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Bloody Fireworks!

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How many countries in the world, apart from good old Blighty, build bonfires at this time of the year? Do the Scots and Welsh build bonfires on November 5? Do the Aussies and New Zealanders. Do they celebrate Papal demise in New England? What about the Indians? I suppose they throw the wife in.

 

The Manx do, which is odd as they're normally so sodding parochial about "not being part of the UK and having their own parliament etc "

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We used to have bonfires here but not now.

The official ones were cancelled due to insurance and health and safety (I think) and the non official ones were put out by the fire brigade (killjoys).

So no-one bothers anymore.

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How many countries in the world, apart from good old Blighty, build bonfires at this time of the year? Do the Scots and Welsh build bonfires on November 5? Do the Aussies and New Zealanders. Do they celebrate Papal demise in New England? What about the Indians? I suppose they throw the wife in.

 

Around here, universities with huge engineering schools have bonfires, and those collapse and kill 12 people so the university president says they can't do it anymore so instead they go out into the forest and have one there.

 

That's what you can tell your parents a university education does for you.

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How many countries in the world, apart from good old Blighty, build bonfires at this time of the year? Do the Scots and Welsh build bonfires on November 5? Do the Aussies and New Zealanders. Do they celebrate Papal demise in New England? What about the Indians? I suppose they throw the wife in.

 

Around here, universities with huge engineering schools have bonfires, and those collapse and kill 12 people so the university president says they can't do it anymore so instead they go out into the forest and have one there.

 

That's what you can tell your parents a university education does for you.

Sounds brilliant. Who do they stick on top?

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We used to have bonfires here but not now.

The official ones were cancelled due to insurance and health and safety (I think) and the non official ones were put out by the fire brigade (killjoys).

So no-one bothers anymore.

They should have cancelled the one in Bilston

 

Man killed by bonfire explosion in Bilston

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I'd support the night if all the words of the original song were still used :rolleyes:

 

 

Remember remember the fifth of November,

Gunpowder, Treason and Plot,

I see no reason why gunpowder and treason

should ever be forgot.

 

Guy Fawkes, Guy Fawkes, 'twas his intent

to blow up the King and the Parliament.

Three score barrels of powder below,

Poor old England to overthrow:

By God's providence he was catch'd

With a dark lantern and burning match.

 

Holloa boys, holloa boys, make the bells ring.

Holloa boys, holloa boys, God save the King!

Hip hip hoorah!

 

 

A penny loaf to feed the Pope.

A farthing o' cheese to choke him.

A pint of beer to rinse it down.

A faggot of sticks to burn him.

Burn him in a tub of tar.

Burn him like a blazing star.

Burn his body from his head.

Then we'll say ol' Pope is dead.

 

Hip hip hoorah!

Hip hip hoorah!

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I'd support the night if all the words of the original song were still used :rolleyes:

 

 

Remember remember the fifth of November,

Gunpowder, Treason and Plot,

I see no reason why gunpowder and treason

should ever be forgot.

 

Guy Fawkes, Guy Fawkes, 'twas his intent

to blow up the King and the Parliament.

Three score barrels of powder below,

Poor old England to overthrow:

By God's providence he was catch'd

With a dark lantern and burning match.

 

Holloa boys, holloa boys, make the bells ring.

Holloa boys, holloa boys, God save the King!

Hip hip hoorah!

 

 

A penny loaf to feed the Pope.

A farthing o' cheese to choke him.

A pint of beer to rinse it down.

A faggot of sticks to burn him.

Burn him in a tub of tar.

Burn him like a blazing star.

Burn his body from his head.

Then we'll say ol' Pope is dead.

 

Hip hip hoorah!

Hip hip hoorah!

That verse probably qualifies as a religious hate crime these days.

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I'd support the night if all the words of the original song were still used :rolleyes:

 

 

Remember remember the fifth of November,

Gunpowder, Treason and Plot,

I see no reason why gunpowder and treason

should ever be forgot.

 

Guy Fawkes, Guy Fawkes, 'twas his intent

to blow up the King and the Parliament.

Three score barrels of powder below,

Poor old England to overthrow:

By God's providence he was catch'd

With a dark lantern and burning match.

 

Holloa boys, holloa boys, make the bells ring.

Holloa boys, holloa boys, God save the King!

Hip hip hoorah!

 

 

A penny loaf to feed the Pope.

A farthing o' cheese to choke him.

A pint of beer to rinse it down.

A faggot of sticks to burn him.

Burn him in a tub of tar.

Burn him like a blazing star.

Burn his body from his head.

Then we'll say ol' Pope is dead.

 

Hip hip hoorah!

Hip hip hoorah!

That verse probably qualifies as a religious hate crime these days.

 

Not in Lewes. Had you been there last night you would have seen them burn the Pope as they do every year.

They have never got over the 17 protestant martyrs burnt at the stake in Lewes High street in 1555 (before they had an M&S).

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Speaking of which, the following is a little used verse of 'God Save The Queen':

 

 

Lord grant that Marshal Wade

May by thy mighty aid

Victory bring.

May he sedition hush,

And like a torrent rush,

Rebellious Scots to crush.

God save the Queen!

 

 

Dr Hack, or any other Scots poster, may want to comment.

 

Re fireworks; who needs 'em when we've got ranters?

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Slight tangent, but what about the rarely-used last verse of All Things Bright and Beautiful?

 

The rich man in his castle,

The poor man at his gate,

God made them high or lowly

And ordered their estate.

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A particular favourite with Karl Marx wasn't it?

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How many countries in the world, apart from good old Blighty, build bonfires at this time of the year? Do the Scots and Welsh build bonfires on November 5? Do the Aussies and New Zealanders. Do they celebrate Papal demise in New England? What about the Indians? I suppose they throw the wife in.

 

 

We get them on Halloween, as I think 3 anti Catholic bonfires per year would be pushing it a bit! :rolleyes:

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A man suffered internal burns when he tried to launch a rocket from his bottom on Bonfire Night.

 

Paramedics found the 22-year-old bleeding and with Black Cat Thunderbolt Rocket lodged inside him when they attended the scene in Sunderland.

 

He suffered a scorched colon and is now recovering in hospital, where his condition is described as stable.

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A man suffered internal burns when he tried to launch a rocket from his bottom on Bonfire Night.

 

Paramedics found the 22-year-old bleeding and with Black Cat Thunderbolt Rocket lodged inside him when they attended the scene in Sunderland.

 

He suffered a scorched colon and is now recovering in hospital, where his condition is described as stable.

 

 

Stable but with a very sore arse! :P

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This year I decided to take my dog away to my parents for a few days to avoid the damn things, there's normally a display in our local park which is 1/4 of a mile away, the weekend before 5th. But on driving out of my town on Friday I saw an advert for this years display, it's on the night I bring him home, after the 5th, bastards :lol: .

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Having landed back in the UK yesterday and somewhat hacked off to have missed Saturday's Deathcon, and Carlisle's demolition of Leeds I got some consolation with a ticket to Carlisle away at Luton Town. A game so bloody unexciting that the highspot for me was the attempt by some local chavs to land fireworks on the pitch. Game stopped, bright green explosions in the exective terrace outside the executive boxes. I'm guessing it'll appear on You Tube soon.

 

Game ended 0-0 in case anyone's interested.

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I don't mind Bonfire Night, it's Bonfire Week that's starting to annoy me. Following on from Diwali, that's a lot of fireworks.

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Sorry to say the Germans have it right. They celibate New Year with a bang. BUT (in Teutonic style) you are only permitted to light fire works from noon New Year's Eve until noon New Year's Day. Apart from that they go mad.

 

Was in Berlin for the Millennium and it was wild. Oh look an English car, chuck a banger ! What a party we had (once we dumped the car).

 

Razor

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Sorry to say the Germans have it right. They celibate New Year with a bang.

 

Are you talking about the Pope?

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A man suffered internal burns when he tried to launch a rocket from his bottom on Bonfire Night.

 

Paramedics found the 22-year-old bleeding and with Black Cat Thunderbolt Rocket lodged inside him when they attended the scene in Sunderland.

 

He suffered a scorched colon and is now recovering in hospital, where his condition is described as stable.

 

Sounds as though he could have been an entry in the "Darwin Awards"!!!

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A man suffered internal burns when he tried to launch a rocket from his bottom on Bonfire Night.

 

Paramedics found the 22-year-old bleeding and with Black Cat Thunderbolt Rocket lodged inside him when they attended the scene in Sunderland.

 

He suffered a scorched colon and is now recovering in hospital, where his condition is described as stable.

 

Sounds as though he could have been an entry in the "Darwin Awards"!!!

 

With that and the vicar with his potato, the hilarity of latent homosexuality knows no bounds...

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I think there have been less fireworks here tonight than for the previous three weeks. I don't get it.

The pissing rain probably helped, along with the recession.

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I think there have been less fireworks here tonight than for the previous three weeks. I don't get it.

 

It's been the quietest Bonfire night I can ever recall. Ten years ago it was like fucking Dresden, but now...?

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I always think fireworks sound like somebody having a poo.

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