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So we currently have TWO teenagers in the DDP Top 5? I suddenly feel very old...

Yes, because the national enquirer is always a good source to rely on...

I used to play on the linoleum.

Low quality bait though it made me laugh, kudos.

Regarding the over 18s rule. I'd like to offer myself, who is now comfortably over 18 (I'd joined slightly before I turned eighteen though) as evidence that such a limit is an absolute waste of time; if someones a cunt there a cunt regardless of age. Not to mention that you can easily lie about your age on the internet. And wait, The Dead Cow is only eighteen, I always pictured him as a middle aged man! Take that as compliment Dead Cow, it means I thought your posts were valuable and informative.

I used to play the violin very badly, so badly I was told by two separate teachers to give it up.

Aye, but - seriously - the prison of public disgrace and realising his career is over might hit him worse. Whilst he was banged up he could kid himself he still had a career. Now if he Googles most recent internet activity about him; he might find us! Hi Rolf!

US President 1841-45 still has two surviving grandsons Wasn't sure quite where to dump this random fact but it's a good one! Do the maths before reading the article and you'll be scratching your head. To give you a head start he was born in 1790 and 227 years later he has 2 living grandchildren!! Not sure on their obitability.

Prince Charles might disagree.

No Reports of my Death column in The Guardian for a second consecutive week. Could mean something, probably doesn't, thought I'd mention it anyway.

Tries again.....

Which would mean that it only counts if someone's terminal illness is not public knowledge when they die? Btw I'd reckon that Olivia's death would still have some shock value since her optimistic announcement ("some herbal tea, a few photons and I'll be fine") might make her fans believe that her cancer is not life threatening.

Why you being so misogynistic?

You will find that, IF we actually get such an opportunity, us old uns are quite capable of multitasking.

I used to play the drums. Badly. But I am a trained singer.

Is anybody just going fucking?

I still need to use the Tyler grandkids in a dead pool while the chance is there, given my fondness of presidential trivia.

Is this now officially the longest running dead-pool not to restart? (I'm excluding by-election bingo as it isn't actually a dead pool)

Lead story on the BBC News site. The tabloidisation of the BBC continues apace.

Exciting!

It's a bad year to be a former Felt bassist named Mick, as Mick Bund has now died. Played bass on The Pictorial Jackson Review, but here's a track from his band Mexico 70 which he fronted.

Haha - love it! So on our Yewtree Pointless special tonight we have On Podium 1 - Two former DJs Dave Lee Travis, who mainly got found not guilty but was given a 3 month suspended sentence for a bit of adult indecent assault, and Paul Gambaccini, total dodgepot who was not prosecuted so we must presume that he's not as dodgy as he appears. On Podium 2 - Two Coronation Street stars who have both attracted the wrong kind of publicity following Operation Yewtree, Bill Roache and Michael Le Vell, however both cleared of any wrongdoing. Hopefully they have been able to 'soap' away any nasty stains from the experience. On Podium 3 - Two men who like a bit of a laugh, Freddie Starr and Jim Davidson - nothing wrong with a bit of groping I hear you say and the court agreed. On Podium 4 - Two real characters of TV who audiences have enjoyed for years (young girls in their changing rooms less so) but who are both making their comeback appearances tonight after some time away from our screens, Rolf Harris (found guilty of sexually assaulting 12 girls) and Stuart Hall (found guilty of sexually assaulting 15 girls). Rolf is hoping that tonight's show will prove a big 'draw' for his former fans whilst Stuart is hoping to be a 'knockout'. We were going to have a special bonus podium tonight but unfortunately Max Clifford and Gary Glitter were both unable to make it. And now there's only one more person to introduce, always got his fingers in a lot of pies, and those fingers are massive, it's Richard Osman. So let's get on with the show. Round One - name a Cliff Richard Top 20 hit............................

POOR BOB! Pals Fear Frail Bob Barker Hasn’t Much More Time To Live! Yes, because most men at 93 do not have that much time left!

Alzheimer's? I am not speaking medically, but rather common-sensically. The ALZ in Alzheimer's means old. It's a regressive DISEASE that afflicts someone who isn't terribly elderly, but who's mind goes. To me, that is Alzheimer's. Betty White is in her 90s. It is absurd to pin a regressive DISEASE to the mind of a 95-year old who starts having NATURAL brain regression....of say....oh I don't know....a FUCKING NINETY FIVE YEAR OLD. It's not unexpected, in fact NOT having some memory loss would be unexpected. I guess the bottom line is that Sir Creep is saying it's impossible for someone 95 years old to suffer from Alzheimer's. Rather, they suffer from being 95. I welcome all other opinions. Basically so I can get a good chuckle. SC

Betty White, Rosalynn Carter, and Queen Elizabeth II will live to be 100. Carol Burnett and Barbara Eden will live for another decade.