charon 4,943 Posted December 5, 2018 Lol, just hearing how many sperm donations imported are from Denmark. That sock of yours Deathers would be worth a fortune after Brexit 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
YoungWillz 21,067 Posted December 17, 2018 So, in summary, from then 'til now: Tezza: Brexit Means Brexit. We're going to make a success of it. (Sub-text - I always wanted to be PM). Jezza: The people have spoken. We shall honour their wishes. (Sub-text - Unless the Parliamentary Party speaks and says it doesn't have confidence in me - then we go to a People's Vote). Tezza: My Brexit Secretary is doing a fine job negotiating Brexit. (Sub-text - My first Brexit Secretary is doing a crap job. I'm re-negotiating everything behind his back). Jezza: Any deal must meet our six tests, including having the same benefits as the UK has now. That is what the Government promised and we shall hold them to that. (Sub-text - Our six tests are fucking impossible to meet, Christ even we couldn't negotiate that deal. Mwahahahahaha). Tezza: I'm opposing Parliament having a meaningful vote on any deal. (Sub-text - I'm a control freak). Jezza: Parliament has voted for a meaningful vote on any deal. (Sub-text - we won a vote. Zoinks!) Tezza: I've held a meeting at Chequers and the Cabinet are fully agreed on the way forward. (Sub-text - My Lancaster House and Mansionhouse speeches were a pile of shit. I've come up with something equally ridiculous). Davva Davies: Fuck that. (Sub-text - Fuck that). Bojo: Wibble-wobble wiff waff pingu flounce. (Sub-text - Fuck that). "On the" Raaaaaab: I'm off to Brussels to negotiate the best deal for the country. (Sub-text - I'm new here. I have no idea how this works). Tezza: No you're not Dominic, I'm taking control. (Sub-text - I'M A CONTROL FREAK). Jezza: The deal the PM has brought back doesn't meet our six tests and we shall not be voting for it. (Sub-text - Told you it was fucking impossible. Didn't I say that?) "On the" Raaaaaab: Fuck this. (Sub-text - I just found out how this works. Fuck this). Tezza: I am withdrawing the motion on a meaningful vote after 3 full days of debate. I'm off to Brussels to get reassurances from our partners. (Sub-text - I'm not losing, I'm not losing, you're losing and I'M A FUCKING CONTROL FREAK). Jezza: This is disgraceful, But go to Brussels and see how you go. (Sub-text - She's losing. Why am I not winning? Oh, my name's Jeremy, that has never helped really...) 3rd Brexit Secretary: I'll stay in London. I wasn't doing anything before I got this job. (Sub-text - Wait, I don't have a cheery nickname, like Tezza, Jezza or BoJo? What's up with that?) Tezza: Well, I'm back from Brussels and they're listening. (Sub-text - I HAD A FUCKING ROW WITH JUNCKER, BLOODY FOREIGNERS IT'S BAD ENOUGH WE STILL HAVE THEM IN THIS COUNTRY. I THOUGHT SENDNG THE RACIST VANS OUT WOULD HAVE WORKED BY NOW!) Jezza: Vote Of No Confidence in you PM. (Sub-text - If her party won't vote for it, maybe Parliament will. Mind you, it's taken me so long, I've had to type the bloody thing out again!) Tezza: I'm not allowing time for your vote. (Sub-text - the only vote that matters is the People's Vote of 2016! That's the only reason I'm PM. And I have always wanted the job). Jezza: Looks like I'm going to have to table a VoNC in the Government. (Sub-text - Shit, shit shit!) Merry Christmas! 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Davey Jones' Locker 1,324 Posted December 18, 2018 Just a little reminder that we, the former colonies, don't want you to come to us expecting us to lick your arse when everything fall apart for you: http://theconversation.com/as-brexit-begins-australia-mustnt-get-caught-up-in-britains-post-imperial-fantasies-74918 https://www.theguardian.com/business/2018/mar/10/empire-strikes-back-why-former-colonies-dont-need-britain-after-brexit Have a nice day. 1 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Grim Up North 3,727 Posted December 18, 2018 18 minutes ago, Davey Jones' Locker said: Just a little reminder that we, the former colonies, don't want you to come to us expecting us to lick your arse when everything fall apart for you: http://theconversation.com/as-brexit-begins-australia-mustnt-get-caught-up-in-britains-post-imperial-fantasies-74918 https://www.theguardian.com/business/2018/mar/10/empire-strikes-back-why-former-colonies-dont-need-britain-after-brexit Have a nice day. Yeah I think when we joined the EU that caused a recession in New Zealand (I know Oz and NZ different countries ) so can't expect Australia and New Zealand to be falling over themselves to do trade deals with us. 1 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
paddyfool 379 Posted December 18, 2018 11 hours ago, Davey Jones' Locker said: Just a little reminder that we, the former colonies, don't want you to come to us expecting us to lick your arse when everything fall apart for you: http://theconversation.com/as-brexit-begins-australia-mustnt-get-caught-up-in-britains-post-imperial-fantasies-74918 https://www.theguardian.com/business/2018/mar/10/empire-strikes-back-why-former-colonies-dont-need-britain-after-brexit Have a nice day. One of the more annoying Brexit voters that I knew was an Australian living in the UK who reckoned there was a decent chance his own country could leverage a good trade deal out of it. He didn't even pretend to have the UK's own interests at heart. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Deathray 2,941 Posted December 18, 2018 Nick Boles and Anna Soubry saying they'd resign the Tory Whip and potentially vote with a Labour VoNC if No Deal became government policy; Soubry hinting many more Tories would join. https://news.sky.com/story/pm-warned-group-of-tory-mps-will-quit-party-if-government-chases-no-deal-brexit-11585260 Could Europe really kill the Tory party once and far all? 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lord Fellatio Nelson 6,219 Posted December 18, 2018 1 minute ago, Deathray said: Nick Boles and Anna Soubry saying they'd resign the Tory Whip and potentially vote with a Labour VoNC if No Deal became government policy; Soubry hinting many more Tories would join. https://news.sky.com/story/pm-warned-group-of-tory-mps-will-quit-party-if-government-chases-no-deal-brexit-11585260 Could Europe really kill the Tory party once and far all? Irrespective of this whole Brexit thing, Anna Soubry is a fucking hysterical harpy , cunt faced, wretched wank headed, pus filled cadaver of a bastard. That's just her good points. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Deathray 2,941 Posted December 18, 2018 Just now, Lord Fellatio Nelson said: Irrespective of this whole Brexit thing, Anna Soubry is a fucking hysterical harpy , cunt faced, wretched wank headed, pus filled cadaver of a bastard. That's just her good points. Anna Soubry's the good kind of Tory, the rare breed of Tory that actually has a few brain cells and a heart. Nigel Evans on the other hand is an absolute cunt of the highest order. Anyone else catch his performance in parliament this afternoon? Fuckwit. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lord Fellatio Nelson 6,219 Posted December 18, 2018 20 minutes ago, Deathray said: Anna Soubry's the good kind of Tory, the rare breed of Tory that actually has a few brain cells and a heart. Nigel Evans on the other hand is an absolute cunt of the highest order. Anyone else catch his performance in parliament this afternoon? Fuckwit. So that's two cunts then. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Deathray 2,941 Posted December 18, 2018 10 minutes ago, Lord Fellatio Nelson said: So that's two cunts then. I mean they regularly share a room with 640 other cunts to be fair. 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Sir Creep 7,070 Posted December 21, 2018 On 18/12/2018 at 14:58, charon said: ....and here I am, stuck with fucking AT&T 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
the_engineer 1,415 Posted December 22, 2018 Many of the young hipster students are turning on their anointed one corbyn.Because he won't give in and listen to their tantrums. Corbyn was pro brexit for 30 years. He is respecting the vote not only in the EU refrendum but in the 2017 election which 80% of the electorate voted for a brexit party. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Deathray 2,941 Posted December 22, 2018 41 minutes ago, the_engineer said: Many of the young hipster students are turning on their anointed one corbyn.Because he won't give in and listen to their tantrums. Corbyn was pro brexit for 30 years. He is respecting the vote not only in the EU refrendum but in the 2017 election which 80% of the electorate voted for a brexit party. I don't understand a lot of Corbyn supporters and I speak as one. He couldn't implement half his policies if we remain in the EU., Of course he's going to support Brexit. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Jeremy Corbyn 89 Posted December 22, 2018 The result of the referendum must be respected, however the Conservative Party are making a mess of it; the Labour Party will change this and get the best Brexit deal for the working people Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Davey Jones' Locker 1,324 Posted December 28, 2018 The rest of the world thinks you lot are idiots: https://www.theguardian.com/politics/2018/dec/28/bbc-radio-4-series-as-others-see-us-neil-macgregor-brexit-views Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Deathray 2,941 Posted December 28, 2018 33 minutes ago, Davey Jones' Locker said: The rest of the world thinks you lot are idiots: https://www.theguardian.com/politics/2018/dec/28/bbc-radio-4-series-as-others-see-us-neil-macgregor-brexit-views Fuck off you dirty foreigners. We don't want your views here... 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lord Fellatio Nelson 6,219 Posted December 28, 2018 7 minutes ago, Davey Jones' Locker said: The rest of the world thinks you lot are idiots: https://www.theguardian.com/politics/2018/dec/28/bbc-radio-4-series-as-others-see-us-neil-macgregor-brexit-views Hold on a mo. They have interviewed five 'well to do' members of FIVE countries that can all afford to be socialists, possibly. I don't have an issue with the notion that other countries think we are mad but your post about 'the rest of the world' think we are idiots is not exactly an accurate portrayal of the article, is it. You also went down the same kind of road by posting up all that bollocks about the former colonies assuming that we are going to go cap in hand to them to bale us out of the absolute crisis we will end up in. Tony Abbott and John Howard have been doing the talking about how the UK should embrace Brexit and we have had meetings with the Aussie Government about possible future trade deals. That's hardly us going cap in fucking hand is it!! Yeah, we get it, there is a lot of resentment at the notion that we still have colonies far and wide that we expect to give us a good rimming at will and the people want to rise up, say ''fuck you'' and go all independent and become republics and run their own shit without feeling like they are being kept in line blah de blah.... Fuck, that's just how millions of Brits feel! People will read into things what they want to and pick out the bits that suit their argument, we all do, the problem is that some of these articles are just a crock of shit. PS: The BBC are a bunch of cunts, as biased as fuck and run by libtards paid for by the masses. That one you couldn't make up. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Davey Jones' Locker 1,324 Posted December 29, 2018 7 hours ago, Lord Fellatio Nelson said: Hold on a mo. They have interviewed five 'well to do' members of FIVE countries that can all afford to be socialists, possibly. I don't have an issue with the notion that other countries think we are mad but your post about 'the rest of the world' think we are idiots is not exactly an accurate portrayal of the article, is it. You also went down the same kind of road by posting up all that bollocks about the former colonies assuming that we are going to go cap in hand to them to bale us out of the absolute crisis we will end up in. Tony Abbott and John Howard have been doing the talking about how the UK should embrace Brexit and we have had meetings with the Aussie Government about possible future trade deals. That's hardly us going cap in fucking hand is it!! Yeah, we get it, there is a lot of resentment at the notion that we still have colonies far and wide that we expect to give us a good rimming at will and the people want to rise up, say ''fuck you'' and go all independent and become republics and run their own shit without feeling like they are being kept in line blah de blah.... Fuck, that's just how millions of Brits feel! People will read into things what they want to and pick out the bits that suit their argument, we all do, the problem is that some of these articles are just a crock of shit. PS: The BBC are a bunch of cunts, as biased as fuck and run by libtards paid for by the masses. That one you couldn't make up. If Tony Abbot and John Howard are saying it is a good idea I would run like hell from it. Anyway, happy new year, LFN. :) 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
paddyfool 379 Posted January 1, 2019 There's a good bit of historical context for Brexit to be found in this piece by Dan Snow: https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2019/jan/01/brexit-britain-liaison-europe-history Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
charon 4,943 Posted January 10, 2019 Yip, called it. 4th Reich indeed. Germany and Vichy France to combine in lots of areas. Whose got Alsace these days any roads? https://www.thetimes.co.uk/article/france-and-germany-join-forces-as-a-single-superpower-fjf3bgv60 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Grim Up North 3,727 Posted January 10, 2019 7 hours ago, charon said: Yip, called it. 4th Reich indeed. Germany and Vichy France to combine in lots of areas. Whose got Alsace these days any roads? https://www.thetimes.co.uk/article/france-and-germany-join-forces-as-a-single-superpower-fjf3bgv60 French surrendering even quicker than they normally do. 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
YoungWillz 21,067 Posted January 14, 2019 Vote tomorrow. Gareth Johnson, Tory whip, has resigned his post to vote against the Government. Letters released from EU, showing no change to backstop and no change to Withdrawal Agreement. Tezza consistently said (and as recently as PMQs last week) it was her deal or no deal. Today, in Leave voting Stoke, she says it's her deal or no Brexit. Everyone keeps saying they are voting on a deal. There is no deal. Without an agreement on a trade arrangement, nothing is agreed. But that apparently won't stop the UK paying 39 billion to the EU, if Tezza and chums stay in power. Meantime, Hancock talking about air pollution (something the Tories have consistently ignored for 8 years) and there's the anchors on Universal Credit (something Tezza said would be rolled out regardless). Sounds like they are ready for an election, rather than anything else. Gawd help us all either way. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
msc 18,480 Posted January 14, 2019 1 minute ago, YoungWillz said: Letters released from EU, showing no change to backstop and no change to Withdrawal Agreement. Tezza consistently said (and as recently as PMQs last week) it was her deal or no deal. Today, in Leave voting Stoke, she says it's her deal or no Brexit. Keep her going. By tomorrow lunch time it'll be her deal or "£39 billion to every voter and see how they like being in the Labour top rate of tax..." 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
paddyfool 379 Posted January 14, 2019 You have to either laugh or tear your hair out. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites