harrymcnallysblueandwhitearmy 1,698 Posted October 24, 2021 They're probably already in here a hundred times, but Tesco. Specifically, their website and IT. I always add one item so my basket as you need a placeholder to keep the timeslot, then add items the day before. In this case, the day before was yesterday, with my order set to arrive this morning. Except that their site has been down for 24 hours so I couldn't update. They didn't have the decency to bring me my one banana either - they just cancelled the order, with the brassneck to say 'you cancelled your order' on the email. So I'm stuck out here in the middle of nowhere with barely any provisions, and no baccy or ice cream at all. I'm fucking disabled, Tesco, you cunts!!! Well, sort of. Ask a DLer time - what's a decent alternative? Asda? Aldi/Lidl? 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Redrumours 861 Posted October 24, 2021 3 hours ago, harrymcnallysblueandwhitearmy said: They're probably already in here a hundred times, but Tesco. Specifically, their website and IT. I always add one item so my basket as you need a placeholder to keep the timeslot, then add items the day before. In this case, the day before was yesterday, with my order set to arrive this morning. Except that their site has been down for 24 hours so I couldn't update. They didn't have the decency to bring me my one banana either - they just cancelled the order, with the brassneck to say 'you cancelled your order' on the email. So I'm stuck out here in the middle of nowhere with barely any provisions, and no baccy or ice cream at all. I'm fucking disabled, Tesco, you cunts!!! Well, sort of. Ask a DLer time - what's a decent alternative? Asda? Aldi/Lidl? I am seriously thinking of Emigrating to Reykjavic. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
harrymcnallysblueandwhitearmy 1,698 Posted October 24, 2021 2 hours ago, Redrumours said: I am seriously thinking of Emigrating to Reykjavic. I don't think there's an Iceland near me, so I got an Asda account instead - delivering tomorrow morning. Bye bye Tesco, look after yourself. Do Asda still advertise with women spanking their arses? 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bibliogryphon 9,597 Posted October 25, 2021 17 hours ago, harrymcnallysblueandwhitearmy said: I don't think there's an Iceland near me, so I got an Asda account instead - delivering tomorrow morning. Bye bye Tesco, look after yourself. Do Asda still advertise with women spanking their arses? A couple of my former colleagues went to work for the Asda clothing brand George. At corporate training events staff were encouraged to perform the Asda value pat. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
harrymcnallysblueandwhitearmy 1,698 Posted October 25, 2021 6 minutes ago, Bibliogryphon said: A couple of my former colleagues went to work for the Asda clothing brand George. At corporate training events staff were encouraged to perform the Asda value pat. On each other? I like the idea of corporate grope meetings, as long as I didn’t get Ethel from Accounts. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bibliogryphon 9,597 Posted October 25, 2021 4 minutes ago, harrymcnallysblueandwhitearmy said: On each other? I like the idea of corporate grope meetings, as long as I didn’t get Ethel from Accounts. No I think they were expected to only grope their own arses. This was quite a few years ago though Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
harrymcnallysblueandwhitearmy 1,698 Posted October 25, 2021 24 minutes ago, Bibliogryphon said: No I think they were expected to only grope their own arses. This was quite a few years ago though I supect the shenanigans of DLT - the Hairy Cornflake himself - and other Radio 1 DJs has irreparably damaged the arse-groping market in these more enlightened times. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
time 8,645 Posted October 25, 2021 If any game show belongs in Room 101, its Tipping Point. Where the fuck do they get these contestants from? Thicker than thickest thick thing you can think of. Denser than the densest dense thing you can think of (and I say that as someone who's had a relative appear on it). Flightless bird on the New Zealand dollar coin? Penguin. Apart from Nectar, what does Homer, in his Epic poems, describe as the food of the Gods? Doughnuts. ITV have to be taking the piss surely. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
msc 18,491 Posted October 25, 2021 25 minutes ago, time said: If any game show belongs in Room 101, its Tipping Point. Where the fuck do they get these contestants from? Thicker than thickest thick thing you can think of. Denser than the densest dense thing you can think of (and I say that as someone who's had a relative appear on it). Flightless bird on the New Zealand dollar coin? Penguin. Apart from Nectar, what does Homer, in his Epic poems, describe as the food of the Gods? Doughnuts. ITV have to be taking the piss surely. They look for folk who will be interesting on TV, not folk who necessarily might be good at quizzes. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
harrymcnallysblueandwhitearmy 1,698 Posted October 25, 2021 24 minutes ago, msc said: They look for folk who will be interesting on TV, not folk who necessarily might be good at quizzes. They do for that type of quiz (substitute interesting for annoying) but not the 15 to 1 type, where they asked us to be as ugly and boring as possible, so as not to show up William G ‘Exciting’ Stewart. If you got some questions right at the audition you were in, it seemed to me. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
msc 18,491 Posted October 25, 2021 22 minutes ago, harrymcnallysblueandwhitearmy said: They do for that type of quiz (substitute interesting for annoying) but not the 15 to 1 type, where they asked us to be as ugly and boring as possible, so as not to show up William G ‘Exciting’ Stewart. If you got some questions right at the audition you were in, it seemed to me. Ditto Mastermind, iirc, (neither of which have any dosh on the line) but I mean more stuff like Tipping Point, The Chase, Eggheads, etc. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
time 8,645 Posted October 25, 2021 51 minutes ago, msc said: They look for folk who will be interesting on TV, not folk who necessarily might be good at quizzes. I get that, but this particular show seems to plumb depths other shows can only dream of. Here's the Homer question, as it appeared: Every time I see any of this program it drags me in to see how bad that days competitors are (in my defence, I was reading and needed a break for something lighter this afternoon). Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Toast 16,170 Posted October 25, 2021 25 minutes ago, time said: I get that, but this particular show seems to plumb depths other shows can only dream of. Here's the Homer question, as it appeared: Every time I see any of this program it drags me in to see how bad that days competitors are (in my defence, I was reading and needed a break for something lighter this afternoon). He thought the question was about The Simpsons, didn't he? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lord Fellatio Nelson 6,221 Posted October 26, 2021 Ok. Lets shove all the climate change c*nts in here, along with the pandemic nut jobs and the twats still banging on about Brexit even though the ship sailed long ago, Basically, they need to all shut the fuck up and let us live and breathe without being bombarded with end of world scenarios. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TQR 14,414 Posted October 26, 2021 26 minutes ago, Lord Fellatio Nelson said: Ok. Lets shove all the climate change c*nts in here, along with the pandemic nut jobs and the twats still banging on about Brexit even though the ship sailed long ago, Basically, they need to all shut the fuck up and let us live and breathe without being bombarded with end of world scenarios. Do you not see the irony in saying “let us live and breathe” when that’s exactly what they (climate change cunts in particular, and cunts many of them are too) want us to be able to do for the long haul? Inconvenient as the truth may be, both the climate disaster and the Brexit disaster really are an enormous tumour in the arsehole of society that will just metastasise and grow if we ignore it. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lord Fellatio Nelson 6,221 Posted October 26, 2021 10 minutes ago, TQR said: Do you not see the irony in saying “let us live and breathe” when that’s exactly what they (climate change cunts in particular, and cunts many of them are too) want us to be able to do for the long haul? Inconvenient as the truth may be, both the climate disaster and the Brexit disaster really are an enormous tumour in the arsehole of society that will just metastasise and grow if we ignore it. They have been banging on about climate change for decades, even the Osmond's sang a fucking song about it. Are we all dead? No. Will going carbon neutral tomorrow stop climate change? No. Is enough being done to counter the effects that climate change is bringing to areas of the planet? No. Have we all starved to death and been priced out of Nutella because we left the EU? No. Are we likely to become the 87 richest country on Earth instead of the 6th ( or there abouts) because of Brexit? No.. *The End. *but not the end. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TQR 14,414 Posted October 26, 2021 1 hour ago, Lord Fellatio Nelson said: They have been banging on about climate change for decades, even the Osmond's sang a fucking song about it. Are we all dead? No. Will going carbon neutral tomorrow stop climate change? No. Is enough being done to counter the effects that climate change is bringing to areas of the planet? No. Have we all starved to death and been priced out of Nutella because we left the EU? No. Are we likely to become the 87 richest country on Earth instead of the 6th ( or there abouts) because of Brexit? No.. *The End. *but not the end. Okay, so it’s alright because we’re not dead yet. Brexit has made us worse off in every way and we’ve all got every right to be pissing blood about it, and we will continue to until either it is reversed or climate change boils/chokes/drowns us to death* because we’ve done bollocks all about it for the past 50 years and haven’t bothered doing much else now because it’s too late, older/dead generations have fucked the planet to kingdom come already. The anger on both of these is justified. Might not single-handedly solve fuck all but it’s justified. *Though, on the bright side, at least that’d include the Osmonds. Every cloud and all that. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lord Fellatio Nelson 6,221 Posted October 26, 2021 4 minutes ago, TQR said: Okay, so it’s alright because we’re not dead yet. Brexit has made us worse off in every way and we’ve all got every right to be pissing blood about it, and we will continue to until either it is reversed or climate change boils/chokes/drowns us to death* because we’ve done bollocks all about it for the past 50 years and haven’t bothered doing much else now because it’s too late, older/dead generations have fucked the planet to kingdom come already. The anger on both of these is justified. Might not single-handedly solve fuck all but it’s justified. *Though, on the bright side, at least that’d include the Osmonds. Every cloud and all that. If ya feel that way just go and dig a hole somewhere, lay in it and wait.... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TQR 14,414 Posted October 26, 2021 1 hour ago, Lord Fellatio Nelson said: If ya feel that way just go and dig a hole somewhere, lay in it and wait.... Why bleeding should I? Fucking idiots have put us in this woeful state, and I shall be part of the huge, growing movement to let them know that’s exactly what they are. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lord Fellatio Nelson 6,221 Posted October 26, 2021 8 minutes ago, TQR said: Why bleeding should I? Fucking idiots have put us in this woeful state, and I shall be part of the huge, growing movement to let them know that’s exactly what they are. The only 'growing movement' is a bowel movement. You follow your own path fella. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TQR 14,414 Posted October 26, 2021 31 minutes ago, Lord Fellatio Nelson said: The only 'growing movement' is a bowel movement. You follow your own path fella. It’s a great analogy; slowly but surely, the current, stubborn, festering shit which no longer belongs in the body will be expelled. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lord Fellatio Nelson 6,221 Posted October 27, 2021 21 hours ago, TQR said: It’s a great analogy; slowly but surely, the current, stubborn, festering shit which no longer belongs in the body will be expelled. Something like that. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Philheybrookbay1 247 Posted November 14, 2021 Upselling at checkouts. Specially Savers. I go in for my airfresher plug in refill. No basket. Get the till holding plug in for £3 with a £5 note. I put it down and clearly say ”Just this thank you” Girl scans and starts “we have this aftershave on special offer” pointing to a name I’ve never heard of. I nicely say but firmly “No”. It must be bloody obvious I don’t want cheap aftershave and certainly not the sort which could blister gloss paint at 10 paces. I want my plug in and here’s how I’m going to pay for it. That’s all. Grips my s*** 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lord Fellatio Nelson 6,221 Posted November 14, 2021 6 hours ago, Philheybrookbay1 said: Upselling at checkouts. Specially Savers. I go in for my airfresher plug in refill. No basket. Get the till holding plug in for £3 with a £5 note. I put it down and clearly say ”Just this thank you” Girl scans and starts “we have this aftershave on special offer” pointing to a name I’ve never heard of. I nicely say but firmly “No”. It must be bloody obvious I don’t want cheap aftershave and certainly not the sort which could blister gloss paint at 10 paces. I want my plug in and here’s how I’m going to pay for it. That’s all. Grips my s*** Well, it's not bloody obvious to us , is it! For all we know you could hum like a wrestlers jockstrap and the assistant was just trying to be helpful, or summat. Just sayin, like.. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Toast 16,170 Posted November 14, 2021 16 minutes ago, Lord Fellatio Nelson said: Well, it's not bloody obvious to us , is it! For all we know you could hum like a wrestlers jockstrap and the assistant was just trying to be helpful, or summat. Just sayin, like.. Nah, the poor sods are under orders to say it. Same at WH Smith, always trying to sell us choocolate. They must hate it as much as we do. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
