dead Sir Patrick Moore

[Star Crossed 33]

Another month, another Sky At Night. A tour of our solar system tonight, presented by the astronomical phenomenon himself with help, as usual, from sundry boffins. Sir Patrick was on top form tonight; he never fails to enthrall and inspire. His enthusiasm for his subject is infectious.

 

For those of you unlucky enough not to be able to see the shows real-time, as it were, you can go here and watch them online at your leisure.

 

Patrick says, "Relax. And don't post-whore, under any circumstances. Like staring at the sun through a telescope or binoculars, it can easily blind you. And don't forget to check me out online, or I'll send Chris Lintott 'round to sort you out."

[Star Crossed 33]

Tonight's episode of The Sky At Night, "Return To The Red Planet" was about the European Space Agency's planned ExoMars mission to mars.

As has become customary, all of the outside-broadcast parts of the show were presented by Chris Lintott, but Sir Patrick was compelling, as ever, in his study, grilling the witnesses. He came out with this classic remark; "Well, picture an astronomer being pulled across the lunar surface... I don't know!"

 

Healthwise, he seems to be going from strength to strength and I think I know why. There's a particularly amateurish oil-painting here that's far too big to post, but I reckon he's been keeping it in his loft, Dorian Gray-styley. It's as if... he's... getting younger

 

If your obsession with the telescope-toting titan of television is unsatiated, you can buy the "authorised" Patrick Moore DVD, in which he discusses everything from Politics to Pluto. According to the webpage it is "often hugely funny". I don't doubt it; the man is a notorious card.

 

Patrick Moore is (allegedly) a party animal. Pills, powder, uppers, downers, all-arounders, swigging brandy, hitting the pipe, he's relentless; He's the kind of chap you'd like to party all night with, then engage in a jolly good stoned chinwag over a fry-up the next morning. Here's a picture of what your view might be whilst waiting for the fried bread to crisp up...

[BORLEYRECTORY 0]

NEW MEMBER NEW QUESTIONS!

 

FIRSTLY WE ALL KNOW WE LOVE PATRICK,BUT THERE ARE IMPORTANT QUESTIONS THAT NEED TO BE ANSWERED.IF,AS HE SAYS HE HAS REMAINED SINGLE SINCE HIS SWEET HEART DIED FROM ADOLFS WARMONGERY THEN WHAT PREY TELL HAS PAT BEEN JIZZING INTO/OVER THE LAST 60 YEARS??

I FOR ONE RECKON HIS UNDERSTUDY ON THE SKY AT NIGHT (THE GARETH KEENAN FROM THE OFFICE DOPPLEGANGER) IS WELL USED TO POINTING HIS 15" REFLECTOR AROUND PATS BLACK HOLE.

[Tuber Mirum 125]

Nice to have you on board new member BorleyRectory. Welcome.

 

Your questions have been troubling us too, for some time. An interesting theory you have there. Feel free to read this thread in its entirety for more details.

 

 

And do you have to shout? It's Sunday morning for crying out loud!

 

 

Caps lock is somewhere on the left of your keyboard.

[maryportfuncity 10,646]

Borley Rectory's questions have haunted me since I first encountered them. Tis true that Patrick has never been slow to find white spots at the end of his telescope, perhaps these twinking lights are satisfaction enough and he shares the uncertainties of many about the contents of black holes, or summat.

[BORLEYRECTORY 0]

Sorry for the shouting earlier everyone.If some of you have a vested financial interest in the demise of PM why not simply go round his house one evening dressed as a policeman (beadle style with crap beard and polio hand) and claim your here to take him into custody for wearing those hilarious 'nipster' trousers and those horses teeth gnashers he occasionally wears (are these the same ones as dennis watermans?) No doubt the idea of spending his last few years with Bubba in a cell will finish him off.(if you do this you are cruel and deserve to eat rod hulls decaying eyeballs.

[Banshees Scream 110]

NEW MEMBER NEW QUESTIONS!

 

FIRSTLY WE ALL KNOW WE LOVE PATRICK,BUT THERE ARE IMPORTANT QUESTIONS THAT NEED TO BE ANSWERED.IF,AS HE SAYS HE HAS REMAINED SINGLE SINCE HIS SWEET HEART DIED FROM ADOLFS WARMONGERY THEN WHAT PREY TELL HAS PAT BEEN JIZZING INTO/OVER THE LAST 60 YEARS??

I FOR ONE RECKON HIS UNDERSTUDY ON THE SKY AT NIGHT (THE GARETH KEENAN FROM THE OFFICE DOPPLEGANGER) IS WELL USED TO POINTING HIS 15" REFLECTOR AROUND PATS BLACK HOLE.

 

I have never met anyone so interested in an 83 year old mans love life. I don't really care what Patrick Moore does. This has got to be the most odd post since everybody was talking about Walter Cronkite banging Carly Simons sister.

 

Anyway the black hole theory sounds amusing. We have to find out how to bend space. How all the energy in space is conducted, that we are yet to discover. Somewhere there should be ways on earth, to travel at the speed of light. I'm talking science years and years into the future.

 

PS - I take it that you were aware that your Cap Lock button was down?

[maryportfuncity 10,646]

Patrick has made a lively contribution to the debate about Pluto's continuing status as a planet. It's probably nothing more than the press seeing the story coming and deciding to ring Patrick because everyone knows him but - either way - his responses indicate he's still with it.

[Banshees Scream 110]

Patrick has made a lively contribution to the debate about Pluto's continuing status as a planet. It's probably nothing more than the press seeing the story coming and deciding to ring Patrick because everyone knows him but - either way - his responses indicate he's still with it.

 

According to many viewers and advisors, they say he walks and seems very frail. The only reason why he is on this list probably. If his health seems steady by the holidays, I could see him off the list next year.

[BORLEYRECTORY 0]

I can tell you all right now why Patrick is on the list.Its obvious to anyone with means of eyes and a brain.Number 1= Patrick is an old man who is already past the average life expectancy of an average male in the UK.Number 2= Patrick is by his own admission "not long for this world,body shutting down etc etc..." if all you PM lovers regard the old chap with any genuine degree of intelligence then this gift straight from the "horse gnashers mouth" seals the argument.Oh and number 3,he is famous.And of course what the great man gets up to is worth knowing!! hence the autobiography.I actually know the guy as i arrange the imports of his hamsters and insertion tubes

[maryportfuncity 10,646]

It's a tough call this, they filmed him looking fairly dapper for the BBC News today but even young MPFC spotted the fact that he's always in the same black leather chair when he's interviewed. For all we know he had his jacket and tie on the top half whilst he sat on a commode.

[DevonDeathTrip 2,358]

Patrick has made a lively contribution to the debate about Pluto's continuing status as a planet.

 

 

Poor old Pluto. Always left out in the cold.

[BORLEYRECTORY 0]

STOP PRESS!!

Just seen Patrick out bodypopping on my street corner! when i enquired about his health he proceeded to become a "human beatbox" and rapped me out a string of mutha fu@kers and sutch.definately on the mend i'd say!

[Star Crossed 33]

STOP PRESS!!

Just seen Patrick out bodypopping on my street corner! when i enquired about his health he proceeded to become a "human beatbox" and rapped me out a string of mutha fu@kers and sutch.definately on the mend i'd say!

Sounds about right.

[Tempus Fugit 214]

STOP PRESS!!

Just seen Patrick out bodypopping on my street corner! when i enquired about his health he proceeded to become a "human beatbox" and rapped me out a string of mutha fu@kers and sutch.definately on the mend i'd say!

 

Deviant, it would serve you right if Patrick rammed his xylophone right up your rectum.

[maryportfuncity 10,646]

I think he means 'right up Uranus'.

[Slave to the Grave 26]

Which is of course easy to do when there is a full moon.

[BORLEYRECTORY 0]

HEY GUYS PATRICK HERE!

Using borleys computer as he and i are best buds.just to put your minds at ease i am in top shape.The human beatboxing has left me feeling chipper! off to the tent makers now for a fitting for me new slacks.byeeeeee! keep on truckin and remember.........Rod hulls eyeballs are delicious.

[maryportfuncity 10,646]

BR, I'd have to say five posts into your career that the sense of wild creative energy and hell for leather humour are amusing me.

 

A personal question if you don't mind; Do you live anywhere near the site of Borley Rectory?

[maryportfuncity 10,646]

For all the recent arrivals to the DL, I think it's time we reprised this class Patrick link.

[Tempus Fugit 214]

For all the recent arrivals to the DL, I think it's time we reprised this class Patrick link.

 

Tell it like it is Patrick, those EU bastards.

[Banshees Scream 110]

STOP PRESS!!

Just seen Patrick out bodypopping on my street corner! when i enquired about his health he proceeded to become a "human beatbox" and rapped me out a string of mutha fu@kers and sutch.definately on the mend i'd say!

 

Patrick may have overdosed on SPAM. I here that substance is very dangerous. Look out! He might be going blind soon...

[TLC 9]

STOP PRESS!!

Just seen Patrick out bodypopping on my street corner! when i enquired about his health he proceeded to become a "human beatbox" and rapped me out a string of mutha fu@kers and sutch.definately on the mend i'd say!

 

Deviant, it would serve you right if Patrick rammed his xylophone right up your rectum.

It would give you your very own personal 'human meatbox beatbox' to amuse yourself with, if nothing else. And every time you produced an air biscuit you'd have your own 'human windchime'.

 

I suggest 'The Borley Rectal Sound Machine' as a snappy stage name.

 

Need. More. Coffee.

[maryportfuncity 10,646]

I'm assuming most posters had an idea of the significance of our new arrival's name.

For those unaware, Borley Rectory was reckoned to be the most haunted house in England.

 

 

[Link fixed - ff]

Edited August 16, 2006 by football_fan

[Boleyn 1]

Just been on Radio 1

sounds like golem.

 

poor thing.