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Lord Fellatio Nelson

DL Status Updates: Statements, Obsevations & Verbal Tennis

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8 hours ago, TQR said:

Don McLean thought 3rd Feb 1959 was the day the music died. Tragic though the plane crash that killed Buddy Holly, Richie Valens and Big Bopper was, this simply can't be the case; the majority of good music was made after that date. But whilst sorting through the UK 00s charts for a future KoS game, I stumbled across the actual day the music died, after realising a very sudden and as yet irrecoverable dearth of talent at a certain point.

 

Guys, music died on 30th May 2007. It wasn't an air disaster that did it, no, it was much worse: it was the day Lee Mead off of a short lived Andrew Lloyd Webber "talent show" got to number 2 with Any Dream Will Do, dressed up in Joseph's fucking technicolour coat. Since that exact point, music has been comparably wank. It's Lloyd Webber's fault.

 

There was a tour of Jospeh a few years ago with the runners up from the competition taking the lead role and in an attempt to drag in punters they invited local dance schools to participate in the venues so their families would come to see them. My niece was in one such show so as a dutiful uncle I went along. 

 

It was a most disturbing spectacle because through repetition and refrain the audience are worked up to a point where they believe they are enjoying themselves. However once I had seen through the musical trick I felt really uncomfortable watching everyone else around me

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On 03/12/2023 at 00:55, TQR said:

This cold/flu thing doing the rounds that I’ve managed to pick up has, since Wednesday, gradually gone from bad, via horrid, hellish and fucking nasty, to its current state of utterly unbearable.

 

Update: Viral chest infection. The echinacea, drugs, manuka honey, sympathy from my OH (very, very minimal) and TQMa's delivery of a vat of chicken noodle soup are finally beginning to work so hopefully it'll not be pissing me off for much longer.

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I am 10,000 days old today.

 

I reckon birthdays shouldn’t be celebrated. I reckon age milestones like this should be instead. Maybe a celebration every 1,000 days. Or 5,000. 

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4 minutes ago, TQR said:

I am 10,000 days old today.

 

I reckon birthdays shouldn’t be celebrated. I reckon age milestones like this should be instead. Maybe a celebration every 1,000 days. Or 5,000. 

 

Not everyone who lives to 36000 days lives to see 36500 days.

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1 hour ago, TQR said:

I am 10,000 days old today.

 

I reckon birthdays shouldn’t be celebrated. I reckon age milestones like this should be instead. Maybe a celebration every 1,000 days. Or 5,000. 

 

Interesting. I have just over a month to go before an impressive milestone.

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1 hour ago, TQR said:

I am 10,000 days old today.

 

I reckon birthdays shouldn’t be celebrated. I reckon age milestones like this should be instead. Maybe a celebration every 1,000 days. Or 5,000. 

You only a few months younger than me then. 

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59 minutes ago, Toast said:

Interesting. I have just over a month to go before an impressive milestone.

 

12,000, right? ;)

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I’m sure this has been mentioned before elsewhere but this site is now painfully slow, pretty much all the time. Posts and edits take around 10 seconds to process. Navigating around the place results in much hair-pulling.
 

Both my 5G/WiFi are sound and I’ve no issues elsewhere, just here. Recently, the site seldom seems to have has fewer than 250 people browsing at a time, Christ knows why, but it appears to be grinding it down something chronic.

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23 minutes ago, TQR said:

I’m sure this has been mentioned before elsewhere but this site is now painfully slow, pretty much all the time. Posts and edits take around 10 seconds to process. Navigating around the place results in much hair-pulling.
 

Both my 5G/WiFi are sound and I’ve no issues elsewhere, just here. Recently, the site seldom seems to have has fewer than 250 people browsing at a time, Christ knows why, but it appears to be grinding it down something chronic.

Same. It’s been very slow for a couple of months now. Today is one of the slowest it’s been outside of  times where a big death occurs - it’s taken me forever to get through the unread list. I dread to think how it will cope during the busy periods during the next couple of weeks. 

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The guests could possibly be many instances of a mis-configured search engine's bot indexing the site.

 

Board software like this usually detects bots and handles them appropriately, often by comparing them with a list of known bots. However, occasionally they're not detected, and are treated as multiple active guest user sessions instead - but it's usually an easy task to add a new bot to the list and have it automatically detected.

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I disabled guest access as a temporary emergency measure. Alas I believe the server itself is entirely a Grim Reaper matter. Will look into it further.

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4 minutes ago, Death Impends said:

I disabled guest access as a temporary emergency measure. Alas I believe the server itself is entirely a Grim Reaper matter. Will look into it further.


Thanks DI. It’s certainly a *bit* quicker now but not back to normal, definitely worth giving @Grim Reaper a prod.

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It is saying 485:guests at the moment which is a lot at anytime let alone with guests access turned off. 

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The guest count will be the number of active sessions currently in the session table, which will start to drop shortly when the sessions begin to expire. Guest will still be logged, but won't be able to get beyond the main screen so should go away.

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It deeply disturbs me that all the rants about Ruth Langsford's mother have been search-indexed.

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9 minutes ago, polar duck said:

It deeply disturbs me that all the rants about Ruth Langsford's mother have been search-indexed.

Just did a quick search to see how quickly it would turn up and to my surprise found that our friend @Deathrow66 seems to have posted the exact same statements elsewhere.

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Despite 542 guests the site is running pretty fast at the moment. 

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22 minutes ago, The Old Crem said:

Despite 542 guests the site is running pretty fast at the moment. 

 

Agreed - much improved compared to 4pm this afternoon where it was still dragging an anchor

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Right gang, an update.

 

Contact was reached with Grim Reaper and the server was upgraded. Guest viewing has now been reenabled so we shall play it by ear and see if that was all that's needed.

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1 hour ago, Death Impends said:

Right gang, an update.

 

Contact was reached with Grim Reaper and the server was upgraded. Guest viewing has now been reenabled so we shall play it by ear and see if that was all that's needed.

 

Quick as fuck now with 350 people on :)

 

Thanks DI for sorting and thanks @Grim Reaper for the upgrade...if this is costing more please do set up a crowdfund or something if you want, I'm sure those of us who can would be more than happy to chip in.

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On 09/10/2023 at 16:19, Great Uncle Bulgaria said:

My sister's youngest and his fiancee have made me a Great Uncle for the 4th time, their first contribution to my expanding collection.

My suggestion of 'Cholet' was declined, not for the first time.

I became a great aunt for the 4th time in the summer. I am not sharing the name his parents chose, but Cholet would have been preferable.

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20 minutes ago, Handrejka said:

I became a great aunt for the 4th time in the summer. I am not sharing the name his parents chose, but Cholet would have been preferable.

 

Oh, do tell!  Please!  :evil2:

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;) I have moved, I’m exhausted and only have phone usage. I’ll be little help until I can computer up. Sometime mid January. 

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Drove (!) 1200 miles to visit daughter a few days, driving back starting tonight.  This means I’ve had no time for DDP or and DPs this year.  Oh well.

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41 minutes ago, Sir Creep said:

Drove (!) 1200 miles to visit daughter a few days, driving back starting tonight.  This means I’ve had no time for DDP or and DPs this year.  Oh well.

 

You had about 51 weeks.

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