Lord Fellatio Nelson 6,218 Posted November 30, 2012 I've just got tickets for Robbie Williams next year. And I don't give a shit that none of you give a shit. I've just jizzed in my pants. So there. And the best thing is, I've faked a doctor's appointment for tomorrow morning, as they go on sale then and I was going to stay at home on the net for the morning refreshing the Ticketmaster page, but I got home tonight to an email saying I was entitled to pre-sale tickets - two minutes later and I'M ON MY WAY TO WEMBLEY! So I have Robbie tickets AND a fucking lie in tomorrow! BEAT THAT, FUCKERS! Well Ive got a WHOLE day off today WITHOUT having to lie through my fucking teeth!!!!!!! Im also pencilled in for a long weekend to HHHHHHHHHamsterdam next March..... Finally, today, i will mostly be having the angle grinder out chopping grot outta da floors of me ole classic car and i shall be doing it finking that im grinding through the neck of my manager. BEAT THAT,FUCKERS! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
our Sydney 11 Posted November 30, 2012 OK Mr Nelson I shall have a go got to the station this morning, trains not running so went back home to work from home. . . in the time I would have spent commuting I have stripped the oil system off my dragster engine, removed the electrics and removed the front engine mounts in preperation for pulling the engine tommorow lunchtime. you may like cutting out rust, I like working on the oily bits! Best regards Syd 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lord Fellatio Nelson 6,218 Posted November 30, 2012 OK Mr Nelson I shall have a go got to the station this morning, trains not running so went back home to work from home. . . in the time I would have spent commuting I have stripped the oil system off my dragster engine, removed the electrics and removed the front engine mounts in preperation for pulling the engine tommorow lunchtime. you may like cutting out rust, I like working on the oily bits! Best regards Syd Fook, fair play to you!!! Ive now found far more rot than i had hoped so Im having a cup of tea and contemplating................ Mebbee I should pop into room 101. PS: Still better than being at work. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lard Bazaar 3,799 Posted November 30, 2012 OK Mr Nelson I shall have a go got to the station this morning, trains not running so went back home to work from home. . . in the time I would have spent commuting I have stripped the oil system off my dragster engine, removed the electrics and removed the front engine mounts in preperation for pulling the engine tommorow lunchtime. you may like cutting out rust, I like working on the oily bits! Best regards Syd Fook, fair play to you!!! Ive now found far more rot than i had hoped so Im having a cup of tea and contemplating................ Mebbee I should pop into room 101. PS: Still better than being at work. Well because I'm so fucking awesome and good at my job I actually went in this morning and didn't have a lie in. Absolutely NOTHING to do with the fact that I'm applying for two new jobs and am sucking up as much as possible! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Rotten Ali 600 Posted December 1, 2012 OK Mr Nelson I shall have a go got to the station this morning, trains not running so went back home to work from home. . . in the time I would have spent commuting I have stripped the oil system off my dragster engine, removed the electrics and removed the front engine mounts in preperation for pulling the engine tommorow lunchtime. you may like cutting out rust, I like working on the oily bits! Best regards Syd Fook, fair play to you!!! Ive now found far more rot than i had hoped so Im having a cup of tea and contemplating................ Mebbee I should pop into room 101. PS: Still better than being at work. Well because I'm so fucking awesome and good at my job I actually went in this morning and didn't have a lie in. Absolutely NOTHING to do with the fact that I'm applying for two new jobs and am sucking up as much as possible! That's very noble of you. Very forward thinking. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
our Sydney 11 Posted December 3, 2012 I would like to nominate my engine. . . . took it apart and it is just the top end that needs a rebuild, bottom end is fine so this is not going to cost me lots of money to fix and I may actually run at the start of the season! Best regards Syd Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Toast 16,132 Posted December 6, 2012 I've just got tickets for Robbie Williams next year. And I don't give a shit that none of you give a shit. I've just jizzed in my pants. So there. And the best thing is, I've faked a doctor's appointment for tomorrow morning, as they go on sale then and I was going to stay at home on the net for the morning refreshing the Ticketmaster page, but I got home tonight to an email saying I was entitled to pre-sale tickets - two minutes later and I'M ON MY WAY TO WEMBLEY! So I have Robbie tickets AND a fucking lie in tomorrow! BEAT THAT, FUCKERS! Good for you, Lardy. I've got similar plans pencilled in next week re Bruce Springsteen. Booked for Bruce and have just found I've won £500 on the premium bonds, woo hoo! Now shall I book for Coventry as well or wait and see if they drop another Wembley date in? Tough decisions Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
our Sydney 11 Posted December 6, 2012 I've just got tickets for Robbie Williams next year. And I don't give a shit that none of you give a shit. I've just jizzed in my pants. So there. And the best thing is, I've faked a doctor's appointment for tomorrow morning, as they go on sale then and I was going to stay at home on the net for the morning refreshing the Ticketmaster page, but I got home tonight to an email saying I was entitled to pre-sale tickets - two minutes later and I'M ON MY WAY TO WEMBLEY! So I have Robbie tickets AND a fucking lie in tomorrow! BEAT THAT, FUCKERS! Good for you, Lardy. I've got similar plans pencilled in next week re Bruce Springsteen. Booked for Bruce and have just found I've won £500 on the premium bonds, woo hoo! Now shall I book for Coventry as well or wait and see if they drop another Wembley date in? Tough decisions If you really would like an opinion Coventry, Wembly is so anty-septic a venue. Best regards Syd Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Toast 16,132 Posted December 6, 2012 I've just got tickets for Robbie Williams next year. And I don't give a shit that none of you give a shit. I've just jizzed in my pants. So there. And the best thing is, I've faked a doctor's appointment for tomorrow morning, as they go on sale then and I was going to stay at home on the net for the morning refreshing the Ticketmaster page, but I got home tonight to an email saying I was entitled to pre-sale tickets - two minutes later and I'M ON MY WAY TO WEMBLEY! So I have Robbie tickets AND a fucking lie in tomorrow! BEAT THAT, FUCKERS! Good for you, Lardy. I've got similar plans pencilled in next week re Bruce Springsteen. Booked for Bruce and have just found I've won £500 on the premium bonds, woo hoo! Now shall I book for Coventry as well or wait and see if they drop another Wembley date in? Tough decisions If you really would like an opinion Coventry, Wembly is so anty-septic a venue. Best regards Syd Coventry would be a change but the attraction of a Wembley Night 2 is that Bruce usually pulls out an almost completely different setlist on second nights. Although the Coventry setlist will not be a repeat of Wembley, you never get two shows the same with Bruce. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lard Bazaar 3,799 Posted December 6, 2012 Nice one on the premium bonds. I'm not a Springsteen fan at all, but I do like Wembley. Saw the Foo Fighters there in 2008 and it was FUCKING LOUD. And Take That (shut up) last year was brilliant, although the pitch was urine-saturated by the end - middle aged women jumping up and down screaming is not a good combo if you want to keep your underpants dry. As at all venues though, food is overpriced crap. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Madame Defarge 21 Posted December 6, 2012 Nice one on the premium bonds. I'm not a Springsteen fan at all, but I do like Wembley. Saw the Foo Fighters there in 2008 and it was FUCKING LOUD. And Take That (shut up) last year was brilliant, although the pitch was urine-saturated by the end - middle aged women jumping up and down screaming is not a good combo if you want to keep your underpants dry. As at all venues though, food is overpriced crap. Awwww! You don't like 'Glory Days', Lardy? That's such a great song. At least you won't have to worry about any urine-soaked hysteria unless the Boss plays 'Born in the USA'( the Obama campaign's theme song ) and Karl Rove is in attendance. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lord Fellatio Nelson 6,218 Posted December 9, 2012 Just spent an hour and a bit in Casualty having some metal removed from my eye. I have to return on Tuesday for a check up/further fucking about with said eye. My eye is blurred. Blurred vision means that, technically, I cannot drive which means I cannot work which means, oh, about a week off work. Happy days!!!! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lard Bazaar 3,799 Posted December 9, 2012 Just spent an hour and a bit in Casualty having some metal removed from my eye. I have to return on Tuesday for a check up/further fucking about with said eye. My eye is blurred. Blurred vision means that, technically, I cannot drive which means I cannot work which means, oh, about a week off work. Happy days!!!! Jammy cunt. How did you manage that, surely you weren't doing manly activities on a Sunday? My betrothed is a metalworker and so I am more than familiar with your predicament, Steel-Eye Spam. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lord Fellatio Nelson 6,218 Posted December 9, 2012 The rest is history or summat. Just spent an hour and a bit in Casualty having some metal removed from my eye. I have to return on Tuesday for a check up/further fucking about with said eye. My eye is blurred. Blurred vision means that, technically, I cannot drive which means I cannot work which means, oh, about a week off work. Happy days!!!! Jammy cunt. How did you manage that, surely you weren't doing manly activities on a Sunday? My betrothed is a metalworker and so I am more than familiar with your predicament, Steel-Eye Spam. Nope, did it Thursday but thought I had just scratched it. nobody, me included, could see fook all in it. I went down to Es...SEX on Saturday to see my parents. My sister turns up ( she works in Opthalmology at Sarfend 'ospital) who sees it straight away and tells me to get up to Casualty ASAP. So I went this morning..... My eye is now worse, as im putting this gel cream in, than it was when I walked out of Casualty. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lard Bazaar 3,799 Posted December 9, 2012 The rest is history or summat. Just spent an hour and a bit in Casualty having some metal removed from my eye. I have to return on Tuesday for a check up/further fucking about with said eye. My eye is blurred. Blurred vision means that, technically, I cannot drive which means I cannot work which means, oh, about a week off work. Happy days!!!! Jammy cunt. How did you manage that, surely you weren't doing manly activities on a Sunday? My betrothed is a metalworker and so I am more than familiar with your predicament, Steel-Eye Spam. Nope, did it Thursday but thought I had just scratched it. nobody, me included, could see fook all in it. I went down to Es...SEX on Saturday to see my parents. My sister turns up ( she works in Opthalmology at Sarfend 'ospital) who sees it straight away and tells me to get up to Casualty ASAP. So I went this morning..... My eye is now worse, as im putting this gel cream in, than it was when I walked out of Casualty. Pfffttt, cream in the eye, fnarr fnarr! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lord Fellatio Nelson 6,218 Posted December 9, 2012 The rest is history or summat. Just spent an hour and a bit in Casualty having some metal removed from my eye. I have to return on Tuesday for a check up/further fucking about with said eye. My eye is blurred. Blurred vision means that, technically, I cannot drive which means I cannot work which means, oh, about a week off work. Happy days!!!! Jammy cunt. How did you manage that, surely you weren't doing manly activities on a Sunday? My betrothed is a metalworker and so I am more than familiar with your predicament, Steel-Eye Spam. Nope, did it Thursday but thought I had just scratched it. nobody, me included, could see fook all in it. I went down to Es...SEX on Saturday to see my parents. My sister turns up ( she works in Opthalmology at Sarfend 'ospital) who sees it straight away and tells me to get up to Casualty ASAP. So I went this morning..... My eye is now worse, as im putting this gel cream in, than it was when I walked out of Casualty. Pfffttt, cream in the eye, fnarr fnarr! Aye, pure porn!!! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Rotten Ali 600 Posted December 10, 2012 Aye-eye... oh dear, sounds like you had your metal tested, but look on the bright side, that means you will finally creaming it in, listening to Blur and heavy metal music for a few weeks. In all seriousness LFN, I hope you make a full and speedy recovery. Edit: too many "and"s in the post... 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lord Fellatio Nelson 6,218 Posted December 11, 2012 Aye-eye... oh dear, sounds like you had your metal tested, but look on the bright side, that means you will finally creaming it in, listening to Blur and heavy metal music for a few weeks. In all seriousness LFN, I hope you make a full and speedy and recovery. Thank you RA. Im currently one eye down but shall resume normal service in due course. It naturally follows that I now have the rest of the week off. Every cloud, eh? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lard Bazaar 3,799 Posted December 11, 2012 As long as your japs eye is working, you don't need the other two. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lady Grendel 139 Posted December 14, 2012 Lothian and Borders Police It's Sunday morning I was having a bit of a lie in, yes I thought it was odd that when I went downstairs at 8 a.m.to the kitchen to get a glass of water that all the lights were on and the hall light at the outside door was also on but I checked the door, it was locked but I didn't think to check my keys were in their hiding place or to check my senile old dad was in his bed. Just after 9 a.m. I was awakened by loud male voices on the landing, I thought my ma had maybe called a doctor for my dad, he is quite frail and senile and refusing to eat, but no, I wandered out looking like a bad advert for Jedward to be met by an Amazonian police officer and his pal. They were just fantastic, my dad had found the hiding place for my keys and was wandering about a housing estate in Kelso looking for a Knightswood Hospital, Knightswood Hospital was a place dad was treated in the 1970's for severe asthma, it is in Glasgow and was demolished many years ago, A jogger found him and spoke to him, realised my dad was confused and took him home to his house where his wife gave Dad tea and biscuits while the jogger phoned the police, they arrived and brought my dad home to us.. The police were just great and I would like to add the unknown jogger and his wife to Room Lovely, it gives me a lot of confidence that people in our small community look out for each other. My neighbours are aware dad wanders and if they are around they shadow him as we have found out this week. Dementia is hard to deal with for anyone and it is a struggle every day for us, but the way the boys from Lothian and Borders Police dealt with my dad was just fantastic. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Magere Hein 1,400 Posted December 14, 2012 Lothian and Borders Police I told you they have their uses. :-) regards, Hein Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
time 8,596 Posted December 14, 2012 Lothian and Borders Police It's Sunday morning I was having a bit of a lie in, yes I thought it was odd that when I went downstairs at 8 a.m.to the kitchen to get a glass of water that all the lights were on and the hall light at the outside door was also on but I checked the door, it was locked but I didn't think to check my keys were in their hiding place or to check my senile old dad was in his bed. Just after 9 a.m. I was awakened by loud male voices on the landing, I thought my ma had maybe called a doctor for my dad, he is quite frail and senile and refusing to eat, but no, I wandered out looking like a bad advert for Jedward to be met by an Amazonian police officer and his pal. They were just fantastic, my dad had found the hiding place for my keys and was wandering about a housing estate in Kelso looking for a Knightswood Hospital, Knightswood Hospital was a place dad was treated in the 1970's for severe asthma, it is in Glasgow and was demolished many years ago, A jogger found him and spoke to him, realised my dad was confused and took him home to his house where his wife gave Dad tea and biscuits while the jogger phoned the police, they arrived and brought my dad home to us.. The police were just great and I would like to add the unknown jogger and his wife to Room Lovely, it gives me a lot of confidence that people in our small community look out for each other. My neighbours are aware dad wanders and if they are around they shadow him as we have found out this week. Dementia is hard to deal with for anyone and it is a struggle every day for us, but the way the boys from Lothian and Borders Police dealt with my dad was just fantastic. Nice to hear. Restores your faith in humanity somewhat. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lord Fellatio Nelson 6,218 Posted January 15, 2013 Robins. There was I, out in the snow and pissing cold, working in this box when a lickle Robin decided to join me. He ate half my crisps ( Smokey Bacon) had great fun eating the insects that were living in the frame of the box and he sat on my tools ( TOOLS) watching me. He was no more than an arms length for quite some time He was fabulous and made me think that, at that moment, God had been pretty good at encapsulating beauty. Awwwwwww!!! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lard Bazaar 3,799 Posted January 15, 2013 Robins. There was I, out in the snow and pissing cold, working in this box when a lickle Robin decided to join me. He ate half my crisps ( Smokey Bacon) had great fun eating the insects that were living in the frame of the box and he sat on my tools ( TOOLS) watching me. He was no more than an arms length for quite some time He was fabulous and made me think that, at that moment, God had been pretty good at encapsulating beauty. Awwwwwww!!! A bird sat on your tool, eh? 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lord Fellatio Nelson 6,218 Posted January 15, 2013 Robins. There was I, out in the snow and pissing cold, working in this box when a lickle Robin decided to join me. He ate half my crisps ( Smokey Bacon) had great fun eating the insects that were living in the frame of the box and he sat on my tools ( TOOLS) watching me. He was no more than an arms length for quite some time He was fabulous and made me think that, at that moment, God had been pretty good at encapsulating beauty. Awwwwwww!!! A bird sat on your tool, eh? I should be so lucky! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites