Things To Do While Waiting For Death... 2006

[TLC 9]

I wouldn't be so sure about that.

 

 

Fatima - a real girl, probably.

I'd seriously consider downgrading that probably to a possibly if I were you.

 

The phrase 'rhinoceros in a wig' comes to mind.

 

And we used to give the Eastern Europeans stick about their manly-looking female Olympic field athletes, and this was at the same time our Fatima was competing. Either we were blinkered by our jingoism, or the East Germans etc. must have worn baggier shorts to hide their bulging packets.

[Lady_Fiona 0]

Bet nearly £400,000 that england will win the world cup.

 

http://www.allheadlinenews.com/articles/7004088537

 

i bet he is crying right now

[Lady Die 63]

Go to the Museum of Funeral Customs

[Lady Die 63]

Perform an autopsy

[maryportfuncity 10,298]

So Fatima Whitbread goes to the doctor and says; 'I've got this body hair problem.'

 

'Let's have a look,' he says.

 

She shows him some hairs at the top of her chest.

 

'How far do they go down?' he asks.

 

'All the way,' she says, 'right down to me bollocks.'

[maryportfuncity 10,298]

Oh aye, and try Babelsheep for a laugh. It'll take any text in English and translate it into broad Cumbrian.

[Lady Die 63]

Help this man

[Cowboy Ronnie 77]

Help this man

 

the girlfriend's parents must be so proud......

[maryportfuncity 10,298]

Damn good scam for collecting e-mail addresses and selling them to people who'll spam the mug punters into insensibility.

 

Was he any good as a cricketer?

[DevonDeathTrip 2,315]

Oh aye, and try Babelsheep for a laugh. It'll take any text in English and translate it into broad Cumbrian.

 

That's a smart barie site, like eh. A'm off ter find yan tha' translates in ter the Wes' Country dialec'.

[Captain Oates 21]

...another link on the trail of the stray apostrophe!

 

Do you come from Middlesborough?

 

(If not, here is all you need to know.)

[Lady_Fiona 0]

write about how crap your town is

 

http://www.idler.co.uk/crap/

 

someone doesdn't like ascot

[Star Crossed 33]

I didn't know where to put this but, those of you in the UK, please please PLEASE check out Sue Barker on the bbc Wimbledon coverage. I just switched on and burst out laughing; she's so brown and shrivelled she looks like E.T.! I swear, it's uncanny, she has actually morphed from human to alien.

This pic of her (that's her on the left) was taken a few years ago, long before the transformation was complete. Nobody's posted a recent picture of her, perhaps for fear of breaking the whole internet.

 

Incidentally, while looking for the pic above, I came across this chap, who clearly has an unhealthy obsession with the Extra Terrestrial.

[Magere Hein 1,398]

write about how crap your town is

 

http://www.idler.co.uk/crap/

 

someone doesdn't like ascot

Also have a look at the crap holidays section. Some of us may be interested in what happens when you're on holiday in Greece and your parents meet a couple from Hartlepool.

 

regards,

Hein

[Handrejka 1,871]

They've got my original home town spot on. I'm amazed Isle of Man hasn't made onto the crap holidays section though

 

http://idler.co.uk/crap/?page_id=139

[football_fan 41]

Buy the world's most expensive lemon

[Lady_Fiona 0]

take pictures of funny signs

 

http://www.funnysign.com/funnysign_088.htm

[Lady_Fiona 0]

watch dr who videos

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-lfTTO4Fly4

[Boudicca 702]

Wonder what this button does.

[Godot 149]

Wonder what this button does.

What does it do?

[Lady Grendel 139]

Wonder what this button does.

 

I'm getting red spots in front of my eyes after pressing this button, is there an end to it Bou? I gave up eventually

[TLC 9]

Wonder what this button does.

 

I'm getting red spots in front of my eyes after pressing this button, is there an end to it Bou? I gave up eventually

I'm ashamed to admit that I just found out that it does eventually loop, the emphasis being on eventually.....

[Slave to the Grave 22]

Wonder what this button does.

 

I'm getting red spots in front of my eyes after pressing this button, is there an end to it Bou? I gave up eventually

I'm ashamed to admit that I just found out that it does eventually loop, the emphasis being on eventually.....

 

I have to confess that I stopped quite quickly because I was scared that one of those horrible screaming faces would pop up suddenly and scare the life out of me.

[Handrejka 1,871]

Your Political Profile:

 

Overall: 25% Conservative, 75% Liberal

 

Social Issues: 25% Conservative, 75% Liberal

 

Personal Responsibility: 25% Conservative, 75% Liberal

 

Fiscal Issues: 25% Conservative, 75% Liberal

 

Ethics: 0% Conservative, 100% Liberal

 

Defense and Crime: 50% Conservative, 50% Liberal

 

How Liberal Or Conservative Are You?

 

http://www.blogthings.com/howliberalorcons...tiveareyouquiz/

[Magere Hein 1,398]

http://www.blogthings.com/howliberalorcons...tiveareyouquiz/

Your Political Profile:

 

Overall: 5% Conservative, 95% Liberal

Social Issues: 0% Conservative, 100% Liberal

Personal Responsibility: 0% Conservative, 100% Liberal

Fiscal Issues: 0% Conservative, 100% Liberal

Ethics: 0% Conservative, 100% Liberal

Defense and Crime: 25% Conservative, 75% Liberal

 

Hehe. Dutch liberals (who are social and economic conservatives with a slightly more progressive stance on ethics) would be surprised to learn I'm one of them.

 

regards,

Hein