Fat And Fearless

[Dr. Zorders 1,271]

Article translation: AY AY AY, TOO A MANY TACO BELLS!

[Dr. Zorders 1,271]

I'm sorry, I apologise for that last joke, that was extra shitty. In fact, with this being a dull Sunday evening in Great Britain and that being my lame attempt to make it amusing, it felt like something out of Top Gear. (and the Top Gear guys did actually get intro trouble for making jokes about Mexicans not very long ago, and none of them were even funny). If I'm going to make more "racist" jokes in the future I promise they'll be at least mildly amusing ones.

[charon 4,943]

I'm sorry, I apologise for that last joke, that was extra shitty. In fact, with this being a dull Sunday evening in Great Britain and that being my lame attempt to make it amusing, it felt like something out of Top Gear. (and the Top Gear guys did actually get intro trouble for making jokes about Mexicans not very long ago, and none of them were even funny). If I'm going to make more "racist" jokes in the future I promise they'll be at least mildly amusing ones.

 

Sunday? If you think that, then thats the funny part...

[Dr. Zorders 1,271]

Yeah, it's a Bank Holiday here in the UK for all you dirty forei... er, I mean international DLers. That means a Monday off, that's why I thought it was Sunday.

 

*facepalm*

[CaptainChorizo 1,977]

yes he is dead I can confirm http://www.excelsior...14/05/26/961439

 

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2639872/Mexican-man-certified-worlds-heaviest-dies-48-years-old-867-pounds-years-confined-bed.html

 

Unique DDP hit for Noodle Squad thanks to Daily Mail

[Lard Bazaar 3,799]

I watched a documentary about Keith Martin, mentioned above and here http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-2471491/Saving-Britains-70-Stone-Man-Keith-Masons-ditch-attempt-lose-weight.html last night, and at the end it said he died this year of pneumonia, eight months after his surgery, but surprisingly I cannot find any link to this, unless I'm being thick.

[Toast 16,130]

I watched a documentary about Keith Martin, mentioned above and here http://www.dailymail...ose-weight.html last night, and at the end it said he died this year of pneumonia, eight months after his surgery, but surprisingly I cannot find any link to this, unless I'm being thick.

 

 

"Mr Martin, who lives with Tina and his other sister, Sharon, who has special needs"

 

What, and he didn't have "special needs"?

 

I suspect that mealy-mouthed PC phrase was far more appropriate and descriptive of his situation than of hers.

[Bibliogryphon 9,570]

I watched a documentary about Keith Martin, mentioned above and here http://www.dailymail...ose-weight.html last night, and at the end it said he died this year of pneumonia, eight months after his surgery, but surprisingly I cannot find any link to this, unless I'm being thick.

 

 

"Mr Martin, who lives with Tina and his other sister, Sharon, who has special needs"

 

What, and he didn't have "special needs"?

 

I suspect that mealy-mouthed PC phrase was far more appropriate and descriptive of his situation than of hers.

 

I think he had special feeds.

[Guest Guest]

I watched a documentary about Keith Martin, mentioned above and here http://www.dailymail...ose-weight.html last night, and at the end it said he died this year of pneumonia, eight months after his surgery, but surprisingly I cannot find any link to this, unless I'm being thick.

 

 

"Mr Martin, who lives with Tina and his other sister, Sharon, who has special needs"

 

What, and he didn't have "special needs"?

 

I suspect that mealy-mouthed PC phrase was far more appropriate and descriptive of his situation than of hers.

 

I think he had special feeds.

 

http://www.mirror.co...-martin-4751943

[Lard Bazaar 3,799]

I watched a documentary about Keith Martin, mentioned above and here http://www.dailymail...ose-weight.html last night, and at the end it said he died this year of pneumonia, eight months after his surgery, but surprisingly I cannot find any link to this, unless I'm being thick.

 

 

"Mr Martin, who lives with Tina and his other sister, Sharon, who has special needs"

 

What, and he didn't have "special needs"?

 

I suspect that mealy-mouthed PC phrase was far more appropriate and descriptive of his situation than of hers.

 

I think he had special feeds.

 

http://www.mirror.co...-martin-4751943

 

I'm not understanding why this is in the news now, he died in March.

[maryportfuncity 10,642]

 

 

Carl Thompson

 

 

All 65st stone of it, made the front pages of The Sun and Express today, which may have summat to do with both papers being rabidly Tory and desperate to draw attention away from David Cameron's inability to establish a winning lead for next Thursday.

 

Either way, yer man above is shipping 10,000 calories a day, hell bent on becoming Britain's biggest beyond dispute and cruising for contention in our 2016 lists, assuming the Magnum lollies and copious carry out binges don't do for him sooner than that.

[maryportfuncity 10,642]

 

 

Another utterly uncalled for shot of a mountain of blubber. Georgia Davies, went to hospital last week after a fall, but only after a massive hole was knocked in the front wall of her house.

 

Currently reckoned to tip the scales around 54 stone.

[DevonDeathTrip 2,358]

Maybe Georgia Davies and Carl Thompson should do lunch. They could compare notes and share anecdotes, perhaps over a spinach salad with balsamic vinaigrette.

[maryportfuncity 10,642]

Maybe Georgia Davies and Carl Thompson should do lunch. They could compare notes and share anecdotes, perhaps over a spinach salad with balsamic vinaigrette.

 

 

Car crash tv gold DDT. I was thinking of something more cruel, like hiding a chinese meal in a locked box and then throwing the key at both of them.

[Lord Fellatio Nelson 6,218]

Id like to see them both locked in a room WITHOUT any food and we could then see who would be forced to eat who first or summat.

 

[Sir Creep 7,070]

 

Maybe Georgia Davies and Carl Thompson should do lunch. They could compare notes and share anecdotes, perhaps over a spinach salad with balsamic vinaigrette.

 

Car crash tv gold DDT. I was thinking of something more cruel, like hiding a chinese meal in a locked box and then throwing the key at both of them.

 

I'd like to see them in a contest they have to choose between watching the other contestant eat a buffet in front of them OR listen to a taped loop of the extremely tiresome 'I'm fat and making jokes about being fat' humor of the late John Pinette (d 2014). Is choose the former, less painful.

SirC

[maryportfuncity 10,642]

 

 

Maybe Georgia Davies and Carl Thompson should do lunch. They could compare notes and share anecdotes, perhaps over a spinach salad with balsamic vinaigrette.

 

Car crash tv gold DDT. I was thinking of something more cruel, like hiding a chinese meal in a locked box and then throwing the key at both of them.

 

I'd like to see them in a contest they have to choose between watching the other contestant eat a buffet in front of them OR listen to a taped loop of the extremely tiresome 'I'm fat and making jokes about being fat' humor of the late John Pinette (d 2014). Is choose the former, less painful.

SirC

 

 

 

For those unfamiliar with Pinette's foodie fun:

 

http://www.bing.com/videos/search?q=john+pinette+%2b+you+tube&qpvt=john+pinette+%2b+you+tube&FORM=VDRE&adlt=strict#view=detail&mid=D2E340A223F8AF542C55D2E340A223F8AF542C55

[gcreptile 10,964]

 

 

Another utterly uncalled for shot of a mountain of blubber. Georgia Davies, went to hospital last week after a fall, but only after a massive hole was knocked in the front wall of her house.

 

Currently reckoned to tip the scales around 54 stone.

The crane got her out, the crane will get her in:

 

http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/georgia-davis-heavy-duty-crane-winch-5634293

 

I actually wanted to post the original story last week. The girl has a sort-of claim to national fame as Britain's formerly fattest teenager, and she has already had health problems (not that surprising)

 

Maybe Georgia Davies and Carl Thompson should do lunch. They could compare notes and share anecdotes, perhaps over a spinach salad with balsamic vinaigrette.

 

They should have a contest of eating each other to death.

[maryportfuncity 10,642]

 

 

 

Another utterly uncalled for shot of a mountain of blubber. Georgia Davies, went to hospital last week after a fall, but only after a massive hole was knocked in the front wall of her house.

 

Currently reckoned to tip the scales around 54 stone.

The crane got her out, the crane will get her in:

 

http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/georgia-davis-heavy-duty-crane-winch-5634293

 

I actually wanted to post the original story last week. The girl has a sort-of claim to national fame as Britain's formerly fattest teenager, and she has already had health problems (not that surprising)

 

Maybe Georgia Davies and Carl Thompson should do lunch. They could compare notes and share anecdotes, perhaps over a spinach salad with balsamic vinaigrette.

 

They should have a contest of eating each other to death.

 

 

 

So, as in hockey, there'd be a face off!

[gcreptile 10,964]

Even more on Georgia Davis:

 

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3067016/She-s-just-young-girl-fighting-addiction-Mother-Britain-s-fattest-woman-tells-55st-daughter-s-torment-22-year-old-rescued-flat-crane.html

 

She's on anti-deppresants, recently had a fall and a severe infection. This was really sad: She (her mother) insists Georgia is now eating salads and greens in a bid to lose weight, though she admits the occasional takeaway and plates of sausage and chips are also part of her daughter’s diet.

[Lard Bazaar 3,799]

Stories like this really piss me off, and I speak as a mammoth fatty myself. I'm fat because I eat too much of the wrong foods, none of the right foods, and sit on my bulbous buttocks all day long. Some people know why they overeat - I don't know why I do - it's not because I was fingered by Ben and Jerry when I was a child, nor did I have nightmares about my favourite childhood pet being bludgeoned to death with a spring onion, thus putting me off salad for life - it's probably just because I'm a greedy bitch who loves crisps.

 

It's not the lardasses that get my piss boiling (well, it is a bit), it's the fucking families. 'Oh boo hoo, she's going to die if she doesn't stop eating' - yeh, well how the fuck is she getting hold of all the shit food if she's so fat she can't fucking move? YOU'RE GIVING IT TO HER YOU MASSIVE CUNT! Stop giving in to their pleas for KFC and say fucking NO! Bring them a plate of veg and if she's that hungry she'll fucking eat it eventually.

 

I feel slightly sorry for heffers because if you're addicted to food, you're fucked, because you can't live without eating - an alcy can still live without booze, a smoker can still live without fags, but nobody can live without eating something. Having said that, one has to exercise (pah!) a degree of self-discipline and moderation, and that's what tonka-trucks don't do. Bottom line is, her mum needs to stop ENABLING her.

[Dr. Zorders 1,271]

Stories like this really piss me off, and I speak as a mammoth fatty myself. I'm fat because I eat too much of the wrong foods, none of the right foods, and sit on my bulbous buttocks all day long. Some people know why they overeat - I don't know why I do - it's not because I was fingered by Ben and Jerry when I was a child, nor did I have nightmares about my favourite childhood pet being bludgeoned to death with a spring onion, thus putting me off salad for life - it's probably just because I'm a greedy bitch who loves crisps.

 

It's not the lardasses that get my piss boiling (well, it is a bit), it's the fucking families. 'Oh boo hoo, she's going to die if she doesn't stop eating' - yeh, well how the fuck is she getting hold of all the shit food if she's so fat she can't fucking move? YOU'RE GIVING IT TO HER YOU MASSIVE CUNT! Stop giving in to their pleas for KFC and say fucking NO! Bring them a plate of veg and if she's that hungry she'll fucking eat it eventually.

 

I feel slightly sorry for heffers because if you're addicted to food, you're fucked, because you can't live without eating - an alcy can still live without booze, a smoker can still live without fags, but nobody can live without eating something. Having said that, one has to exercise (pah!) a degree of self-discipline and moderation, and that's what tonka-trucks don't do. Bottom line is, her mum needs to stop ENABLING her.

Agreed. They need to get rid of the enabling act.

[maryportfuncity 10,642]

Stories like this really piss me off, and I speak as a mammoth fatty myself. I'm fat because I eat too much of the wrong foods, none of the right foods, and sit on my bulbous buttocks all day long. Some people know why they overeat - I don't know why I do - it's not because I was fingered by Ben and Jerry when I was a child, nor did I have nightmares about my favourite childhood pet being bludgeoned to death with a spring onion, thus putting me off salad for life - it's probably just because I'm a greedy bitch who loves crisps.

 

It's not the lardasses that get my piss boiling (well, it is a bit), it's the fucking families. 'Oh boo hoo, she's going to die if she doesn't stop eating' - yeh, well how the fuck is she getting hold of all the shit food if she's so fat she can't fucking move? YOU'RE GIVING IT TO HER YOU MASSIVE CUNT! Stop giving in to their pleas for KFC and say fucking NO! Bring them a plate of veg and if she's that hungry she'll fucking eat it eventually.

 

I feel slightly sorry for heffers because if you're addicted to food, you're fucked, because you can't live without eating - an alcy can still live without booze, a smoker can still live without fags, but nobody can live without eating something. Having said that, one has to exercise (pah!) a degree of self-discipline and moderation, and that's what tonka-trucks don't do. Bottom line is, her mum needs to stop ENABLING her.

 

 

You've considered newspaper columns as a source of income, right? Because - frankly - you said the same thing as a Sun columnist I read today, only she took more words to say it less well, though doubtless pocketed decent dosh for doing so.

[maryportfuncity 10,642]

 

 

 

Another utterly uncalled for shot of a mountain of blubber. Georgia Davies, went to hospital last week after a fall, but only after a massive hole was knocked in the front wall of her house.

 

Currently reckoned to tip the scales around 54 stone.

The crane got her out, the crane will get her in:

 

http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/georgia-davis-heavy-duty-crane-winch-5634293

 

I actually wanted to post the original story last week. The girl has a sort-of claim to national fame as Britain's formerly fattest teenager, and she has already had health problems (not that surprising)

 

Maybe Georgia Davies and Carl Thompson should do lunch. They could compare notes and share anecdotes, perhaps over a spinach salad with balsamic vinaigrette.

 

They should have a contest of eating each other to death.

 

 

 

So, I've refined my idea, a bit.

 

 

Georgia Davies and Carl Thomas each sit at opposite ends of a gym, in which there is a large, lockable, box. A massive chinese carry out is brought in to stink the place out, placed in the box and locked away. Georgia and Carl know the key to open the box is taped to a wallbar, and is 15 feet up. Together, they can, just about, contrive to reach it. But neither one wants to share the grub.

 

That's an hour of "reality" television gold right there!

[gcreptile 10,964]

 

 

 

 

Another utterly uncalled for shot of a mountain of blubber. Georgia Davies, went to hospital last week after a fall, but only after a massive hole was knocked in the front wall of her house.

 

Currently reckoned to tip the scales around 54 stone.

The crane got her out, the crane will get her in:

 

http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/georgia-davis-heavy-duty-crane-winch-5634293

 

I actually wanted to post the original story last week. The girl has a sort-of claim to national fame as Britain's formerly fattest teenager, and she has already had health problems (not that surprising)

 

Maybe Georgia Davies and Carl Thompson should do lunch. They could compare notes and share anecdotes, perhaps over a spinach salad with balsamic vinaigrette.

 

They should have a contest of eating each other to death.

 

 

 

So, I've refined my idea, a bit.

 

 

Georgia Davies and Carl Thomas each sit at opposite ends of a gym, in which there is a large, lockable, box. A massive chinese carry out is brought in to stink the place out, placed in the box and locked away. Georgia and Carl know the key to open the box is taped to a wallbar, and is 15 feet up. Together, they can, just about, contrive to reach it. But neither one wants to share the grub.

 

That's an hour of "reality" television gold right there!

 

I think one of the Saw movies had a scene like that.