Andy Fordham Memorial Darts Thread

[Dr. Zorders 1,271]

Olly Croft looked like they had to pull him off the mortuary table in that BBC4 darts documentary over Xmas, can't see him going another 12 months.

 

Didn't see it but I'll take your word for it. I am, and will be, an unlucky boy.

[Spade_Cooley 9,515]

Three-time Lakeside third-rounder Steve Douglas, who had a heart attack in 2012 and was told by his doctor to avoid stressful situations as they'd probably kill him, has won a PDC tourcard. I'm sure the irregular low pay, lengthy travel schedule and chances to lose in straight sets in a Poole leisure centre to "Big" John Henderson will be a wonderful boost to his health.

[Lard Bazaar 3,799]

Andy Fordham's on telly at the moment, looks like he's putting on the weight again.

[John Kettley 49]

The Viking is back!

[Spade_Cooley 9,515]

And Larry Butler as well, stoked to see the pair of them get turned over by Rowby John Rodriguez

[maryportfuncity 10,639]

The Viking is back!

 

 

Respect, I'm assuming he's the only survivor of a stroke in the Grand Slam of Darts, that says a lot about how well he's recovered.

[Dr. Zorders 1,271]

Erm, no actually. Try Ted Hankey, who actually had a stroke on stage at the 2012 Grand Slam...!

[maryportfuncity 10,639]

Erm, no actually. Try Ted Hankey, who actually had a stroke on stage at the 2012 Grand Slam...!

 

Oh,right, bleedin' nuisance in that situation, eh?

 

 

Oh, my coat!

[Spade_Cooley 9,515]

And Jelle Klaasen enjoys a stroke, especially if there's [deleted on legal grounds].

[Spade_Cooley 9,515]

5-2 loss to fellow rolypoly Adrian "Snackpot" Lewis on his return to the big leagues. Impressive 116 checkout on the sixth leg though, even if his arms do resemble a roasting joint from a retarded cow.

[Lord Fellatio Nelson 6,218]

5-2 loss to fellow rolypoly Adrian "Snackpot" Lewis on his return to the big leagues. Impressive 116 checkout on the sixth leg though, even if his arms do resemble a roasting joint from a retarded cow.

I still cant believe that Lewis actually dated Helen Chamberlain when she was well fit.

Unfortunately, she currently looks like she is alive but embalmed in a desperate but futile attempt to look young and with it on the long past its sell by date Soccer AM

[Spade_Cooley 9,515]

Also in comeback kid news, 2002 BDO World Champion Tony David, who was at one point considered the #2 player in world darts behind The Groper, made it to the quarter finals of Oceanic Masters last week, having spent most of the past decade one particularly bad coughing fit from death thanks to his haemophilia and hepatitis.

[Spade_Cooley 9,515]

If this doesn't kill Olly Croft, nothing will

[YoungWillz 21,024]

Report of the death of "Let's Play Darts!" announcer Martin Fitzmaurice. https://twitter.com/darts_weekly/status/720666781979930624

 

Forced out due to a series of racist jokes at an event back in 2013...

 

[Spade_Cooley 9,515]

RIP fat racist.

[Phantom 2,532]

RIP fat racist.

 

aww be fair, he didn't know the cameras were still rolling. Otherwise he would have been racist in private.

[Dr. Zorders 1,271]

RIP fat racist.

 

aww be fair, he didn't know the cameras were still rolling. Otherwise he would have been racist in private.

 

If only he had tweeted "#KillAllWhiteMen" or called for all non-Halibuts to be killed you'd have been so proud of him....

But you know who the real dangerous people in the world are, fat men who make crude jokes to rooms full of fat white poor people... they're the real menace!

(Kill yourself)

[Scraggy Taters 290]

Erm, no actually. Try Ted Hankey, who actually had a stroke on stage at the 2012 Grand Slam...!

 

 

Not Mr Hankey, the Christmas Poo !?

 

I wouldn't recommend stroking him though.... unless you're wearing those naff pink Marigold gloves.

[CarolAnn 926]

Oh for shit's sake.

[Spade_Cooley 9,515]

Gerry Haywood, one of Yorkshire's better players of the early 80s, dead at 70. He made the quarter-finals of the 1983 British Professional, knocking out Keith Deller before coming up against Eric Bristow.

[Spade_Cooley 9,515]

Wolfie diagnosed with prostate cancer.

[themaninblack 2,112]

I've put a small each way bet at 33s for Dave Chisnall @ the PDC World Darts.

 

Went to the bookies, clean-shaven and slightly lost trying to find the Darts slips etc.

 

Assistant came out of his booth and asked me for my ID.

 

I am 41 years old...

[charon 4,943]

Provisional List of DListers to peg.

 

1TMIB, scouser, life expectancy of 38

2 Zorders, murdered, probably infanticide.

 

Sighs...

[msc 18,436]

Wolfie diagnosed with prostate cancer.

 

Wolfie started well in the BDO World Championship Quarterfinals, 3-0 up, but let his opponent back into the match and wound up losing 5-4. I wonder if he'll take the same long term approach to fighting cancer.

[maryportfuncity 10,639]

 

Wolfie diagnosed with prostate cancer.

 

Wolfie started well in the BDO World Championship Quarterfinals, 3-0 up, but let his opponent back into the match and wound up losing 5-4. I wonder if he'll take the same long term approach to fighting cancer.

 

 

 

Ironically the latest laser approach of targeting the cancer by attacking it with precisely aimed bursts does bear some resemblance to landing three spikes perfectly together in a 180 three dart score