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Completely misread that as "all trains" ie Thomas, Percy, the Flying Scotsman, Ivor and so on...

Never saw the bollocks

Released from hospital after a three month stay. https://www.republicworld.com/entertainment-news/hollywood-news/f-dot-ri-dot-en-dot-ds-actor-matthew-perry-is-finally-home-after-being-hospitalised-for-three-months

Oh I assure you all my jokes are nicked from others. Like this one, about an old guy who died. 99 years old, lived a health freak existence on orders of his wife, she's made him a vegan teetotaller exercise guy etc etc, anyhow they're killed in the same car crash. So they're up at Heaven together and St Peter meets them and gives them the low down on the afterlife, walking about, pointing out stuff. "Pubs over there!" "You've got pubs in heaven?" said the guy, surprised. His wife by his side. "OH aye", said St Peter, "All kinds of pubs, all the booze you can think of. It's Heaven, so you can drink all you want if you want with not even a hangover. You can live however you want." They walk by a MacDonalds. "You've got fast food up here?" said the guy. "Oh aye" said St Peter, "Any type you want, it's Heaven, you can eat anything you want up here." They pass by a brothel. St Peter nods. "Any type you want, it's Heaven after all." The tour ends. St Peter says "Anything to say?" Guy turns to his wife. "You cunt, I could have been here 70 years ago!" It's got the structure of a Mike Reid gag, but dunno, heard it off a drunk guy in the QMU years ago.

Waking up to the news that she's bankrupt / entering an IVA is fantastic news to me. Only one thing would please me more - her death. A spiteful vindictive bitch if ever there was one. Karma biting you hard on your arse yet? Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha. Anyone agree?

Clay Riddell, the billionaire co-owner of the NHL's Calgary Flames, has died. He was 81. Riddell is the second person to own/co-own or have owned/co-owned the franchise to die this year. Former owner Sonia Scurfield passed away in June. https://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/calgary/clay-riddell-passed-away-flames-owner-1.4825932

Discharged.

No need for the word “more” here as this other Chris isn’t famous AT ALL!!

Clearly says Richard Bland mate. Too bad so sad. Clerical errors go against the participant.

Looks like he's left the all-you-can-eat buffet pretty vacant.

It's his new Public Image...

Julie Burchill once asked me where the Quavers were in a branch of Tesco Express.

89 Today!!!

Panic over. Lady Coleridge, the nurse and adventurer who explored the Congo river with Colonel John Blashford-Snell. He pays tribute. Jalaluddin Haqqani, the Afghan warlord who was backed by the CIA to fight the Soviets but sided with the Taliban after the civil war. Jacqueline Pearce, the actor best known for playing villains in "Blake's Seven" and "Dr Who". Lord Thomas, the Chief Executive who introduced ethical banking at the Co-op. And Stan Brock , the cowboy and pilot who provided free health care to thousands in the USA.

I think Weld would prefer Monday...ba-dum-tssh....I'll leave now.

Yes. In an ever so slightly calmer fashion.

Think I'm on the list now, having deflated my lungs trying to read this as one sentence.

Onto the DeathList with her!

Someone seems to have removed all the punctuation keys from your keyboard...

How is this thing still alive?

Very recent pics of our two favourite Vietnamese zombies.

The thin white powdery lines?

Chris Cornell has stage 4 cancer.