Lord Fellatio Nelson 6,218 Posted October 16, 2009 Today marks the first snow fall of the year and it seems like autumn hasn't even been given a chance. I hear it's going to be cold in Portugal, colder than one can bear. The fireplaces will be growing dim and the temperatures are going to be grim. I know that you know something that we do not, Clive. People have called you Jack Jones, they call you Granddad. They say that your forever, yeah, they say that your forever. So, after all the long hard winters that you've been through, I've decided that you must finally wrap yourself with the snugly to survive. Yes, it's $39.99 dollar value and it can be yours at that price guaranteed. Yes, I know it was a cheap and unimaginative gimmick which was poorly executed. What was that Clive? I'm out of my what? Oh, so you want me to return in the month of November. I don't know about that Clive, where there ain't no love there ain't no magic. What? I've made a deal with death? To death till I die? Well, I thought the Breakfast Hour thread might be original. I don't know Clive, first it was your eyes that went. Alright Clive, I'll think about it. But you take care of yourself, Clive. Maybe you have some of those long hard winters left in you. Ah Banshees, we've been expecting you. LEGAL DISCLAIMER: If you are not him/her, your drivel is of equal standing. It cant possibly be him, a whole page of drivel and he hasnt mentioned how great he is once.... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Windsor 2,233 Posted October 16, 2009 sh*te Welcome back, donkey-wipe. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Tuber Mirum 125 Posted October 17, 2009 A superficial stylistic analysis leaves me asking, "where are all the malapropisms? It can't be Dr. Scream." But my Moderator's Magical Looking Device tells me that it is someone who uses the same internet provider as he, which narrows it down to him and a few hundred thousand or so others. My theory is it's the No Child Left Behind program kicking in. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Monoclinic 39 Posted October 17, 2009 A superficial stylistic analysis leaves me asking, "where are all the malapropisms? It can't be Dr. Scream."But my Moderator's Magical Looking Device tells me that it is someone who uses the same internet provider as he, which narrows it down to him and a few hundred thousand or so others. My theory is it's the No Child Left Behind program kicking in. Exhibit A '...colder than one can bear.' Exhibit B '...your forever.' He has also had several months to work on this 'comeback' post. 2009 has been a year for comebacks, Michael Jackson, Boyzone, Banshees. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Tuber Mirum 125 Posted October 17, 2009 A superficial stylistic analysis leaves me asking, "where are all the malapropisms? It can't be Dr. Scream."But my Moderator's Magical Looking Device tells me that it is someone who uses the same internet provider as he, which narrows it down to him and a few hundred thousand or so others. My theory is it's the No Child Left Behind program kicking in. Exhibit A '...colder than one can bear.' Exhibit B '...your forever.' He has also had several months to work on this 'comeback' post. 2009 has been a year for comebacks, Michael Jackson, Boyzone, Banshees. What's wrong with "colder than one can bear"? Apart from being clumsy, affected and generally hideous I mean. And anyway, BS always wrote "then" when he meant "than". Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Monoclinic 39 Posted October 17, 2009 A superficial stylistic analysis leaves me asking, "where are all the malapropisms? It can't be Dr. Scream."But my Moderator's Magical Looking Device tells me that it is someone who uses the same internet provider as he, which narrows it down to him and a few hundred thousand or so others. My theory is it's the No Child Left Behind program kicking in. Exhibit A '...colder than one can bear.' Exhibit B '...your forever.' He has also had several months to work on this 'comeback' post. 2009 has been a year for comebacks, Michael Jackson, Boyzone, Banshees. What's wrong with "colder than one can bear"? Apart from being clumsy, affected and generally hideous I mean. And anyway, BS always wrote "then" when he meant "than". Probably nothing, sorry. I still think it's him, evidence or not (can I play the woman's intuition card please?). The vision of a naked CD shivering in Portugal might put you off your calamares but there are expressions in there which, to me, spank of Banshees. By the way, was Hofmeister a one can bear? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Tuber Mirum 125 Posted October 18, 2009 Had to look that up, not having the faintest clue what you were on about. How sad to see that Kestrel Lager is no more. Yes I think it's him too, doubtless lured back by yet another poetry competition. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
The Watcher 317 Posted October 29, 2009 Who is still left from Dad's Army apart from Dunn?I'm sure Ian Lavender is still about? Although two have died this year, ghere are still afew left from Dad's Army apart from the Immortal Jack Jones! Firstly the two who have died are Eric Longworth(approx 90) who played the Town Clerk & looked old 35 years ago! The other one who died was Colin Bean(approx 84) & he played Private Sponge. The other survivors are Bill Pertwee (Air Warden Hodges), Pamela Cundell (Mrs Fox) & Frank Williams (The Vicar) - he's outlived The Verger by 32 years - it had been hoped that they could star as a double act in a sit-com. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Tuber Mirum 125 Posted October 29, 2009 Bill Pertwee, didn't he play one of the doctors in the Doctor Who-franchise? If I am wrong, I am sorry. In that case you are sorry. It was Jon Pertwee who played the Doctor. Bill was his cousin. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Terminator 13 Posted October 30, 2009 Bill Pertwee, didn't he play one of the doctors in the Doctor Who-franchise? If I am wrong, I am sorry. In that case you are sorry. It was Jon Pertwee who played the Doctor. Bill was his cousin. I am still suprised I had it almost right, seeing that this was long before my time and I am not a Brit. As a side note, Bill did work with Jon in an episode of Worzel Gummidge. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TAFKAG 70 Posted November 19, 2009 Does anyone not have Dunny on google alert? I mean, imagine the kudos of being the first to report the Death of All Deaths (assuming he's not immortal, of course) - it'd be like being Neil Armstrong or Tenzing Norgay Edmund Hillary. Then there's the Russian roulette of actually being online when the news comes through, or having your phone close to hand. Then you might get a huge dose of nerves affecting your typing fingers as you picture the horror of Guest Arsehole beating you to the punch. And after all that, it might just be a Fidelesque hoax. Really, it's just not worth it. I received a rare Dunn alert, which sent my poor heart racing. But it was a red herring and was actually about Bill Pertwee, who I'm pleased to see is still out and about, meeting the the Barmy Dad's Army in deepest Somerset. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
DevonDeathTrip 2,358 Posted January 9, 2010 Happy 90th Birthday, Clive!!! May you be on the list for many more years to come. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
The Watcher 317 Posted January 15, 2010 Happy 90th Birthday, Clive!!! May you be on the list for many more years to come. Why do comedians often live so long? Apart from "Jonesy" (Clive Dunn), there is Bill Pertwee, Eric Sykes, Peter Sallis, Frank Thornton, Barry Howard,June Whitfield, Roy Hudd, ............ Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Canadian Paul 97 Posted January 15, 2010 Happy 90th Birthday, Clive!!! May you be on the list for many more years to come. Why do comedians often live so long? Apart from "Jonesy" (Clive Dunn), there is Bill Pertwee, Eric Sykes, Peter Sallis, Frank Thornton, Barry Howard,June Whitfield, Roy Hudd, ............ Someone told me that laughter is good for the body... forget how they explained it though. I guess you've got to find your own antics amusing for that to work as a comedian though... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Handrejka 1,904 Posted January 15, 2010 Happy 90th Birthday, Clive!!! May you be on the list for many more years to come. Why do comedians often live so long? Apart from "Jonesy" (Clive Dunn), there is Bill Pertwee, Eric Sykes, Peter Sallis, Frank Thornton, Barry Howard,June Whitfield, Roy Hudd, ............ None of those you have mentioned are comedians, they are comic actors, so your point is not valid. None of those people would be anything without script and even with a script June Whitfield is not sodding funny. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
themaninblack 2,112 Posted January 15, 2010 Happy 90th Birthday, Clive!!! May you be on the list for many more years to come. Why do comedians often live so long? Apart from "Jonesy" (Clive Dunn), there is Bill Pertwee, Eric Sykes, Peter Sallis, Frank Thornton, Barry Howard,June Whitfield, Roy Hudd, ............ Well this one didn't... nor did this one... or this one... and indeed 58 aint that old... It's like saying gay people don't live long because they're gay... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
The Watcher 317 Posted January 16, 2010 Bob Hope - 100 years before he went to the Great Comedy Club in the sky. George Burns - 100 years before he stopped making Americans laugh. They were both comedians as well as being comic actors. Too many people - especially in the media - try to pigeon-hole 'celebrities' into one category at the expense of all others. Fair enough that Jordan and Naomi Campbell are NOT authors - well not in the recognised sense!!! - but people such as Roy Hudd and June Whitfield ARE comedians as well as comic actors as are Eric Sykes and Russ Abbott. The fact that so many die young such as Tony Hancock, Kenneth Williams, Eric Morecombe, James Beck, Richard Beckinsdale is due to either: Depression, An excess of nervous energy Alcohol abuse Heart problems - often due to their life/work balance and the effort required to make people laugh. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Geronimo 3 Posted January 17, 2010 Bob Hope - 100 years before he went to the Great Comedy Club in the sky. George Burns - 100 years before he stopped making Americans laugh. They were both comedians as well as being comic actors. Too many people - especially in the media - try to pigeon-hole 'celebrities' into one category at the expense of all others. Fair enough that Jordan and Naomi Campbell are NOT authors - well not in the recognised sense!!! - but people such as Roy Hudd and June Whitfield ARE comedians as well as comic actors as are Eric Sykes and Russ Abbott. The fact that so many die young such as Tony Hancock, Kenneth Williams, Eric Morecombe, James Beck, Richard Beckinsdale is due to either: Depression, An excess of nervous energy Alcohol abuse Heart problems - often due to their life/work balance and the effort required to make people laugh. It might make an interesting academic study sponsored by the Wheeltappers and Shunters' Social Club where June Whitfield, had she ever appeared, would have enjoyed superstar status. Much useful DDP material in some of these YouTube WT&SSC clips. Kathy Kirby could have been a unique pick for someone this year. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Madcow 6 Posted January 29, 2010 Amid the furore over ebay's banning and subsequent apology over the Dad's Army game, I had a quick squizz at the other other 1541 'not banned' items and found this little gem at £29.99! http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?Vie...%3D1&_rdc=1 A bargain, as other sellers have similar items for twice the price. Potential for a Death Lister investment, perhaps? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
The Watcher 317 Posted January 30, 2010 Amid the furore over ebay's banning and subsequent apology over the Dad's Army game, I had a quick squizz at the other other 1541 'not banned' items and found this little gem at £29.99! http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?Vie...%3D1&_rdc=1 A bargain, as other sellers have similar items for twice the price. Potential for a Death Lister investment, perhaps? Colin Bean (Private Sponge) & Eric Longworth (The Town Clerk) both died last year so that only leaves Frank Williams (The Vicar - who has outlived The Verger by over 30 years!), Bill Pertwee (The ARP Warden), Ian Lavender (Pike), Pamela Cundell (Mrs Fox & the widow of Bill Frazer!) & of course, CLIVE DUNN. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
McDunn 0 Posted February 13, 2010 My name is McDunn. Connor McDunn...from the clan McDunn We are are Immortal! So glad to see one of our own is doing so well on your list. He will be there for some time!!!! HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Magere Hein 1,400 Posted February 13, 2010 My name is McDunn. Connor McDunn...from the clan McDunn We are are Immortal! So glad to see one of our own is doing so well on your list. He will be there for some time!!!! HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!! Welcome to DeathList, McDunn, where only the dead go scot free. I'm glad to learn you're enjoying sourself so well. Mr Dunn's been here almost forever and I expect him to stay forever as well. regards, Hein Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
The Watcher 317 Posted February 13, 2010 My name is McDunn. Connor McDunn...from the clan McDunn We are are Immortal! So glad to see one of our own is doing so well on your list. He will be there for some time!!!! HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!! Welcome to DeathList, McDunn, where only the dead go scot free. I'm glad to learn you're enjoying sourself so well. Mr Dunn's been here almost forever and I expect him to stay forever as well. regards, Hein McDunn - Clive has outlived your distant cousin 'Jock' Frazer - the Walmington-on-Sea undertaker by over 20 years. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
