The Great Cornholio 902 Posted January 24, 2020 Here's mine: Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Sir Creep 7,070 Posted January 27, 2020 While waiting for death you can borrow your neighbour's saw for a wee project around the house. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Sir Creep 7,070 Posted February 4, 2020 Pluck a tyre off a 13-ft (4m) croc's head. 1 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ladyfiona 2,580 Posted February 19, 2020 Play violin while having brain surgery. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Sir Creep 7,070 Posted February 21, 2020 On 19/02/2020 at 09:40, ladyfiona said: Play violin while having brain surgery. Key of B-Flatline Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ladyfiona 2,580 Posted February 22, 2020 Goat Yoga anyone? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Sir Creep 7,070 Posted March 4, 2020 Go see what the postman has brought you today. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
QTips 24 Posted March 10, 2020 Perhaps this thread should temporarily be renamed, Things To Be Doing Whilst in Self Isolation! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ladyfiona 2,580 Posted March 12, 2020 Could attend Cheltenham and then get the virus a week later. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ladyfiona 2,580 Posted March 27, 2020 PARKOUR!!!!!! 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bentrovato 1,087 Posted March 27, 2020 Is masturbation normal? https://www.nhs.uk/common-health-questions/sexual-health/is-masturbation-normal/ Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ladyfiona 2,580 Posted April 3, 2020 If anyone wants to spend hours on Ocado trying to get a food order, then go on before 1pm as the site seems to give a notice about being in maintenence. It's how I got a slot for tomorrow morning at 8am. I then spent 5+ hours trying to edit the order due to the site crashing. However my parents now owe me £120. Yes I did do this at work when nothing was going on in the hospital outpatients. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
The Great Cornholio 902 Posted May 14, 2020 So just a random question. Who hates online shopping? I always feel really angsty getting something online as I like to check the item directly before I buy. Like I know whatever food I order will probably be maybe the smallest one in the batch or maybe whatever I'm given wont have a good sell-by date. Plus I just have an overall uneasy feeling when it comes to paying for something and getting it 3 days later. Cant wait to go out shopping again without risking killing mum. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Toast 16,137 Posted May 14, 2020 Yeah, I ordered some tomato grow bags a few days ago on click-and-collect, and still haven't had the email to tell me they're ready to be picked up, even though they were in stock. But the garden centre reopened yesterday! So I could have just gone there and bought them already. I daresay they were too busy getting ready to open to the public to bother about orders. Not a big deal as I don't need them urgently, but I've paid for them and am being kept waiting. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Paul Bearer 6,101 Posted May 14, 2020 3 hours ago, Toast said: Yeah, I ordered some tomato grow bags a few days ago on click-and-collect, and still haven't had the email to tell me they're ready to be picked up, even though they were in stock. But the garden centre reopened yesterday! So I could have just gone there and bought them already. I daresay they were too busy getting ready to open to the public to bother about orders. Not a big deal as I don't need them urgently, but I've paid for them and am being kept waiting. B&Q? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Toast 16,137 Posted May 14, 2020 3 hours ago, Paul Bearer said: B&Q? No, local garden centre. But they rang this afternoon and I've collected them now. I did (reluctantly) order some compost from B&Q a few weeks back and several days went by without them contacting me, despite the promise that it would be ready next day. In the meantime I was delighted to discover that a local family business had compost available, so I cancelled anyway and went there. It's a small nursery that is also a greengrocer and florist, and only the food shop was open. However the compost is kept in the car park, so they were still selling it. It was infinitely better stuff than the crap sold by B&Q, as expected. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
time 8,599 Posted May 14, 2020 10 hours ago, Kenny McCormick said: So just a random question. Who hates online shopping? I always feel really angsty getting something online as I like to check the item directly before I buy. Like I know whatever food I order will probably be maybe the smallest one in the batch or maybe whatever I'm given wont have a good sell-by date. Plus I just have an overall uneasy feeling when it comes to paying for something and getting it 3 days later. Cant wait to go out shopping again without risking killing mum. I used Tesco home delivery a couple of times a few years ago when I had an arm in a sling post-op, but not since. The only problems I had were my own fault for not reading product descriptions properly (barbecue sauce on pizza? ) Since the lockdown began I'm getting all my beer home-delivered. I may never go out again! 3 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ladyfiona 2,580 Posted May 25, 2020 Idea if you want to feel suicidal. Go shopping in Primark in UK on 15th June. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Paul Bearer 6,101 Posted May 25, 2020 25 minutes ago, ladyfiona said: Idea if you want to feel suicidal. Go shopping in Primark in UK on 15th June. Don't you mean in England? 1 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bluejay 8 Posted June 25, 2020 Eat a kebab. I've always said I'd rather be terminally ill or dead before I try one. Having said that, I'm not knocking anyone who does like them. I'm probably going to get beaned upside the head with a bat with 40 rusty nails. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
runebomme 377 Posted June 25, 2020 a typical kebab has about 2000 calories that's your daily allowance in one meal Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lard Bazaar 3,799 Posted June 26, 2020 Barbecue sauce on pizza and kebabs are the fucking tits man, there is something wrong with you lot. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TQR 14,389 Posted June 26, 2020 53 minutes ago, Lard Bazaar said: Barbecue sauce on pizza and kebabs are the fucking tits man, there is something wrong with you lot. There’s a positive correlation between how ‘the tits’ they are and how high one’s blood-alcohol content is. So for the most part, couldn’t fucking agree more 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
CoffinLodger 1,248 Posted July 3, 2020 As a matter of interest doe anyone here ever pray for anyone to die ? Celebrities I mean. If so do you pray to God or the devil ? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lard Bazaar 3,799 Posted July 3, 2020 9 minutes ago, CoffinLodger said: As a matter of interest doe anyone here ever pray for anyone to die ? Celebrities I mean. If so do you pray to God or the devil ? I don’t pray, but I’ll laugh my cock off when someone finally puts a hole between Trump’s eyes. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
