Spade_Cooley 9,474 Posted January 5, 2022 Thank you very much tiny sexy rat lookalike and notorious Hollywood asshole Anna Kendrick. Yep, cup season is back on the Deathlist and I'm going to be stumbling through the process as gamesmaster this year following Roey J. stepping down. A series of 100m sprints compared to the DDP's marathon, the Deathlist Cup has been won by all the greats: deadsox, DDT, An Fear Beag, gcreptile, and your boy Spade Cooley. Will we be engraving a new name on the trophy this year? Or will someone finally become the first two-time winner? Anyway, let us copy/paste Joey's rules from last year: The Deathlist Cup 1. This is a knockout tournament featuring one-on-one matchups between Deathlist forum posters. These matches will be determined by use of a random draw, using Random.org. 2. Unless we happen to end up with 2/4/8/16/32/64 entrants, then certain competitors will get byes to the Second Round. This will be based on results from the 2021 Cup: ie, winners first. 3. Players, on receiving their randomly drawn opponent, will have a ten day period to send the Referee their First Eleven for the match by PM, and one sub in case of an early death. These eleven picks can be very low hanging fruit if you so wish, as the point of the game is to score as many “goals” during the month a match is played. ie, a perfect team would look like this 1. Adam Ant (joker) 2. Bob Backlund 3. Chelsea Clinton 4. Didier Drogba 5. Erika Eleniak 6. Frank Field 7. Green Gartside 8. Harry Hill 9. Ivan Ives (Russian rapper) 10. Joe Jackson 11. Kevin Keegan subs 12. Lennox Lewis 13. Meghan McCain 14. Nick Colte Would probably back Frank Field as a joker over Adam Ant though. 4. Banned picks – We're slightly more lenient than the DDP, but we're still banning Famous For Being Ill, people on Death Row (unless they die naturally), anyone who is a prisoner of a terrorist organisation, animals, the under 18s, and anyone who is "missing in action" but blatantly already dead. 5. Famous For Being Ill picks are those who have no notoriety outside of their cancer/other illness. If they played two matches for a Conference North team or they were mayor of a city in Kiribati back in the 90s, that's fine. If they're Joe Bloggs who is in a coma after refusing a covid vaccine or a Brave Parent Celebrating Their Last Christmas, they're not getting accepted. 6. If in doubt, submit a pick, but the decision of the ref (me) is final and is not open to any court of appeal. If you think it’s a dodgy pick, it probably is. 7. Each match will take place over the course of a single month. For example, a February match would take place from February 1st to February 28th (or 29th on a leap year), a March match from March 1st to March 31st and so on... 8. Games will be scored in the following manner: A person in your team dies = 3 points A unique person in your team dies = 1 more point (ie 1 bonus point) Fatality – Your joker. Double points 9. Here is what happens in the case of a team member dying prematurely (ie on 28th Feb for the March game). If you discover this before the 3rd of the month, your top sub will automatically go into place. If it is discovered on the 3rd or after, sorry about your luck. If it turns out the person was dead and known to be (this is determined via a reference in a newspaper or magazine, not social media) then subs don’t come into play. This will upset at least one player a year. Will it lead to a huffy forum stormout in 2022? Let's see. 10. At the end of the month, the player in the match with the highest score wins that game, and will advance to the next round. The player who doesn’t have the highest score will lose, and be eliminated. 11. In the event of a draw, the following tiebreaks will be used: 1st tiebreak = number of hits 2nd tiebreak = average age of hits 3rd tiebreak = a coin toss 12. A player is only held to one team for a single match. If they win their match and advance to the next round, they may pick eleven entirely different people for the next round. In this way, folk who announce their terminal illness in, say, May, can be put to good dead pooling use. 13. Qualifying obits? Every single English-language newspaper, magazine or significant website in the universe. Also Le Monde, Le Figaro, Der Spiegel, Die Zeit, El Pais, El Mundo and because I'm running it this year we're adding Corriere Della Sera. If they still can't get a QO from that, then they really weren't famous. 14. For the removal of any doubt, any players who do not send in their team before the deadline will be DQ'd and replaced by the highest scoring loser. No matter how many sad PMs you send afterwards. This draw takes place in Month 1 (ie January) and is for matches taking place in Month 2 (February). After the draw, each player sends me (via PM) a team of eleven celebrities (and some subs hopefully) they think will snuff it in Month 2. Good luck and sign up to take part in this thread. Entries close on January 21 with the draw to take place immediately after. 7 4 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Spade_Cooley 9,474 Posted January 5, 2022 Confirmed entrants theoldlady Joey Russ msc gcreptile YorkshireBanker Gooseberry Crumble Banana Book Bibliogryphon YoungWillz DevonDeathTrip Grim Up North CaptainChorizo HDS Salmon Mousse MortalCaso Pop_Zeus CalebH maryportfuncity TQR JoeMoneypenny Predictor The Old Crem Bentrovato Annami grobler Great Uncle Bulgaria deadsox ThereWillBeDeaths7 Sean the_engineer alt obits guy Captain Hemlock Perhaps LizLemon DeathByArsenic John Key An Fear Beag Sir Cunto Pedro67 Sideik GuyFromFuture wannamaker Wormfarmer Masterffull Hell BabyBlue MariNisia Famous6Eva SpadeCooley Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
theoldlady 2,280 Posted January 5, 2022 I would like to play. Thank you for doing this. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Joey Russ 7,210 Posted January 5, 2022 Obviously I’m coming back to play. Gonna try (and probably fail) to pull an OoO. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
msc 18,397 Posted January 5, 2022 9 minutes ago, Joey Russ said: Obviously I’m coming back to play. Gonna try (and probably fail) to pull an OoO. Well, at the very least I'm sure he'll be flattered! Splendid to see someone taking care of the Cup, Spade. Naturally, I'll join in. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
gcreptile 10,939 Posted January 5, 2022 I will try to defend my title, with an even less impressive performance of jumping just as high as I need to. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
YorkshireBanker 168 Posted January 5, 2022 I would like to play. Thank's for doing this. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Gooseberry Crumble 5,328 Posted January 5, 2022 Count me in please! My sphincter is ready to loosen and have impact! 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bibliogryphon 9,509 Posted January 5, 2022 I am always up for this humiliation 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Joey Russ 7,210 Posted January 5, 2022 11 minutes ago, Bibliogryphon said: I am always up for this humiliation Don’t be too hard on yourself. You got your first hit in the cup last year. You never know, could translate into a win this time… 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
DevonDeathTrip 2,357 Posted January 5, 2022 I really don't have the time for this these days....but count me in anyway 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
CaptainChorizo 1,969 Posted January 5, 2022 Signing Up Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
HDS 234 Posted January 6, 2022 I suppose I’ll help round out the field. In. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Salmon Mousse 473 Posted January 6, 2022 Would like in, please Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
MortalCaso 1,618 Posted January 6, 2022 I'm going to try it. First time 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted January 6, 2022 I’m up for it, first time in this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
CalebH 42 Posted January 6, 2022 Count me again for 2022 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
maryportfuncity 10,616 Posted January 6, 2022 Aye, I'll give this one another go if there's still space Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
msc 18,397 Posted January 6, 2022 11 hours ago, Bibliogryphon said: I am always up for this humiliation Years ago there was a chap who won the French Open by going 2 sets down in every game and winning, to the point the joke was he'd go two down and then say "Aha, now I have you where I want you!". Not convinced Biblio isn't gearing up for a similar run in the Cup one of these years. 4 minutes ago, maryportfuncity said: Aye, I'll give this one another go if there's still space Only 19 in the now (by a quick count), long way off the record of 48-ish (off memory, I didn't go and look before pedants arrive). 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TQR 14,352 Posted January 6, 2022 Fucking legend for keeping this alive, Spade! I’m in, and I promise to be bang average again. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
