Room 101

[welshman 31]

My friend was stuck behind two fatties at McDonalds...two sisters...they were having an argument because one sister told the other that she would only buy her a whopper, not a double whopper, because she wanted them to lose weight...

 

He found that funny.

 

I wonder if they found it funny when they got to the front of the queue and were told that McDonald's doesn't sell Whoppers™?

 

Well then - Burger King, Wimpy or whichever chain the Whopper comes from...

Windy, that's no way to talk about your future employers

[welshman 31]

Room 101 - Alan Green

[Windsor 2,233]

My friend was stuck behind two fatties at McDonalds...two sisters...they were having an argument because one sister told the other that she would only buy her a whopper, not a double whopper, because she wanted them to lose weight...

 

He found that funny.

 

I wonder if they found it funny when they got to the front of the queue and were told that McDonald's doesn't sell Whoppers™?

 

Well then - Burger King, Wimpy or whichever chain the Whopper comes from...

Windy, that's no way to talk about your future employers

 

I should be so lucky...

[time 8,599]

proceed to eat the whole of the breakfasts, including, I assume, the cuttlery and plates. ^^^^ They then go back, a matter of a few hours later, and eat all of the lunch

 

You missed the bit where they fill up their bags with breakfast rolls to take away for a snack later on.

 

And the bit about having a glass of diet coke to help wash it all down.

 

I used to work with a guy (in fact he was my boss) who visited the vending machines three or four times a day Iin addition to lunch) to stock up on twinkies, ding-dongs, ho-hos and the like, and a diet coke.

 

His clothes fitted him so snugly he was known as the polyester tester.

[Memento Mori 12]

proceed to eat the whole of the breakfasts, including, I assume, the cuttlery and plates. ^^^^ They then go back, a matter of a few hours later, and eat all of the lunch

 

You missed the bit where they fill up their bags with breakfast rolls to take away for a snack later on.

 

And the bit about having a glass of diet coke to help wash it all down.

 

I used to work with a guy (in fact he was my boss) who visited the vending machines three or four times a day Iin addition to lunch) to stock up on twinkies, ding-dongs, ho-hos and the like, and a diet coke.

 

His clothes fitted him so snugly he was known as the polyester tester.

Speaking of food and eating habits - another thing that does my head in is somebody(usually a fattie) eating nosily and making those intermittent sounds of pleasure/satisfaction!

[Magere Hein 1,400]

Anal retentive moderation.

I agree.

 

This is bugging the shit out of me, dunno why, the forum isnt the centre of my universe.

There used to be a time when you could have a good old punch up on here and it wouldnt matter.

Ive had posts pulled recently and im trying to work out what parts of them were contentious, way, way over the top or downright libelous.

Part of the fun in coming on here was that i could leave my neck fully unwound and go and play.

No taboo subjects here, no hurt feelings, nobody gave a fuck and you could fill yer boots with whatever subject matter was on the menu.

Now? The place is a fucking disaster. Apart from the hardcore of stalwarts who are hanging on grimly, many have fucked off or now post once in a blue moon. Remember STTG? perhaps Boudicca? what about BS FFS!!!

As I understand it, one of the mods (name withheld to protect the innocent) removed some of your posts in an attempt to avoid escalation and put off other DL posters. I have, at this moment, no opinion on that, since I haven't read those posts. I probably never will; as I understand it they've gone the way of all bits.

 

The matter has my attention, as per my job description. I'll let you know the results.

 

No doubt, some kindly mod will either erase this post or move it, out of the goodness of their heart to the other side of the Forum and the thread "Is DL dying?" or summat.

Before anyone wants to stick their paws on it, re read the first three words of this post, then sod off and leave it alone.

As far as I'm concerned it stays here. Your complaint (if that's the word) is valid, whether those posts were deleted in accordance to the Unwritten Rules or not.

 

Compared to some other fora that I know, moderation here is pretty relaxed. More than 90% of the deleted posts are duplicates, quote only posts and, of course, spam. Otherwise, content is very rarely cause for removal. Posts that do not address the topic and which contain just insults and provocations often go, though. Again, I don't know if your posts were of that kind, so they may or may not have been deleted for a good reason.

 

There is no formal moderation policy, and I don't want one. I trust the mods' judgement and I don't check their work unless I have serious reasons to do so. I've done so only once, when I was made aware that a mod had turned to the Dark Side.

 

Unfortunately, you'll have to take my word for all this. I'm aware that you have no way of verifying what I write above.

 

Moderation won't go in Room 101, but it's good to discuss it every now and again.

 

regards,

Admin Hein

[Lord Fellatio Nelson 6,218]

Anal retentive moderation.

I agree.

 

This is bugging the shit out of me, dunno why, the forum isnt the centre of my universe.

There used to be a time when you could have a good old punch up on here and it wouldnt matter.

Ive had posts pulled recently and im trying to work out what parts of them were contentious, way, way over the top or downright libelous.

Part of the fun in coming on here was that i could leave my neck fully unwound and go and play.

No taboo subjects here, no hurt feelings, nobody gave a fuck and you could fill yer boots with whatever subject matter was on the menu.

Now? The place is a fucking disaster. Apart from the hardcore of stalwarts who are hanging on grimly, many have fucked off or now post once in a blue moon. Remember STTG? perhaps Boudicca? what about BS FFS!!!

As I understand it, one of the mods (name withheld to protect the innocent) removed some of your posts in an attempt to avoid escalation and put off other DL posters. I have, at this moment, no opinion on that, since I haven't read those posts. I probably never will; as I understand it they've gone the way of all bits.

 

The matter has my attention, as per my job description. I'll let you know the results.

 

No doubt, some kindly mod will either erase this post or move it, out of the goodness of their heart to the other side of the Forum and the thread "Is DL dying?" or summat.

Before anyone wants to stick their paws on it, re read the first three words of this post, then sod off and leave it alone.

As far as I'm concerned it stays here. Your complaint (if that's the word) is valid, whether those posts were deleted in accordance to the Unwritten Rules or not.

 

Compared to some other fora that I know, moderation here is pretty relaxed. More than 90% of the deleted posts are duplicates, quote only posts and, of course, spam. Otherwise, content is very rarely cause for removal. Posts that do not address the topic and which contain just insults and provocations often go, though. Again, I don't know if your posts were of that kind, so they may or may not have been deleted for a good reason.

 

There is no formal moderation policy, and I don't want one. I trust the mods' judgement and I don't check their work unless I have serious reasons to do so. I've done so only once, when I was made aware that a mod had turned to the Dark Side.

 

Unfortunately, you'll have to take my word for all this. I'm aware that you have no way of verifying what I write above.

 

Moderation won't go in Room 101, but it's good to discuss it every now and again.

 

regards,

Admin Hein

Fair play to you Hein, you didnt have to respond, nor should you have.

That could have been done by the delete happy mod.

Thanks

LFN

[Guest David]

People that blow their nose in a restaurant/cafe/eating establishment. I'm there to eat, not to listen to trying to empty the contents of your fucking nose into your hanky while I'm eating.

 

Ignorant bastards, fuck off into the toilet and blow your nose.

Yes, I do agree. I hate that. And people's mobile phones ringing when you're eating. That really annoys me

[Guest David]

Oh yeah, people who.. oh hang on.. just people actually..

The young tearaway who scratched my motorbike. I'll murder him.

[Magere Hein 1,400]

People that blow their nose in a restaurant/cafe/eating establishment. I'm there to eat, not to listen to trying to empty the contents of your fucking nose into your hanky while I'm eating.

 

Ignorant bastards, fuck off into the toilet and blow your nose.

Yes, I do agree. I hate that. And people's mobile phones ringing when you're eating. That really annoys me

I hate cell phones like few other things, but I have to admit that they have their use. People who talk to themselves in public used to be nuts. Thanks to mobile telephony they're hardly noticed.

 

regards,

Hein

[Guest David]

Could somebody please explain to me how, at 9.00am in the morning, a man could smell like a Wrestlers Jockstrap?

I had the misfortune to be standing behind a stinking wretch of a man in a Post Office queue that was, oh, 6 miles long.

There really is no excuse.

 

Maybe he'd just finished a night shift.

 

Maybe he had just been on a three hour early morning run.

 

Maybe he's just a smelly tramp claiming his benefits to go and buy 8 cans of Blackthorn for 4 quid in Tesco?

Last week, I got home from a night shift and, as I do every day, went out for a seven - mile run near my flat. Because I hadn't had a shave and I was in my Celtic shirt a policeman thought I was a soccer hooligan and took me to the police station. I hate injustice.

[Lord Fellatio Nelson 6,218]

Could somebody please explain to me how, at 9.00am in the morning, a man could smell like a Wrestlers Jockstrap?

I had the misfortune to be standing behind a stinking wretch of a man in a Post Office queue that was, oh, 6 miles long.

There really is no excuse.

 

Maybe he'd just finished a night shift.

 

Maybe he had just been on a three hour early morning run.

 

Maybe he's just a smelly tramp claiming his benefits to go and buy 8 cans of Blackthorn for 4 quid in Tesco?

Last week, I got home from a night shift and, as I do every day, went out for a seven - mile run near my flat. Because I hadn't had a shave and I was in my Celtic shirt a policeman thought I was a soccer hooligan and took me to the police station. I hate injustice.

Serves you right for being a Celtic supporter.

Should have had the shit kicked out of you.

[Handrejka 1,903]

Foot fetishists, creepy fuckers.

[Godot 149]

Foot fetishists, creepy fuckers.

 

I'll say.

[Lord Fellatio Nelson 6,218]

Foot fetishists, creepy fuckers.

 

I'll say.

So was it the Donkey Jacket that got him to pull da birds or was it the fact that he was married to a lesbian feminist that made him seek fanny elsewhere?

[Lard Bazaar 3,799]

Foot fetishists, creepy fuckers.

 

I'll say.

So was it the Donkey Jacket that got him to pull da birds or was it the fact that he was married to a lesbian feminist that made him seek fanny elsewhere?

 

Those ladies remind me of the ladies on Harry Enfield 'women, know your limits' - oh Mr Grayson, look at the fluffy kittens!

[Memento Mori 12]

I wish I could banish my f**king insomnia to Room 101 right now

[Windsor 2,233]

I saw a Santa Clause in a shop window today.

[honez 79]

I saw a Santa Clause in a shop window today.

Next to Asterix and small Prince?

[DevonDeathTrip 2,358]

The Apprentice 2010. What a bunch of wankers and bitches. I really don't think the world would end up a worse place if all the contestants were rounded up and dropped in to the sea, several miles from shore. It was such a depressing viewing experience that I switched over to Police Camera Action.

[Memento Mori 12]

The Apprentice 2010. What a bunch of wankers and bitches. I really don't think the world would end up a worse place if all the contestants were rounded up and dropped in to the sea, several miles from shore. It was such a depressing viewing experience that I switched over to Police Camera Action.

I couldn't agree more. Like so many other reality programmes, The Apprentice is beginning to lose its edge.

[Godot 149]

Car parks. Well not any car park, but the one near my train station. I parked the car yesterday but didn't have any change as my arsehole offspring kids had emptied the change box kept in the car solely for car parks. The council had helpfully taped over the slot for a credit card but said there was a service allowing you to phone in your payment. Shit, it was only for £2.20 for two hours. It was 5pm, nobody was going to come round from the council. It was 99 per cent safe to leave the car without paying. But that little 1 per cent niggled me ("this will be the time," it said) so I called the number to comply with the system. It wanted the number plate, make of car and colour of car all recorded on a voice recognition system, then it wanted the designated number of the car park, my credit card number, expiry date and the little number on the back all to be keyed in. By this time I had lost the will to live and missed umpteen trains. Then to cap it all it said that on top of the £2.20 I would be charged a 40p "convenience fee".

 

So I called in the shop over the road. I wish!

[welshman 31]

all of these muscle idiots wish he was dead

[Guest David]

Could somebody please explain to me how, at 9.00am in the morning, a man could smell like a Wrestlers Jockstrap?

I had the misfortune to be standing behind a stinking wretch of a man in a Post Office queue that was, oh, 6 miles long.

There really is no excuse.

 

Maybe he'd just finished a night shift.

 

Maybe he had just been on a three hour early morning run.

 

Maybe he's just a smelly tramp claiming his benefits to go and buy 8 cans of Blackthorn for 4 quid in Tesco?

Last week, I got home from a night shift and, as I do every day, went out for a seven - mile run near my flat. Because I hadn't had a shave and I was in my Celtic shirt - even though I live in Newcastle - a policeman thought I was a soccer hooligan and took me to the police station. I hate injustice.

Serves you right for being a Celtic supporter.

Should have had the shit kicked out of you.

Surely being a Celtic fan's not a sin. I'd like to put Sunderland supporters in Room 101 (sorry Black Cats fans - but I support Newcastle - as I live there.)

[Lard Bazaar 3,799]

Fucking plumbers. They can all go and fuck themselves. You would think that in these financially embarrassing times that people would be grateful that you want to pay them for their skills. Instead, they either take fucking weeks to bother to answer your messages asking them to come and quote, or they take fucking weeks to send you the quote, or once they've sent you the quote, it's for a ridiculously large amount of money. Well they can all go and stick it up their arse, I'm going to learn to fit my own fucking shower and tile my own bastard bathroom. Bollocks to the lot of them!