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A Mugabe joke: A Robert Mugabe joke - Dead Pig Robert Mugabe and his chauffeur were rolling down the highway when suddenly they hit a pig crossing the road. They killed it instantly. Mugabe tells his driver: "Go to da farm over dere and hexplain to da honer of da pig what happen." One hour later, Robert sees his driver coming back from the farm, his clothes all wrinkled, a bottle of wine in one hand and a cigar in the other. "What happen to you?" Robert asks. "Well, the farmer gave me a bottle of wine, his wife, the cigar and their 19 year old daughter made wild passionate love to me." "My God! What did you tell dem?" asked Mugabe. The driver answered: "Good evening, I am Robert Mugabe's chauffeur and I have just killed the pig."

Is that better or worse than strong and stable?

I love you Joey but you should lighten up.

Why are you being so racist?

91 today

I've got 3 teams. I think that's your maximum.

Why do you always have to think of people in colours, is such a backward way to think, when I think of a actor, I look at their ability to act not what colour they are.

Call me a troll, anymore racial slurs?? You just pissed off because I got more fans than you.

Is it juvenile that I find this Mugabe bloke genuinely funny? That would look very bad out of context!

I would watch her if she didn't keep canceling concerts.

Michael Nyqvist. http://www.bbc.com/news/world-europe-40426177

Alright, I'm making a mid-new year's resolution... Don't feed the trolls, Don't feed the trolls, Don't feed the trolls, Don't feed the trolls, Don't feed the trolls...

Day Lewis is a great method actor. If I had a choice of who would play Mugabe in the farm biopic, it would be between Day Lewis, Downey Jnr and Danny Glover.

Can`t you and grace just pop over to see how he is?Would be useful.

My shadow list is burning your list up like an African Farm with cladding so shut the f..... up.

How about reading the first post in future

Oh another one I mustn't forget about. When do lists have to be in again please?

Brilliant one liner from Gary Delaney on Mock the Week this week...... I pulled a sickie the other day. Just one of the benefits of working in a hospital!

For your own sanity don't look it up in Google Images.

Masterlist: 1)Betty White b 17th January 1922 [95] 2)Harry Leslie Smith b25th February 1923 [94] 3)Gloria Vanderbilt b 20th February 1924 [93] 4)Zizi Jeanmaire b 29th April 1924 [93] 5)Charles Aznavour b 22nd May 1924 [93] 6)Eva Marie Sint b 4th July 1924 [92] 7)Joyce Randolph b 21st October 1924 [92] 8)William Russell b 19th November 1924 [92] 9)Cicely Tyson b 18th December 1924 [92] 10)Everton Weekes b 26th February 1925 [92] 11)Angela Lansbury b 16th October 1925 [91] 12)Bernard Hepton b 19th October 1925 [91] 13)Dick Van Dyke b 13th December 1925 [91] 14)Ingvar Kampard b 30th March 1926 [91] 15)Cloris Leachman b 30th April 1926 [91] 16)Mel Brooks b 28th June 1926 [91] 17)Harry Dean Stanton b 14th July 1926 [90] 18)Tony Bennett b 3rd August 1926 [90] 19) Janet Asimov b 6th August 1926 [90] 20)June Brown b 16th February 1927 [90] 21) Mirtha Legrand b 23rd February 1927 [90] 22)Harry Belafonte b 1st March 1927 [90] 23)Gina Lollobrigida b 4th July 1927 [89] 24)Neil Simon b 4th July 1927 [89] Shirley Hughes b 16th July 1927 [89] Rosalynn Carter b 18th August 1927 [89] Jeannette Charles b 15th October 1927 [89] Cleo Laine b 28th October 1927 [89] Denise Bryer b 5th January 1928 [89] Jeanne Moreau b 23rd January 1928 [89] Tempest Storm b 29th February 1928 [89] James Ivory b 7th June 1928 [89] C W McCall b 15th November 1928 [88] Noam Chomsky b 7th December 1928 [88] Philip Latham b 17th January 1929 [88] Patricia Routledge b 17th February 1929 [88] Max von Sydow b 10th April 1929 [88] Barbara Walters b 25th September 1929 [87] June Squibb b 6th November 1929 [87] Tippi Hedren b 19th January 1930 [87] Buzz Aldrin b 20th January 1930 [87] Rolf Harris b 30th March 1930 [87] Dolores Huerta b 10th April 1930 [87] Clint Eastwood b 31st May 1930 [87] George Soros b 12th August 1930 [86] Claire Bloom b 15th February 1931 [86] Rupert Murdoch b 11th March 1931 [86] Des O`Connoe b 12th January 1932 [85] Amanda Barrie b 14th September 1935 [81] Julie Andrews b 1st October 1935 [81] King Salmun of Saudi Arabia b 31st December 1935 [81] Here is the start of a master list which I will add to over the coming days (doing this on a work break) to include all names ages and dates of birth of picks along with a guide as to who picked them. Deaths: Roy Barraclough 12th July 1935_1st June 2017 [81] Adam West 19th September 1928_9th June 2017 [88] Barry Norman 21st August 1933_30th June 2017 [83]

Her inability to wear a seatbelt didn't end well for her.

They need to lock the Chuckle Brothers Matthew Corbett Richard Cadell and Neil Buchanan away.

Brian Cant sadly helps me back in the game. DL - 7 YW - 6. Edit: I now have as many hits as I did in the whole of last year.

Now now TF, don't feed the trolls please.