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Incidentally (and belatedly) congratulations to The Living End for becoming the first DDP team in history to pass the 1000 points mark! Currently on 65pts which makes a grand total of 1021pts... I salute you!

Kudos to the man whose cancer-googling shadow we all stand in.

Incredible - I'd be slipping him bungs to ignore me if I was famous

Here's mine: Abu Bakr Al-Baghdadi: Warmongers are hunting for him, which I think they'll get him before the end of the year. Also, he's DDT joker. 75% Alan Aspin: 100% dead, but 5% obit chance Tony Booth: I feel he'll die this year, but he'll hold on a bit longer, possibly into 2018. 85% Ian Brady: As I said many times before, he was included due to a gut feeling. I might have to not trust my gut next year. 40% Glen Campbell: The same as Booth. 85% Errol Christie: A fighter, but surely he's going to die soon. 99% Rick Davies: A Lee Evans Gambit I fell for, but I'm not writing him out completely. Yet. His cancer is incurable, so 20% will do. Gord Downie: That very notable media silence which will then lead into death. 99% Greg Gilbert: Many are saying he's a late year death, but since that life saving chemo will only extend his life by 2 weeks, I think he'll die in summer tbh. 95% Heidi Loughlin: Currently tweeting away and doing her bucket list, but if they do take away her drugs, as an article suggested in late January, then she could die. 60% Colin Meads: Currently doing well in his bout with pancreatic cancer, but pancreatic cancer always wins. 65% Simon Ricketts: Was always going to be a 2017/2018 gamble, but he seems to be doing well. 50% Stefan Karl Stefansson: Like Colin Meads, pancreatic cancer always strikes back, just a matter of when. 65% Ben Suisala: He seems fucked with his brain tumor. He'll die, but obitality is another issue. I put it currently at an optimistic 70%.

Oh, might as well update for my dozen survivors. It's March, AKA "My Dead-Certs Are Still Breathing Which Means They're Cured" month. Leah Bracknell: People were too kind in terms of how she looked on "Loose Women". She has a very good chance of dying this year. 95%. Gay Byrne: Early stage prostate cancer. Shitty pick. But he's an octogenarian, so 20% still. Errol Christie: How is he still alive? 100%. Gord Downie: He's about to pass life expectancy, and has been quiet on social media. 100%. Greg Gilbert: Still tweeting away, he might see the year out, but it's more likely he'll die in the fall. 90%. Kristin Hallenga: She has been fighting for almost a decade, but it took a turn for the worse last year. 35%. Heidi Loughlin: Given "a year or two" a year ago, but I suspect it's more grim than that. 60%. King Michael I of Romania: How is he still alive? 100%. Simon Ricketts: Could see the year out. But probably won't. 70%. Rena Salmon: They don't give ya compassionate release for no reason. She has cancer and also had a heart attack two years ago. 45%. Valery Spiridonov: Latest article says the head-chopping thing might be delayed. 30% dammit. Stefan Karl Stefansson: In remission, but it's pan-can so he will die of it. Probably next year, though, with my luck. 40%. So as long as Lakovic and Singh don't obit, and Elias and Meads are exaggerating their conditions, I could make the podium. I'm not making the podium.

With such a deadpooling career he should obit when he goes! Let us know!

Saw Russell Howard last night at the Genting Arena in Birmingham. Very funny. Now I've been to many a gig at that venue, mostly rock bands, I've seen people pissed up, passed out, rough as fuck, venue trashed, but I've never seen anyone kicked out for fist fighting - until last night. At a RUSSELL HOWARD show. Most amusing!

Czech Roman Catholic cardinal, Miloslav Vlk, passed away today at the age of 84.

10 years since stumps for Bob Woolmer, aged 58.

The problem with this country is the press. The press have hounded politicians and demonised them for so long know that nobody sane wants to put up with that level of scrutiny, hassle etc, so we are ran by the very few insane people left who wake up and decide they want to be a politician.

Ain't nobody got time for that.

I am going to go predict that April 1st will be an iconic day in Deadpooling.We get the news that Errol Chritie has died in the early hours of the morning at about 730 am.Catherine Nevin' death is announced at about 11am the same morning.At 12:30 it is announced that Martin McGuinness has died an hour previously.At 4pm Uk time Gord Downies death is announced.Then at 7pm King Michael is announced to have died late afternoon but due to McGuinneses demise he only gets a 10 second mention on the news at 10.

That all sounds very plausible!

I think they are all fucking useless so id not be making any recommendations.

The most disturbing aspect of this is the macho muscle flexing being displayed on all sides. Most folk on the planet just want to get by,but our leaders (elected and otherwise) seem intent on poking each other with sharp sticks. When North Korea eventually develop a nuclear capability then all bets will be off and the U.S. may live to regret making threats.

Ann Beach, perhaps best known for her role of Sonia Barrett in Fresh Fields, has died aged 78.

Given Trump's current estrangement from the truth if he announced his own terminal illness would it make people more or less likely to pick him in a dead pool?

Meantime David Cameron (remember him?) says he won the General Election fair and square. No, you constituency-abandoning chump, you thought that creative accounting would allow you to spend more in constituencies than was permitted by law. It's like tax avoidance for the electoral system. Theresa (remember her?) is on her feet and ahead of the local elections announces she has "plans" to sort out high energy bills which will be revealed "very soon". Why not now? "Give me your vote in the local elections and we'll sort out capitalism and monopoly, promise" wouldn't cut it for me. Still awaiting her so called demolition of Scottish Independence...

No useful ones like "people recently diagnosed with pancreatic cancer but not yet dead"...

Am I the only one who hates Saint Patrick's Day? At least the way Americans celebrate it. It's so fucking childish. Tee-hee-hee leprechauns and clovers and wearing green and pots of gold. Tee-hee-hee "luck" of the Irish even though they all died in a potato famine. I hate to defend the country that brought us Catherine Nevin and Morbidkid, but it's so frustruating that all that these people know about Ireland is fucking ginger-bearded magic-dwarves. And the fucking "Oh, I'm Irish cause my great-grand-pawpaw was" types are the worst.

Yes, it was quite popular over here in the 90s - when Channel 4 did that Top 100 Animated Films/TV show in 2004* compiled by their sponsors the voting public, Spongebob finished in 28th place, ahead of The Magic Roundabout, Rugrats, etc... I thought it was a bit rubbish but I was probably too old for it, younger family members loved it. *Channel 4 didn't have SuperTed on the voting shortlist, so crap list.

Glynis Johns

"Kill Yourself" message left on police officer's car. Maybe an ex-poster has decided to take trolling to a new level

Using fucking gobshite words instead of the words everyone has used for ages. Headmaster on radio today talking about families being 'financially challenged'. The word is POOR and how in fuck's name does calling someone financially challenged instead of poor make their life or situation sound any better. From the frigging dictionary - see below. Just use the fucking word to say what you fucking mean instead of namby pambying around it. Are there some fucking educational guidelines out there somewhere written by some fucking cretin that states that people can't be called poor any more? Fucking Jesus Christ - sometimes I think the world needs that fucking nutter Donald Trump just to fucking sort out these fucking cretins. poor pɔː,pʊə/ adjective 1. lacking sufficient money to live at a standard considered comfortable or normal in a society. "they were too poor to afford a telephone"

Noooo swear filter must be on again