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The dead of 2016

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Some of you may appreciate the Popbitch 2016 RIP sepcial below;

 

>> 2016: RIP <<
Grim reapings we bring

Congratulations! If you're
reading this, then you made
it through 2016: an absolute
banner year for death and
destruction.

We aren't in the business of
being overly sentimental here
at Popbitch, but – given all
that's happened – we thought
we'd see the year out with
a few tributes to those we
have lost.

We'll be back in 2017.

Hopefully.

pb x

-----------------------------------
RIP David Gest. Someone who worked
with David told us that his head
"smelled of dry-cleaning fluid".
-----------------------------------

>> Alan Rickman: RIP <<
The cold hand(job) of Death

Back in the day, Mick Jagger
was having a fling with a
society beauty. One night they
were out at a dinner party but
she felt Jagger was not paying
her the attention she deserved.

Deciding she'd try to provoke
his interest, she deliberately
turned away and only talked to
the person on her other side.
Still she got no response.

There was, she felt, only one
thing for it. So she reached
behind her back and started
to give him a surreptitious
handjob. This time, his
interest definitely swelled.

Feeling pleased with herself,
the socialite turned back round.
Sitting in that seat was another
man. Bored with being ignored,
Jagger had changed places. She
discovered she'd actually been
wanking off Alan Rickman.

-----------------------------------
RIP: Colonel Abrams. Whose real
name was... Colonel Abrams.
-----------------------------------

>> Jimmy Young: RIP <<
The DJ's hearing aides

Late into his career at Radio 2,
Jimmy Young had become quite
deaf from years of working in
the music industry. Most people
knew, but not everyone. One
junior member of the show's
team got a little frustrated
with the old DJ one day and,
in the safety of the soundproofed
control room, told his colleagues
what he thought of Young.

Suddenly the studio talkback
burst into life with the words
"I am not a fucking cunt".

Jimmy Young was an expert lip
reader. The junior left his
job the same day.

>> David Bowie: RIP <<
It's all greek to us

He had a dozen different and
distinctive looks, but David
Bowie knew how to avoid being
recognised if he ever fancied
a bit of privacy.

When he wanted to walk around
a big city without detection,
he would simply tuck a Greek
language newspaper under his
arm as he went about – so that
anyone who stopped to say hello
would see it and second guess
themselves, thinking they'd
maybe just seen a Greek man
who looked a lot like Bowie.

------------------------------------
RIP Pete Burns, writer of the single
greatest sign-off we ever received
on a legal threat: "Worst wishes,
you cunts. Pete Burns"
------------------------------------

>> Howard Marks: RIP <<
Celebrity toilet tales

At an old Stereophonics party,
Stuart Cable was stopped by a
bouncer from using one of the
cubicles because the toilet's
flush was bust.

Stuart shouted out that he used
to be a plumber, so rolled up
his sleeves, got down on the
floor and fiddled about in the
cistern until it was fixed. His
only problem was a wooden part
that he couldn't fit back on.

Enter drug legend (and former
carpenter) Howard Marks – who
promptly sorted the wood out,
leaving the toilet in perfect
working order.

>> Paul Daniels: RIP <<
The King of Hearts

Paul Daniels was surprisingly
popular in the entertainment
industry. One producer recalls
a time when Daniels was booked
for a 240-seat theatre show
at short notice, without much
promotion. Only 11 people
turned up.

Rather than flounce off in a
huff, he and Debbie delivered
a full two-hour show for the
tiny audience – and then he
donated the entire fee to a
local charity, plus a little
bit extra to cover the cost
of holding the event.

------------------------------------
If you fancy a slightly racier Paul
Daniels story, we've got one of
those for you too. Read it here:
http://bit.ly/1Vfh0zo
------------------------------------

>> Terry Wogan: RIP <<
Hair today, gone tomorrow

King of Sweden writes:
"A friend's mother used to work
with Terry Wogan at a bank before
he became famous. His hair was
thinning in those days and she
was surprised to see him later
on TV with a full head of hair.
Turns out he had several hair-
pieces of varying length to
give the impression that it
was his own hair at different
stages of natural growth."

FYI: The only piece of gossip we
got on Wogan that was even slightly
contentious is that the ladies in
his village didn't care for how he
cut the queue at the local butcher
at Xmas when picking up his turkey.

------------------------------------
RIP: Keith Emerson and Greg Lake.
Now Jim Davidson's favourite band
is just "Palmer".
------------------------------------

>> Prince: RIP <<
Little man, big appetite

One of the things to emerge
in among the many heartfelt
tributes proffered to Prince
this year was that the Purple
One had a voracious appetite
for popcorn.

One reader told us about the
time they attended a daytime
screening of a movie in LA,
where Prince and Prince's
bodyguard were the only other
people in the theatre.

About fifteen minutes into
the film, they heard a noise
that sounded like "a pack of
wolverines tearing into a
binbag". But it wasn't. It
was Prince, absolutely going
to town on an extra large
bucket of buttered popcorn.

An ex-manager of the Chanhassen
Cinema in Prince's hometown
backed the story up, fondly
remembering how Prince would
often buy three buckets of
popcorn for every movie that
he went to see there; and
Ingrid Chavez (a frequent
collaborator with Prince)
also reminisced about how
he had taught her to mix bags
of peanut M&Ms in with her
buckets of popcorn.

------------------------------------
RIP: Prince's protege, Vanity (aka
Denise Matthews). Her stage name was
originally going to be Vagina; her
band was going to be The Hookers.
------------------------------------

>> Victoria Wood: RIP <<
A Vicky situation

For all her woman-of-the-people,
salt-of-the-earth appeal,
Victoria Wood was not without
her diva-ish side.

She was once booked to perform
for a big event run by the
Evening Standard at a hotel in
Harrogate, but she walked into
the ballroom, took one look at
the grand piano and said "No, I'm
not playing that" before turning
on her heel and walking out.

One helper, armed with the
Yellow Pages, managed to find
a replacement piano which
matched Vic's specifications –
and it was owned by a couple
who lived out in the Moors.

After much hairpulling and
pleading, they managed to
convince this couple to loan
the hotel their piano for the
evening, had it loaded into
a van and brought into the
venue for Ms Wood's approval.

She re-entered the ballroom,
took one look at the new piano,
said "Now the stool doesn't
match!" and walked out again.


>> Alexis Arquette: RIP <<
Parental guidance

Alexis Arquette remembers the
time, before her transition,
when she broke the news to
her father that she was gay.

His words of encouragement?
"If it helps, son, I had to
suck a lot of cock to get
my first break too."

------------------------------------
RIP Maurice White. John Le Mesurier
off of Dad's Army was a massive fan
of Earth, Wind and Fire.
------------------------------------

>> Mustafa Koc: RIP <<
Memories of Koc Holdings

It wasn't just celebrities who
died in 2016. A longstanding
Popbitch favourite – Turkish
businessman, Mustafa Koc –
also passed on.

We followed the developments
of his business (Koc Holdings)
keenly. Especially when Koc
partnered with a software
company in Azerbaijan by the
name of Giz – creating the
company Giz Koc Holdings.

Koc Holdings also had a
fabulously titled subsidiary
company: Arcelik.

------------------------------------
RIP Kenny Baker: C3PO actor Anthony
Daniels refused to dress completely
until Kenny was inside R2D2. Or, in
his words: "The face doesn't go on
until the dwarf is in the can."
------------------------------------

>> Zsa Zsa Gabor: RIP <<
The Prince and the poppers

Of the nine husbands Zsa Zsa
Gabor had, the most fun was
her last one: "Prince" Frederic
von Anhalt. Fred was actually
called Hans, but he persuaded
the dotty old Princess Marie-
August of Anhalt to adopt him
in his 30s, before changing his
name to the more royal-sounding
Frederic, and his surname to
Prinz von Anhalt (which could
more easily be mistaken for
"Prince" von Anhalt...)

In 2007 he claimed to be the
father of Anna Nicole Smith's
baby, but as he was also suing
the makers of SPAM at the
same time, people didn't take
his claim too seriously.

That, and the fact that most
days he could be found outside
Starbucks, West Hollywood, in
his Rolls Royce Silver Shadow,
waving at the buff boys coming
out of the Boystown gyms.


------------------------------------
RIP Prince Buster. The ska pioneer
converted to Islam after meeting
Muhammad Ali in New York in 1964.
He claimed this derailed his career.
------------------------------------

>> Craig Gill: RIP <<
Keeping up the Smiths

We reported earlier this year
that Craig Gill, the drummer
from The Inspiral Carpets, gave
musical bus tours of Manchester.
His Morrissey and the Smiths
tour in particular was extremely
well-attended – probably due in
no small part to this joke that
Craig would tell on the trail:

"What does Morrissey have in
his sandwiches?

"I don't know, but Marr might!"

------------------------------------
RIP Ronnie Corbett – Old Jokes Home:
Kings Cross Station Announcer "Would
the gentleman who has lost a case of
whisky come to the Lost Property
office, where the gentleman who
found it has been handed in."
------------------------------------

Old Jokes Home:
Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Lemmy.
Lemmy who?

Ah, how soon we forget...

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Liz Smith has gone this evening

Yes sad to say......Another Christmas special where Nana Royal bid farewell.

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Liz Smith has gone this evening

Passed away Christmas Eve.

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A yoga instructor and actress who vanished on her way to Christmas Day dinner with friends in Washington DC has been found dead in her car, police said. Tricia McCauley's (46) body was found inside her missing white Scion one day after police released a photograph of a man who may have been driving it. A suspect has been taken into custody.

 

If she owned a late 1930s Hudson, the headline could have read: "Step-Up actress found dead in her step down"

I'll get me coat.

 

SC

http://www.usmagazine.com/celebrity-news/news/actress-tricia-mccauley-found-dead-in-her-car-w457858

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15726644_1210204792388527_78025263393895

 

 

 

Couple of days early, but I'm senile and would forget.

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15740891_10155095810819749_4725276507591

 

Took the words right out of my mouth...

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Not been as bad/good as other years according to this highly scientific analysis. You pays your money and you gets your obits!

celebrity-deaths.jpg

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Carrie Fischer died yesterday.

 

May the Force be with her...

 

carrie-fisher-net-worth2.jpg

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Carrie Fischer died yesterday.

 

May the Force be with her...

 

carrie-fisher-net-worth2.jpg

Thought long and hard about your first post did we?

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Carrie Fishers mother Debbie Reynolds may be reunited with her sooner than she thought.She's been rushed to hospital after suffering a stroke ...http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-38455653

She's not dead and this was posted hours ago elsewhere. A wronger thread you could not have chosen.

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Carrie Fishers mother Debbie Reynolds may be reunited with her sooner than she thought.She's been rushed to hospital after suffering a stroke ...http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-38455653

She's not dead and this was posted hours ago elsewhere. A wronger thread you could not have chosen.

 

I wish you had been right but sadly she did die http://www.bbc.com/news/entertainment-arts-38455777 .Anyway, I thought I'd better post an engish language obit for Hans Tietmeyer http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-38453905

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Carrie Fishers mother Debbie Reynolds may be reunited with her sooner than she thought.She's been rushed to hospital after suffering a stroke ...http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-38455653

She's not dead and this was posted hours ago elsewhere. A wronger thread you could not have chosen.

 

It's not wronger but righter.

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Carrie Fishers mother Debbie Reynolds may be reunited with her sooner than she thought.She's been rushed to hospital after suffering a stroke ...http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-38455653

She's not dead and this was posted hours ago elsewhere. A wronger thread you could not have chosen.

 

It's not wronger but righter.

 

Only now she's deader.

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Keion Carpenter

 

Significant in that the unveiling of the Deathrace Masterlist will reveal he was sitting on two teams

 

But the subs benches of said teams are gonna be raided after this post: http://www.baltimoresun.com/sports/nfl/bal-keion-carpenter-former-woodlawn-high-nfl-player-dies-at-39-20161229-story.html

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He died back in June and it was posted on DL at the time...

Whoopsy!

 

:/ Yeah, I found that out, afterwards. :/ But the link says it was today that he died. :P My bad, sorry. After I posted this, I was thinking to myself, didn't he die, earlier this year?

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He died back in June and it was posted on DL at the time...

 

In fact he did not say when...

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