Jump to content
Lord Fellatio Nelson

DL Status Updates: Statements, Obsevations & Verbal Tennis

Recommended Posts

I was going to start a peasants uprising against the elitist 'Admins and Mods only thread' with a new thread.

Then I realised I'd just be Wat Tyler and look what happened to him, besides they'd just lock the thread. 

 

So I brought my pitchfork to wave angrily here instead. :rant:

 

:D

  • Haha 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
2 hours ago, En Passant said:

I was going to start a peasants uprising against the elitist 'Admins and Mods only thread' with a new thread.

Then I realised I'd just be Wat Tyler and look what happened to him, besides they'd just lock the thread. 

 

So I brought my pitchfork to wave angrily here instead. :rant:

 

:D

I've just reopened it! Too good an opportunity to miss really.

  • Haha 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
5 hours ago, Joey Russ said:

So I didn’t go to my school prom this year because of having a rough week. Instead, I decided to listen to some of the vinyl records that I own personally. Could’ve posted in the thread I recently created, but thought this thread would be more apt. Anyways, here are the awesome vinyl records I listened to yesterday: 

0CA1D33E-EC0D-4C1E-8770-A1C3229DC64A.jpeg

3F3839B0-CC56-4FF4-AF8A-6FA0EDCA4590.jpeg

7613D42A-DC68-4346-8663-9C98E8FE5846.jpeg

5849D657-DE43-4EC4-96AF-D0745D67B4D7.jpeg

69378F27-BD11-40DA-A147-A0F4992B84BC.jpeg

FFCD3C7D-3B58-49C4-8508-5F69EBDE9DEB.jpeg

F6928550-88F3-4FAB-9C7E-1CB27FA12650.jpeg

45A28C66-F4F1-492E-A9A5-26E0835DCE27.jpeg

 Lamb Lies Down - The Genesis album that die hard Genesis fans only reluctantly admit to owning let alone actually playing.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Had the day off school today, so I went to finally get my driver's license. Technically, I was able to have it since I turned 16 in July, but I didn't get back from Poland till August, then school got in the way, yada yada...

 

It was a 3 hour wait at the DMV, which surprised me because it was an early afternoon on a Monday. But I guess I should have expected that since Chicagoland is filled with unemployed ratchets, so it makes no difference when you go.

 

I spent the past couple days reading driver exam horror stories online, and I was convinced my examiner would hallucinate imaginary children running across the street and fail me for running them over (yes, that actually happened to someone, apparently). But he was a nice guy. I was pretty nervous since I didn't know the area well (it was half an hour away from my house), but all I had to do is drive around the neighborhood for 5 minutes, 'uphill' (obvs. no hills in Illinois) park - he didn't even make me use the parking brake, and back out of a driveway - which I took nearly a minute on cuz I was tryna be extra cautious.

 

Anyway, I'm ecstatic as fuck now and can't wait to enjoy my newfound freedom! :D 

  • Like 2
  • Haha 1
  • Confused 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

 

And then you headed to Nashville for a late waffle?

  • Haha 4

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Under-30 motorists. I'm a 21-year-old white male and I drive a Focus RS. In the eyes of Essex Police, this fatal car/demographic combination clearly means I'm a drug dealer. And an insurance fraud. And a car thief, serial speed offender, drink driver, stabbist, you name it, I'm it. Because this morning at just gone 6am was the fourth time this year I've been pulled over by a cop, for no apparent fucking reason. I mean granted, I do have 3 points on my licence, and yes, most drivers of that car are older than me, and sure, it isn't exactly an inconspicuous car as it is. But Jesus river dancing Christ I'm getting bored of it now. Does anyone else have a problem with their local pigs not having their fucking priorities right?

  • Haha 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
5 minutes ago, The Quim Reaper said:

Under-30 motorists. I'm a 21-year-old white male and I drive a Focus RS. In the eyes of Essex Police, this fatal car/demographic combination clearly means I'm a drug dealer. And an insurance fraud. And a car thief, serial speed offender, drink driver, stabbist, you name it, I'm it. Because this morning at just gone 6am was the fourth time this year I've been pulled over by a cop, for no apparent fucking reason. I mean granted, I do have 3 points on my licence, and yes, most drivers of that car are older than me, and sure, it isn't exactly an inconspicuous car as it is. But Jesus river dancing Christ I'm getting bored of it now. Does anyone else have a problem with their local pigs not having their fucking priorities right?

You think things have changed?

Essex Police used to pull up a lad I knew, back in the day, so often that he and his signature were like returning friends to Basildon nick when he appeared with yet another 5 day wonder.

Mind you, he was a fucking twat.

Look at it another way. If some spotty faced utter c**t decided to take your car in the early hrs of the morning, while you are asleep and go and rag the arse off it, you may appreciate him getting collared by the old bill before they get that chance.

Better still, junk the car. It's a Ford FFS!

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, Lord Fellatio Nelson said:

You think things have changed?

Essex Police used to pull up a lad I knew, back in the day, so often that he and his signature were like returning friends to Basildon nick when he appeared with yet another 5 day wonder.

Mind you, he was a fucking twat.

Look at it another way. If some spotty faced utter c**t decided to take your car in the early hrs of the morning, while you are asleep and go and rag the arse off it, you may appreciate him getting collared by the old bill before they get that chance.

Better still, junk the car. It's a Ford FFS!

 

 

True, but it’s just fucking irritating that the knee-jerk assumption is that, because the car’s quick/not cheap, it’s fucking nicked, and because I’m not 47, I nicked it. Wouldn’t mind if I were in Tilbury but it’s Stock!

 

Anyway, junk?? Get to fuck! Goes like a scalded cock (when not in the company of the pigs, apart from that 3-points incident) so it’s staying for now, until kids arrive and I become a sullen, sunken-faced nuclear dad with a Mondeo, or I get a ban, whichever comes sooner

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
9 hours ago, The Quim Reaper said:

 

True, but it’s just fucking irritating that the knee-jerk assumption is that, because the car’s quick/not cheap, it’s fucking nicked, and because I’m not 47, I nicked it. Wouldn’t mind if I were in Tilbury but it’s Stock!

 

Anyway, junk?? Get to fuck! Goes like a scalded cock (when not in the company of the pigs, apart from that 3-points incident) so it’s staying for now, until kids arrive and I become a sullen, sunken-faced nuclear dad with a Mondeo, or I get a ban, whichever comes sooner

Get a Scenic.

  • Haha 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
8 minutes ago, Lard Bazaar said:

Get a Scenic.

 

I'm not that posh.

  • Haha 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I've not had points on license since 1998.

 

Then again, my license is still the original one from the early 80's, paper, in bits, been through washing machine a few times and not readable.

 

Every pull I get ( happens to older people as well) they give me Telt for it, chargeable offense etc, but don't bother as too much paperwork for the cunts.

 

 

* fair enough, the pulls/ cherges I get are justified.

 

But the cunts can't make them stick.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
2 hours ago, charon said:

I've not had points on license since 1998.

 

Then again, my license is still the original one from the early 80's, paper, in bits, been through washing machine a few times and not readable.

 

Every pull I get ( happens to older people as well) they give me Telt for it, chargeable offense etc, but don't bother as too much paperwork for the cunts.

 

 

* fair enough, the pulls/ cherges I get are justified.

 

But the cunts can't make them stick.

Legend :bow:   :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On 4/28/2018 at 18:26, The Quim Reaper said:

 

True, but it’s just fucking irritating that the knee-jerk assumption is that, because the car’s quick/not cheap, it’s fucking nicked, and because I’m not 47, I nicked it. Wouldn’t mind if I were in Tilbury but it’s Stock!

 

Anyway, junk?? Get to fuck! Goes like a scalded cock (when not in the company of the pigs, apart from that 3-points incident) so it’s staying for now, until kids arrive and I become a sullen, sunken-faced nuclear dad with a Mondeo, or I get a ban, whichever comes sooner

 

Despite it being a Focus, there is no reason to become a sullen dad just because you have kids. Mine rode in style. And they rode quickly. We always had a sedan of some sort, but our primary transportation? Ha! Life's too damn short.

 

Before I had to become boring in the name of regular commutes across the United States, this was my last performance car:

 

GTO.jpeg.764aedcfb1665a29b39f75c209aaaac9.jpeg

 

The one before that:

 

cobra.jpg.4863d0b15adeabdf5180d13d3b576403.jpg

 

A Cobra is the only Ford I will own. :P Or a Shelby GT500. 

 

Well, I would be more likely to take a Challenger SRT Hellcat, which you can give me in my dreams and with a large, open track on which you can all eat my dust:

 

300651_2018_Dodge_Challenger.thumb.jpg.eb72a0196615726700d826b1258ed5de.jpg

 

And I just paid another speeding ticket. :lol:  Who wants a ride through Texas in - and with - a Hellcat? 

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On 29/04/2018 at 01:26, The Quim Reaper said:

 

True, but it’s just fucking irritating that the knee-jerk assumption is that, because the car’s quick/not cheap, it’s fucking nicked, and because I’m not 47, I nicked it. Wouldn’t mind if I were in Tilbury but it’s Stock!

 

Anyway, junk?? Get to fuck! Goes like a scalded cock (when not in the company of the pigs, apart from that 3-points incident) so it’s staying for now, until kids arrive and I become a sullen, sunken-faced nuclear dad with a Mondeo, or I get a ban, whichever comes sooner

My best man is quite short but he always drove performance cars and kept getting pulled over cos he looked like he was 14

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
7 hours ago, CarolAnn said:

 

Despite it being a Focus, there is no reason to become a sullen dad just because you have kids. Mine rode in style. And they rode quickly. We always had a sedan of some sort, but our primary transportation? Ha! Life's too damn short.

 

Before I had to become boring in the name of regular commutes across the United States, this was my last performance car:

 

GTO.jpeg.764aedcfb1665a29b39f75c209aaaac9.jpeg

 

The one before that:

 

cobra.jpg.4863d0b15adeabdf5180d13d3b576403.jpg

 

A Cobra is the only Ford I will own. :P Or a Shelby GT500. 

 

Well, I would be more likely to take a Challenger SRT Hellcat, which you can give me in my dreams and with a large, open track on which you can all eat my dust:

 

300651_2018_Dodge_Challenger.thumb.jpg.eb72a0196615726700d826b1258ed5de.jpg

 

And I just paid another speeding ticket. :lol:  Who wants a ride through Texas in - and with - a Hellcat? 

You rock!:D

  • Haha 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I hate, I mean I HATE fucking ebay.

However, at times, it is the only place to get things, where all else has failed.

Unfortunately, as is the reason why I hate it, you have to deal with the odd monumental C**T!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Someone advertises a part that is supposed to be for my car, I buy it.

I get it and, fucking hell, it does not fit. 

I message the seller and with two pics, demonstrating that it cannot possibly fit my car, and he agrees that I should return it.

This I do by recorded delivery and it is another 6 days before i politely ( yeah, I can be) message him to ask him, in so many words, 'Where the fuck is my refund you wanker?

He replies that it will be processed that afternoon.

That was yesterday.

Today I see it is pending on Paypal. Minus £10 that was the cost of postage.

I message him, I inform him it's not just £10 short but its another £13 short, the sum it cost me to send it registered.

He messages me to say sorry and that my costs for postage would not be met because it states on the ad that the buyer is responsible for returns.:lol:

I have replied.

  • Haha 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Go git him lfn.

  • Haha 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I had a similar experience when buying a petrol cap for my lawnmower. 

The cap arrived, and although it was exactly as shown, right size, it did not fit because the thread was not the same.

I contacted the seller* and never heard another word.  Even though I returned the item.  Nada.

Complained to Ebay, and they refunded me without any drama.

 

*lawnmowersparesukltd 

https://www.ebay.co.uk/usr/lawnmowersparesukltd

 

I had much better luck with garden-hire-spares who were most cooperative.

https://www.ebay.co.uk/usr/garden-hire-spares

 

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
3 minutes ago, Toast said:

I had a similar experience when buying a petrol cap for my lawnmower. 

The cap arrived, and although it was exactly as shown, same size, it did not fit because the thread was not the same.

I contacted the seller and never heard another word.  Even though I returned the item.  Nada.

Complained to Ebay, and they refunded me without any drama.

 

Yes, ebay have refunded me before, over the head of the seller.

If I had ordered it incorrectly, didn't want it etc and the seller had graciously accepted a return then, fine, I should pay for the postage.

This cock head wrongly advertises the part then expects me to swallow the cost of sending it back because he fucked up.

No way.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I was quite the ebayer (a word?) from say 1998 - 2006.  Even went by Sircreep.  I prolly did a good 250 transactions, generally as a buyer but sold some shit too.  I doubt if I had more than 3-4 incidents at all, and half of those were postal rather than the seller (e.g. my neighbour saw the FedEx guy throw a large box of china onto my porch cuz my dog barked at him in bay window).  Perhaps I was lucky in my dealing with sellers.  I barely sign on to my account anymore, 2-3 times a year.  Sir Creep used to say 'eBay is the safest stock to buy, it's impossible for anything to surpass it in the online auction dept, they have a forever monopoly'.  While that remains true, who knew it would be a totally FREE website -- Craigslist -- which would be eBay's downfall.  Why should I wait a week for someone to ship something when I can go to seller's house and get the oriental rug - cutlery - lawnmower as soon as they say come over and get it?  
My whole life is shopped like this, even big ticket items.  Found my vehicles all in Quick Quarter (local newspaper of ads, like Craigslist in print form), even found my HOUSE in there.  Bought a car off eBay once.  Buy lots of crap on Craigslist (bedroom set, kayak, etc).  Like furniture, who the fuck pays $$ for new dining room set when 30 of them are available on CL, and some are antiques no less in good shape?  Only a fish-eyed fool, that's who.
SC

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Dear media: It's not an E.coli OUTBREAK if ONE PERSON dies.  

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On 5/3/2018 at 06:24, Sir Creep said:

Dear media: It's not an E.coli OUTBREAK if ONE PERSON dies.  

If 121 people are infected, that's an outbreak (or OUTBREAK if you prefer), regardless of how many die.

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
3 hours ago, time said:

If 121 people are infected, that's an outbreak (or OUTBREAK if you prefer), regardless of how many die.

If no one dies it must have been a real pussy of a virus, not the thing we attach 'outbreak' to (unless you  are the US media and lots of people have the sniffles -- granted we name winter storms now like hurricanes).

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, Sir Creep said:

If no one dies it must have been a real pussy of a virus, not the thing we attach 'outbreak' to (unless you  are the US media and lots of people have the sniffles -- granted we name winter storms now like hurricanes).

 

You'd have loved 2014 - one of our forum members (I forget who) was predicting ebola would spread world wide and have a million/billion cases within 6 months. As you can tell from the streets full of ebola victims in Breaux Bridge, this prediction was completely 100% accurate.

 

:D

 

When folk were panicked about ebola that summer, I tried to calm them down by pointing out how there's various strands of bubonic plague (ie Black Death) around the world still, something like a dozen cases per year in the US (on average, iirc), and some are drug resistant, and no one's died en masse yet. For some reason, it didn't stop the panic...:P

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    No registered users viewing this page.

×

Important Information

Your use of this forum is subject to our Terms of Use