc, dc, ds, ms, rg, sc – DNS DUE TO DEATH Liz Dawn – bg, mb, to Doris Day – us F W de Clerk – gc Olivia DeHavilland – bk, da, pk, np, tt, us Michel Delpech – di Lana del Ray – np Eileen Derbyshire – gc Clive Derby-Lewis – yw Colin Dexter - to Christie Dignam – um Jenny Diski – cu, dc, dd, ds, mp, ms, ra, rg, sw, um Parveen Sultana Diti – di Pete Doherty – yr Mamie van Doren – us Robert F. Dorr – cc Kirk Douglas – bg, bk, da, dc, ds, pk, ra, sd, tt, yr Russell Dunkeld - gr Clarissa Eden – cu, gc, mp Jannes Eiselen – cc, ds Bob Ellis - sc Peter Esterhazy – dd, ds, mp, ms Keith Farnham – ds, ms Mark Farren – ds, lb, ms Joey Feek – bk*, cc*, cu, da, dc*, dd, di, ds, jk*, mp*, ms*, pk*, ra, rg*, sc, sd*, sw, to*, tt, um*, us Thomas Fekete - dd Rob Ford – bk, dc, dd, mp, ms, ra, rg, us, yw Michael Forgey - gr Bruce Forsythe – da, lb Michael J Fox – yr Glen Frey – yw Robert Fyfe – pk Zsa Zsa Gabor – bg, bk, cu, da*, ds, jk, mb, np, pk, ra, rg, sd, sw, tt, um, us, yr Phil Gartside – dd, di, ms Jill Gascoigne - lb Paul Gascoigne – lb, mp, np, sw George Gaynes – lb, mb Shankar Ghosh – dc Barry Gibb – yr Lewis Gilbert – bg Gaston Glock – lb Michial Gorbachev – cu Billy Graham – bk, cu, gc, pk, ra*, rg, sd, sw, to, tt, um, yr Kate Granger – da, mp, rg Oscar Groenig – mb Gary Haggarty – dd Aden Hailu - dd Thor Hansen – cc, jk Gerald Harper – to Valerie Harper – da, mb, pk, yr, tt, um, yw Pat Harrington jr. – di, ds, jk, sc Joao Havalange – bg, bk, cu, ds, jk, mb, ra, rg, sd, sw, tt Stephen Hawking – ra, sw, tt Ken Hechler – di, sc, sd Hugh Hefner – cu, da Henrik Prince Consort of Denmark – gc Mary Higgins-Clark – gc Claire Hollingsworth – sd, tt John Jay Hooker – gr, jk, sc William H. Hudnut III – di Marsha Hunt – us John Hurt – bg Jeremy Hutchinson – bg*, sd Joe Jackson (brutal dad) – np Joe Jackson (singer) – np Katherine Jackson – np Clive James – cu, da, dc, lb, mb, ra, tt, um, yw* Greville Janner – yw – DNS DUE TO DEATH Dambuster Johnny Johnson - pk Sharon Lafaye Jones - mp Susannah M. Jones – cc, cu, di, ds, jk, mp, pk, ra, sc, to Tanya Jones – lb Piet de Jong – us Anker Jorgensen - gr Michael Karoc - gr Gerald Kaufman – pk, yr Helen Kelly - gr George Kennedy – gc Ken Kercheval - gc Val Kilmer – cu, ra, yr Rowena Kinkaid - ms Helmut Kohl – bk, gr, jk, mb, ra, rg, sd Yasutaro Koide – jk, pk Bert Kwouk – sd Patricia Laffan – us Jake Lamotta – sd Bruce Langhorne – di Steve la Tourette – ms George Lazonby – np Stan Lee – da Lemmy – mp – DNS DUE TO DEATH Phil Lesh – yw Jerry Lewis – yr Jerry Lee Lewis – dc, yw Thomas Libous – jk Little Richard - dc Jeanne Little – mp, sd Norman Lloyd – yw Loongkoonan – cc Courtney Love - np Eric Lubbock – dc, dd, mp, ms, rg, to Mary Vaughan – dd Vera Lynn – bk, cu, da, pk, sd Dorothy Malone – gc Alfred "Al" Mann – gr John Manners – pk Diego Maradonna - np Howard Marks – dc, ds, jk, lb, mb, mp, ms, np, rg, sw, um, yr Bunny Matthews – cc Sir Peter Maxwell Davies - np Rev Sandy McDonald – dd, ds, ms Sheila Mercier - lb Bobbie Heine Miller – bk, cc Cliff Mitchelmore – sd, to Walter Mondale – bg Emma Morano – cc, dc, di, mp, sc Dorothy Morrison – us Hosni Mubarak – mb, ra Robert Mugabe – da, mb Ronald Mulkearns - dd Blackjack Mulligan – sc Yasihiro Nakamatsue – cc, di, sc, um Yasuhiro Nakasone - bg, um Liam Neeson – mb Gino Odjick – sw Tariq ba Odah – gr Richard Overton – gr, sc Rose Pak - gr Arnold Palmer – np I.M. Pei – sw Pele – yw .Javier Perez de Cuellar – um Prince Philip (Duke of Edinburgh) – bk, da, pk, us, yw Leslie Philips – bg, to, yr, yw Lester Piggott – bg Louise Plowright – dd Joseph Ratzinger – cu, da Chris Rea – yr Nancy Reagan – np*, ra, yr Sumner Redstone - dc Burt Reynolds – bk, mb, um John Rigas – di, jk Mercy Rimmell – to Terri Roberts – mp Bishop Geoffrey Robinson – cc, jk, ms David Rockerfeller – bk Sharon Percy Rockerfeller - sc Randy Romero – cc, dc, ds Linda Ronstadt – yr Peter Sallis – bg, dc, pk Helmut Schmidt – ct - DNS DUE TO DEATH Vojislav Seselj - rg Jakucho Setouchi – cc Louise Sherry – mp Sheila Sim – bg, to Barbara Sinatra – gc Douglas Slocombe – jk, sd Andrew Smith – ms, sc, sw Huston Smith – dc, di, gr*, jk, sc, sd Liz Smith – to Lord Snowdon – gc June Spencer – bg Pavel Srnicek – sw – DNS DUE TO DEATH Jackie Stallone - bk Ian St John - rg Lynn Stewart – mb Robert Stigwood – yr Nobby Stiles – ds, mp, sc, to Peter Sutcliffe – bg Joleen Swan – cc “The Amazing” Jonathan Szeles - sc Cardinal Julio Terrazas – cc – DNS DUE TO DEATH Lupita Tovar – bk, jk, sc, tt Kris Travis – cc, rg, sw John Turner – gc Desmond Tutu – ra, us Mary Tyler Moore – bg,lb, um Gudrun Ure - np Sir Brian Urquart – lb Jānis Vaišļa – sw Abe Vigoda – da, sw, tt Joost van der Westhuizen – mp, ms, sw Dick Van Dyke - da Claus von Bulow – yw Lorraine Warren – us James Watson – gc Betty White – pk, sw Mary Wilson – cu, ms Barbara Windsor – gc Dale Winton – gc* Herman Wouk – dc Suzanne Wright – di, gr Zhou Youguang – di, rg Alan Young – ds Jiang Zemin - ra 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
maryportfuncity 10,684 Posted November 9, 2015 Deathrace 2016 - Those Rules in Full: 1 - The object of the Deathrace is to be the first contestant to reach 2016 points. 2 - To enter the Deathrace a contestant must have:i: a team of twenty topplers ("topplers" must be at least 18 years old on 1 Jan 2016; but are otherwise unrestricted). ii: Deathlist membership (i.e. be at least a pointless ranter and at most a dedicated Cumbrian corpse hound, or summat) 3 - Entries close promptly at midnight on 30 December and entry can be made either by sending a team of twenty to MPFC via PM hereabouts and/or by posting a team of twenty on the Deathrace 2016 thread. 4 - Players score points every time a team member dies and accrues an obit (see point 9 below) and the score for each death is calculated as one point for each complete calendar day remaining in 2016 after the death of the team member; so a death on 1 January earns 365 pts, a death on 2 January earns 364 pts etc. 5 - Each team must nominate one member as a joker and the joker scores double points on death. 6 - The winner is the first player to reach or exceed 2016 pts. 7 - In the event that a death or deaths on a specific day push more than one player beyond a winning score the player with the highest overall score will be deemed to be the winner. 8 - In the event that two or more players tie for victory a Deathrace play off will ensue with all potential winners continuing to compete until such time as one potential winner scores more points than any other potential winner (such points continuing to be accrued as per the scoring system described in point 4 above). 9 - An "obit" in the context of the Deathrace is any news report in English from a reliable source. Such sources include - but are not limited to - UK national press, UK national broadcast organisations, foreign press and broadcast organisations with an English language thread to their communication, trade press in English, local news organisations reporting in English and coverage in specialist online sites, such as those monitoring the well-being of super-centenarians. Where dispute arises over the qualifying nature of a news source for obit purposes MPFC's decision is final. But he wants fast and furious competition and is generally very amenable to low hanging dead pool fruit of all varieties. 10 - To qualify for entry purposes team members must be alive at 00-01 hrs on 1 January 2016 or qualify for the Raymond Hewlitt Memorial Exemption (RHME) (see point 11). 11 - In honour of everybody's favourite Maddie-implicated paedo scum a candidate widely believed to be alive on 1 January and subsequently proven to have died previously will be awarded 366 points in the event that a Deathrace qualifying obit subsequently appears for said candidate. In the event that a Deathrace qualifying obit for the candidate is subsequently proven to have existed prior to commencement of the Deathrace all points will be voided. RHME points are only available during competition and in the event that a winner has been declared before discovery of a qualifyiing RHME candidate no revision of the final result will occur. Similarly, if some lucky candidate is awarded RHME points and these points are still in play at the time a winner is declared the points will not subsequently be voided and may - therefore - count towards a championship. All disputes relating to RHME will be resolved by the astute judgement of MPFC and there is no appeals procedure (though all sides of opionion are warmly invited to liven up the Deathrace thread by venting their fury). 11a - Similarly to pt 11 above, if an obited death occurs during play of the Deathrace and is missed despite MPFC's best efforts to stay in touch and/or the spirited efforts of Deathrace participants and said death is missed in totting up points, after which a winner is declared, then this death will not count for competition purposes. The same is true in the case of a known death gathering a late obit and therefore allowing some other competitor to be declared a winner. All disputes relating to rule 11a will be resolved by the astute judgement of MPFC and there is no appeals procedure (though all sides of opionion are warmly invited to liven up the Deathrace thread by venting their fury). 12 - In the event that Deathlist editing options or other online trickery is discovered to have been employed in the editing of teams, those duly fingered for such cheating will be removed from the Deathrace and banned for life from subsequent entry into Deathraces. 13 - The prize will be awarded as follows:i: Should the winner agree to attend a DLCon with MPFC a double measure of alcholic drinks (pints, wine or spirits) will be supplied by MPFC along with much hearty congratulations and back-slapping. ii: A carefully chosen and appropriate prize will be posted to the winner (such as the DVD copy of the original Deathrace movie supplied to the 2009 champion). iii: MPFC will make a charitable donation to a cause of the winner's choice (as has been the case with four of the five existing winnings of the Deathrace). This course of action is highly encouraged and is known to show dead poolers as something other than the sicko scum many ranters believe us to be. AND FINALLY...A masterlist of entries will be posted after the closing date. MPFC will undertake to update the scoreboard at least once every seven days. On completion of Deathrace activities the thread will get lively for a short while as losing contestants and spectactors offer well-deserved congratulations to the skilful and highly talented new champion, after which time it is expected that the cooling corpse of the thread will be allowed to gently sink into oblivion. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
msc 18,536 Posted November 9, 2015 You're eager! I think this could be a far tougher year to win though. With Death Impends rapid improvement year on year, DDT and Spade being DDT and Spade (if they play), and perhaps Sir Creep if you can entice him to play (his Shadow list this year had 7 hits by February, with smart picking he'd have crushed the field here)... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
The Mad Hatter 1,093 Posted November 9, 2015 You're eager! I think this could be a far tougher year to win though. With Death Impends rapid improvement year on year, DDT and Spade being DDT and Spade (if they play), and perhaps Sir Creep if you can entice him to play (his Shadow list this year had 7 hits by February, with smart picking he'd have crushed the field here)... you forgot unknown man he is dominating Shaun's deathpool. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bibliogryphon 9,647 Posted November 9, 2015 Might be tempted to get in first again. Maybe tomorrow. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bibliogryphon 9,647 Posted November 9, 2015 Oh I am busy tomorrow. There is no time like the present. Jean Alexander Lilliane Bettancourt Brian Cant Martin Crowe Liz Dawn Kirk Douglas Zsa Zsa Gabor Lewis Gilbert Joao Havalange Jeremy Hutchinson (Joker) Walter Mondale Yasuhiro Nakasone Leslie Philips Lester Piggott John Hurt Peter Sallis Sheila Sim June Spencer Peter Sutcliffe Mary Tyler Moore I got into four figures this year. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
YoungWillz 21,212 Posted November 9, 2015 If we pick someone now and they die before commencement (non-RHME), can we pick an appropriate substitute? Sorry if this is an obvious question, I wasn't here last year. I'm keen to be involved, although anyone I pick is likely to survive until 2017 anyway on previous form! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
maryportfuncity 10,684 Posted November 9, 2015 If we pick someone now and they die before commencement (non-RHME), can we pick an appropriate substitute? Sorry if this is an obvious question, I wasn't here last year. I'm keen to be involved, although anyone I pick is likely to survive until 2017 anyway on previous form! Yeah, some subs would be handy when submitting a team early. And THANKS to BG for submitting a team in alphabetical order, that's started the masterlist off nicely. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
YoungWillz 21,212 Posted November 9, 2015 Thanks, MPFC, I'll PM you my list shortly, I'll give you say 3 substitutes (gets coffee and thinks)! Edit: The Usain Bolts of YoungWillz team now sent to you. No doubt half will die now before the start, but I'll keep an eye on it. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Sir Creep 7,071 Posted November 9, 2015 What excuses may I use to avoid lifelong banishment under Rule 12 above? "I didn't know" "Accidentally clicked on delete, forgot who I deleted so put who I thought it was" "Drunk" "Testing the rule, seeing if you meant it" Etc SC 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
The Mad Hatter 1,093 Posted November 9, 2015 I am currently debating with myself to whether or not I should post my team now. I am saying this because I am worried alot of my entities would pass away. I do already have four pints on my Shaun's deathlist team and its only been 2 mounts Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
YoungWillz 21,212 Posted November 9, 2015 ^^ Loving the predictive text here. I've always felt pints lead to mounts too. 3 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Deathray 2,942 Posted November 9, 2015 ^^ Loving the predictive text here. I've always felt pints lead to mounts too. You've obviously had more success than me they mormally lead to counts (1 tug 2 tug 3 tug) 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
maryportfuncity 10,684 Posted November 9, 2015 I am currently debating with myself to whether or not I should post my team now. I am saying this because I am worried alot of my entities would pass away. I do already have four pints on my Shaun's deathlist team and its only been 2 mounts I've had a couple already, with a large subs bench. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
maryportfuncity 10,684 Posted November 9, 2015 Thanks, MPFC, I'll PM you my list shortly, I'll give you say 3 substitutes (gets coffee and thinks)! Edit: The Usain Bolts of YoungWillz team now sent to you. No doubt half will die now before the start, but I'll keep an eye on it. They're on the masterlist, thanks for lining them up alphabetically. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Death Impends 8,043 Posted November 9, 2015 I'll be entering Dec 30 as usual. May make my team more DDP-pick heavy this time, we'll see... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RadGuy 1,619 Posted November 9, 2015 I'll enter in about a month. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
msc 18,536 Posted November 9, 2015 I'll be entering Dec 30 as usual. May make my team more DDP-pick heavy this time, we'll see... I'll enter around that time too, probably with a DDP crossover. In the past, MPFC has been good at being sworn to secrecy on DDP picks. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
gcreptile 11,074 Posted November 9, 2015 I will handicap myself again and not choose the same person for two deadpools (excepting the Rotten Dead Pool). Let's see how it goes... I feel there is an unusual eagerness on this forum this year to get the next year going. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
msc 18,536 Posted November 9, 2015 I will handicap myself again and not choose the same person for two deadpools (excepting the Rotten Dead Pool). Let's see how it goes... I feel there is an unusual eagerness on this forum this year to get the next year going. Reminds me of the poem I often feel is the Deathlist forum's unofficial anthem. For the Anniversary of My Death By W. S. Merwin Every year without knowing it I have passed the day When the last fires will wave to me And the silence will set out Tireless traveler Like the beam of a lightless star. Deeeeep. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
The Mad Hatter 1,093 Posted November 9, 2015 Well here goes 1.Valerie Harper 2.Jimmy Carter (joker) 3.Martin crowe 4. The king of Thailand 5. Burt Reynolds 6. Liz dawn 7. Lynne Stewart 8. Liam neeson 9. Zsa zsa Gabor 10. Anthony booth 11. Oskar groning 12. Carol canning 13. Ian Brady 14. Helmut Kohl 15. Joan havelange 16. Geogre gaynes 17. Howard Marks 18. Hosni Mubarak 19. Clive James 20. Robert Mugabe Subs 21. Clifton James 22. Abe vogoda 23. Lord carrinton 24. Vera Lynn 25. Chris rae Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
maryportfuncity 10,684 Posted November 10, 2015 Thanks to those of you who picked Schmidt for also picking subs; he's the first 'DNS due to death' on the masterlist Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Paul Bearer 6,130 Posted November 10, 2015 Thanks to those of you who picked Schmidt for also picking subs; he's the first 'DNS due to death' on the masterlist DNS? Did Not Survive? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
