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Next year. Grim Up North said: "Have you seen the fucking prices of chocolate, cashews and chilli?!!!!!"

Nicky Read back in trouble again, this time for exposing his dick at an arcade before inserting it into a coinchanger machine. While dressed as a jockey.

Not sure if this is the first hit in this pool, but I picked Shane Rimmer here.

Both are 111 today. Bob Weighton says "the secret to my long life is avoiding dying". https://videos.dailymail.co.uk/video/mol/2019/03/29/1830665831887096105/1024x576_MP4_1830665831887096105.mp4 https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-6862469/The-secret-long-life-avoiding-dying-says-Britains-oldest-man-turns-111.html

First hit of the year for my DDP french theme team.

Radio Luxembourg stalwart Bob Stewart dead: https://radiotoday.co.uk/2019/03/tributes-paid-to-radio-presenter-and-voice-over-bob-stewart/

He looks dead to me

Confirmation that Alf Smith has in fact seen 111.

Lot of sense in this speech from the AfD leader in the Bundestag Not that anyone will listen.

Too many variables for us to call it at this distance - a big factor being which bits of his brain took the damage in the stroke. If he can't move there's everything from fluid on his lungs to sepsis from festering sores on his skin (luvverly!). He's likely to get decent medical care, but he's old and potentially up for another stroke if they can't stabilise the mess. We ain't exactly short of polls hereabouts but if there was one on him vs Mugabe I think the older one will last longer

Believe that puts you in third. Your definitely one of the favorites imo (and not just because you slaughtered me in the cup)...

Shane Rimmer, character actor who was probably most famous as the voice of Scott Tracy, dead at 89. He gets the breaking treatment from the redtops.

That is a sharp drop-off. He was still tweeting plans for future music releases less than 24 hours before his death. The poll he put up about them probably hadn't even closed yet. He was excitedly retweeting Sky Ferreira hyping up her first new single in 6 years a few days ago, released on the 27th. He didn't even live to hear it. Must be particularly hard for Sky, who now has no surviving fans left.

Planning a quiet 97th bday: https://www.closerweekly.com/posts/doris-day-planning-a-small-celebration-for-her-97th-birthday/

More actors announced including John Simm http://watchersonthewall.com/game-thrones-prequel-casts-5-new-stars/#more-170184

Only Theresa May could be considered overrated despite being as unpopular as a bag of pork scratchings in a Synagogue.

Ooh, that's a bit "Final Destination".

Anyone else eat peanuts shell and all?? Aaking for a friend. Actually Sir Creep posted on FB and surprisingly found an audience. He is NOT alone!! Far from it. so ..... do you?

As far as I can tell, all five dwarfs from the "Is This The Way to Amarillo?" video are still alive. Craig Salisbury - maintains an active webpage where you can hire the "Shortfella" for stag parties Nicky Read - got arrested for masturbating under a jester's hat on a train, then found work as a "Sleazy Santa". Mick Walter - the (ha ha) biggest star of the pack, should definitely get a QO on passing as he's been in everything. Look. Trevor Jones - was touring with the Bangkok Lady Boys last year, although he still has a cock Albert Wilkinson - one of the original Ooompa Loompas, was still doing panto three years ago.

I was bored on my week off so this is exactly what I did. And then I read it all properly just to check my facts, although admittedly I did miss out all the paragraphs about Tom Cruise (cunt). Not one fucking mention of it so it’s obviously fucking bullshit

Have you? Have you REALLY Lardy?

Playwright Peter Wolf has died of pancreatic cancer: https://www.theguardian.com/stage/2019/mar/29/peter-wolf-obituary

And now she's decided to vote on half her deal rather than the whole thing despite them both being contingent of eachother. Crapfest.

Promising young Spotify musician (and popular 2019 deadpool pick) Billy Clayton has sadly died aged just 22.